Preparing your child(ren) for a new baby

There is always a lot of work in bringing home a new baby. But, if it is not the first time how do you start preparing the child(ren) you have now for the new baby?

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
Did they work?

What were the age differences between the children?

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?

There is always a lot of work in bringing home a new baby. But, if it is not the first time how do you start preparing the child(ren) you have now for the new baby?

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
Did they work?

What were the age differences between the children?

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?

Interesting question lol my sister had her 2nd son back in June.Basically the only thing we did to prepare her older son for the arrival of his brother is read new baby books and tell him that he was gonna be a big brother. No those didn't work.

There's 16 1/2 months differance between the ages of my Nephews so at that age their really isn't away to prepare the older child.

He adjusted quite well to his brother comming home. He's still young enough that he isn't gonna remember a time without his brother.

My older Nephew likes to have his picture taken with his brother. We have pictures of him kissing his brother on the forehead. And one where my youngest sister is holding the baby and my other Nephew is sitting beside them both boys are looking at each other.

No probably wouldn't of done anything different to prepare him for his brothers arrival

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
Did they work?

I don't think I specifically did anything, they knew they were going to have a new baby brother or sister - when I had the youngest I did read the girls a book, but that was more preparing them for the birth in case they were present (they went off to another room so weren't present in the end) They didn't seem to have any problems

What were the age differences between the children?

15.5 months between the eldest pair then 21.5 months between the middle and youngest

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?
Without a problem, they don't tend to be that bothered by the baby until the baby gets a bit more into things

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?
After I had my second, she was born in the early hours of the morning when the eldest was asleep, dh brought the eldest into the bedroom when she woke up to introduce her to her sister - she asked for breakfast

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?
Not really

Oh, I like this idea! And I'm interested in hearing more stories about this...

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
Did they work?
Well, I'm still preparing. :lol: I'm due next month and I have a toddler. I tell him about the baby in mommy's tummy, and how he will have a little brother soon. He doesn't seem to keen on the idea, but he does know about siblings and babies because my older brother has one younger than mine as well as four more, including one my son's age. I'm hoping he adjusts well, but I suppose I can update when the time comes.

What were the age differences between the children?
The difference is going to be about 2 1/2 years.

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?
Time will tell. ;)

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?
Alas, not yet.

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?
Ask me again in about two months. :lol:

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?
Time will tell.

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?
Alas, not yet.

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?
Ask me again in about two months.
I look forward to hear more about how everything goes! :love:

Well, I'm still preparing. I'm due next month and I have a toddler. I tell him about the baby in mommy's tummy, and how he will have a little brother soon. He doesn't seem to keen on the idea, but he does know about siblings and babies because my older brother has one younger than mine as well as four more, including one my son's age. I'm hoping he adjusts well, but I suppose I can update when the time comes.
awww I hope everything works out okay with him getting used to the new baby. I am sure it will be a big adjustment. But they are a pretty good age difference to be buddies as the baby grows up. Can't wait to hear more stories. :)

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
We were not able to videotape the ultrasound for the boys, but we did show them still pictures from the ultrasounds. We also made lists of names for the baby and allowed them to try them out. When we finally picked a name for the baby, we had the boys make up a song for her, which they sang to her regularly. After she was born, she recognized their voices and was sothed by the song.

What were the age differences between the children?
Two years between the boys, three years between my youngest son and the baby.

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?
Initially, they treated her like an interesting new toy. As the noise and demands of the baby started to wear the novelty thin, they adjusted well enough -- they wanted a little more of Mommy than she could spare the first couple of weeks. It sorted itself out. They helped by bringing me blankets, diapers, wipes and drop cloths.

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?
After a particularly tough day with the baby, one of the boys asked, "Can you send her back?"

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?
I loved the fact that I co-slept with all of my kids as babies, but it made too easy for my husband to leave ALL of the feedings to me. As a result, my youngest went straight from the breast to a sippy cup, and never once did she get a feeding by snuggling up to her Daddy. I would have insisted that he sometimes be the one to feed her, if I had to do it over again.

We were not able to videotape the ultrasound for the boys, but we did show them still pictures from the ultrasounds. We also made lists of names for the baby and allowed them to try them out. When we finally picked a name for the baby, we had the boys make up a song for her, which they sang to her regularly. After she was born, she recognized their voices and was sothed by the song.
:love: :love: *passes out from the sweetness*
honestly this is so cute and that way they feel so a part of the process and special that she knows their voices.

Initially, they treated her like an interesting new toy. As the noise and demands of the baby started to wear the novelty thin, they adjusted well enough -- they wanted a little more of Mommy than she could spare the first couple of weeks. It sorted itself out. They helped by bringing me blankets, diapers, wipes and drop cloths.
I think it is great that they helped bring you things as well. That made them feel involved and helped them feel they served a purpose not only helping baby but helping mama too.

I forgot too that it must be hard to know how to spend special time with each child.

After a particularly tough day with the baby, one of the boys asked, "Can you send her back
:lol: My little cousin asked my aunt the same thing when his little brother was born, "Mama can you put him back where he came from?" :lol:

I loved the fact that I co-slept with all of my kids as babies, but it made too easy for my husband to leave ALL of the feedings to me. As a result, my youngest went straight from the breast to a sippy cup, and never once did she get a feeding by snuggling up to her Daddy. I would have insisted that he sometimes be the one to feed her, if I had to do it over again.
I love how all your kids slept with you that is so cute. I definitely love too how my husband was able to show my daughter he could meet her feeding needs by feeding her at times. I have definitely down the majority of the feedings, but those special times she had with Papa, getting her bottle are priceless. But there are other ways for Papas to be involved too.

Mine are 19 months apart. They are best friends now. Just remember that little kids don't need too many details.
I told my oldest that I was going to have a baby and she would have a little sister. Then I did not mention it much until I got closer. I read her some books about new babies. Then I started telling her about how she was going to have to help teach the baby how to do things. I still tell her that she is teaching her little sister, because Amanda learns everything very fast, since she has an older sister to look up to.

1st son is 21 months older than daughter who is 34 months older than 2nd son. (Making the 2 boys about 4.5 years apart, with a sister in between.)

When I had my second, I agonized over "preparing" my first -- he was a clingy, Mommy-has-to-do-everything, all-rituals-must-be-followed-exactly kind of toddler. We talked about how there was a baby in Mommy's tummy. We spent time with friends with babies and talked about how we were going to have one too, making sure not to talk about how much fun it would be to have a little brother/sister to play with. (You won't. For at least a few months, which is an eternity to a toddler.) We talked about how we wouldn't know whether he was getting a brother or a sister until the baby came out of Mommy's tummy and what the baby's name would be in each case. He seemed oblivious. The word "baby" did not even enter his vocabulary. Until....the day Daddy brought him to the hospital to see me and baby sister. I was feeding her (bad timing--I had wanted to be able to focus all my attention on toddler not baby!). He took one look at her, got a big grin on his face and crowed, "Baby!" He came over, stroked the top of her head very gently and just hung over her the whole time he was there. For about 9 months, that was her "real" name. He adjusted fine.

When I had my 3rd, we did basically the same things, but I think we did them a lot more casually.

We are in the same place as Mexicant. We have a little 2 1/2 boy with another boy due in December.

We have explained that he is going to have a little brother in a few months time. Whenever we see a baby on television we say 'we're having one of those aren't we?', I really can't tell if its working or not. My hubby asked him the other the day after a nappy advert 'would you like a baby?' Luckily Dylan said yes (although I'm not sure he understood the question!). I also made sure that he has been to all the ultrasound appointments so he could 'see' him.

His nursery at school are also being very helpful as they talk to him about the baby.

We even let him help paint the nursery walls. This was great fun but very messy! I think I ended up throwing out two (old) outfits! I think the fact that the baby already has a name have helped too.

Of course we still have two months to go and it could all fail drastically!

Interesting topic. My nephew was the baby of the family for nearly 5 years and being the only grandson, was spoilt rotten by everyone! When my sister fell pregnant again she was really worried that he wouldn't like the baby or that he would feel left out. When Michelle was born and brought home however, Colm surprised us all, he used to just stand at her cot when she was sleeping and stare at her for ages. Now Michelle is 4 and Colm is nearly 9 and they are best friends. Michelle says that Colm is her friend rather than her brother which I think is really, really cute!

They just mentioned this on the view and I thought it was a good idea and cute :)

For the children that are already here and anticipating an new brother or sister, the parents went out and bought the older sibling(s) a gift and said that it was from the baby. Of course this would depend on the age of the sibling, but for younger ones I think this is a cute little idea. :) Espcecially to do soon after the baby is born as the baby will get a bunch of new gifts and a sibling may be jealous.

There is always a lot of work in bringing home a new baby. But, if it is not the first time how do you start preparing the child(ren) you have now for the new baby?

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
Did they work?

What were the age differences between the children?

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?
My first two were 19 months apart. I took my oldest out of her crib and got her used to a toddler bed early so she didn't feel like her space was being invaded. I also had the luxury of being able to put the new baby in a separate room, which aided the situation. We talked about the new baby a lot before she was born but I don't think kids that young really get it until it happens--and then they still don't really get it.
The third baby was much different. She came four years after our second. The second didn't really warm up to the baby for a while, but our first was so excited that she thought of the new baby as "hers" before she was even born. My youngest is three now, and she and my oldest still have a very special bond.

My first two were 19 months apart. I took my oldest out of her crib and got her used to a toddler bed early so she didn't feel like her space was being invaded. I also had the luxury of being able to put the new baby in a separate room, which aided the situation. We talked about the new baby a lot before she was born but I don't think kids that young really get it until it happens--and then they still don't really get it.
The third baby was much different. She came four years after our second. The second didn't really warm up to the baby for a while, but our first was so excited that she thought of the new baby as "hers" before she was even born. My youngest is three now, and she and my oldest still have a very special bond.

We've just put Evs into his own bed, and now that we have moved to a bigger apartment he has his own room - for a little while. Since I'll be breastfeeding, I will keep the bassinet in my room with me for the first five or six months, and then we will be transferring the baby to what we have dubbed the boys' room. :) He has another month to get used to his own space, and having the baby sleep in our room will help ease the transition into sharing with him (I'm hoping! :lol:) once he is ready for the crib.

For the children that are already here and anticipating an new brother or sister, the parents went out and bought the older sibling(s) a gift and said that it was from the baby. Of course this would depend on the age of the sibling, but for younger ones I think this is a cute little idea. :) Espcecially to do soon after the baby is born as the baby will get a bunch of new gifts and a sibling may be jealous.
My parents did that with me when my younger sisters were born. With the first younger sister, I was three and received the two baby "Popples" Cribsy and Bibsy. When my youngest sister was born three years later, my sister and I both received Barbies that came with babies from our baby sister. I think that the toys were a nice distraction for us because so much of the attention and the presents are focused on the new baby that it is hard for the older children and they begin to feel ignored.

We've just put Evs into his own bed, and now that we have moved to a bigger apartment he has his own room - for a little while. Since I'll be breastfeeding, I will keep the bassinet in my room with me for the first five or six months, and then we will be transferring the baby to what we have dubbed the boys' room. :) He has another month to get used to his own space, and having the baby sleep in our room will help ease the transition into sharing with him (I'm hoping! :lol:) once he is ready for the crib.
After six months he'll probably be so in love with the baby he'll want to share a room. :agree:

They just mentioned this on the view and I thought it was a good idea and cute :)

For the children that are already here and anticipating an new brother or sister, the parents went out and bought the older sibling(s) a gift and said that it was from the baby. Of course this would depend on the age of the sibling, but for younger ones I think this is a cute little idea. :) Especially to do soon after the baby is born as the baby will get a bunch of new gifts and a sibling may be jealous.

Ooh, yes. Actually, we didn't do this, but we did make sure to ask close friends and family members to remember to pay at least some attention to the older child(ren) when they came to see "baby." After all, the baby doesn't care that you're here, but the toddler cares that you used to come to see him/her! This led to many people asking the big sister or brother to show them the baby, which I think helped my older kids think of the baby as "theirs." And the grandparents took it as license to buy extra special gifts for the older kids to celebrate their new status.

I am actually getting the impression that Dylan is going to be spoilt when the new baby arrives. I mentioned getting him a present from the baby to my hubby after reading this and it turns out that there is a pressie already in the hospital bag for when Dil comes to the hospital.

It also turns out that both of our mums and my sister have got him something. All this the week before Christmas too. I think we going to be in for some fun!:lol:

This led to many people asking the big sister or brother to show them the baby, which I think helped my older kids think of the baby as "theirs."
This is a really good idea too because it makes the child feel like they are part of the excitement and find joy in showing of the baby. They also have a job to do, the get to be "tour guide" to the baby. :tu:

All this the week before Christmas too. I think we going to be in for some fun!
I can't wait to hear how it all turns out for you!! :clap:

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
Did they work? Well, one thing I did was find some books at the library about becoming a big brother, and reading them to him. There is a book featuring Arthur becoming a big brother that my son really liked. Also, about the time I was pregnant with my second Dora becomes a big sister, and Franklin became a big brother, so those shows helped. Our hospital also offered a sibling preparation class, but I had my second one before my oldest could take the class.

What were the age differences between the children? My boys are 2 years apart.

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby? Well, my oldest had some aggression toward me, but it soon subsided, he never took it out on his brother. He also regressed in being potty trained, but he soon got over that too, and went back to being trained.

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share? Well, my oldest got to where he just loved to "help" with his brother. He loved to help with bath, and diaper changes, so I would make sure I remembered give him a job to do to help.

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)? No, I think my oldest adjusted just great to his little brother.

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
Did they work?

Well as soon as I started showing with my second I let his big brother know I was growing a baby. He was very involved and I let him in on most things that were happening. I took him to the ultrasound where he could see the baby (he thought it was a robot baby) and he talked to the baby all the time. I signed him up for a sibling class but unfortunately there wasn't enough people signed up to actually have a class. I mostly talked to him about what it would be like to be a big brother and things the baby would do and then things he did when he was a baby. And for the most part it worked really well. He was so excited when I had the baby (he was happy the "watermelon" came out)

What were the age differences between the children?

My kids are almost exactly 4 years apart

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?

He did really good. There hasn't been any jealousy, he thinks his brother is so funny. There has definitely been indifference but he has not been mean at all. He even shares some of his bigger toys with his little brother.

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?

My little one, Will, is obsessed with his older brother, Craig, and one of the first voices (besides mine) he recognized was his brother and everytime Craig talks around Will, Will starts smiling and laughing. He thinks his big brother is the stuff.

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?

Seeing how well this has turned out definitely not. I mean maybe if there was a sibling class but I could handle it if there wasn't.

There are five years difference between my daughters. I took my daughter to the hospital with me a few weeks before the baby was born. We had lunch in the cafeteria and I explained to her that I would be away for a few days and would be bringing a baby home. I let her ask whatever questions she had.

She was staying at my parents house when her sister was born. She woke up at the exact time I gave birth calling for me. The next morning, when they told her she had a baby sister she said, "Okay, can I have a jelly doughnut?" So in her world, jelly doughnuts were more important than a new sister.

When I brought the baby home, we picked up my daughter at the day care. I gave the baby to her father to hold and held out my arms to my daughter. She slipped right past me, totally uninterested in me, and only wanted to see the baby. So much for following the book recommendations.

Okay I am reawaking this thread since I just found out I am Preggers!!
YAYAY :clap:

Over the next several months I am hoping this thread comes in handy as I have a 16 month-old that will need to get prepared for the new baby. She absolutely ADORES babies right now and thinks it is funny when the cry. But she isn't around them much and I have a feeling that is one reason she likes them, because they are new to her. However, when we bring Baby #2 home and the baby is around all the time and not going away I have a feeling she will feel a little differently.

I am also a stay at home mom so she is used to getting undivided attention. I plan over the next months to get some books to read to her about a new baby and she is getting a baby doll for Christmas so we will work together how to take care of it and such.

Any other ideas/stories that worked or didn't work?

I am also a stay at home mom so she is used to getting undivided attention. I plan over the next months to get some books to read to her about a new baby and she is getting a baby doll for Christmas so we will work together how to take care of it and such.

Any other ideas/stories that worked or didn't work?


I was a stay at home mom with my first and so he was pretty spoiled with my attention. I always made sure that if I wasn't feeling well I would say it was because I was tired and leave the pregnancy out of it. I only shared the happy stuff with him and blamed all the bad stuff on myself. I tried to only talk abou the positive things the baby would bring and I made very clear that the baby would not be taking any toys away.

Once the baby was born I made a huge effort to give equal time. If people came over to see the baby I made the most of it and made them play with the baby while I spent some one on one time with my other son. It was hard because I am a single mom so I am the only one giving the attention, but it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. We all just kind of adapted to the new situation and luckily my oldest son was very accepting and not at all jealous.

Dylan has adapted to Jacob really well. He loves 'his baby' and loved showing him off to all his teachers at school.

I think the key is talk to the older child the whole way through the nine months. If possible take them to scans but I would leave them at home for any appointments that would involve taking blood or any other invasive procedure I would imagine that a small child would get upset.

Once Jacob and I got home from the hospital we got Dylan involved in everything from nappy changing to bathing, just by saying 'could you pass me the wipes' makes them feel involved.

Dylan loves to helps us wind after a feed, although I can't decided if its a covert way to hit his baby brother :lol:

I think the key is talk to the older child the whole way through the nine months. If possible take them to scans but I would leave them at home for any appointments that would involve taking blood or any other invasive procedure I would imagine that a small child would get upset.

Once Jacob and I got home from the hospital we got Dylan involved in everything from nappy changing to bathing, just by saying 'could you pass me the wipes' makes them feel involved.

You are so right. Talking to your older children about the enitre process and keeping them involved is important. My son Craig has done so well. He has his moments when he trys to get away from Will but that usually only happens when Craig is playing Legos. He is a very proud big brohter who insists that I bring baby Will to school when I pick Craig up.

Craig feels like he has had a big hand in helping Will grow up. He is always saying stuff like "Will is learning from my brain Mom" which is funny. There really isn't alot of jealousy or animosity, I guess I am pretty lucky :)

I think the key is talk to the older child the whole way through the nine months. If possible take them to scans but I would leave them at home for any appointments that would involve taking blood or any other invasive procedure I would imagine that a small child would get upset.

You know, Evs (my older one) was with me when I took a three hour GD test, and after each time they took blood he told me, "Good job, Mommy!" :lol: I guess it just depends on the kid, eh?

So, I am due in about three months and my 21 month year old daughter is just starting to get the concept of a new baby.

First off she adores babies, so that is a plus. We just transitioned her to a "Big Girl Bed" so I don't have to worry about doing that and taking care of an infant.

I am also trying to find some good "Big Sister" or "New Baby" books to read with her. If anyone knows any, I would love some recomendations.

We are encouraging her to play with baby dolls, showing her how to hold them and be nice with a baby. Now if I can just get her to stop biting the baby doll's ears and dropping her on her head :err:

We are encouraging her to play with baby dolls, showing her how to hold them and be nice with a baby. Now if I can just get her to stop biting the baby doll's ears and dropping her on her head :err:

I have heart failure nearly everyday as Dylan tries to pick up Jacob. Personally I found that allowing Dylan to have regular cuddles on the sofa has sort of solved this but I don't think he's going to stop trying to pick him up.

When my sister was born my auntie brought my 'My Naughty Little Sister' by Shirley Hughes. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_gw?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=my+naughty+little+sister&x=0&y=0 I loved them and still have the book now, they probably are a bit 'dated' but they are lovely stories.

I'm not sure if you can get on DVD but there is an episode of The Bear in the Big Blue House about becoming a older sibling which we found helped, I think it was a boy becoming the older sibling but the baby turned out to be a girl so it might help.

I have heart failure nearly everyday as Dylan tries to pick up Jacob.
:lol: I would feel the same way!

I loved them and still have the book now, they probably are a bit 'dated' but they are lovely stories.
Thanks I will have to check that out to see if our library has it.

I'm not sure if you can get on DVD but there is an episode of The Bear in the Big Blue House about becoming a older sibling which we found helped, I think it was a boy becoming the older sibling but the baby turned out to be a girl so it might help.
Ooo a movie would be great too! Thanks :D

I had the boys design shirts to wear to the hospital to meet the baby... each got to pick out the color of the shirt and the font and such, and the shirts said, "I'm the Big Brother" on the front. They were kept aside so that they could only be worn when the baby was born. This way, they felt like they were also going to be a big part of the delivery day -- even though they weren't there until after her birth, people fussed over them, too.