Funniest lines in the films

ok these are mostly from "HBP" and "Deathly Hallows, Part 1" cause those are the only ones i can remember at the moment.....

Hermione: "She's only interested in you because she thinks you're 'The Chosen One'!"
Harry: "But I *AM* 'The Chosen One'..."
**Hermione whacks him with the paper**
Harry: "OK...um, owww, sorry...."

Ron: "So did you and Ginny do it then???"
Harry: ".....what?!?!" (<--BEST LINE EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! :clap: )

Prof. Slughorn: "HARRY!!!!"
Harry: "Sirrrrrrrrrr!!"

Prof. McGonagall: "Why is it whenever there's trouble it's *ALWAYS* you three?"
Ron: "Believe me, I've asked myself that question a lot over the past 6 years"

and from "DH".............

Weasley Twins (as "Harry"): "We're identical!!"

there were quite a few other lines in "Deathly Hallows" that really made me laugh but i'm having trouble thinking of them at the moment as it's 11:10 pm here and i am tired......i'm sure i will think of more later though!!

"Dumbledore's got Style"

and

"Follow the spiders? Why couldn't it be follow the butterflies!!"

Proffesor Trelawney to Ron: "Are you in the BEYOND?" (3rd film)

Malfoy to Harry - "Nice face potter." (6th film)

DH1:

Ron: We wouldn't last two days without her. Don't tell her I said that.

From DH1:

When Harry and Ginny are kissing in the kitchen at the Burrow, George: Morning

:rotfl: The timing and tone is perfect!

And in the snatcher scene when one of them has caught Harry and Scabior (is it him?) says something like "What happened to your face ugly?" and Harry and the other snatcher turn to look at him :lol:

COS-

Ron: "Oh, that'll be a cheerful visit. 'Hello, Hagrid! Tell us, have you been setting anything mad and hairy loose in the castle lately?'"

:lol: I have to rewind that part every time

"Engorgio!...REDUCIO!"

Adding to my last post, Almost every line in the Felix Felicis scene :L

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmNXq-XK2w0

Ron: [pointing to Hermione's cheek; everyone stares] "You've...you've got a bit of toothpaste."
Too cute and too funny. I loved pretty much all the Ron/Hermione moments. :D



Actually that bit is important, because later on Hermione is talking about what she smells when she's smelling the love potion, and there it is...Ron's toothpaste.

"You've...you've got a bit of toothpaste

I can't remember this. I remember a scene in the Three broomsticks where he points out some butterbeer foam....why can't I remember the toothpaste on her cheek scene?

It comes when Harry enters the burrow at the beginning of HBP.

COS-

Ron: "Oh, that'll be a cheerful visit. 'Hello, Hagrid! Tell us, have you been setting anything mad and hairy loose in the castle lately?'"

:lol: I have to rewind that part every time

Hahahaha, I love this line! Rupert's facial expressions are hilarious as well.

PoA:
Draco- You and your bloody chicken.

All Divination classes with Trelawney. I die every time!

HBP:
Hermione- Will. You. Stop. Eating!! Your best friend is missing!

Hermione- She's only interested in you because she thinks you're the chosen one.
Harry- But I am the chosen one!

Harry under Felix Felicis. Brilliant!

DH1:
Moody- Fare warning, it tastes like goblin ****.
Fred- Have lots of experience with that do you Mad Eye?... just trying to diffuse the tension.

Dobby- Dobby never meant to kill! Dobby only meant to maim, or seriously injure!

Harry (with Felix Felicis) walking out of the Gryffindor common room in HBP: "HI!"

Classic.

I absolutely love the Shrieking Shack scene:

Snape: I told Dumbledore you'd help your old friend into the castle and now, here's the proof.
Sirius: Brilliant Snape. Once again you put your keen and penetrating mind to the task and, as usual, come to the wrong conclusion. Now if you'll excuse us, Remus and I have some unfinished business to attend to.
Snape: Give me a reason, I beg you.
Remus: Severus, don't be a fool.
Sirius: He can't help it, it's habit by now.
Remus: Sirius, be quiet!
Sirius: Be quiet yourself, Remus!
Snape: Oh listen to you two, quarreling like an old married couple.
Sirius: Why don't you run along and play with your chemistry set?

Still amazing :lol:

From DH1:

When Harry and Ginny are kissing in the kitchen at the Burrow, George: Morning

:rotfl: The timing and tone is perfect!

And in the snatcher scene when one of them has caught Harry and Scabior (is it him?) says something like "What happened to your face ugly?" and Harry and the other snatcher turn to look at him :lol:
Definitely :D. That was one of my favorite scenes.

Also, Fred's comment to George about his ear... don't remember the line though :(. But it made me laugh my butt off :lol:.

Proffesor Trelawney to Ron: "Are you in the BEYOND?" (3rd film)

Malfoy to Harry - "Nice face potter." (6th film)

Agreed on both. :lol:

Fred and George, always good for a laugh.

The sixth movie was the most hilarious. When Ron said : ''This girls...'' , Harry on the Aragog's burial, when Hermione is mad because she didn't win and get the Felix Felicis.
In seventh are very funny Fred and George in scene ''7 Potters''. Of course they are always funny. ;)

This is one of my favorites!
Professor McGonagall: [to Harry, Ron, & Hermione] Why is it, that whenever anything happens, it's always you three?
Ron Weasley: Believe me, Professor. I've been asking myself that same question for the past six years.

COS-

Ron: "Oh, that'll be a cheerful visit. 'Hello, Hagrid! Tell us, have you been setting anything mad and hairy loose in the castle lately?'"

:lol: I have to rewind that part every time

That is really a funny line. Typical Ron character and humor.

SS -
Hermione - "Look at you playing with your cards. Pathetic. We've got final examinations coming up soon."
Ron - "I'm ready! Ask me any question."
Hermione - "All right. What are the three most crucial ingredients in a Forgetfulness Potion?"
Ron - "I forgot."
Hermione - "And what, may I ask, do you plan to do if this comes up in the final exam?"
Ron - "Copy off you?"
Hermione - "No, you won't! Besides, according to Professor McGonagall, we're going to be given special quills bewitched with an anti-cheating spell."
Ron - "That's insulting! It's as if they don't trust us!"

CoS -
Ron - "They were starving him, mum! There were bars on his window!"
Molly - "Well, you'd best hope I don't put bars on your window, Ronald Weasley!"

Draco - "I didn't know you could read."

Harry - "Promise me something."
Dobby - "Anything, sir."
Harry - "Never try to save my life again."
(I just think this is ironic, especially after DH..)

Sprout - "Oh, Longbottom's been neglecting his earmuffs."
Seamus - "No, ma'am, he's just fainted."
Sprout - "Yes, well, just leave him there."

Myrtle - "If you die down there, you're welcome to share my toilet."

Gilderoy - "Let's have a volunteer pair. Potter, Weasley, how about you?"
Severus - "Weasley's wand causes devastation with the simplest spells. We'll be sending Potter to the hospital wing in a matchbox."

When Lucius tries to use AK on Harry, and Dobby interferes.

PoA -
Severus - "Reveal your secrets. Read it."
Harry - "Messrs. Mooney, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs offer their compliments to Professor Snape and.."
Severus - "Go on."
Harry - "..and request that he keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business."

Ron - "Spiders.. the spiders.. they want me to tap dance. And I don't want to tap dance!"
Harry - "You tell those spiders, Ron."

Lupin - "Now repeat after me - without wands, please - repeat after me, Riddikulus."
Class - "Riddikulus!"
Lupin - "Very good. A little louder, please, and very clearly. Rid-di-kulus."
Class - "Riddikulus!"
Draco - "This class is ridiculous."

When Hermione punches Draco.

Ron - "Looks a bit peaky, doesn't he?"
Fred - "Peaky? What'd you expect him to look like? He fell fifty feet."
George - "Yeah, c'mon, Ron. We'll walk you off the Astronomy Tower and see how you come out looking."
Harry - "Probably a right sight better than he normally does."

Severus - "Which one of you can tell me the difference between an animagus and a werewolf?"
(Hermione raises her hand.)
Severus - "No one? How disappointing."

Hermione - "You know, the Egyptians used to worship cats."
Ron - "Yeah, along with the dung beetle."

Trelawney - "Look at the cup, tell me what you see!"
Ron - "Oh yeah. Well, Harry's got a sort of wonky cross.. that's trials and suffering. And, uh, that there could be the sun, and that's happiness, so.. you're gonna suffer.. but you're gonna be happy about it."

GoF -
Ron - "Hermione.. you're a girl."
Hermione - "Very well spotted."

Ron - "Mum sent me a dress!"
Harry - "Well, it does match your eyes."

Harry - "Why do they have to travel in packs?"

Harry - "Who could possibly figure that out? It's completely mental."

Moody - "You need to find another place to put your chewing gum besides the underside of your desk, Mr. Finnegan?"
Seamus - "No way. The old codger can see out of the back of his head!"
Moody - "And hear across classrooms!"

Hermione - "Promise you'll write this summer, both of you."
Ron - "Oh, I won't. You know I won't."

Ron - "There she was, just walking by.. you know how I like it when they walk.. I couldn't help it.. it just sort of slipped out."
Ginny - "Actually, he sort of screamed it at her. It was a bit frightening."

When Ron dances with Minerva.

Fred - "Well done, dragon!"

Ron - "I look like my great aunt Tessie! I smell like my great Aunt Tessie!"

Minerva - "Inside every girl is a swan, waiting to burst out in flight."
Ron - "Something is about to burst out of Eloise Midgen, but I don't think it's a swan."

Minerva - "Professor Moody! What are you doing?"
Moody - "Teaching."
Minerva - "Teach - is that a student?"
Moody - "Technically, it's a ferret."

Hermione - "Ronald would like me to tell you that Seamus told him that Dean was told by Parvarti that Hagrid's looking for you."
Harry - "Is that right? Well.. what?"
Hermione - "Uh.. Dean was told by Parvarti.. please don't ask me to say it again. Hagrid's looking for you."
Harry - "Well, you can tell Ronald.."
Hermione - "I'm not an owl!"

Rita - "This is cozy."
Harry - "It's a broom cupboard."
Rita - "Well, you should feel right at home, then."

Fred - "We knew you wouldn't die, Harry!"
George - "Might lose a leg."
Fred - "Or an arm."
George - "But pack it in all together?"
Fred and George - "Never!"

George - "Four people will go down.."
Fred - "But will four come up?"
Ginny - "Why do you have to be so mean?"

OotP -
Vernon - "Justice!"

Dolores - "There will be no need to talk."
Hermione - "No need to think is more like it."

Harry - "Hey Big D. Beat up another ten year old?"
Dudley - "This one deserved it."
Harry - "Five against one. That's very brave."
Dudley - "Well, you're one to talk, moaning in your sleep every night. At least I'm not afraid of my pillow. 'Don't kill Cedric!' Who's Cedric, your boyfriend?"

Nymphadora - "They're very clean, these muggles. It's unnatural."

Ron - "Hermione, I hate your cat."

Hermione - "I can't understand why you don't want to wear it, Ronald."
Ron - "Cause I'll look like a bloody idiot, that's why."
Hermione - "No more than usual."

Hermione - "That was clever, Ron!"
Ron - "It's been known to happen."

Ron - "Don't worry, I'll go easy on you."
Hermione - "Thanks, Ronald."

Dolores - "You know, I really hate children."

Harry - "He's got Padfoot! He's got Padfoot at the place where it's hidden!"
Dolores - "Padfoot? What is Padfoot? And where what's hidden? What is he talking about, Snape?"
Severus - "No idea."

Any quote about Nargles.

Fred - "You know, George, I've always felt our futures lay outside the world of academic achievement."
George - "Fred, I've been thinking exactly the same thing."

Hermione - "Do you ever stop eating?"

Dolores - "Please, tell them I mean no harm!"
Harry - "Sorry, Professor, but I must not tell lies."

Hermione - "Just because you've got the emotional range of a teaspoon."

Severus - "I may vomit."

Dolores - "You applied first for the Defense Against the Dark Arts post, is that correct?"
Severus - "Yes."
Dolores - "But you were unsuccessful?"
Severus - "Obviously."

Kingsley - "Dumbledore's got style."

Luna - "You're not going mad. I see them, too. You're just as sane as I am."

Nymphadora - "Don't call me Nymphadora!"

Sirius - "My mother did that after I ran away. Charming woman."

HBP
Hermione - "Hey! She's only interested in you because she thinks you're the Chosen One."
Harry - "But I am the Chosen One."
(Smack!)

Hermione - "Excuse me, I have to go vomit."

Lavender - "Ah! See? He senses my presence. Don't worry, Won-Won! I'm here. I'm here."
Ron - "Her..my..nee. Hermione.."

Ron - "It's beautiful, isn't it? The moon."
Harry - "Divine. Had ourselves a little late night snack, did we?"
Ron - "It was on your bed, the box, I just thought I'd try one."
Harry - "Or twenty."
Ron - "I can't stop thinking about her, Harry."
Harry - "Honestly, you know, I reckon she was starting to annoy you."
Ron - "She could never annoy me. I think I love her."
Harry - "Oh.. brilliant."
Ron - "Do you think she knows I exist?"
Harry - "Well, I'd bloody well hope so, she's been snogging you for three months."
Ron - "Snogging? Who are you talking about?"
Harry - "Who are you talking about?"
Ron - "Romilda, of course. Romilda Vane."
Harry - "Okay, very funny."
Ron - "It's no joke! I'm in love with her!"
Harry - "Alright, fine, you're in love with her! Have you ever actually met her?"
Ron - No.. can you introduce me?"

Minerva - "Potter, take Weasley with you. He looks far too happy over there."

Ginny - "He's covered in blood again. Why is it he's always covered in blood?"
Ron - "Well, it looks like it's his own this time."

Ginny - "Shut it!"

Ron - "How much are these?"
Fred and George - "Five galleons."
Ron - "How much for me?"
Fred and George - "Five galleons."
Ron - "I'm your brother!"
Fred and George - "Ten galleons."

Minerva - "Why is it, that whenever anything happens, it's always you three?"
Ron - "Believe me, Professor. I've been asking myself that same question for the past six years."

Rubeus - "Seriously misunderstood creatures, spiders are. It's the eyes, I reckon, they unnerve some folk."
Harry - "Not to mention the pincers.."

Ron - "What do you think he sees in her?"
Harry - "She's smart.. funny.. attractive.."
Ron - "Attractive?"
Harry - "Well, you know.. she has nice.. skin."
Ron - "So, you think he is going out with her because she has nice skin?"
Harry - "Well, I dunno, I'm just saying it could be a contributing factor."
Ron - "Hermione's got nice skin. You know, as far as skin goes."
Harry - "I've never thought about it before. But now that you mention it, yeah. Very nice.. I think I'll be going to bed now."

Horace - "Exactly how did you get out of the castle, Harry?"
Harry - "Through the front door, sir."

Hermione - "How do you feel?"
Harry - "Excellent. Really excellent!"
Hermione - "Remember, Slughorn usually eats early, takes a walk, and then returns to his office."
Harry - "Right. I'm going down to Hagrid's."

Waitress - "'Harry Potter'. Who's Harry Potter?"
Harry - "Oh, no one. Bit of a tosser, really."

DH1 -
Fred and George - "We're identical!"

Lucius - "My Lord?"
Voldemort - "My Lord?"

Fred - "How you feeling, Georgie?"
George - "..saint-like."
Fred - "Come again?"
George - "Saint-like. I'm holey."

Waitress - "Can I take your order?"
Hermione - "I'll have a cappucino."
Waitress - "You?"
Ron - "What she said."
Harry - "Same."

Ron - "Just think. Only three more to go."

Dobby - "Dobby never meant to kill! Dobby only meant to maim, or seriously injure!"

Ron - "Are you mental?"

Harry - "You're lying, Dolores, and you musn't tell lies!"

Harry - "This is mental."
Hermione - "Completely mental."
Ron - "The world's mental."

Dobby - "Dobby has no master. Dobby is a free elf, and Dobby has come to save Harry Potter and his friends!"

Ron - "Hey!"
Hermione - "You.. complete arse, Ronald Weasley! You show up here after weeks, and you say, 'Hey'?"

"Devil's Snare, Devil's Snare ... What did Professor Sprout say? It likes dark and the damp-"
"So light a fire!" Harry choked.
"Yes-of course-but there's no wood!" Hermione cried, wringing her hands.
"HAVE YOU GONE MAD?" Ron bellowed. "ARE YOU A WITCH OR NOT?"
"Oh, right!"

xDDD

"Devil's Snare, Devil's Snare ... What did Professor Sprout say? It likes dark and the damp-"
"So light a fire!" Harry choked.
"Yes-of course-but there's no wood!" Hermione cried, wringing her hands.
"HAVE YOU GONE MAD?" Ron bellowed. "ARE YOU A WITCH OR NOT?"
"Oh, right!"

xDDD

That's a great one, too. :elaugh:

PoA:

Trelawney: "Are you in the beyond? I think you are!"
Ron: "Sure.."
Trelawney: "Look in the cup!"
Ron: "Harry's got a sort of wonky cross, that's trials and suffering, and that there could be the sun, that's happiness. So.. You're going to suffer, but you're going to be happy about it..."


HBP:

Just about everything Harry says while he' on Felix Felicis :D

"Not to mention the pincers!" *click click click* :D Gets me every time!


DH1:

Fred and George: "Wow! We're identicle!"

Hermione: "You complete ARSE Ronald Weasley! You turn up here after weeks! And you say 'hey'?"

Ron: "Midnight, Mum always said Midnight."
Hermione: *Glares at Ron*
Ron: "But twilight's fine! Better even!"
Hermione: "Do you want to read it?"
Ron: "No... No..."

Ron: "Blackthorn, ten inches, nothing special."

That last one I found hilarious, but no one else in the cinema laughed (and I went three seperate times!). I was glad to find out one of my friends laughed as well when she heard it :)

I'm sure there's more, but they're the ones that come to mind now.

Ron: "Blackthorn, ten inches, nothing special."

That last one I found hilarious, but no one else in the cinema laughed (and I went three seperate times!). I was glad to find out one of my friends laughed as well when she heard it :)


I'm sure I'm just being dense here but why did you find that line funny?

PoA:

Ron: "Blackthorn, ten inches, nothing special."

That last one I found hilarious, but no one else in the cinema laughed (and I went three seperate times!). I was glad to find out one of my friends laughed as well when she heard it :)

I'm sure there's more, but they're the ones that come to mind now.

I think I get it.. it took me a minute, but then I starting laughing.
haha, but I think windoftheworld practically named all the ones I remember.

I obviously have a more devious mind than the average Harry Potter fan :)

DH1
Ron: Do you think she'll come around?
Harry: Keep talking about that ball of light touching your heart...

Harry: Engorio. RUDICIO!

"Technically, it's a ferret." --The Best.

COS - Uncle Vernon complaining about Harry and his bloody pigeon when they were leaving.
POA- Draco, after he was attacked by Buckbeak, he told Hagrid that he was in trouble with his "bloody chicken".
GOF: when Harry mentioned that he hadn't figured out the clue to the second task, Hermione says "Harry, the tournament is in two days", and Harry says "really? I didn't know that". (at least that's what I think I heard) Harry was being sarcastic.

"Technically, it's a ferret." --The Best.
:agree: Malfoy the ferret :D. One of my favorite parts of GOF.

Harry: Engorio. RUDICIO!
I laughed so much at that:lol:

SS -
Hermione - "Look at you playing with your cards. Pathetic. We've got final examinations coming up soon."
Ron - "I'm ready! Ask me any question."
Hermione - "All right. What are the three most crucial ingredients in a Forgetfulness Potion?"
Ron - "I forgot."
Hermione - "And what, may I ask, do you plan to do if this comes up in the final exam?"
Ron - "Copy off you?"
Hermione - "No, you won't! Besides, according to Professor McGonagall, we're going to be given special quills bewitched with an anti-cheating spell."
Ron - "That's insulting! It's as if they don't trust us!"


Is that in the book or the film???



Dobby - "Dobby never meant to kill! Dobby only meant to maim, or seriously injure!"

I love that one as well!!! :D

Another one of my favourites;

Moody: Fair warning, it [Polyjuice Potion] tastes like goblin p**s.
Fred Weasley: Have lots of experience with that, do you, Mad-Eye?
(Moody glares)
Fred Weasley: Just trying to diffuse the tension.

Philosopher's Stone:
VERNON: Fine day, Sunday. In my opinion, the best day of the week. [...] No post on Sundays. Hah!...No blasted letters today! No, sir! Not one single bloody letter! Not one! No sir, not one blasted, miserable -


Chamber of Secrets:
RON: Follow the spiders! Follow the spiders! If Hagrid ever gets out of Azkaban, I’ll kill him!

GINNY: Mummy, have you seen my jumper?
MRS. WEASLEY: Yes dear, it was on the cat.

DRACO: Reading? [Goyle!Harry nods]...I didn't know you could read.


Prisoner of Azkaban:
REMUS: Severus, don't be a fool.
SIRIUS: He can't help it Remus, it's bound to be a habit by now.


Goblet of Fire:
RON: Blimey, Dad. How far up are we?
LUCIUS: Well, put it this way: if it rains, you’ll be the first to know.

DUMBLEDORE: (knocks on the door and walks in speaking to Harry alone) I never liked these curtains. I set them on fire in my fourth year. By accident, of course.


Order of the Phoenix:
UMBRIDGE: You applied first for the Defense Against the Dark Arts post, is that correct?
SNAPE: ...Yeees.
UMBRIDGE: But you were unsuccessful?
SNAPE: ...Obviously.

[Crookshanks starts to play with the Extendable Ear, eventually pulling it loose]
RON: Hermione, I hate your cat.

FUDGE: You will escort Dumbledore to Azkaban, to await trial for conspiracy and sedition --
DUMBLEDORE: Ah, I thought we might hit this little snag.

[Snape has just witnessed Harry's memory of seeing his parents in the Mirror of Erised.]
SNAPE: Feeling sentimental?

[Series of flashbacks, including a touching moment between Harry and Sirius.]
SNAPE: I may vomit.


Half-Blood Prince:
DUMBLEDORE: Oh, to be young and to feel love's keen sting.

RON: [under influence of a love potion, hugging Slughorn] Hello, darling. Fancy a drink?

HARRY: I just know.
SNAPE: You. Just. Know?

LUNA: I've never been to this part of the castle. Well, not when I'm awake. I sleep-walk, you see. That's why I wear shoes to bed.

RON: ...Hermione's got nice skin. You know, as skin goes, I mean.
HARRY: I-I've never really thought about it. But I suppose, yeah. Very nice. [long pause]...I think I'll be going to sleep now.

DRACO: Who else is here? I heard you talking.
DUMBLEDORE: I often talk aloud to myself. I find it extraordinarily useful.


Deathly Hallows:
RON: Mum used to read those to me as a kid! "The Wizard and the Hopping Pot", "Babbity Rabbity And Her Cackling Stump"... [Harry and Hermione both look lost] Come on! Babitty Rabbity!...No?

DOBBY: [After dropping a chandelier from the ceiling] Dobby never meant to kill! Dobby only meant to maim, or seriously injure!

RON (as CATTERMOLE): Oh my god, what am I going to do, what am I going to do?! My wife's all alone downstairs!

YAXLEY: Cattermole. It's still raining inside my office. That's two days now.
RON (as CATTERMOLE): Have you tried an umbrella?

HARRY: Engorgio. *FWOOM* REDUCIO!

I don't know what he was talking about but when Harry says to Neville in GOF "Neville, your doing it again" I love that just becuz I am not use to Harry being so snippy, it was cute and funny.
I think it was because Neville was expressing his enthusiasm for Herbology and Harry was getting tired of it :lol:

Is that in the book or the film???
I think it's a deleted scene from the film.

"Devil's Snare, Devil's Snare ... What did Professor Sprout say? It likes dark and the damp-"
"So light a fire!" Harry choked.
"Yes-of course-but there's no wood!" Hermione cried, wringing her hands.
"HAVE YOU GONE MAD?" Ron bellowed. "ARE YOU A WITCH OR NOT?"
"Oh, right!"

It's not in a funny situation, but I have to give a little chuckle when Harry's digging through Hermione's bag for the dittany, then finally when she yells to hurry, he finally does "Accio Dittany". It always strikes me as one of those "are you a wizard or not?" moments.

Sorry, just wanted to say:

YEHEHEE!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLKzJtjyc0E

:rotfl:

Deathly Hallows Part 2 when Harry, Ron and Hermione go back to Hogwarts and Ginny sees Harry and Ron says, "She hasn't seen me in 6 months and its like im Frankie First Year" or somthing like that.

I think i'm going to have to go with the all time classic "I'm going to bed before either of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed. Or worse...expelled!"

"She needs to sort out her priorities."



Still makes me chuckle 10 years later.

I love the scene in GoF when Ron has to dance with McGonagall.
"Put your hand on my waist-"
"WHERE?"

hahaa.

From what I can remember, I liked best

"I may vomit" - Snape, OotP :rotfl:

"If we die for them, I`m gonna kill you, Harry!" - Ron, DH 2

Lupin: *awesome quote that's in my sig*
Kingsley: Who said that?
Lupin: Me.

Lupin: *awesome quote that's in my sig*
Kingsley: Who said that?
Lupin: Me.

Hey! That's not a funny line... That's an awesome line! :p

Ron (suddenly waking up from a nightmare): The spiders! The spiders, Harry! They want me to tap dance! I don't want to tap dance!!
Harry: ...You tell those spiders, Ron.
Ron: Yeah... spiders... tell them.... *immediately falls back asleep* XDDD

Dunno if its been posted but ive always loved kingsleys line after dumbledore escapes "Well, you have to admit minister, dumbledores got style."

PoA - Harry, after Hermione uses the Time-Turner and he's now looking at himself in the past: "This is not normal!"

(Because there's any part of his life that actually is?)

"If we die for them, I`m gonna kill you, Harry!" - Ron, DH 2

Heh. An echo of Ron's "Follow the spiders. Follow the spiders! If Hagrid ever gets out of Azkaban, I'll kill him!" (CoS)

I loved McGonagall's reference to Seamus Finnegan's proclivity for blowing up things. Too funny!

I also loved Ron's reaction when Ginny doesn't even notice him in the RoR upon the Trio's return to Hogwarts. I cannot recall the exact line, but it was funny.

PoA - Harry, after Hermione uses the Time-Turner and he's now looking at himself in the past: "This is not normal!"

(Because there's any part of his life that actually is?)

^That exact thought goes through my head everytime I see that scene :rotfl:

I think most of my favourite ones have been mentioned. Snape's "...obviously..." to Umbridge makes me laugh everytime I see it. And Minerva's "There are several things I would like to say"

"What are you doing?" "Teaching" :rotfl: another one of those "I laugh every time I see it" moments.

Pretty much anything Lucius Malfoy says when he's being uber-smug. "Red hair, vacant expressions...tatty, second-hand book...you must be The Weasleys.", "...you call this a house?" Jason Isaacs' delivery just cracks me up.

And Draco's "I'm dying!" after the encounter with the hippogriff...he says it in a really high voice and it amuses me.

I'm sure this has been said a million times already, but the Felix Felicis scene in Half Blood Prince was perfect and hilarious.

Also, this wasn't supposed to be funny, but the way Voldemort said "avada kedavra" in the last movie literally made me hysterical, especially since i was tired (midnight showing) and half-crying

I loved McGonagall's reference toe Seamus Finnegan's proclivity for blowing up things. Too funny!

I also loved Ron's reaction when Ginny doesn't even notice him in the RoR upon the Trio's return to Hogwarts. I cannot recall the exact line, but it was funny.

ginny- "harry"
harry- "hello there"
ron- *waving in the backround_
ron- "6 months shes hasnt seen me and its like im frankie first year, im her brother"
seamus- "shes got loads of those, theres only one harry"

hahahah is that the line you mean? i love that line tooooo :rotfl: lol

I totally forgot this scene in CoS:

"No Harry, even in the magical world, hearing voices isn't a good thing."
*random dude in a portrait on the wall pipes up with*
"She's right, you know!"

Stupid portraits, always making you feel inferior by passing comment when you didn't ask them to :rotfl:

ah! I have a lot! My favorite would have to be when McGonagall says, "I've always wanted to do that!" when she is summoning the huge stone guards during DH2. Cracks me up everytime...hahaha

ginny- "harry"
harry- "hello there"
ron- *waving in the backround_
ron- "6 months shes hasnt seen me and its like im frankie first year, im her brother"
seamus- "shes got loads of those, theres only one harry"

hahahah is that the line you mean? i love that line tooooo :rotfl: lol

Yes!! Frankie First Year! I was hysterical over that! And then Seamus' line right after. LOL

During the time turner scene, when Harry and Hermione come back to the hospital ward,

Hermione: We did it professor, he is free
Dumbledore: Did what?......Goodbyeee

I love the way Dumbledore says Goodbye. It's really funny.

OOTP:

Vernon: Justice!

Draco: "I didn't know you could read."

I just cracked up at this line when I was little.

Ron - Hes lost his marbles
I was dying

Also, this wasn't supposed to be funny, but the way Voldemort said "avada kedavra" in the last movie literally made me hysterical, especially since i was tired (midnight showing) and half-crying

aaaaaaaveblahkeblahhvaaaahhh! :rotfl:

After Ginny and Harry's awkward kiss scene
Ron: So... did you do it?
Harry: Hm?
Ron: You know... hide the book.
Harry: Oh yeah,,,

and also one of my favourites
Professor Minerva McGonagall: [to Harry, Ron, & Hermione] Why is it, that whenever anything happens, it's always you three?
Ron Weasley: Believe me, Professor. I've been asking myself that same question for the past six years.

I totally forgot this scene in CoS:

"No Harry, even in the magical world, hearing voices isn't a good thing."
*random dude in a portrait on the wall pipes up with*
"She's right, you know!"

Stupid portraits, always making you feel inferior by passing comment when you didn't ask them to :rotfl:
:lol: I love that so much! Makes me wish they kept Phineas Nigellus in.

"I may vomit" - Snape, OotP
Where is this line said? I dont recall that.

Quote:
"I may vomit" - Snape, OotP
Where is this line said? I dont recall that.

It's during the occlumency lessons, you see Snape appear in Harry's memories right before Harry goes back to the present.

After Ginny and Harry's awkward kiss scene
Ron: So... did you do it?
Harry: Hm?
Ron: You know... hide the book.
Harry: Oh yeah,,,


I loved that! Me and my brother were watching it and we have the dirtiest minds, so when Ron said, "Did you do it?", we just burst out laughing!:rotfl:

One of my favorites is from PoA:
"The spiders they want me to tap dance. I don't want to tap dance!"-Ron
"You tell those spiders Ron."-Harry

Probably already been said, but I love the 'but I am the chosen one' line... always makes me laugh out loud...

One of my favorites is from PoA:
"The spiders they want me to tap dance. I don't want to tap dance!"-Ron
"You tell those spiders Ron."-Harry

Haha, I love that one too!
But spiders are freaky - period.

My personal favorite is when Harry meet's Slughorn during the Felix Felises scene. The way Dan says it just cracks me up
"Harry!"
"Sir..."

Forgot this one "The binding is fragile" :rotfl:

Forgot this one "The binding is fragile" :rotfl:

When said by whom? Harry? Or Hermione? :)

When said by whom? Harry? Or Hermione? :)

Said by Harry, to Hermione, when she asks to see whose Potions book it is. Harry tells her the binding is fragile and puts it behind his back. Ginny then sneaks it out of his hands and reveals the name written inside to be the "Half Blood Prince".

When Hermione said:
"Stop it, Ron. You're making it snow."

Snape's "OBVIOUSLY." cracks me up every time xD

When Seamus said:
"She has lots of brothers, but only one Harry."

Said by Harry, to Hermione, when she asks to see whose Potions book it is. Harry tells her the binding is fragile and puts it behind his back. Ginny then sneaks it out of his hands and reveals the name written inside to be the "Half Blood Prince".

I know. I was alluding to the fact that she says the line right back at him.

I know. I was alluding to the fact that she says the line right back at him.

Oh. Whoops!

>Well, at least we've still got Bogrod.

Big Dragon turns Bogrod to ash.

>Well that's unfortunate

:lol:

I love the whole scene in the Room of Requirement with Dumbledore's Army in the Deathly Hallows part 2! Everything they say during that short period is well hysterical!

*Harry is about to pass out and his arm's broken*
Lockhart: Don't worry Harry, I'll fix it
Harry: Oh no... not you!
Lockhart: Oh come now, Harry, he doesn't know what he's saying!

Also a classic from Snape:
"I may vomit..."

The scene that makes me laugh out loud every time is the one at Slughorn's Christmas party after Cormac vomits at Snape's feet.

Snape: "...you see, he's traveling, and he won't return until term resumes."

Harry: 'Traveling where?"

Snape: *blank stare*
*blink*
*walks away*

Cracks me up for some reason.

The scene that makes me laugh out loud every time is the one at Slughorn's Christmas party after Cormac vomits at Snape's feet.

Snape: "...you see, he's traveling, and he won't return until term resumes."

Harry: 'Traveling where?"

Snape: *blank stare*
*blink*
*walks away*

Cracks me up for some reason.

My sister and I burst out laughing every time we hit that scene! My personal favorite is from HP7 Part 2 when McGonagall is giving out orders.

Neville: Are you really giving us permission to do this?
McGonagall: Yes, Longbottom.
Neville: Blow it up? Boom?
McGonagall: BOOM!

DH2...

Filch: " Students out of bed, students in the corridor!!:
McGonagall: " They're supposed to be out of bed, you blithering idiot!"
Filch" Oh, sorry maam"


This cracks me up every time!!

DH2...

Filch: " Students out of bed, students in the corridor!!:
McGonagall: " They're supposed to be out of bed, you blithering idiot!"
Filch" Oh, sorry maam"


This cracks me up every time!!

That part had me crackin' I love Filch in this movie.

The love potion scene dialogue between Ron and Harry. Not just the dialogue though, but the way they interact. The awkwardness of it is hilarious.

The love potion scene dialogue between Ron and Harry. Not just the dialogue though, but the way they interact. The awkwardness of it is hilarious.

Heh heh, yeah. "I'm just saying it could be a contributing factor."

Radcliffe was just OK in CoS, but he has a priceless delivery when Harry and Ron confront Lockhart in his office after Ginny's been taken. They're going to tell him what they know, when they notice that he doesn't seem to be preparing to go after Ginny.

"Are you going somewhere?" asks Harry, in a tone that I find perfectly halfway between accusatory and disbelieving.

there are tons of funny lines from the movie but i have to agree with this one,the line and the delivery make me laugh everytime

"Chinesse Fireball oooooooooh"

The scene that makes me laugh out loud every time is the one at Slughorn's Christmas party after Cormac vomits at Snape's feet.

Snape: "...you see, he's traveling, and he won't return until term resumes."

Harry: 'Traveling where?"

Snape: *blank stare*
*blink*
*walks away*

Cracks me up for some reason.

My second favourite 'funny' out of all the films. I also literally laugh out loud every time I watch that particular scene. Snape's response to Harry's "Traveling where?" is brilliant.

This very well known and much quoted scene from OotP is my most favourite amongst all...

Dolores Umbridge: "You applied first for the Defense Against the Dark Arts post, is that correct?"
Severus Snape: "Yes."
Dolores Umbridge: "But you were unsuccessful?"
Severus Snape: "Obviously."

And who could forget Fred and George in HBP

Ron Weasley: "How much are these?"
Fred Weasley, George Weasley: "5 galleons."
Ron Weasley: "How much for me?"
Fred Weasley, George Weasley: "5 galleons."
Ron Weasley: "I'm your brother!"
Fred Weasley, George Weasley: "10 galleons."

I love the scene in GoF when Ron has to dance with McGonagall.

"Now, Mr. Weasley, put your right hand on my waist."
"Where?"

and Fred and George just wolf-whistle and Harry's like, "You're never going to let him forget this, are you?"
and they go, "Never!"

and then Neville goes up to dance.

That whole scene, though not in the books, is extremely light-hearted and funny, and I love it.

I love the scene in GoF when Ron has to dance with McGonagall.

"Now, Mr. Weasley, put your right hand on my waist."
"Where?"

and Fred and George just wolf-whistle and Harry's like, "You're never going to let him forget this, are you?"
and they go, "Never!"

and then Neville goes up to dance.

That whole scene, though not in the books, is extremely light-hearted and funny, and I love it.
:agree: I loved that entire sequence. So, so utterly priceless :rotfl:.

As for funny bits... there are too many to count :).

Filch: " Students out of bed, students in the corridor!!:
McGonagall: " They're supposed to be out of bed, you blithering idiot!"
Filch" Oh, sorry maam"

This cracks me up every time!!
I enjoyed this scene in the book much more than in the film. I am not impressed with how comic they made Filch in the latter films. He was comic in the books, I think, because of his constant feud with the students and the way he approached situations, but I found it all realistic at the same time. In the films they seem to go out of their way to make him funny (e.g. concentrating on his awkward running in GoF and his feeble attempts at discovering the D.A. in OotP). The same is true for this scene in DH2: I felt it was forced, as if the filmmakers felt obliged to include it to oblige the fans with this scene from the book and also to solidify their characterization of Filch as a laughingstock.

Personally, I loved Filch in SS/PS and CoS. The roll of his eyes when Hagrid is pouting about Norbert is hilarious, especially when preceded by, "Oh good God man, you're still not on about that bloody dragon are you?" :lol:

I enjoyed this scene in the book much more than in the film. I am not impressed with how comic they made Filch in the latter films. He was comic in the books, I think, because of his constant feud with the students and the way he approached situations, but I found it all realistic at the same time. In the films they seem to go out of their way to make him funny (e.g. concentrating on his awkward running in GoF and his feeble attempts at discovering the D.A. in OotP). The same is true for this scene in DH2: I felt it was forced, as if the filmmakers felt obliged to include it to oblige the fans with this scene from the book and also to solidify their characterization of Filch as a laughingstock.

Really? It's the opposite with me, I thought that part was forced in the book but hilarious in the film. In fact I thought he was genuinely funny in the films as well.

Just out of curiosity. Ron's line in DH1 'The sword was stolen. Yeah, I'm still here' are supposed to be funny or is it just my country's terrible dubbing that makes them hilarious?
And something that I spotted many many watchings after the first time I saw PS when in trio¡s 1st potions class Harry's taking notes like bottle fame, brew glory, stopper death. It's hilarious. And the twins with 'We got Potter, we got Potter!' aaaand.. George with 'Morning' when Harry and Ginny are kissing. And after Harry takes the felix felicis. Slughorn 'Harry!' and Harry 'Professor!' HilariousxD

Just out of curiosity. Ron's line in DH1 'The sword was stolen. Yeah, I'm still here' are supposed to be funny or is it just my country's terrible dubbing that makes them hilarious?

I don't think that line is supposed to be funny. He's upset (partly because of the Horcrux, partly out of jealousy), and he's resentful. In the original, it's not at all funny (in my opinion).

The scene that makes me laugh out loud every time is the one at Slughorn's Christmas party after Cormac vomits at Snape's feet.

Snape: "...you see, he's traveling, and he won't return until term resumes."

Harry: 'Traveling where?"

Snape: *blank stare*
*blink*
*walks away*

Cracks me up for some reason.

This is one of my favorites too! And right before when he has to say something to Harry that doesn't include sarcasm (because he's delivering a message on behalf of Dumbledore)--it's like he doesn't know what to do with himself. It's perfect!

And it's one of the reasons I think Rickman is such a great actor. Comedy is very hard to do and he just nails that scene! If you've never seen him in Galaxy Quest, you're missing out on a great film!

there are tons of funny lines from the movie but i have to agree with this one,the line and the delivery make me laugh everytime

"Chinesse Fireball oooooooooh"

Oh i know! For some reason that does crack me up. The look on Crouch's face. "Oooooooooo"

This is one of my favorites too! And right before when he has to say something to Harry that doesn't include sarcasm (because he's delivering a message on behalf of Dumbledore)--it's like he doesn't know what to do with himself. It's perfect!

And it's one of the reasons I think Rickman is such a great actor. Comedy is very hard to do and he just nails that scene! If you've never seen him in Galaxy Quest, you're missing out on a great film!

It is perfect. One of my favorite Snape scenes.

And I've seen him in pretty much everything, aside from a couple films I just cannot seem to get my hands on. (I kinda, sorta love him.)

Oh i know! For some reason that does crack me up. The look on Crouch's face. "Oooooooooo"

It's a bit weird. It reminds me of the "oooh" face made by many a Gary Larson Far Side comic character.

The scene that makes me laugh out loud every time is the one at Slughorn's Christmas party after Cormac vomits at Snape's feet.

Snape: "...you see, he's traveling, and he won't return until term resumes."

Harry: 'Traveling where?"

Snape: *blank stare*
*blink*
*walks away*

Cracks me up for some reason.

The entire sequence was hilarious...I laugh until tears roll down my face...everytime. :rotfl:

This is one of my favorites too! And right before when he has to say something to Harry that doesn't include sarcasm (because he's delivering a message on behalf of Dumbledore)--it's like he doesn't know what to do with himself. It's perfect!
The snark is in the movement. Observe!
http://i56.tinypic.com/2a6wm4y.jpg

Srsly, its dripping with silent snark! I love that scene. And right before it when McLaggen pukes on Snape's shoes and hes like "Youve just earned detention, McLaggen."

The snark is in the movement. Observe!
http://i56.tinypic.com/2a6wm4y.jpg

Srsly, its dripping with silent snark! I love that scene. And right before it when McLaggen pukes on Snape's shoes and hes like "Youve just earned detention, McLaggen."

Added snark bonus:

Snape: You just bought yourself a month's detention McLaggen not so quick Potter [with not so much as a pause for breath].

Harry: Sir, I really think I should rejoin the party, my date--

Snape: --can surely survive your absence for another minute [minuscule disdainful pause] or two. Besides I only wish to convey a message.

Harry: Message?

Snape: From Professor Dumbledore. He asked me to give you his best and he hopes you enjoy your holiday. You see, he's travelling, and he won't return until term resumes.

Harry: Travelling where?

Snape: [stares fixedly at Harry for a pregnant pause, then swivels dismissively and exits stage left]

I also think the music helps to make this scene.

The snark is in the movement. Observe!
http://i56.tinypic.com/2a6wm4y.jpg

Srsly, its dripping with silent snark! I love that scene. And right before it when McLaggen pukes on Snape's shoes and hes like "Youve just earned detention, McLaggen."

This gif has made my night! Thank you for that! :)

Three things come to mind in particular.

"Reading? I didn't know you could read."

And

"I've always wanted to use that spell."

And

Ron: "So... did you do it?"
Harry: "What?"
Ron: "Hide the book."
Harry: "Oh... right."

I'm sure there are more, I just can't think of them. I need to watch the movies more.

This is the one that immediately pops into my mind. It's in the very last movie when the Gringotts dragon toasts the goblin bank manager.

Ron looks on and remarks:

"That's unfortunate."

I like when Harry is talking about the spiders pincers in HBP lol .... and when dawn french played the fat lady she was funny.... and Snape was funny the whole series....... when he pulls up his sleeves and forces harry and ron's heads into their books in the great hall ... and slaps Ron over the head with a book haha and OOTP during Umbridge inspection... "you applied first for the defense agains the dark arts job?" "yes" "but you were.. unsuccessful?" "OBviously." hahahahaha

Ron: "So... did you do it?"
Harry: "What?"
Ron: "Hide the book."
Harry: "Oh... right."

Ron actually says, "So...did you and Ginny do it?" in case anyone's wondering why Harry suddenly looks suspiciously guilty. But Ron doesn't catch on.

Actually, one of my favorite funny lines is one of the last (I probably don't have the wording quite right).

Harry: ...until a couple of weeks ago, when I overpowered Draco, at Malfoy Manor.

Ron: But that means the Elder Wand...

Harry: [shrugging] Yeah...it's mine.

On paper, not so funny, but Radcliffe's delivery of "It's mine" is pitch perfect--casual, as if he wasn't the master of the most powerful wand in the world (as Ron puts it a moment later), but acknowledging the truth.

When Harry drinks the Felix Felicis Radcliffe gives one of the gretest performances in the saga for me, it makes me laugh everytime I see it.

The tip-tap dance gets me all the time! ahah!

Ron: "Don't tell hermione I said this" (DH1) ahahahahha!

Harry: "But I am the chosen one" (HBP) Great delivery!

In CoS when Polyjuice-Harry explains that he has glasses on for reading, Draco replies: " Didn't know you could read" and just continues walking :D . Tom Feltons facial expression and delivery are just pure gold in this one!

In CoS when Polyjuice-Harry explains that he has glasses on for reading, Draco replies: " Didn't know you could read" and just continues walking :D . Tom Feltons facial expression and delivery are just pure gold in this one!

Oh yes I had forgotten about that! I agree! The delivery of it and the the way Tom Felton says it is just amazing! I can't stop laughing.

Added snark bonus:

Harry: Message?

Snape: From Professor Dumbledore. He asked me to give you his best and he hopes you enjoy your holiday. You see, he's traveling and won't return...

And right about here Snape starts bouncing impatiently--absolutely terrific details that Rickman adds to Snape's character!


...until term resumes.

Harry: Travelling where?

Snape: [stares fixedly at Harry for a pregnant pause, then swivels dismissively and exits stage left]

Love this scene!

But the book has a trememdous spot too--where Slughorn puts his arm out and "scoops Snape out of thin air" horrifying Harry. That would have been nice to see on the screen too.

Neville - after the bridge scene - 'That went well!'

and the Ron comment in Gringotts after the manager is crisped by the dragon - 'that's unfortunate.'

The funniest line in all the movies, which never fails to make me laugh, is Snape's dressing down of Hermione for speaking out of turn the second time...the infamous, "Are you incapable of restraining yourself, or do you take pride in being an insufferable know-it-all?"

It probably has something to do with the accent and the rather pompous delivery too, but it always cracks me up.

Harry's "pincers" with the action and clicking he did when referring to Aragog cracked me up. Also, I really love hearing Umbridge talk. I think she nails the role perfectly with her throat clearing and overly sweet voice. My sister and I refer to her not by her name, but by doing the "hem hem" she did in the book and so well in the movie.

"The funniest line in all the movies, which never fails to make me laugh, is Snape's dressing down of Hermione for speaking out of turn the second time...the infamous, "Are you incapable of restraining yourself, or do you take pride in being an insufferable know-it-all?"

It probably has something to do with the accent and the rather pompous delivery too, but it always cracks me up."- agree with you 100%, Welkin!

Harry's "pincers" with the action and clicking he did when referring to Aragog cracked me up. Also, I really love hearing Umbridge talk. I think she nails the role perfectly with her throat clearing and overly sweet voice. My sister and I refer to her not by her name, but by doing the "hem hem" she did in the book and so well in the movie.


Umbridge is scarier than Voldemort, isn't she? I'd hate to be in her class. But she is also funny, if you're not in her line of fire. I call her Miss Pepto Bismol because of all the pink. I like pink in moderation, but not quite so explosively. The actress who played her in the movies deserves major props.

Speaking of Umbridge, one of my favorite lines is where Harry says, as Dolores is being swept away by the Centaurs: "I must not tell lies, Professor."

I love so many of the lines and i crack up alot during Harry Potter, but I have to say that my "funny line of the moment" is in GoF when Karkaroff greets Dumbledore and pronounces his name "Alboose" just the thought of it gets me loling

EDIT: I also love Hermione's "next to last, Fleur never got past ze grindilovz"and David Tennant's "get your filthy hands off me, you pathetic little men"

Yes, Welkin, Yes! "I call her Miss Pepto Bismol because of all the pink. I like pink in moderation, but not quite so explosively." Sorry, I can't seem to get the hang of putting others' quotes in the nice blue quote boxes.

And Mirror, yes, the "I must not tell lies" was great and was not in the book.

In CoS, I really liked the look on Hedwig's face right the before the Hogwart's Express almost hit them in the car. Her pupils dialated right before Ron managed to swoop the car up and out of the way. It wasn't a line, but it may as well have been.

And in HBP, when Hermione and Harry are at Slughorn's party and Hermione says, "I've just escaped," or something to that effect, and she meant from her date! And then Ron saying later after being "saved" from the love potion, "these girls are going to kill me."

McGonnagall in DH2: "I always wanted to use that spell."

What makes it so brilliant is that the weight of the Wizarding World is on her shoulders, yet she has that wonderfully human and humorous moment. It wouldn't be so funny if the scenario were not so fraught with danger and tension.

Ron actually says, "So...did you and Ginny do it?" in case anyone's wondering why Harry suddenly looks suspiciously guilty. But Ron doesn't catch on.

Actually, one of my favorite funny lines is one of the last (I probably don't have the wording quite right).

Harry: ...until a couple of weeks ago, when I overpowered Draco, at Malfoy Manor.

Ron: But that means the Elder Wand...

Harry: [shrugging] Yeah...it's mine.

On paper, not so funny, but Radcliffe's delivery of "It's mine" is pitch perfect--casual, as if he wasn't the master of the most powerful wand in the world (as Ron puts it a moment later), but acknowledging the truth.

All of the lines on this thread are hilarious.
Most of them not even because they were written that way, but because of the amazing delivery of them from the actors:D

McGonnagall in DH2: "I always wanted to use that spell."

What makes it so brilliant is that the weight of the Wizarding World is on her shoulders, yet she has that wonderfully human and humorous moment. It wouldn't be so funny if the scenario were not so fraught with danger and tension.

I really love that moment - when the statues come down from the walls I start crying! But what I also love is the look on Molly Weasley's face when she says that line - it's just a sideways glance but it is BRILLIANT!

I love McGonagall's line. But, the look Molly Weasly gives her is like, "Have you lost your mind?"

One of the funniest lines to me in OotP, when they're seeing the kids back off after Christmas vacation. Moody is stumping along and Sirius runs by (as Padfoot), and Moody says, "Sirius! Are you barking (mad)?" It just struck me as funny.

I love McGonagall's line. But, the look Molly Weasly gives her is like, "Have you lost your mind?"

One of the funniest lines to me in OotP, when they're seeing the kids back off after Christmas vacation. Moody is stumping along and Sirius runs by (as Padfoot), and Moody says, "Sirius! Are you barking (mad)?" It just struck me as funny.

:rotfl:

And I know these two aren't even really funny, bu I love in PS when Hgrid tells Harry he's a wizard. He's like, "I can't be a wizard! I'm Harry! Just Harry!" It cracks me up.

Also in COS when they're leaving the chamber with Fawkes and Lockhart says "It's just like magic!"

Both Of Mine Are In Half Blood Prince

Harry: Not To Mention The Pincers *click click*


Hermione: He's Been Poisoned You Daft Dimpoe. (is that how u spell it lol)

8th film...

Ron Weasley: She hasn’t seen me for six months, and she acts like I’m Frankie First Year. I’m only her brother…
Seamus Finnigan: She’s got lots of brothers though, but there’s only one Harry...
Ron Weasley: Shut up, Seamus...

I forget the line exactly but in "GoF" when Rita Skeeter is interviewing Harry in the broom cupboard about his entering the TriWizard Tournament. She says something about how does Harry think his parents would feel, given his need to prove himself, if they would be proud of him or concerned that he was exhibiting a "psychotic death wish"....LOL!!!

I watched Half-Blood Prince again last night, and I'd forgotten how many golden lines there are in this one...

Harry: Have you ever fixed a nose before?
Luna: No, but I've done several toes, and how different are they, really?

Ginny: He's covered in blood. Why's he always covered in blood?

Ron: Well, you can't break an Unbreakable Vow!
Harry: ...I'd kinda worked that much out for myself, funny enough.

Hermione: She's only interested in you because she thinks you're The Chosen One!
Harry: But I am The Chosen One.
(whack)

Not to mention the whole "nice skin" conversation between Harry and Ron, concluding with Harry's "...I think I'll be going to bed now." It's like a wizarding Seinfeld.

Oh, and "HI!" God, that kills me.

don't forget Ron's "did you and Ginny do it???" to Harry just after H/G kissed in the Room of Requirement after they hid the Potions book....

I watched Half-Blood Prince again last night, and I'd forgotten how many golden lines there are in this one...

Harry: Have you ever fixed a nose before?
Luna: No, but I've done several toes, and how different are they, really?

Ginny: He's covered in blood. Why's he always covered in blood?

Ron: Well, you can't break an Unbreakable Vow!
Harry: ...I'd kinda worked that much out for myself, funny enough.

Hermione: She's only interested in you because she thinks you're The Chosen One!
Harry: But I am The Chosen One.
(whack)

Not to mention the whole "nice skin" conversation between Harry and Ron, concluding with Harry's "...I think I'll be going to bed now." It's like a wizarding Seinfeld.

Oh, and "HI!" God, that kills me.

^
And Mcgonagall's line "Take Weasley with you, he looks far to happy over there." That one gets me every time. :lol:

and don't forget

Prof. McGonagall: “Why is it, that whenever anything happens, it’s always you three?”

Ron: “Believe me, Professor. I’ve been asking myself that same question for the past six years.”

That part still gets me xD

pretty much anything in the Half-Blood Prince

the funniest movie by far!

I watched Half-Blood Prince again last night, and I'd forgotten how many golden lines there are in this one...

Harry: Have you ever fixed a nose before?
Luna: No, but I've done several toes, and how different are they, really?

Ginny: He's covered in blood. Why's he always covered in blood?

Ron: Well, you can't break an Unbreakable Vow!
Harry: ...I'd kinda worked that much out for myself, funny enough.

Hermione: She's only interested in you because she thinks you're The Chosen One!
Harry: But I am The Chosen One.
(whack)

Not to mention the whole "nice skin" conversation between Harry and Ron, concluding with Harry's "...I think I'll be going to bed now." It's like a wizarding Seinfeld.

Oh, and "HI!" God, that kills me.

I always thought that HBP was surprisingly funny, considering how dark the storyline was. I absolutely loved the "nice skin" discussion -- great delivery of lines there by both Dan & Rupert. Also, I find Dan's entire "felix potion" scenario very funny as well, especially the "pinchers" impression....

I'm particularly fond with this line of Harry's in DH1:

Hermione: Harry, you already destroyed one horcrux! Tom Riddle's diary, in the Chamber of Secrets.
Harry: With a basilisk fang, if you tell me you got one of those in that bloody beaded bag of yours.

I love Harry's response there and the way Dan delivers it. It's really sarcastic and remind me of Harry's sarcasm and humor in the book.

I think a lot of Dumbledores quotes can be considered funny, especially after watching this video
0AZrV11fIcE

Snape in OOTP when Umbridge asks him about applying for the DADA post.

"But you were unsuccessful?"

"Obviously"

Kills me every time

Snape in OOTP when Umbridge asks him about applying for the DADA post.

"But you were unsuccessful?"

"Obviously"

Kills me every time

I love that, too. No one can pull it off like Rickman.

I may be paraphrasing but in Deathly Hallows Part 2 when the trio have just gone back to
Hogwarts.

Harry: There's something we need to find. Something here in the castle, that will help us to defeat you-know-who.
Neville: Great, what is it?
Harry: We don't know.
Dean: Where is it?
Harry: We don't know that either. I realise it's not much to go on.
Seamus: ..That's nothing to go on.


Seamus' delivery and expression is priceless!

Nothing like the truth and innocence of Dobby

Bellatrix: "You dropped that chandelier trying to kill me!"
Dobby: "Dobby did not wish to kill, just to maim or seriously injure!"

I also really wish that Ron's reaction to flying on a thestral towards the end of OotP would have been included in the film, considering how he couldn't have seen it. I think it would have been a golden Ron freak out moment.

Spiders, they want me to tapdance, i don't want to tapdance...:lol

Ron about his clothes for the Yule Ball:

"I look like my great aunt Tessie!



...I smell like my great aunt Tessie :("

Hermione: She's only interested in you because she thinks you're The Chosen One!
Harry: But I am The Chosen One.
(whack)

.

I laugh very hard each time I remember this.

HP 8
Neville : You always LOSE, HA!. (Well, or something like that)
It's not that funny line but I just love his sudden reaction. :D

Hermione: Now if you don't mind, I'm going to bed before any of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed, or worse, expelled.
Ron: She's really got to sort out her priorities.

Lockhart: Fear not, you'll still have your Potions master when I'm through with him.

Umbridge: You applied first for Defense Against The Dark Arts post, is that correct?
Snape: Yes.
Umbridge: But you were not successful?
Snape: Obviously.
*Ron snorts and Snape smacks him over the head*

Snape: You sent for me, Headmistress?
Umbridge: Snape, yes. The time has come for answers, whether he wants to give them or not. Have you bought the Veritaserum?
Snape: I'm afraid you have used up all my stores interrogating students, the last of it on Miss Chang. Unless you wish to poison Potter - and I assure you, I would have the greatest sympathy if you did - I cannot help you.
*Snape turns to leave*
Harry: He's got Padfoot...he's got Padfoot at the place that it's hidden.
Umbride: Padfoot? What is Padfoot...who is Padfoot, well what's he talking about Snape?
Snape: No idea.

Dumbledore: What happened down in the dungeon between you and Professor Quirrell is a complete secret. So, naturally, the whole school knows.

Dumbledore: I was most unfortunate in my youth to come across a vomit-flavored one, and since then I'm afraid I've lost my liking for them. But, I think I could be safe with a nice toffee...Mm, alas, earwax!

Hagrid: Shouldn't have said that, I should not have said that.

Hagrid: Dry up Dursley, you great prune.

Mrs. Weasley: Fred, you next.
George: He's not Fred, I am.
Fred: Honestly, woman. You call yourself our mother.
Mrs Weasley: Oh I'm sorry George.
Fred: I'm only joking, I am Fred.

Hermione: Look at you playing with your cards. Pathetic! We've got final exams coming up soon.
Ron: I'm ready! Ask me any question
Hermione: All right, what are the three most crucial ingredients in a Forgetfulness Potion?
Ron: I forgot.
Hermione: And what, may I ask, do you plan to do if this comes up in the final exam?
Ron: Copy off you.
Hermione: No, you won't! Besides, according to Professor McGonagall, we're to be given special quills bewitched with an anti-cheating spell.
Ron: That's insulting! It's as if they don't trust us!

Neville: Only problem is, I can't remember what I've forgotten.

I know this isn't the funniest, but it deserves a mention.

In PoA, during the Defense Against the Dark Arts class, Lupin calls Neville up to the front. Right as he walks up for some reason Lupin says "Hello" in a really silly way that just makes me laugh every time lol.

There's a couple:

Mr. Weasley: "Tell me, Harry. What is the function of a rubber duck?"

Ron: "Follow the spiders! Why couldn't it be follow the butterflies..."

Lupin: "You live with your grandmother, is that correct?"
Neville: "Yes, but I don't want that boggart to turn into her either."

Ron: "Nobody could feel all that at once, they'd explode."
Hermione: "Just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon."

Fred and George: "Look! We're twins!"

Fleur: "Don't look at me, Bill, I'm hideous."

Everything the talking head in the Knight Bus said.

Just out of curiosity. Ron's line in DH1 'The sword was stolen. Yeah, I'm still here' are supposed to be funny or is it just my country's terrible dubbing that makes them hilarious?

I don't think it was supposed to be funny, but I found it funny anyway (no dubbing.) It was just so abrupt and melodramatic, especially accompianed by the light going out and coming back on that it was hilarious to me. Several other people in my theatre laughed too.

I see the seriousness of it as well, but it was just delivered a bit oddly.

HBP is gold.

Draco: Nice face Potter.
Harry: *smiles*

Hermione: Will. You. Stop. Eating!?

Harry and Ron trying to grab the nice looking potion book from the cupboard.

Slughorn: Good to see you Wallenbee.

Slughorn: You're free to have some dessert, that is, if Belby's left you any. *laughs*
Hermione: They're dentists. They tend to people's teeth.
Slughorn: And is that considered a dangerous profession?

Harry: *whispers* But I am the chosen one.

Cormac: What is this I'm eating by the way.
Harry: ...Dragon balls.
*enter Snape*
Cormac: *pukes on Snape* huuuw!
Snape: You just earned yourself a month's worth *Harry sneaking away* of detention NOT, SO, FAST, POTTER.

Ron *sits only an inch from Harry*: I think I'm in love with her.
Harry: *stares*
Ron: *nods heavily*

Ron: I'M IN LOVE WITH HER.
Harry: All right fine you're in love with her! Have you actually met her?
Ron: No...could you introduce me?
Harry: *stares*
Ron: *smiles again*

Harry: I know, but I've got a really good feeling about Hagrid's. I feel like it's the place to be tonight. Do you know what I mean?
Ron and Hermione: No.
Harry Potter: Trust me! I know what I'm doing, or Felix does.
[walks past two people]
Harry Potter: *high pitched* Hi!!!

Harry: Not to mention the pincers.

Percy: It was nothing personel!
Fred & Greorge: Yes it was. We sent it.

HBP again:

Professor Slughorn: "Harry, I must insist that you accompany me back to the castle immediately."
Harry: "That would be counter-productive, sir."
Professor Slughorn: "Wh-what makes you say that?"
Harry: "No idea."

The delivery on the last line - Harry says it to himself, not to Slughorn. Genius, creases me up every time, along with the rest of the Felix scene. But I thought this sequence in particular deserved a mention.

McLaggen: "What is this I'm eating, by the way?"
Harry: "Dragon Balls."

Deadpan delivery. Radcliffe really does the comic stuff well.

“I may vomit” (Snape – OotP)

Moreover, it's a phrase that comes to my mind often and... I often say. :D

I have no need to post any lines that are funny in the HP films... because they have all already been posted by everyone else!

I may be paraphrasing but in Deathly Hallows Part 2 when the trio have just gone back to
Hogwarts.

Harry: There's something we need to find. Something here in the castle, that will help us to defeat you-know-who.
Neville: Great, what is it?
Harry: We don't know.
Dean: Where is it?
Harry: We don't know that either. I realise it's not much to go on.
Seamus: ..That's nothing to go on.


Seamus' delivery and expression is priceless!

This is my absolute favorite scene in the films. Hysterical.

Someone mentioned Harry mimicking Aragog's pincers in HBP, but what he says and how he says it after Slughorn asked if Aragog had any family cracks me up!!!

Slughorn: Did he (Aragog) have any family?
Harry: Oh yeah!

too funny!

my mindm ust have repressed this first one til my potterthon last week now im reeling


"the chinese fireball OOOOOH"


WHAT THE ****!?



ok now one thats funny just acse itsfunny (and te way gambledore delviers it)

"oh to be young and to feel loves clean sting"

"Shut up Seamus"