Humourous HP things non-fans come up with

So I was having a HP discussion with my friend the other day, (she has read the series once a couple of years ago) and we were discussing Dumbledore's coming out. When the topic came up her exact statement was "Oh yeah! He was in love with Nicholas Cage or something aye?", she was meaning Nicholas Flamel... needless to say this had me in hysterics :rotfl:



Im sure im not the only person who has had these sort of conversations with non-fans... any other funny stories out there?

I once heard the rather amusing theory that "Professor Snake" was secretly the human form of Nagini.

My friend calls Snape "Professor Snipe." It always reminds me of Wesley Snipes. :rotfl:

I once heard the rather amusing theory that "Professor Snake" was secretly the human form of Nagini.

:rotfl: Hilarious!

My friend keeps talking about professer squirrel!

My mom asked me once if Harry and Hermione finally got together and whenever my sister and I discuss the next movie (before HBP and now) my mom would say she thought they had finished the series. We kept reminding her that the books were done, but not the movies.

I once heard the rather amusing theory that "Professor Snake" was secretly the human form of Nagini.
Priceless :rotfl:.

@ blueowl: Nice one :lol:. Professor Squirrel...

this isnt really like the same thing but my friends very religious mom is convinced that harry potter doesnt have a soul cuz he is a wizard. she allways talks about how bad the series is and stuff...

My friend keeps talking about professer squirrel!

:rotfl: Hilarious!

My parents think Death Eaters are Dementors.

Well, once you think about it, Death Eaters,
Dementors feed on your soul. Hmmm...

My dad is convinced Buckbeak the Hippogriff is a parrot :lol: 'You know that parrot, the really big one?..from the third one???' 'Thats called a hippogriff dad..'

Well...my dad insists on the fact that (Hany Pooter) series is a very nice children's story...

Well...my dad insists on the fact that (Hany Pooter) series is a very nice children's story...

So does mine!! It is so infruiating! "Why are you always reading those childrens books" Grrrr...:grumble:

My friend calls Snape "Professor Snipe." It always reminds me of Wesley Snipes. :rotfl:

My sister and I are trying to convince my brothers that every time Snape does something bad in the book, it's really his evil twin, Professor Snipe.
It's going well so far (they're 12 years old and reading book 4, and I have actually successfully convinced one of them that the moon really is made of cheese...so I don't know if they are just very gullible, or I am an excellent liar. Either way, I'm a bad sister).

Anyways, I'd tried explaining the story to my dad, and he'd somehow gotten the idea that "that blond kid" is the main villain.
One point for Malfoy.

My sister and I are trying to convince my brothers that every time Snape does something bad in the book, it's really his evil twin, Professor Snipe.
It's going well so far (they're 12 years old and reading book 4, and I have actually successfully convinced one of them that the moon really is made of cheese...so I don't know if they are just very gullible, or I am an excellent liar. Either way, I'm a bad sister).

Don't you worry that you will ruin the series for them?

Don't you worry that you will ruin the series for them?

I'm a bad sister

...I'll tell them the truth before they get to the end of book 6, don't worry.

good :D

So does mine!! It is so infruiating! "Why are you always reading those childrens books" Grrrr..

I wouldn't have been annoyed if he made a better effort to say the name properly....hehe...^_^ ( Hany Pooter)

My husband calls me dumblebore if the subject of HP comes up.....not very original i know.

My dad insists on calling the series Harvey Pooper. It's quite annoying, but you learn to deal with it.

Some of these would make great Potter Puppet Pals.

My dad constantly calls Hagrid "Haggardy"
The scary part is that he's actually a fan of the movies...I came home from work one night and he's like "that new harry potter movie was great!" (talking about HBP) He even tries to explain the series to people when they come over and we're watching one of the movies...it's hilarious!

My husband was surprised that Snape was a good guy and he insisted that Harry and Hermione would get together, even after I told him that they don't get together. He won't read the books, but he enjoys the movies. Not really funny I know.

I was watching Scorcerer' s Stone about 7 years ago with my late grandmother. I had told her that the bad guy was scary and I couldn't watch when he came on (I had trouble with the Voldemort scene back then, it freaked me out)
So we get to the scene where Harry enters Gringotts and meets the goblin. "Is that him??" my grandma asked, mistaking the goblin for voldemort. I had to clear it up for her, but it was so funny.
When Voldie actually came on, my grandma laughed. She thought that that scene was funny..:rotfl:

my best friend about five minuets ago we were talking about HP when i asked her what House she would want to be in and she answered "mugglepuffs!" it was hilarious!!!!!

I found out recently that, apparently, Lupin's child with Tonks was really named Sloopy, and that she was frequently told to hang on.

Oh, and I frequently have to explain that no, the sentence "Are you Sirius?" does not appear anywhere in the series.

Oh, and I frequently have to explain that no, the sentence "Are you Sirius?" does not appear anywhere in the series.

I never realised that :lol: That definitely should have been put in somewhere.

I was quizzing my mum on Harry Potter a few weeks ago (I don't know why, I think she saw me on mugglenet and she said she couldn't remember what happened in the books so I started testing her) and some of the answers she was coming up with were hilarious, and quite shocking at the same time: she couldn't remember out of Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs, which one the werewolf was :huh:

I found out recently that, apparently, Lupin's child with Tonks was really named Sloopy, and that she was frequently told to hang on.

:rotfl:

I'm still dealing with arguments over whether or not Dumbledore is dead...I pulled out DH to prove it to him, and even then he doesn't believe me! :rolleyes: It's all good, though, he's excited to go see part 1. (not nearly as excited as I am, but still relatively excited)

This isn't really funny, but my husband wanted to know what year the movies take place. he thought it was the 1800's or 1900's. when I told him what year GOF came out, he said, "no, not the books, what year do the movies take place." I told him the movies are current, but because there is no electricity due to magic interferrring, that's why there are no electric lamps, no telephones, & candles and torches are used for lights. He also didn't know how the "lady who wrote the books knew that Dumbledore was gay." I mentioned in the last book there was a mention with one of the characters and Dumbledore. I didn't want to explain it in case he wanted to see the film right away. Anyway, Jo is the author. she ought to know if one of her characters is gay or not.

My boss: Oh, Movie number six.... I think I have seen it... Is that the one where Gandalf dies?
Me: *facepalm*

:rotfl::rotfl: keep them coming.

My boss: Oh, Movie number six.... I think I have seen it... Is that the one where Gandalf dies?
Me: *facepalm*

hahahaha :D

This one isn't that funny, but the sad thing is that my dad IS a fan but he insists on calling Hermione HerMONEy. I think it's just to tick me off, but still. :lol:

lol. I convinced someone who i know that, in the first DH movie, Ron leaves them... then turns bad. (I wonder what he would've been thinking when Ron left :p)
Then I told him that Harry dies at the end. I promised. I didn't really lie, did I?

Like 20 people I know think Harry dies at the end. And I convinced them all. My friend is sure McGonagall is McGonagarrr.

someone told me a few days ago that harry was stupid cuz he didnt kill voldemort. i was like what??!? what are you talking about? and he insisted that neville killed voldemort. I was just like..."no...that was nagini"

Then all my friends were like "I wouldn't argue with her. She would know." :D

someone told me a few days ago that harry was stupid cuz he didnt kill voldemort. i was like what??!? what are you talking about? and he insisted that neville killed voldemort. I was just like..."no...that was nagini"

Then all my friends were like "I wouldn't argue with her. She would know." :D

Well Neville gets to be pretty badass by the time DH rocks around - but you just can't take the recognition away from Nagini... Didn't Hedwig and Mundungus help too? Or is my memory failing me? :D

:D hahaha Mundungus helping to kill the voldemort is like...dudley throwing away a donut.

Well, Hedwig does die in the very beginning of the book :lol:

My sister: Do Malfoy & Dobby get together?

...0.o

My sister: Do Malfoy & Dobby get together?

...0.o

Yes, yes they do. ;)