Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
This is a thread where you can show how you would have scripted Harry Potter, or will, cause it's bound to be remade. Come and have a go!
Feb 2010 Edit: Below is a list of all the scripts posted in this thread. There are three categories. Full scripts are completed adaption of one of the books. Uncompleted scripts are scripts that are not yet finished. Partial scripts are scripts of only certain scenes from the books, and the rest of that book has not been scripted. Some users have posted multiple versions of their scripts, but only the latest is documented below. SCRIPT LIBRARY Full scripts: ![]() Uncompleted Scripts: ![]() Partial Scripts: ![]() Original Post: ![]() |
Re: The next Harry Potter Remake
Well, that's about 20 minutes and not much happens. It includes much more than is needed is occasionally pretty redundant. I haven't read it in a while, but it seems like you mainly just reformatted the book. You should try making some cuts.
I've actually recently been thinking about how I would have done the first movie. Maybe I should write it out. |
Re: The next Harry Potter Remake
I really liked how you did a zoom out from Vernon's extremely boring tie.:rotfl:
There was a mistake, though. The book said "Dudley learned a new word, 'shan't". I assume this means it was not his first word. Also, you repeated the sentence "About why he's disappeared?" (McGonagall to Dumbledore) |
Re: The next Harry Potter Remake
Yeah, I did.
I added instead of cutting (though I did rework a few things) and I will, a some point go back and cut. Should I emphisise again this is a VERY, VERY, VERY early draft Quote:
Yeah, I thought it would be cooler if Shan't would be Dudley's first word. I also didn't want to make to have him say it while Vernon was at work (as in the book), so added it into the Vernon pecked Petunia on the cheek; Dudley was throwing cereal' scene. You'll also find that the last scene posted is a mix of references in the book. In the book, that scene is just Dudley telling Harry about the toilets. And, whoops :whistle: Sorry! |
Re: The next Harry Potter Remake
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But: I do think you should cut mercilessly. At some points it seems like you're taking it chapter by chapter. I recommend that you look at the story as a whole and go from there. Also: don't hesitate to deviate from the plot. I think you'll have more fun if you do. But all in all, good work. It was very well-formatted. :tu: |
Re: The next Harry Potter Remake
Now fixed (talking about double dialogue.)
I'm not really going to cut it until the first draft is finished, and I posted everything I've done. --- I decided to do some cuts. I cant be bothered centering, sorry. Edit: Word to the wise: do your centering before you post and not in edit mode. NB: This is now deleted as I felt we didn't need this twice. What was cut is now red on the Post 1 version --- OK, here is some extra scenes I just did. My old script Part II: ![]() |
Re: The next Harry Potter Remake
Here's the next part
My old script Part III: ![]() OK I had real trouble with the letter scene because I built up Petunia's charcter, but then when it came to her reaction to the letter it didn't fit. I left the stuff I added in there I hope it works, but I'm not sure. --- Scene 26 and 27A are cut now, just so you know |
Re: The next Harry Potter Remake
Don't know, but I hope I've passed through the veil, before they do!
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
Wow I never really thought about a Remake of the movie before, but I Guess it would be a long time before it does though, say...2030/2040?
I don't have my book with me as a reference right now, but I will definately make a script, so expect one later. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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On a side note I cut Mrs Figg's scene in PS. I wrote a draft of a scene to pout in OotP to cover it up. I have a new rule: Not introduce anything that isn't explained my the end of the film. Of course I won't pull everything out of PS,CoS,PoA,GoF,OotP and HBP and shove them in DH. It is only for the minor things. |
Re: The next Harry Potter Remake
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
It took me a while to find this thread, I hope people are reading it.
Well I am not so happy with my original script, so I decided to start again... And I thought that was short! I didn't realise how long it was. Going to delete...something. --- Have deleted the seemingly useless 'cut script' and have put what was cut in red in the 'uncut' script. But still, I can hardly see that slidy thing on the side of the page. --- And my 'script outline', it doesn't serve any purpose. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
The next part of my new script, maybe I should put it in one post and delete the previous post, or just say go to post _
What a cliffhanger! -- I've changed Scene 1 (The Prologue) slightly: --- I don't know what to do for the next scene, what to keep, what to leave out. Last time I did the whole scene, even the sherbet lemons, and I don't know what should go... (Edit: The sherbet lemons were cut) This is my old scene (cuts in red) it's really long, something has to go... The old arrival scene: ![]()
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
I think this is when people realize what Steve Kloves and Michael Goldenberg had to go through. It's no easy task translating a book into a film but you're doing pretty good, ArryGrotter. You just need some more editing.
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
I wrote this a couple weeks ago. I worked on it for about an hour and couldn't believe that it took so long just to write like a minute and half of a movie, so I gave up. I don't like it nearly as much now as much as I did when writing, but I thought I'd post it anyway, since it took so long. It might be a little violent, by the way.
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
It is non-canon. I just think the fire would be visually striking. I don't really remember what happened in the book. I probably contradicted something important, didn't I?
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
I really like your script, keep up the good work!
I also think it is an excellent idea for fans to write their own versions of a movie script. When I get time I'm going to script PoA, because I think that film definitely needs remaking! |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
Okay so I was asked to contribute to this thread. I have a script that I've done for HBP (Three versions actually and I need to do a forth) I'm just going to warn you guys...this was done BEFORE DH was released and I cut out some things that ends up being important later lol. See how bad I am at figuring things out lol. Regardless I wrote this 3rd draft at the beginning of this year and when I rewrite it ALOT of things are going to change, but for now I thought it'll be fun to show where my mind was, what I thought was important or not and I would love to hear you guys opinion. So here is the beginning of my 'Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince' screenplay. Notice that there is NO Spinners End so don't kill me cause in 2 out of the 3 versions I have it's there :)
Fade In: EXT. SHACK IN THE HILLS-NIGHT The Camera pans in towards a dark shack atop a mountain. Rain falls violently as a flash of lightening come across the screen. The camera cranes towards a window and we see the shadow of a man moving around quickly. INT. SHACK-NIGHT The camera pans through the window and we see the back of the man who closes his briefcase quickly. He turns around and we see that it is Igor Karkaroff, the head of Durmstrang. He looks down and there is a shot of the DARK MARK on his arm that he covers up quickly. He runs quickly to grab his bags and there is a noise and he stops suddenly. All we hear is thunder and the rain beating outside and then BAM the door flies open. Karkaroff jumps back in horror as 3 hooded figured walk slowly into the shack. KARKAROFF GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!! PERSON UNDER THE HOOD Now Igor, do you think its wise to greet your master this way? The person pulls back his hood and reveals himself to be LORD VOLDEMORT KARKAROFF My Lord, you…you have returned… VOLDEMORT Don’t act as if you didn’t know Igor, the signs have been strong since my return two years ago. Yet…you never returned… KARKAROFF My Lord, I didn’t know..I didn’t…. VOLDEMORT CRUCIO!!!!! Karkaroff falls over in pain, screaming in agony. VOLDEMORT Surely you knew this day would come Igor. Do you honestly think you could avoid me forever? (He looks down to Karkaroff whimpering on the floor) Pathetic, what you have become. At first I was going to send others to kill you, but I realized…who else to dispose of the traitor than me? KARKAROFF No…no please… VOLDEMORT You should’ve remained loyal to your master Karkaroff. AVADA KADAVRA! A flash of green light shoots out of his wand and Karkaroff falls over dead. Voldemort walks over and pushes him with his foot.. VOLDEMORT Tragic. (He turns to the other 2 Death Eaters) Now come my friends, there’s much to do. The mission begins soon and we must make sure that…he’s ready to do his job. The DEATH EATERS and LORD VOLDEMORT exit the shack and Voldemort stops and looks up. He points his wand up at the sky. VOLDEMORT MORSMORDRE! A flash shoots from the wand and BOOM the DARK MARK appears over the shot. There is a flash and the scene cuts to… INT. HARRY’S ROOM/HALLWAY-NIGHT The scene cuts to a shot of a window. The camera pans around the room onto a newspaper where we see the heading Harry Potter: The Chosen One? It then zooms to the newspaper clipping next to it that has Scrimgeour Succeeds Fudge as the heading. The camera then pans over past Hedwig in her cage to the bed where we see Harry laying down looking at the ceiling. We hear the doorbell ring from downstairs and we see Harry jump up with excitement, grab his glasses, and rushes out the door. The scene cuts to Uncle Vernon rushing angrily towards the door with a shotgun.) UNCLE VERNON Who the blazes is calling at this time of night! He opens the door quickly with the gun drawn and we see Dumbledore standing there. We then see Harry run down the stairs and stop at the foot of them staring at Uncle Vernon and Dumbeldore. DUMBLEDORE You must be Mr. Dursley. Judging by your look of stunned disbelief, and your gun in my face, (he glances up at Harry) Harry did not warn you that I was coming. However let us assume that you have lowered your gun and invited me warmly into your home. It is unwise to linger overlong on doorsteps in these troubled times. Uncle Vernon lowers his gun and we see Harry laugh as Dumbledore walks into their house and Harry continues to walk down the stairs. DUMBLEDORE Ah, good evening Harry… Both Petunia and Dudley walk out of the kitchen into the hallway UNCLE VERNON I don’t mean to be rude…. DUMBLEDORE Yet, sadly, accidental rudeness occurs alarmingly often. Best to say nothing at all, my dear man. Ah, and this must be Petunia and this must be your son, Dudley? Vernon, Petunia, and Dudley all look at each other nervously and then back at Dumbledore without saying anything. HARRY Should I go and get my things first sir… DUMBLEDORE In a moment Harry, there are a few matters that must be discussed first. I would prefer not to do so in the open so we shall trespass upon your aunt and uncle’s hospitality a little longer. UNCLE VERNON You will, will you? DUMBLEDORE Yes, I shall. Now lets assume you have invited me into your sitting room. Dumbledore smiles at them and walks into the living room followed by Harry. The Dursleys look at each other and then follow slowly. INT. DURSLEY’S LIVING ROOM-NIGHT DUMBLEDORE Hope you don’t mind, but we may as well be comfortable. Dumbledore pulls out his wand and flicks it. The sofa zooms forward and knocks the knees from under the Dursleys and they collasp on the couch. The sofa then zooms back to where it was originally. We see a shot of Dumbledore’s hand, which has blackened. HARRY What happened to your…? DUMBLEDORE Later Harry. Have a seat please. I would assume that you were going to offer me refreshments. Dumbledore flicks his wand again and 5 glasses filled with a drink appear. The glasses float to everyone in the room. Vernon and Petunia cast each other a nervous look as Dumbledore and Harry grab there glasses and toast each other. The Dursleys ignore the glasses and the glasses just nudge them on the side of their heads. DUMBLEDORE Now Harry, The Order of the Phoenix has run into a difficult situation. Sirius’s will was discovered and it seems that he left you everything he owned. UNCLE VERNON His godfather’s dead? DUMBLEDORE Yes…now…One problem is that Sirius also left you number twelve, Grimmauld Place. UNCLE VERNON He’s been left a house? How…how… HARRY (ignoring Vernon) You can keep using it as headquarters. You can have it… I don’t really want it. DUMBLEDORE That is generous. We have, however, vacated the building temporarily. HARRY Why? DUMBLEDORE Sirius was the very last of the line as his younger brother, Regulus, predeacesed him and both were childless. It is possible that some spell or enchantment has been set to ensure it cannot be owned by anyone other than a pureblood. If this is so, it is passed down to the eldest of Sirius’s living relatives, his cousin Bellatrix Lestrange. HARRY (Harry jumps up suddenley) Bellatrix Lestrange! Sirius’s killer, inherit the house? No! How can we find out if I’m allowed to own it? DUMBLEDORE There is a simple test… UNCLE VERNON WILL YOU GET THESE RUDDY THINGS OFF US!!! The camera shows the three Dursleys waving their hands above their heads trying to keep the glasses away as the glasses continue nudging them. DUMBLEDORE Oh, I’m so sorry. (He raises and flicks his wand and the glasses disappear.) It would have been better manners to drink it, you know. Now you see Harry, if you have indeed inherited the house, you also inherited.. He flicks his wands and Kreacher appears in the middle of the room. Aunt Petunia lets out a loud scream; Dudley jumps up on the couch. UNCLE VERNON What the hell is that!?!? DUMBLEDORE Kreacher. KREACHER KREACHER WON’T! KREACHER WON’T! KREACHER WON’T GO TO THE POTTER BRAT! KREACHER BELONGS TO MISS BELLATRIX! DUMBLEDORE As you can see Harry, Kreacher is showing a certain (He looks at Kreacher and he covers his ears and starts to run around the room yelling ‘Don’t’ as the Dursleys scream as well.) reluctance to pass into your ownership. HARRY I don’t care...I don’t want him. DUMBLEDORE You would prefer him to pass into the ownership of Bellatrix Lestrange? Bear in mind that he has lived at the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix for the past year. KREACHER WON’T WON’T WON’T!!!!!! HARRY Kreacher, shut up! Kreacher grabs his throat and throws himself to the floor. DUMBLEDORE Well that simplifies matters. It seems that Sirius knew what he was doing. You are the rightful owner of number twelve Grimmauld Place and of Kreacher. The camera shows Kreacher thrashing around on the floor in silence. HARRY Do I have to keep him? DUMBLEDORE Not if you don’t want too, you could send him to Hogwarts to work in the kitchen with the other house elves that work there. That way the other house elves could keep an eye on him. HARRY Good, Kreacher I want you to go to Hogwarts and work in the kitchens there with the other house elves. Kreacher stands up, frowns, and vanishes. DUMBLEDORE Good. (He turns to the Dursleys) Now one last thing… As you will no doubt be aware, Harry comes of age in a year’s time… AUNT PETUNIA No, he doesn’t. He’s a month younger than Dudley, and Dudders doesn’t turn eighteen until the year after next. DUMBLEDORE Yes, but in the Wizarding world, we come of age at seventeen. UNCLE VERNON Now that’s a load of…. DUMBLEDORE (Dumbledore raises his finger up for silence and Vernon obliges.) Now, as you already know, the wizard called Lord Voldemort has returned to this country. With a letter I explained about his parents murder and expressing the hope that you would care for him as though he was your own. You did not do as I asked. The best that can be said is that he has at least escaped the appalling damage you have infliced upon your son… AUNT PETUNIA What do you mean damage? UNCLE VERNON Us…mistreat Dudders? What d’you… DUMBLEDORE Silence please! The magic I evoked fifteen years ago means that Harry has powerful protection while he can still call this house ‘home.’ This magic will cease to operate the moment that Harry turns seventeen. I ask only this, that you allow Harry to return, once more, to this house, before his seventeenth birthday, which will ensure that the protection continues until that time. Vernon looks as though he wants to say something in protest. DUMBLEDORE Now, Harry get your things and Petunia if you don’t mind I’d love to look at one of your muggle magazines, I do love knitting patterns. He looks at Petunia and she looks at him and the scene fades to… I'll keep it going until Diagon Alley, then I'm taking a break lol EXT. PRIVET DRIVE-NIGHT Harry and Dumbledore are walking down the street. DUMBLEDORE You have not, of course, passed your Apparition Test. HARRY No sir, I thought you had to be seventeen? DUMBLEDORE You do, so you will need to hold on to my arm very tightly. (Harry grabs Dumbledore’s arm) Very good, well here we go. They disapper off of Privet Drive and we see them fly off as if they’re in a fast tunnel made of light.. A look of horror fills Harrys face as everything went black as they were shifting from left to right. They then land and Harry see’s that they are standing in a yard. The camera pans back slowly to show them standing in front of “THE BURROW” the Weasleys’ home. EXT. THE BURROW- NIGHT They begin to walk towards the house. DUMBLEDORE Now Harry you have not asked me, what my favorite flavor of jam is. How do you know I’m not an imposter? HARRY Oh...I…um…Sherbert Lemon? DUMBLEDORE (Chuckles) Good guess, but it was raspberry. Also I am pleased and a little proud at how well you seem to be coping after everything that happened at the Ministry. It was cruel that you and Sirius had such a short time together. HARRY It’s just hard you know? To realize he won’t be there, But while I was at the Dursley’s, I realized I can’t shut msyelf away or crack up; Sirius wouldn’t have wanted that would he? People are dying; it could be me next, couldn’t it? And if it is, I’ll make sure I take as many Death Eaters with me as I can, and Voldemort too if I can manage it. DUMBLEDORE Spoken both like your mother and father’ son and Sirius’s true godson! HARRY (Noticing Dumbledore’s blackened hand once again) Professor…what happened to you… DUMBLEDORE There’s no time to explain it now, it is a thrilling tale, I wish to do it justice. Now on to another subject. (He stops walking and grabs Harry’s shoulder) Firstly, I wish you to keep your Invisibility Cloak with you at all times from this moment forward, do you understand? HARRY Yes sir… DUMBLEDORE And…It is my wish that you take private lessons with me this year. HARRY Private…! With you? Really? DUMBLEDORE Yes, I think it is time that I took a great hand in your education. HARRY What will you be teaching me, sir? DUMBLEDORE (airily) Oh, a little of this, a little of that. HARRY (laughs) Does that mean I don’t have to take Occlumency lessons with Snape? DUMBLEDORE Professor Snape, Harry, and no you will not! HARRY Good, because they were a load of…. DUMBLEDORE (He holds up his finger) I think the word ‘fiasco’ would be a good one here. Dumbledore and Harry laughs and INT. THE BURROW-RON’S BEDROOM-EARLY MORNING The scene fades to a shot of Harry sleeping. He stirs a bit and sits up and look across the room at Ron sleeping. As Harry yawns we hear MRS. WEASLEY BREAKFAST IS READY!!!!! Ron stirs and Harry steps out of bed. HARRY Ron, hey Ron wake up (Ron mumbles sleepily under his breath. Harry looks away smiles and turns around suddenly and screams) SPIDERS!!!! Ron jumps around frantically in panic and Harry falls on his bed in laughter. RON THAT WASN’T FUNNY ‘ARRY!! Harry continues to laugh as the scene cuts to INT. THE BURROW-KITCHEN-MOMENTS LATER Mrs. Weasley and Hermione cutting vegatbles together as Harry and Ron walk slowly down the stairs. MRS. WEASLEY (Turning around) Good morning Harry dear, it’s great to see you. HARRY You too Mrs. Weasley HERMIONE Harry! (She runs up to him and hugs him) HARRY Hey Hermione RON (sitting down at the table.) Has dad made it home yet? MRS. WEASLEY No, he’s a tiny bit late (She takes a look up at the family clock where all faces are pointing towards “Mortal Peril” now.) RON It’s been like that for a while, ever since You-Know-Who’ came back into the open. BILL WEASLEY and GINNY both sleepily walks in as he says this and goes to the sink BILL Well, this must be Harry Potter! MRS. WEASLEY Ah Harry yes, dear this is my other son Bill HARRY Nice to finally meet you! GINNY Hiya Harry HARRY (Smiles) Ginny…hey… MRS. WEASLEY Good Ginny dear could you help me with the vegetables please…? BILL So was the trip here okay….? HARRY Yeah I was with Dumbledore. BILL Good man Dumbledore… HARRY Yeah…so where are Fred and George? RON They’re raking in the Galleons! They have a new shop in Diagon Alley, we should be going there later… MRS. WEASLEY I must say I didn’t approve of it at first, but they do seem to have a flair for business. Oh! (Mr. Weasley’s hand on the clock moves from ‘Mortal Peril’ to traveling) Your fathers on his way kids! Mrs. Weasley waves her hand and the bread she was cutting flies on all the plates on the table. BILL So am I right in saying you’re going to make it to the wedding Harry? HARRY Wedding? RON I forgot to tell you, Bill here is getting married. Remember Fluer? HARRY Delacour? I competed in the Tri Wizard tournament with her? Nice! All the guys laugh and nod in approval and the three women at the counter all turn around towards them, make a noise of disgust, and turn back around. HARRY So how is that? BILL Oh it’s really good. GINNY Yeah it seems my dear brother has ended up with a nice cow for the family. RON Ginny and Mum don’t like that much, they think they’ve rushed the whole thing. (He looks at Hermione who has just sitten down and starts reading the Daily Prophet) So anyone we know dead? MRS. WEASLEY RONALD WEASLEY!!!! RON What!?! HERMIONE There have been another couple of dementor attacks and…oh no! (The camera pans over her shoulder to show the Shack from the beginning of the film with the Dark Mark hanging over it) They’ve found Igor Karkoroff’s body in a shack up north with the Dark Mark set over it! HARRY The head of Durmstrang? MRS. WEASLEY The very same, I’m surprised he stayed alive for even a year after deserting the Death Eaters. GINNY There’ve been a lot of dissappearences too Harry. RON Yeah like Ollivander the wandmaker (There is a knock on the door and everyone looks at it in silence.) MRS. WEASLEY Arthur, is that you? MR. WEASLEY (from outside the door) Yes, but I would say that even if I were a Death Eater. Ask the question! MRS. WEASLEY Oh, honestly Arthur. (Sighs) What is your dearest ambition? MR. WEASLEY To find out how airplanes stay up and now Molly, what do you like me to call you when we’re alone together? MRS. WEASLEY (She looks over her shoulders and see’s the kids looking at her. She gives a nervous chuckle and with a frantic whisper she says..) Mollywobbles. MR. WEASLEY Correct, now you can let me in. (The door opens and Mr. Weasley walks in and kisses his wife and sits down his briefcase.) MR. WEASLEY Harry, I didn’t know you were here already. Everything alright? HARRY Yes sir MR. WEASLEY Well I ran into a few owls on the way and I have a nice little treat for you lot. (He pulls out of his pocket a stack of mail.) O.W.L. results are in! HERMIONE (She jumps up in excitement) Are they here already! Feels like I’ve been waiting ages! Hermione, Ron, and Harry all take there letters from Mr. Weasley and proceeds to open them on the spot. HARRY I only failed Divination and History of Magic, and who cares about them? RON (Taking a look at Harry’s) I knew you’d be top at Defense Against the Dark Arts. We’ve done all right, haven’t we? We’re N.E.W.T. students now! MRS WEASLEY Well done! HARRY And look at this…we don’t have to take Potions anymore. No more Snape…this day is great already! GINNY Hermione? How did you do? HERMIONE Oh, I….not bad. RON Like you had anything to worry about in the first place. HERMIONE (She gives Ron a stern look and notices something hanging out of Harry’s envelope) Well look at this. (She takes it out and stares at it.) Seems as if Harry is Quidditch captain this year! RON Wow! Congrats Harry! … HARRY Thanks… GINNY Now all you have to do is break it to Ron early that he doesn’t have a chance on the team… RON Funny… MRS. WEASLEY Don’t’ forget that we are traveling to Diagon Alley later… MR. WEASLEY Don’t expect it to be the same Harry, its nearly completely empty now. The scare of You-Know-Who’s return has changed a lot of things. Now can I have a few more sausages dear..? The camera zooms in on Harry looking at everyone eat and give a slight smile as the scene fades to |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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And what is/was missing (except Spinners End) it seemed fine to me (except Spinners End) |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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What I'll try to do is find my drafts with my take on Spinner's End. If I remember correctly I was trying to be as vague as possible especially on Snape's behalf, but I'll make sure to post that as soon as I can find it. The reason why I took it out was because I thought, at the time, it gave to much away. After that chapter I knew Snape was up to something and I wanted the ending to come to a surprise in my Screenplay so I just got rid of it. Well here's Diagon Alley to Hogwarts :) Afterwards I'll explain why I did what I did aswell lol EXT. DIAGON ALLEY-LATER THAT DAY Mr. Weasley, Mrs. Weasley, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny walking down the streets of Diagon Alley. It doesn’t look the same however. It was empty, only a few familys where around. You see Ministry of Magic posters all around and black and white photos of Bellatrix Lestrange sneering on them. A lot of the familiar shops were boarded up and a few people were saleing things on the side of the streets. Then the scene fades too… INT. MADAM MALKIN- SAME DAY Harry, Ron, and Hermione walk into the shop and pause when they see Draco standing there in a mirror with Madam Milken knelt down threading Draco’s robs. DRACO I’m not a child, in case you haven’t noticed, Mother. I am perfectly capable of shopping alone! And watch where you’re sticking that pin, will you! He looks in the mirror again and notices the trio standing in the doorway and smirks. DRACO If you’re wondering what the smell is, Mother, a Mudblood just walked in. MADAM MALKIN I don’t think there’s any need for language like that! (She looks back and sees Harry and Ron both have their wands drawn) And I don’t want wands drawn in my shop either! HERMIONE (Grabs both there arms) No, don’t, it’s not worth it. NARCISSA MALFOY walks from around the corner NARCISSA Put those away. If you attack my son I shall ensure that it is the last thing you ever do. HARRY Really? Going to get a few Death Eater pals to do us in, are you? NARCISSA I see that being Dumbledore’s favorite has given you a false sense of security, Harry Potter. But Dumbledore won’t always be there to protect you. HARRY (He looks around the shop) That’s funny…look at that…he’s not here now! So why not have a go? They might be able to find you a double cell in Azkaban with your loser of a husband! DRACO (He turns around suddenly) Don’t you dare talk to my mother like that, Potter! NARCISSA It’s alright Draco. I expect Potter will be reunited with Sirius before I am reunited with Lucius. (Harry points his wand towards her face) DRACO Mother…I don’t think I want these robes anymore NARCISSA You’re right, Draco. Now I know the kind of scum that shops here…we’ll do better at Twilfitt and Tatting’s. MADAM MALIKIN Well, really! Narcissa grabs Draco by the arm as he throws the robes in Madam Malkins face and they exit. Hermione, Ron, and Harry all look at each other as the scene cuts to the Weasleys, Hermione, and Harry walking down the streets of Diagon Ally. The camera goes past them to a shop which, compared to the one’s around it, was light and lively. In the window of the shop was a large sign that read “Why Are You Worrying About You-Know-Who? You Should Be Worrying About U-No-Poo- The Constipation Sensation That’s Gripping The Nation!” The camera pans back to them standing in front of the window as Mrs. Weasley grabs her chest. MRS. WEASLEY They’ll be murdered in their sleep! They all walk into the shop and we see an assortment of gadgets and boxes. There are boxes labeled Skiving Snackboxes and Nosebleed Nougat. There are boxes of wans, quills which came in Self Inking and Smart Answer varieties. The camera s then pans to the front of the store where Fred and George are standing FRED Welcome FRED AND GEORGE To Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes!! They both walk up and hug their mom and dad. Fred punches Ron on the arm as he walks past him. HARRY Nice place guys. GINNY (She looks at love potions) Do these things work? GEORGE Certainly they work, for up to twenty-four hours at a time depending on the weight of the boy in question, and the attractiveness of the girl. But we’re not selling them to our sister, not when she’s already got about five boys on the go from what we’ve heard… GINNY (Irritably) Whatever you’ve heard from Ron is a big fat lie. FRED Are you or are you not currently going out with a boy called Dean Thomas? GINNY Yes I am, what are those? GEORGE Pygmy Puffs, Miniature puffskeins, we can’t breed them fast enough. So what about Micheal Corner? GINNY I dumped him, he was a bad loser. They’re really cute! FRED They’re fairly cuddly, yes. But you’re moving through boyfriends a bit fast, aren’t you? GINNY It’s none of your business. And I’ll thank you (She turns to look at Ron who just turned around the corner) not to tell tales about me to these two! RON WHAT! As they argue Harry looks out of the window and sees Draco Malfoy hurrying up the street alone. He looks over his shoulders and hurry’s out of view. Harry leans over to Hermione who is holding one of the Pygmy Puffs. HARRY Wonder where his mommy is? EXT. KNOCKTURN ALLEY-MINUTES LATER The scene cuts to Harry, Ron, and Hermione walking down the street in Harry’s invisibilty cloak. We see Draco take a turn down Knockturn Alley and the trio follows. They pause as Draco walkes in Borgin and Burkes. They walk up closley next to the door. They look in and see Malfoy talking to Mr. Borgin HERMIONE If only we could hear what they’re saying! RON We can. Hang out. (He starts searching his pockets.) Where are those damn things…oh here they are…Extendable Ears. They put one part of the string in their ears and the camera follows the other ends of the string under the floor and across the floor of the shop and stop close to Malfoy and Borgin. INT. BORGIN AND BURKES-MINUTES LATER DRACO You know how to fix it? BORGIN Possibly, I’ll need to see it, though. Why don’t you bring it into the shop? MALFOY I can’t. It’s got to stay put. I just need you to tell me how to do it. BORGIN Well without seeing it, I must say it will be a very difficult job, perhaps impossible. I couldn’t guarentee anything. DRACO No? Perhaps this will make you more confident. (The camera cuts to Harry with a look of suspicion on his face so we never see what Draco gives him and then cuts back to Draco.) Tell anyone and there will be retribution. You know Fenrir Greyback? He’s a family friend. He’ll be dropping in from time to time to make sure you’re giving the problem your full attention BORGIN There will be no need for… DRACO I’ll decide that. Not a word to anyone, Borgin, and that includes my mother, understand? BORGIN Naturally, naturally (He bows and Draco turns around wand walks out of the shop right past them in the Invisibility Cloak) EXT. DIAGON ALLEY-A FEW MINUTES LATER The scene cuts to them walking out of Knockturn Alley and slowly back to Fred and George’s shop without the cloak. HERMIONE Yes, it was fishy Harry, but there could be a lot of explanations for what Malfoy was talking about. HARRY I know it’s just, Malfoy’s fathers in Azkaban. Don’t you think he’d like revenge? RON Revenge? What can he do about it? HARRY I don’t know! But he’s up to something and I think we should take it seriously. His fathers a Death Eater and….(His stops walking as his eyes widen and Hermione looks at him with a worried look) HERMIONE Harry? What’s wrong? HARRY He’s a Death Eater. He’s replaced his father as a Death Eater! RON (Laughing) Malfoy? A Death Eater? Harry come on now! HARRY You guys don’t have to believe me, but I know somethings up with Malfoy and I’m going to find out what. There is a sound of a train and EXT. HOGWARTS EXPRESS-NOON The scene cuts to a shot of the Hogwarts Express going down the track. The camera goes up and INT. HOGWARTS EXPRESS- NOON Through the window into the compartment where Harry, Neville, and Luna are sitting. LUNA Are we still doing D.A. meetings this year, Harry? HARRY No point Luna, we’ve gotten rid of Umbridge. NEVILLE I liked the D.A. I learned loads from you! LUNA I enjoyed the meetings too. It was like having friends. A group of girls open the compartment giggling and one steps inside towards Harry ROMILDA Hey Harry, I’m Romilda Vance. Why don’t you join us in our compartment? You don’t have to sit with them! HARRY Oh I don’t do I? Well they’re friends of mine! ROMILDA Why? (She and her friends laugh) NEVILLE It’s ok Harry, you can go… HARRY No, these are my friends and I think you should go ROMILDA (Surprised) Are you serious? (Dissapointently) Well…Oh, Oh Ok then (She rushed out and closes the door) LUNA People expect you to have cooler friends than us. HARRY You are cool, none of them were at the Minsitry. They didn’t fight with me. Luna and Neville both smile at Harry and he looks out of the window with a look of deep thought on his face. NEVILLE Are you alright Harry? HARRY Yeah, I’m fine… LUNA I don’t think so…maybe a Wrackspurt got you? HARRY I may regret asking this, but a what? LUNA Wrackspurt…they’re invisible. They float in through your ears and make your brain go fuzzy. I thought I felt one zooming around in here. Luna starts flapping her hands around in mid air. Neville and Harry look at each other as if they’re trying to hold back a laugh and the compartment door opens and a young third year is standing there with an envelope.) STUDENT I’m supposed to deliver these to Neville Longbottom and Harry Potter. (The students hands it to them and exits.) NEVILLE What is it? HARRY I dunno (He opens up the letter and begins to read.) Harry, I would be delighted if you would join me for a bite of lunch in compartment C. Sincerely, Professor H. E. F. Slughorn. NEVILLE Who’s Professor Slughorn? INT. HOGWARTS EXPRESS-SLUGHORNS COMPARTMENT-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to Harry, Neville, Blaise Zabini, Ginny, Cormic MacLaggen and three other students sitting in the compartment. A large shiny head bald man with a silver mustache is also there with a great smile on his face. SLUGHORN Well now, this is most pleasant. Welcome you lot, I am Professor Slughorn, I’ve been asked to take up post in a missing spot at Hogwarts! I just called this meeting to get to know you all a little better. Can’t have to many connections eh? (chuckles) Harry, Neville, and Ginny all look at each other. SLUGHORN Ah Cormac McLaggen, I happen to know your Uncle Tiberius very well. CORMAC Do you sir? SLUGHORN Oh yes yes, splendid wizard he is. I’m sure no doubt you possess many of his varied talents yourself eh? CORMAC Well I must say I…. SLUGHORN (looks off a notices Harry’s scar) And you must be Harry Potter (He grabs his hand and shakes it) Pleasure it is HARRY Pleasure sir. SLUGHORN Where to begin with you Harry Potter? They’re calling you ‘The Chosen One’ now boy! Of course there have been rumors for years, I remember when…well after that terrible night…Lily...James…and you surivived and the word was that you must have powers beyond the ordinary… Zabini gives a little cough and the other Slytherians in the room laugh. GINNY Yeah, Zabini, because you’re soooo talented…at posing… SLUGHORN Oh dear! You want to careful, Blaise! Saw this young lady perform the most marvelous Bat Bogy Hex as I was passing her carriage! I wouldn’t cross her. (Chuckles) Now Harry Harry, you look so much like your father. Except for your eyes, you’ve got… HARRY My mother’s eyes, yeah…I’ve heard. SLUGHORN Yes well….I taught your parents; yes Lily Evans was an excellent student. One of the brightest I ever taught, charming. I used to tell her that she ought to be in my House! ZABINI And what house is that sir? SLUGHORN Why Slytherian of course! Zabini and the other slytherians in the room smile and Ginny rolls her eyes. SLUGHORN Your mother was muggle born of course, couldn’t believe it when I found out. Thought she must have been pure-blood, she was so good. HARRY One of my best friends is Muggle born and she’s the best in our year! SLUGHORN (Chuckles) Yes, funny how that sometimes happens isn’t it? HARRY (coldly) Not really… SLUGHORN You mustn’t think I’m prejudice! Your mother was one of my all time favorite students you know. HARRY I bet… SLUGHORN Heh, well…now on to you Zabini..how is your dear mother these days…. INT-HOGWARTS EXPRESS-HALLWAY-NIGHT As Slughorn continues to talk Harry looks out of the window and the scene cuts to all the students exiting Slughorns cabin. Neville, Ginny, and Harry turn and walk down the aisle’s together NEVILLE I’m glad that’s over, strange man isn’t he? GINNY So what class d’you suppose he’s teaching? HARRY Probably Defense… (Zabini bumps into Harry as he walks past towards the Slytherian compartment) And what is he playing at anyways. He only invited people because of who they were connected to or who they know….except for you Ginny what did you…? GINNY Oh he saw me hex Zacharias Smith, he thought it was really good and invited me to lunch. HARRY Well better reason for inviting someone than because their mother’s famous or because their uncle…. (He pauses and continues to watch Zabini walk up the hall) I’ll see you two later NEVILLE But what’re you… (Harry pulls out his invisibility cloack and looks around to see if anyone’s looking and throws it over himself. He runs up behinds Zabini who opens the compartment and INT. HOGWARTS EXPRESS- SLYTHERIAN COMPARTMENT-NOON They open their compartment and he slides in before they close it. Inside the room is Zabini, Goyle, Crabbe, Malfoy, and Pansy Parkinson. Before Zabini can sit down Harry jumps on his seat and jumps up into the luggage compartment and his foot comes from under the cloack for a quick second and he lies down. ZABINI What’s going on? (sitting down) MALFOY What did Slughorn want? ZABINI Just trying to make up to well connected people, not that he managed to find many. He invited Longbottom, Potter, and that Weasley girl! MALFOY He invited Longbottom? What’s Longbottom got to interest Slughorn? And Potter, obviously he wanted a look at ‘the Chosen One’ but that Weasley girl! What’s so special about her! PANSY A lot of boys like her, even you think she’s good looking don’t you Blaise? ZABINI I wouldn’t touch a filthy blood traitor like her whatever she looked like. MALFOY Pity, father always said Slughorn was a good wizard in his day, but it seems he’s gone a bit senile. Who cares who’s he’s interested in anyways, he’s just a stupid teacher. I mean I might not even be at Hogwarts next year…. ZABINI Really? DRACO Well you never know, I might have moved on to bigger and better things. PANSY (Gasp) Do you mean…him? DRACO Mother wants me to complete my education, but personally, I don’t see it as that important these days. When the Dark Lord takes over, is he going to care how many O.W.L.s or N.E.W.T.s anyone’s got? ZABINI And you think you’ll be able to do something for him? Sixteen years old and not even fully qualified yet? DRACO I’ve just said, haven’t I? Maybe the job he wants me to do isn’t something that you need to be qualified for. (Crabbe and Goyle look at each other.) I can see Hogwarts, we’d better get our robes on. The scene cuts to show the train slowing down to stop. Everyone is leaving the compartment one by one. Draco then pauses and turns back around. He closes the door and lets down the blinds. He then points his wand to where Harry is hidden DRACO Petrificus Totalus! We see Harry eyes widen as he is frozen and falls out of the compartment on the floor without his cloak. Draco is looking down on him smiling. DRACO I thought so, I saw something white flash through the air after Zabini came back. You didn’t hear anything I care about, Potter. But while I’ve got you here… (He stomps on Harry’s face. Blood is streaming from Harry’s noes.) That’s from my father. Now lets see….(He grabs the invisibility cloak and throws it over Harry.) I don’t reckon they’ll find you till the trains back in London. See you around Potter…or not. Draco walks out of the compartment and slams the door and we see Harry trapped underneath the invisibility cloak unable to move. The train starts to move under him and we see and hand reached down and pulled the cloak off of him, and the camera pans to Tonks standing there. TONKS Wotcher Harry. (She points her wand at him and a flash of red light hits Harry and he’s unfrozen.) We’d better get out of here, quickly. The scene cuts to… EXT. TRAIN STATION- DUSK Harry and Tonks walking from the train station and there is a shot of Hogwarts in the distance. TONKS Who did it? HARRY Draco Malfoy, Tonks thanks for…. TONKS No problem, I can fix your nose if you stand still. (She points her wand at his nose) Episkey. HARRY Thanks. TONKS We can walk up to the school. (She waves her wand in the air and a silver four legged creature erupts from the wand and streaks off towards the castle) I’m sending word to the castle that I’ve got you. HARRY How did you find me? TONKS I noticed you hadn’t left the train and I knew you had the cloak. I saw the blinds drawn on that compartment so I thought I’d check. HARRY But what are you doing here, anyway? TONKS I’m stationed at Hogsmeade with Proudfoot, Savage, and Dawlish to give the school extra protection. The scene fades to… Ok so WHY did I leave the Draco Compartment thing in...dunno..I liked the scene. Also as you guys will see hopefully I have a beginning, middle, and end as it pertains to Harry/Draco's fight. As you have seen Fenrir will be in and like I said before this was before DH so ALOT will change lol. Would I cut it now..probably so. Also in this draft I wasn't sure how important Lupin/Tonks was and Bill/Fluer was. In my new one I will focus more on Lupin/Tonks, but in this one they're hinted at but it's not stated that they're together. The next time I post will be Great Hall until the end of the first Potions lesson I suppose. :tu: |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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My suggestion is to SHORTEN this scene. You really dont need to have about 10 min. worth of film for delivering Harry. I dont think you need to have McGonagall say that even the muggles are noticing, its in their news. We already had a bit of the news- the movie watchers can see that the muggles have it on their tv. Also, the discussion of saying LV v. you-know-who isnt needed because we learn about all that stuff later with Hagrid. Just some tips, they may not be to your liking so if thats the case, I wont be offended for your rejection and sorry I couldnt be of more help. Overall, your changes are better. I am the same kind of fan that is ticked off with the movies for lack of canon and stuff but cuts do need to be made. The original script was almost exactly the same thing as the book. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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I took it into consideration and have done some cuts Here's the first half of that scene (still lengthy) The first half of the arrival scene I am cutting: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
INT. THE GREAT HALL-NIGHT
…Harry walking into the Great Hall with the rest of the students. He sits down between Harry and Ron HERMIONE What happened? HARRY I’ll tell you later. The camera pans to Dumbledore standing up and the hall goes silent. DUMBLEDORE To our new students, welcome, to our old students, welcome back! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak! Thank You. (There’s a laugh throughout the students as he turns to sit down and we hear McGonnagall clear her throat and throw a stern look at Dumbledore) Oh right.. (He turns back around to the students.) Another year full of magical education awaits you… HERMIONE What happened to his hand? RON Dunno, but he seems to be off his nutter HARRY His hand was like that when I saw him over the summer. I thought he’d have cured it by now though…. HERMIONE It looks as if it’s died. But there are some injuries you can’t cure…old curses… DUMBLEDORE We are pleased to welcome a new member of staff this year. Professor Slughorn is a former collegue of mine who has agreed to resume his old post of Potions master? Everyone starts to look at each other in shock at the announced and Slughorn stands up and there is an applause . RON Potions? DUMBLEDORE Professor Snape, meanwhile, will be taking over the position of Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. HARRY No.... No it can’t be. The Slytherian table stands up to clap as Snape raises his hand in acknowledgement RON Well there’s one good thing, Snape’ll be gone by the end of the year. HERMIONE What do you mean? RON The jobs jinxed. No one’s lasted more than a year. HARRY Lets keep our fingers crossed for a death… HERMIONE Harry! DUMBLEDORE Now, as everybody in this Hall knows, Lord Voldemort and his followers are once again large and gaining in strength. (The enitre hall goes silent). I cannot emphasize strongly enough how dangerous the present sitiuation is. I urge you all, to abide by any securtiy restrictions that your teacher might impose upon you. I trust you to conduct yourselves, always, with the utmost regrad for your own and others safety. The scene fades amd cuts to… EXT. DEFENSE AGAINST THE DARK ARTS CLASSROOM-DAY The students are sitting in their Defense Against the Dark Arts class talking amongst themselves. Snape storms into the room and some student proceed to take out their books. SNAPE I have not asked you to take out your books, I wish to speak to you, and I want your fullest attention. I am surprised so many of you scraped an O.W.L in this subject, I shall be even more surprised if all of you manage to keep up with the N.E.W.T. work. The Dark Arts are many, varied, ever changing, and eternal. Your defenses must therefore be as flexible and inventive as the arts you seek to undo. These pictures give a fair reprensentation of what happens to those who suffer, for instance, (He waves his hand and the screen in the front of the class shows a witch that is shrieking in agony) the Cruciatus Curse (there is a quick shot of Neville as he waves his hand again and we see a wizard lying on the ground with a blank expression) feel the Dementors Kiss (he waves his hand and there’s a bloody mass on the projector) or provoke the agression of the Inferius. Now who here can tell me what an Inferi is? He looks around and only Hermione raises her hand. He looks over her and continues to talk… SNAPE Since there is know one…Inferi are corpses. Dead bodies that have been bewitched to a dark wizard biddings. PERVATI Has an Inferius been seen, then? Is it definite, he is using them? SNAPE The Dark Lord has used Inferi in the past, which means you would be well advised to assume he might use them again. Now can someone tell me the advantage of using a nonverbal spell? Hermione is the only one who raises her hand again. Snape looks around past her but knowone else is raising their hand. He sighs and turns back to Hermione. SNAPE Very well…Miss Granger? HERMIONE Your adversary has no warning about what kind of magic you’re about to perform, which gives you a split second advantage. SNAPE An answer copied almost word for word from The Standard Book of Spells, Grade Six. (We see a shot of Malfoy and his friends laugh.) But correct in essentials. Those who progress to using magic without shouting incantations gain an element of surprise in their spell casting. Not all wizards can do this, of course; it is a question of concentration and mind power which some... (He looks at Harry) Lack. Now you will now divide into pairs. One partner will attempt to jinx the other without speaking. The other will attempt to repel the jinx in equal silence. Carry on. The scene cuts to everyone in his or her pairs attempting to jinx the other. The camera pans to Ron who has a strained look on his face as he tries to jinx Harry. RON Bloody hell, this seemed so much easier when someone else does it… HARRY Just concentrate a little more or something Ron strains his face again and a weird sounds shoots out of his wand and everyone in the class laughs. Snape frowns and walks swiftly over to them and looks at Ron in disgust. SNAPE Pathetic, Weasley. (He takes out his wand) Here…let me show you (Snape turns quickly and points his wand at Harry) HARRY PROTEGO! The sheild reflects the spell throwing Snape backwards into his desk. He gets up angrily and walks towards Harry. SNAPE Do you remember me telling you we were practicing nonverbal spells, Potter? HARRY Yes. SNAPE Yes, sir. HARRY There’s no need to call me ‘sir,’ Professor People gasp in the background SNAPE Detention, Saturday night, my office Potter. I do not take cheek from anyone…not even ‘the Chosen One’ Now you all get back to your lesson. The camera zooms in to Harry and the scene fades to… INT. HOGWARTS-FIRST FLOOR CORRIDOR-AFTERNOON Harry, Ron, and Hermione walking down a hallway. There are a few students walking around holding hands and Ron frowns at one couple as they pass by. HERMIONE Harry what made you say that to him? HARRY He tried to jinx me, in case you didn’t notice! What’s Dumbledore playing at, anyway, letting him teach Defense? Did you hear him talking about the Dark Arts? He loves them! All that unfixed, indestructable stuff… HERMIONE I thought he sounded a bit like you when you were telling us what it’s like to face Voldemort. You said it wasn’t just about memorizing a bunch of spells. RON Yeah but still, I always knew Dumbledore was going off his rocker, and this just proves it. And now we have to take Potions again since Slughorn is excepting lower scores for the course… A group of girls pass by and Lavender Brown waves at Ron with a smile on her face. He waves back and we see Herimione roll her eyes as Katie Bell comes running up behind them with a letter in his hand. KATIE Harry! Hey, Harry! (She hands Harry the letter) For you! Listen, congrats on making captian for the team. Tell me when you call trials! HARRY Don’t be stupid Katie, you don’t need to try out. I’ve watched you play for five years… KATIE You mustn’t start off like that, good teams have been ruined before because Captians just kept playing the old faces and letting in their friends. Gotta run though, see ya! (Katie bows his head and runs off) HARRY (Opens the letter and reads) It’s from Dumbledore, he wants me to meet him in his office on Saturday for the private lessons. RON Snapes not going to be pleased, you won’t be able to go to detention HARRY All the better then. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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Spoiler: show You can give me criticism too. Here's the next part of the 'Boy Who Lived' scene. Together, it's still lengthy. The second half of the arrival scene I am cutting: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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As you can see, I am struggling at the arrival of Harry: I want to make it short, but I want to have lots of information in it. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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I guess I'll go re-read chapter 17 though. Now I'm curious. edit: well, it's pretty much exactly the same, isn't it? voldemort shows up unexpected, james tells lily to protect harry, gets killed, voldemort goes upstairs, kills lily and then tries to kill harry. i just added some fire. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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--- Here are a couple of scenes I've been thinking about for the past week: The first is form DH, the start of King's Cross: The second will be in OotP, when Harry's breaking stuff (it's forshadowing, see if you can work it out) --- Update on the Harry arrival scene: It's gone from 6 pages to 4 and a half. I think I'm happy with it now, but I haven't changed around the written stuff, just the dialogue, so it may come out as 5 pages I put the Shreiking Shack scene from PoA in the same format as I do and it came out as 7 pages, so maybe some of these big scenes can be long. When I write the graveyard scene in GoF, that will probably be 20 pages won't it, cause that's, what, 4 chapters long in the book --- Yeah, it's ended up as 5 pages Here's the full scene --- So I'm moving on. I now have 7 pages of Dudley's Birthday/Snake incident I want to make 4 or 5. And I'm meant to be writing a speech... --- I've been trying to make the thread easier to read, as the posts are REALLY long, but they need to be. I was searching the FAQs to find something useful and found these. They are really helpful at shortening the thread, yet keeping everything there, I suggest you use them. Quote:
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
The next scene which I am having trouble cutting: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
I love the rewrite, good job. Its much better. I will read the next scene you just posted tomorrow, I dont have time to do it now.
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Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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I think I'm too protective of my work. Once I've written it I don't want it to go. But something has to or it will be nearing 4 or 5 hours. I'm fine with 3 hours, but would prefer the shortest with the most in it. It's going to be horrible when I try scripting OotP. --- I decided to leave the Vanishing Glass for the moment and am now trying to cut the letter arrival scene. It's funny because I told myself that I would have scenes in between them unlike 2001-PS-Film, but I've cut the desruction of Dudley's toy's, I've cut Mrs Figg, I've cut the uniforms and any mention of Dudley's or Harry's schools (should that go back in?). All together I've cut 3 pages of scenes in between these two. --- I decided to compare timings with the 2004-PoA script I have in the same format. By the time 'The Boy Who Lived' is over, Harry's on the Knight Bus. Harry meets Ron and Hermione the same time he meets the snake. Dementors are attacking by the time the Petunia and Vernon finish their talk about the letter. Though, I always think the beginning of the HP films have been rushed --- On a bright note, I've gone from 26 pages to 18 for up to the first letter. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
Phrozenone, you write the scenes nicely but some of the scenes you included are ABOLUTELY POINTLESS. Why bother with Igor Karkaroff? He has nothing, absolutely nothing, to do with the plot, it is just a waste of screen time in my opinion. I would have include Spinner's End instead, or write a more relevant scene.
The Dursleys - the scene is much TOO LONG, and include some absolutely pointless pieces of dialog. For example, I would have cut Kreacher and Grimmauld Place all together... and Dumbledore talking at the end is too long. Later, why bother with OWLs results? They have nothing to do with the plot of the book. I would also cut both Bill & Fleur, but this is a much harder choice. Again, CUT KARKAROFF, his mentions is pointless. I would cut Quidditch, cut the Madam Malkin shop scene, and as much as I like her - cut Luna Lovegood too. She'll come back in DH. I found a old HBP scripts I've written. They are very old and not that good, but here it is if you're interested... might have cut too much, though. I have two versions of the opening - Spinner's End and a new scene. ---------------------- FIRST OPENING EXT. A MUGGLE STREET, NIGHT Music begins. A shot of a dark town from above. The camera delay on a street: someone is moving there. BELLATRIX LESTRANGE AVADA KEDAVRA! A shot of green light; The man is falling down down, dead. Two womans get out from behind the bush. It is Bellatrix and Narcissa. Bellatrix kneeling over the body. BELLATRIX LESTRANGE Just a muggle, I though perhaps an auror... Cissy, wait! Narcissa start walking. BELLATRIX LESTRANGE It is a betrayel of the dark lord! NARCISSA MALFOY That’s my son! You don’t understand, Bella, you never had sons... BELLATRIX LESTRANGE Narcissa Malfoy, don’t do it! The Dark Lord ordered you not to! NARCISSA MALFOY Leave me alone. I’ve done my desicion! The two womans reach a house. Narcissa knocks on the door: it opens and we see Severus Snape standing in there. INT SNAPE’S HOUSE SEVERUS SNAPE Narcissa, Bellatrix, what a suprise! Come in... NARCISSA MALFOY I need to talk to you, Snape. Are we alone? SEVERUS SNAPE Yes, we are quite alone. What is it, Narcissa? NARCISSA MALFOY The Dark Lord has forbidden me to talk about it, but... SEVERUS SNAPE Then you should shut your mouth! BELLATRIX LESTRANGE You see? Even he say you can’t speak on the Dark Lord secret plans for anyone! SEVERUS SNAPE However... I already know the plan. Little silence. NARCISSA MALFOY I know you would! The Dark Lord trust you so much! SEVERUS SNAPE Well... what do you need me to do? NARCISSA MALFOY My son! My only son! SEVERUS SNAPE I can’t change the Dark Lord’s mind, if that’s what you’re asking. He already decided: Draco will do it. Narcissa start crying. NARCISSA MALFOY But why? He is too young! He will never make it! And... The Dark Lord does not want him to succeed, right? He want him to die trying, as a revenge for Lucios failure! BELLATRIX LESTRANGE You should be proud! Your son is about to do a very important mission, and... NARCISSA MALFOY I don’t care it’s important! He will die! He’s too proud to ask for help! You can help him, Severus... SEVERUS SNAPE I can try, but... BELLATRIX LESTRANGE Of course, he’ll try, but he can’t promise! Bet he has some excuse... NARCISSA MALFOY No, he means it! Will you please swear it? Will you make the Unbreakable Vow? BELLATRIX LESTRANGE What? You are asking him to vow on his own lives? You know how the vow works, don’t you? If he’ll break it, he’ll die! Silence. Close up of Narcissa desprate face, then to Bella’s face, and finally, Snape’s face. SEVERUS SNAPE Yes, Narcissa, I am prepared to make the Unbreakable Vow. NARCISSA MALFOY Thank you, Severus. Come here... She takes out her wand, and take Snape's hand. NARCISSA MALFOY Severus Snape, will you look after my son and try to help him? SEVERUS SNAPE I will. NARCISSA MALFOY Will you do everything in your power to protect him from any harm? SEVERUS SNAPE I will. NARCISSA MALFOY And... shall it seems he'll fail... Will you carry on the deed the Dark Lord ordered him to perform? SEVERUS SNAPE I will. A great flaming snake emerges from Narcissa's wand, going around Snape, and straight into the camera. We then see the sky, where a text appears: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. ALTERNATIVE OPENING 1 EXT. VILLAGE, RAINY AND DARK DAY A few shots of STREETS with houses. Some of the houses are ruined down. The DARK MARK is visible far in the sky. A few DE’s are visible around the corner, wearing masks and black robes so their face can’t be seen. They run to a house and blast it with a spell. 2 INT. A HOUSE. DEs are inside, pointing their wand on somewhere in the apartment. DE1, has a cold and scary voice. Search the house. Now! The other run to the rooms. DE1 stays in his place. RANDOM DE He’s here, master! DE1 Good. Bring him to me. The DEs are returning to the hall, forcing Horace Slughorn to come with them. DE1 Leave, all of you. Me and him will have a little chat. The others leave. DE1 take off his mask. It is Lord Voldemort. VOLDEMORT Remember me, Old Sluggy? Silence. Slughorn is looking scared. VOLDEMORT You used to teach me when I was young, remember? I pretended to respect you. The pathetic part is that you actually believed it. Another silence. A close up on Voldemort’s face. Show a quick shot of teenage Voldemort. Slughorn is still looking scared. VOLDEMORT But in the end, it was worth to do all this, remember? You gave me information. Very important information. Slughorn is speaking at last. SLUGHORN No! Please don’t kill me, I will do anything, I will... Voldemort laughs. VOLDEMORT Not as brave as the phoenix lot, right? I wondered why you never helped the Order of the Phoenix. Now I realise why, you pathetic old man. Another silence. VOLDEMORT Look at you. An old, useless scared man. I still wonder how could you believe that I admired you. That someone ever admired you. Slughorn is still looking scared. His voice his trembeling, SLUGHORN What do you want? VOLDEMORT Quit your job, Slughorn. Break your contact with Dumbledore. Never – ever – speak with him again. And, if you ever think of mentioning our little chat, when I was sixteen... Slughorn is trembeling. VOLDEMORT You want a little taste of what will happen to you? Crucio! Slughorn is screaming, deeply in pain. Voldemort laughs. He raise his wand and Slughorn stops screaming. VOLDEMORT That was just the promo, you pathetic old man. You are very lucky to stay alive. You helped me once. Lord Voldemort pay back to those who helped him... But remember, if you ever mention our conversation, back in my school days... He leaves the last sentence in the air. There is no need to complete it. Voldemort is leaving the house. Camera leaves the room. Bright flash. We can see the title over the dark skies: “HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE” 3. INT. BURROW, LIVING ROOM Trio+Ginny are sitting in a room. Ron and Harry are playing wizard chess. Hermione is reading a newspaper. Headline screams: “HARRY POTTER: THE CHOSEN ONE?” HARRY All the paper’s full of it. They all think I’m the chosen one. They see me as some kind of hero. That I would have to destroy Voldemort in the end. HERMIONE They don’t *know* anything – they are just guessing. RON Well they are right. You are the chosen one. GINNY You have nothing to worry Harry. Dumbledore will protect you, surely. He won’t leave you alone. He... A knock on the door. Mrs Weasley, briefly appears, open the door. Dumbledore enters the room. MOLLY Hey Albus! What a suprise! Tea? DUMBLEDORE No, Molly, thanks. Actually I came to talk with Harry. Ginny gives Harry an “I-TOLD-YOU-SO” look. Harry stand up. DUMBLEDORE After you. 4. EXT. BURROW GARDEN DAYLIGHT Harry and Dumbledore walking to the garden. Dumbledore hands is inside a pocket. DUMBLEDORE How are you feeling, Harry? HARRY (LIFELESS VOICE) Fine. DUMBLEDORE You don’t look so. Listen, I know discovering the prophecy is not easy. To discover you are the one to destroy Voldemort... but you have to know something. You’re not alone. You’re with me. Harry looks at him. DUMBLEDORE (CONTINUED) This year, Harry, I am going to prepare you to what lies ahead. You are going to have a series of private lessons with me. HARRY Private lessons? With you? DUMBLEDORE Yes, Harry. Just came to tell you that. I have to leave now, sorry. Goodbye. As he leaves, he raise his hand. It is black, burned and dead-looking. HARRY Professor! What happened to your hand? DUMBLEDORE Not now, Harry. This is a nice tale; I wish to do it justice. I will tell you someday. And with that, he leaves. 5. INT. BURROW LIVING ROOM. Harry re-enters the room. RON What did he wanted? HARRY I’m going to have private lessons with him this year. He’s going to prepare me to the battle with Voldemort. Ginny gives Harry and “I-TOLD-YOU-SO” look, again. Harry tries to change the subject. HARRY Anything interesting in the paper? HERMIONE There is a new Minister of Magic. His name is Rufus Scrimegour. (We see a picture of his face). RON He looks tough. HERMIONE He used to catch dark wizards. Molly Weasley enter the room. MOLLY Come on everyobdy! We are going to Diagon Alley! 6. EXT DIAGON ALLEY, SUNNY AFTERNOON. Wide shot of the place from behind. Trio+Ginny walks down the street. A random kid point his hand on Harry and smile. HARRY Again! They all think I’m a kind of hero! The kid moves, behind him we can see Draco Malfoy running across the street. RON Did you saw Malfoy? I wonder what he’s doing... HARRY Well, there’s only one way to know. HERMIONE Harry, you can’t seriously mean that... But before she could finish the sentence Harry, Ron and Ginny disappeard. She makes an annoying sound. HERMIONE (ANNOYED) Okay, I’m coming. 7. EXT: KNOCTORN ALLEY, SAME AFTERNOON. Trio+Ginny walk down the street. HARRY There he is! We can see Malfoy talking to Borgin inside a shop. MALFOY You’ll know how to fix it then? BORGIN I’ll have to see it, I’m afraid. MALFOY I got a feeling you don’t understand how serious is this. Malfoy shows Borgin something on his hand. Borgin flinches. MALFOY So... can you fix it? BORGIN (SCARED) I’ll do my best. MALFOY No. You’ll do much more than you’re best. And with that, he leaves. Trio+Ginny is shocked. RON What the bloody hell was that?? 8. EXT A FOREST, DAYTIME. The Hogwarts express is driving on a bridge. 9. INT. A COMPARTMENT IN THE TRAIN. Trio is sitting together. RON Fishy, isn’t it? This Malfoy thing. HARRY Yes. I wonder what he wants to fix. It can’t be something good. HERMIONE Don’t take it too seriously. It may be nothing serious. HARRY But you saw how seriously Borgin took him? I wonder what Malfoy showed him on his arm... Little silence. HARRY Wait a minute! it was his left arm, wasn’t it? Maybe it was the Dark Mark! Maybe he replaced his father as a Death Eater! HERMIONE Dunno, Harry. Do you honestly think Voldemort will let a 16 years old boy in? Before Harry can answer, Ginny pass by in a corridor. HERMIONE Hey, Ginny. Do you want to seat with us? GINNY Sorry, I can’t. I have to meet Dean. She leaves. HARRY Dean? HERMIONE Dean Thomas. Her boyfriend. RON Wait a minute! Dean Thomas is... her boyfriend? HERMIONE Yes. Why are you so in shock? RON Never liked him. HERMIONE Just to remind you, he was a good friend of you for five years. You simply don’t like that fact that your sister is going out with people. Silence. Neville Longbottom enter the compartement. NEVILLE Harry, come here please. Harry walks with him. Neville hand him a letter. HARRY It’s an invatition for a lunch with... Professor Slughorn. RON Who’s Professor Slughorn? 10. INT. ANOTHER COMPARTMENT IN THE TRAIN A few kids is sitting around an old fat man called Horace Slughorn. SLUGHORN I am professor Slughorn! I will be a new teacher this year! Now, do we know everyone? He turns to the kids. They all looking ashamed and don’t reply. SLUGHORN Well, this is Cormac Mclaggen – his uncle holds a office at the ministry. And Belbi – his uncle invented the Wolfsbane potion. Neville Longbottom – His parents were well known aurors before being tortured to madness by the Death Eatres. And Harry Potter needs no introducing, of course! Little Silence. Harry looks un-confident. SLUGHORN (CONTINUED) The rumors, my dear boy! The prophecy! The chosen one! The fight in the Ministry of Magic! NEVILLE I was there too. There is no prophecy. The papers just making out things. As usual. SLUGHORN Well, The papers does have an annoying inclination to make things up... Anyway, Harry, I used to know your mother. Such an extraordinary witch. So smart and talented. But she’s dead now... It’s terrible... 11. EXT. HOGWARTS CASTLE, EVENING A wise shot of the castle. 12. EXT. HOGWARTS CASTLE, MORNING. Another wide shot. 13. INT. A CLASSROOM, MORNING. We see the class, and Snape enters it. Class is silence. Some kids are looking in their books. SNAPE Put your books away. NOW! I want to talk to you! HARRY Where is Professor Slughorn, sir? SNAPE Raise your hand, Potter! Professor Slughorn is not your Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. I am. RON You? But Dumbledore rejected your request for the post in the last 6 years! What made him change his mind? SNAPE Detention, Weasley. If you ask another question today it will be a WEEK of detentions. I want to talk to you. SNAPE (CONTINUED) The Dark Arts are many, eternal and ever-changing. Fighting them is like fighting a many-headed monster – each time you kill on head, the second one will attack you, stronger then the previous. Permit me to say that it is probably the most important class in this school, especially in this war times. SNAPE On those walls He points at some paintings. SNAPE (CONTINUED) you can see a few examples to what the Dark Arts can do. You can see what happens to those who feel the Cruciatos Curse He points on a man who’s in pain. SNAPE (CONTINUED) the Dementor’s Kiss He points to a man with a blank-expression. SNAPE (CONTINUED) or the Inferious Pointing on a picture of a Inferi SEAMUS What are the Inferious? SNAPE Dead bodies, controlled by a dark spell. The Inferi have no will of their own; They are like a puppets, forced to do what the wizard makes them too. Since they have Close Up of the Inferious in the picture. SNAPE (CONTINUED) no blood to spill nor they have vulnerable points like a heart or a mind, it is extremely difficult to kill them. However, they are creatures of the dark, and they fear light and warm. Close up of Harry’s face SNAPE (CONTINUED) If you ever come face-to-face with one, the best thing you can do is to light a fire. A Slytherin KID come running in to class. BOY Professor! Sorry to interrupt, but it’s urgent! It’s Crabbe, Malfoy’s friend! He entered the Broken Vanishing Cabinet! By mistake, of course, but SNAPE (INTERRUPTING) Take me to him. 14. INT. A CLASSROOM Crabbe is sitting on the floor, confused. Malfoy and the boy enter the class. Snape takes Crabbe in his hand. SNAPE Scatter now, everyone! Show’s over! They all leave. A close up on Malfoy’s face... 15. INT. A CORRIDOR Trio walks together. HARRY A Vanishing Cabinet? What is that? HERMIONE There’s supposed to be a pair. You can enter one of them, and then to get out from the other. Good to make quick escapes. RON That boy... he said it was broken. What does it mean? HERMIONE Well, you can’t use it obviously. You can’t enter. HARRY But if you enter the working one...? HERMIONE You’ll be lost. Stuck. You’ll have nowhere to go. That’s probably what happend to Crabbe. 16. INT. A CLASSROOM Kids are sitting. Slughorn enters the class. SLUGHORN Hello everybody! My name is Professor Slughorn and I will be your new Potions teacher! Get out your books, everybody... They all do so. Harry looks confused. HARRY Professor, I’m sorry. My book’s gone. SLUGHORN You can take one of these for today. They are all second-handed, but still... Harry takes a second-handed book. SLUGHORN Well, we have a marvalous lesson today, and to celebrate our first lesson, I decided to give a special prize to the one who will give me the best potion today! Well, the prize is... THIS! He takes out the bottle of Felix Felicis. SLUGHORN Know what is is? Yes, miss Granger? HERMIONE It is Felix Felicis! It gives the drinker luck! SLUGHORN Exactly! This bottle is enough for 12 hours of luck! Once you’ve taken it, everything will go right to you! Nice prize, isn’t it? Class nod. SLUGHORN (CONTINUED) Well, how can you win it? Open page 6 in your books. You need to make a ‘Drought Of Living Death’ until the end of the lesson. The one with the best potion will be the winner! Everyone is looking at their books. HARRY (TO RON AND HERMIONE) Look at that! The previous owner of this book has written all over the page! I can’t read it! 17. INT. A CLASSROOM (LATER) A shot of the class working. HERMIONE What are you doing, Harry? You are adding a wormwood! It’s not in the book! HARRY Maybe, but the previous owner added it to the list in his handwrite! Well, it suppose to be blue now... look at that! Harry’s potion is turning blue. HARRY Well, now, stir it clockwise... HERMIONE It is not clockwise, Harry! It is against clockwise! HARRY But the previous owner say it is clockwise... look, my potion looks exactly like the one in the picture! SLUGHORN Time’s up! Let’s see what you have to show me! 18. INT A CLASSROOM (LATER) Slughorn is getting to Harry’s table. SLUGHORN Wow! Look at that everyone! The clear winner! Very good, Harry, very good... Here is your prize – Felix Felicis. You deserve it. Use it wisely! 19. INT. A CORRIDOR. HARRY Look at that book! The previous owner has corrected nearly every potion in this book! RON Who is the previous owner? Perhaps he has written his name on it! HARRY Well... Here! A close up on a page... Harry is reading: “The book is the property of The Half-Blood Prince” RON The Half-Blood Prince? Who is that? HARRY Dunno... 20. INT. DUMBLEDORE’S OFFICE Harry enter the office. Dumbledore is sitting there. DUMBLEDORE Good evening, Harry. Sit down. Harry is sitting down. The Pensieve is on the table DUMBLEDORE Now that you know about the prophecy, I think it’s time for me to share some information with you About Voldemort. HARRY What information? DUMBLEDORE We need to learn about him as much as possible. But there is another reason... these lessons have another and much greater reason. Harry looks confused. DUMBLEDORE I can’t tell you now. First of all... you must know some things. You remember the pensieve, I guess? Harry nods. DUMBLEDORE I got something I want to show you. After you, Harry. Harry touches the pensieve and enter. 21. INT. A DARK CAVE Harry and Dumbledore walk together in a dark place. We can see two kids from a distance: One is the black-haired young Tom Riddle, the other is the red-heared Amy Benson. AMY Where are you taking me, Tom? TOM That’s a suprise. Amy looks at him, charmed. He just smiles gently. They reach the big, black lake. AMY This is a scary place, Tom! What do you want to show me? What if we’ll lose our way out? TOM You don’t need to worry about that. AMY Why not? TOM Because you won’t get out of here. Never! 22. INT. DUMBLEDORE’S OFFICE A quick cut, and we’re back in Dumbledore’s office. HARRY What was that? DUMBLEDORE As you may have guessed, that was a lonely orphan boy called Tom Riddle. HARRY The teenage Voldemort. DUMBLEDORE Indeed. The girl with him is another girl from his orphanage. HARRY What... what he was doing? DUMBLEDORE At that point, Tom Riddle dosen’t known that he’s a wizard. But it seemes he has learned to have certain controls of his powers. He knew he has powers, though he can’t named them as ‘magic’. DUMBLEDORE (CONTINUED) Tom Riddle was a young sadistic boy. In the scene we just watched, Riddle was taking a poor girl into a cave to torture her. She survived, but the other kids said she never came back to herself. Harry scans the room, and he finds a ring on the desk. HARRY That ring. It has the symbol of Slytherin on it. DUMBELDORE Yes Harry. You can guess who was her previous owner. HARRY Slytherin himself? DUMBLEODRE Actually, it was Voldemort. That ring has passed in his family for generations. HARRY Then why do you have it? DUMBLEDORE One day you will know. Harry understand this is the end of the conversation and leaves. 23. EXT. HOGWARTS CASTLE Another wide shot of the castle, from different angle. 24. INT. A CORRIDOR. Harry and Ron walking in a corridor. The boys are walking through a secret passage behind a door, and find Ginny and Dean snogging. Music begins. A close-up on Harry’s face, then on Ginny and Dean, and then again on Harry’s face – he’s looking shocked and strange. RON Hello! Ginny and Dean break apart. DEAN Sorry, I’ll just go... RON Oh, didn’t meant to interrupt you, you seemed very busy... GINNY What’s your point? RON My point? I just found my sister snogging in public! So everyone can see, so everyone will think you are a... GINNY Everyone? What are you talking about? This was a deserted corridor until you came in! What is your problem? RON I don’t want people to think you are a... GINNY Oh, I got it! You are jealous. Just becasue you never kissed anyone in your life – well, unless you count our Auntie Muriel! It’s pathetic! A little silence. At this point, a close-up on Harry confused face, and then a close-up on Dean, who is watching Harry confused face with a strange expression, who seem to understand... RON This is a lie! Just because I don’t do it in public, and... GINNY I would advise you to stop here, you’re just embarrassing yourself! Harry kissed Cho, Hermione kissed Victor Krum, It’s just you acting like it is disgusting! She and Dean walk away, leaving an angry Ron and a confused harry alone. 25. INT. BEDROOM, NIGHTIME. A shot Harry is lying in his bed, still awake, with the same confused expression... 26. EXT. HOGWARTS SUNNY DAY Trio+Ginny is walking together. Ron and Ginny refuse to look at each other. HERMIONE Oh, will you two stop it? It’s getting really annoying. GINNY He started. He’s just jealous. HERMIONE looks desperate. As the walk they bump into RUFUS SCRIMEGOUR, the minister of magic. HARRY Sorry. He realise who he bumped into, and stop. SCRIMEGOUR Oh, it’s okay. Will you come with me to a little tour, Harry? HARRY hasitates but walks with him. 27. EXT. HOGWARTS GROUNDS, LATER. SUNNY DAY. Harry and RUFUS SCRIMEGOUR are walking together. SCRIMEGOUR I wanted to talk with you for a long time. You knew that? HARRY No, minister. SCRIMEGOUR How much I tried to convince Dumbledore, but he won’t let me. I gave up. But now I just bumped into you! HARRY But why you wanted to talk with me, minister? SCRIMEGOUR We are in dark times, Harry. We live in a constant fear. You can’t trust anybody. Every day more people die. We all know we can be the next. Harry nods, don’t understand where is Scrimegour leading to. SCRIMEGOUR (CONTINUED) In such dark times, people would like to think the ministry is doing something. That we are winning. Raising the moral is important. You, Harry... You give people hope. The idea that there is someone out there, who can, who HAVE to destroy You-Know-Who... well, naturally it’s giving people hope. I think that in such dark times, you should... side the ministry. HARRY What do you mean? SCRIMEGOUR Nothing too annoying, I promise. For example, if you were seen walking in and out from the ministry... it would give the right impression. If you’ll say in the paper that the ministry is doing a wonderful job, then HARRY But you’re not doing a wonderful job. SCRIMEGOUR Maybe. But sometimes lying is necessary, to raise people moral. HARRY So basiclly, you want me to lie to the public and to support the minitry. I still remember last year, minister. Harry shows the scars on his hand. You can still see the word: LIAR in there. HARRY Last year, when the ministry said I was a liar, tried to throw me out from the magical society, I don’t remember you bumping into my defence. I won’t lie to the world. I won’t support a organization who did everything he can to throw me out from the magical society. To make my life a living hell. SCRIMEGOUR I knew you may reject. Dumbledore done a very good job on you. HARRY Dumbledore is smarter then all the ministry together. You seem cleverer then Fudge, the last minister, so I think you can learn from his mistakes. He tried to interfere at Hogwarts; You may notice he’s not a minister anymore, but Dumbledore is still the headmaster. SCRIMEGOUR I see... You are Dumbledore’s man through and through, right Potter? HARRY Yes I am. Glad I clarified it. With that, he leaves. 28, INT. A CORRIDOR Harry walks in a corridor, alone. He hear voice from one of the classrooms near. SNAPE (OFF-SCREEN) Answer me, Draco! Do you have a plan how to do it? Harry stops and listen. 29. INT. A CLASSROOM DRACO Yes, I have. SNAPE And? What is it? DRACO It’s none of your business! I’m not a fool, you know. SNAPE A fool? I’m trying to help you, Draco. DRACO Help me? You want to stop me, to make me fail, so you can do it instead and to have all the glory! But no, He told me to do it, and I will! SNAPE Draco, I am trying to help you. I talked to your mother, she asked me to help you. I made the Unbreakable Vow, Draco... DRACO I don’t care, I don’t need help! I don’t care what my mother told you, she thinks I am only a child and I will never succeed! But I will prove that she is wrong. I will do it. I’m going to be the Dark Lord’s favourite Death Eater. I don’t need help from you! And he burst out of the room from the other door. Harry is looking shocked. 30. INT STUDY HALL Trio are sitting and talking. HEMIONE Harry, I don’t think Snape really tried to help Malfoy. We know he spy on the Death Eaters; I think he simply pretended to offer him help, So Malfoy will tell him his plan and then Dumbledore can act to prevent it. HARRY But that’s proves that Malfoy is up to something, and that he is working for Voldemort. HERMIONE Yes, you’re right on this one. HARRY So what is he doing? Perhaps Voldemort needs someone in Hogwarts. It is easier to use someone that is allowed to be there, then to try and enter some spy. RON Maybe. HARRY (CONTINUED) We need to follow him somehow. I know! 31. INT. COMMON ROOM A close up on the Maurdars Map. Hundreds of dots are moving. HARRY See! I can see where Malfoy is! Look, he is in the seventh floor... he walks across it... Now he’s... Harry stops. Malfoy simply disappeard from the map. HERMIONE He disappeard. RON But how? HERMIONE The seventh floor. What is in the seventh floor? HARRY The room of requierment. 32. INT. SEVENTH FLOOR Trio runs in the corridor. Harry stand in front of a door. HARRY Well, let me try it. HARRY (TO THE DOOR) I need to see what Draco Malfoy is doing inside you. Nothing happens. HARRY I’ll try again. I need you to become the place you become for Draco Malfoy. Nothing happens. HERMIONE It’s not working. HARRY But why? HERMIONE Because you don’t know what you wish to find behind that door. The Room of Requierment become what you want it to; If you don’t know what you want to see behind you can’t open it. 33. INT DUMBLEDORE’S OFFICE Harry enter the room. DUMBLEDORE I’ve been expecting you. Sit down. Harry sits down. DUMBLEDORE Today I got two memories to show you. The second one is, I believe, the most important one I collected so far. Let’s see the first memory, shall we? They both stand up. DUMBLEDORE After you, Harry. Harry touch the pensieve and dive into it. 34. INT. FANCY ROOM We see a fancy room with an old fat lady. Tom Riddle enter the room. RIDDLE Hello Mrs Smith. MRS SMITH Hello Tom! Sit down, please. RIDDLE sit down. MRS SMITH Coffee? RIDDLE No need. Thank you. MRS SMITH Thank you for coming here. I got something really special to show you. She points on a shelf. Two boxes are in it. She takes them. MRS SMITH Open it, Tom. He opens it. Inside we can see a cup, with the letter H on it. RIDDLE H. So this cup was... MRS SMITH Helga Huffelpuf’s, as you know very well. But this one here... She opens the other one. Inside we can see a big locket with the letter S on it. MRS SMITH Slytherin’s. My most expensive treasure... A close up on Riddle’s jealous face. And for a moment, his brown eyes turns red... 35. INT DUMBLEDORE’S OFFICE. We’re back into the office. DUMBLEDORE Two days later Mrs Smith was dead. The cup and the locket was gone. HARRY Voldemort! He killed her and stoled them! DUMBLEDORE Indeed. These items may be a key items to our story. But now, Harry, the second memory... He takes another memory. DUMBLEDORE This memory was given to me by Horace Slughorn. I think you may find it... unusual. After you. They enter the pensieve. 36. SLUGHORN’S OFFICE We see a few kids there, leaving. They all have tags on their sleeves: “THE SLUG CLUB”. One boy stays behind. Tom Riddle. SLUGHORN What’s that, boy? RIDDLE I want to ask you something. SLUGHORN Go on. RIDDLE I want to ask you what you know about... Horcruxes. All of a sudden, mist appear out of nowhere; We can’t see anything. SLUGHORN (ECHOING VOICE) I don’t know anything about Horcruxes, and would’nt tell you even if I knew! Now get back to bed, and don’t ever mention them again!! 37. DUMBLEDORE’S OFFICE We fade back to Dumbledore’s office. HARRY That’s it? What’s so important about it? DUMLEDORE What you just saw is only half-true. The mist is just a trap Slughorn made. He never actually said those words, what you heard in the mist... HARRY Then what actually happend? DUMBLEDORE This is your mission, Harry. You’ll need to bring me the real memory. Only then we will know... Voldemort greatest and darkest secret. 38 EXT. GROUNDS. SNOW A very snowy day. 49. INT THE GREAT HALL The hall is decorated for christmas. 40. SLUGHORN’S OFFICE Harry enter the room. Slughorn’s inside. SLUGHORN Hello Harry! I was looking for you. Next Saturday I’m doing a party, you see. Can you be there? HARRY Sorry, Professor. I have... Quidditch practice. SLUGHORN Oh, unlucky. Anyway, take this bottle Slughorn hands Harry a bottle of wine. SLUGHORN I was planning to give this to Dumbledore, as a christmas present... Well he can’t miss what he never had! HARRY Actually, I wanted to ask you something else. I wonder what you know... about Horcruxes. Slughorn’s face froze immidietly. He looks shocked. SLUGHORN (SHOCKED) Dumbledore. He showed you that memory. Right? HARRY Yes he did, but SLUGHORN Then you should know I don’t know nothing about Horcruxes. HARRY But I though maybe there is a bit more to this memory... SLUGHORN You though? Then you’re wrong, boy. WRONG! 41. INT. STUDY HALL Trio are sitting together in the study hall, doing homework. Ron is staring at a long essay. RON I hate Snape! It’s christmas vacation! But he gave us loads of homework! Who cares about poison anyway? HERMIONE (SACRCATIC) Pity your stupid Half-Blood Prince can’t help you now. HARRY Wait a minute. The Prince did wrote something... “Simply slip a Bezoar to their throat”. RON A bezoar? HERMIONE A stone that protects you from most of the poisons. You got one in your potion-making set. RON You mean... all that (He points at the essay) was pointless? All I need is only... a stone? HERMIONE Well... You can put it this way. Harry takes a stone from his set, and slowly puts it in his pocket... 42. TOWER DORMITORY. MORNING Ron is in his bed, sleeping. We see a lot of presents near his bed. 4 boys are around him, speaking quietly. HARRY Ready? 1, 2, 3... Together the four of them sing “Happy Birthday To You” (perhaps with some magical lyrics?). Ron is waking up, confused. HARRY Happy Birthday, mate! RON Oh... He’s eyes meet the presents near his bed and he grins. RON Thank you! HARRY Let’s party! ---------------------- Here's my go on King's Cross, beggining with Arry Grotter version. I didn't include much of the conversation becuase it is too damn long, but the important stuff is in, I think. I'm not so good in descriptions so they are kind of lousy (or else, copied from the book). --------------------- The camera zooms in on Harry’s head, lying face down. And… …the scene fades. Harry is still lying in the same position and place. Slowly Harry wakes up. The surrounds are cloudy and misty. Harry moves nothing but his eyes, lying their gracefully. He reaches out an arm to feel the mist he is lying on. He pushes it, it springs back a little. He suddenly notices his arm is bare and looks at the rest of his body, taken a back. Suddenly robes materialize on him out of nowhere. He decides to stand up. The place still looks like a cloud, but as he finally is on his feet, a room start to form. A wide-open space reveals itself, bright and clean, a hall larger by far than the Great Hall, with that clear domed glass ceiling. It is quite empty. Suddenly Harry hears a baby crying. It sounds distorted and unnatural. He slowly approach the source of the noise. It has the form of a small, naked child, curled on the ground, its skin raw and rough, flayed-looking, and it lay shuddering under a seat where it had been left, unwanted, stuffed out of sight, struggling for breath. Harry gets near it, afraid to touch, and then - ALBUS DUMBLEDORE You cannot help it. Harry jumps, suprised. Albus Dumbledore approaches him, his hand healthy again, a big smile on his face. HARRY POTTER But... you're dead. ALBUS DUMBLEDORE Yes, I am dead. HARRY POTTER So... am I dead too? ALBUS DUMBLEDORE This is the question, isn't it? On the whole, I think no. Harry looks astonished. HARRY POTTER But I was hit by a killing curse. I should have died. ALBUS DUMBLEDORE You should have died, yes. However, it appears that there are... special circumstances that kept you alive. HARRY POTTER What are they? ALBUS DUMBLEDORE But you already know, don't you? Think about what Voldemort done, in a deserted muggle graveyard, three years ago. HARRY POTTER He took my blood. ALBUS DUMBLEDORE Precisely! Your blood in his veins, Harry, Lily protection inside both of you! While this protection lives inside his body, you cannot die. He tethered you to live while he lives! HARRY POTTER I live... while he lives? But then, the Horcrux inside me - how we could get rid of it, if I can't die? ALBUS DUMBLEDORE He already took care of it. The Horcrux inside you was never protected, Harry, so he wasn't protected - and he was destroyed when you was hit by a killing curse. Harry looks relieved. HARRY POTTER Where are we? ALBUS DUMBLEDORE Good gracious, I have no idea. I was about to ask you. This is, as they say - your party. Where do you think we are? HARRY POTTER It looks like... King's Cross station, only much cleaner, and it's empty, and there's no trains, as far as I can see. A moment of hesitation, and then... HARRY POTTER I'm not dead, you say? Then I have to go back, do I? ALBUS DUMBLEDORE This is your choice, Harry. If you want, you can... board a train. HARRY POTTER And where it will take me? ALBUS DUMBLEDORE On. HARRY POTTER But... you want me to go back, don't you? ALBUS DUMBLEDORE I think that if you go back, there is a chance Lord Voldemort will be finished for good. I cannot promise it, but I know this, Harry; If you go back, he has much more to fear about coming back here then you have. ALBUS DUMBLEDORE (Continued) By returning, you may ensure that fewer souls are maimed, fewer families are torn apart. If that seems to you a worthy goal, they we saw good-bye for the present. Harry nods. HARRY POTTER Tell me one last thing. Is it real, or is it happening inside my head? ALBUS DUMBLEDORE Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean it is not real? ------------------- That's it, sorry for the long post. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
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I just came up with an idea for the PS classes: |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
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I think the reason I put Karkorofff in this was because I wanted to have Voldemort in this one atleast once, but your solution of having Slughorn was a very good idea. Kudos! :tu: Like I said I included O.W.L. results because I thought they'd probably have it more in the previous movie but alas I was wrong. And I agree about Fluer and Bill. Actually you won't be seeing Fluer in this one and I have another draft of the script where I cut them out all together so I hear ya man. I agree the Dursleys scene is long now that I look at it and trust me it was MUCH shorter when I first wrote it, but once I realized how funny it was I added in more 'funny' (Oh yeah and like I said I didn't know how Kreacher and Grimmauld Place was going to effect the series when I wrote this so I included them just in case :)) Quote:
I hear ya and so far I don't have anymore to add to your script that hasn't been said already (about it being a little long in certain spots, but alas I have that same problem sometimes lol) but keep it up. Trust me I have 4 drafts of HPB...each VERY different because there's always something you can do different. But alas here is the next part to my script. Let me know what you guys think ;) INT-POTIONS CLASSROOM-EVENING The scene cuts to Slughorn pacing in front of the class. SLUGHORN Now then! Scales out, everyone, and potion kits, and don’t forget your copies of Advanced Potion Making (Harry raises his hand) Yes Harry? HARRY I haven’t got a book or scale or anything…nor’s Ron…we didn’t realize we’d be able to do the N.E.W.T., you see… SLUGHORN Oh yes, Professor McGonagall mentioned this to me. Not to worry, you can use ingrediants from the store cupboard today. Harry and Ron walk up to the cupboard to collect their things while Slughorn continues to talk SLUGHORN Now, I’ve prepared a few potions here for you to look at, just out of interest, you know. These are the kind of things you ought to be able to make after completing your N.E.W.T.s. (He points at the first one.) Can anyone tell me what this one is? (Hermione raises her hand.) Yes, dear? HERMIONE It’s Veritaserum, a colorless, odorless potion that forces the drinker to tell the truth. SLUGHORN Very good! Now can anyone tell me what this one…(Hermione raises her hand again as Harry and Ron take their seats with their materials.) HERMIONE It’s Polyjuice Potion, sir. SLUGHORN Quite right! May I ask your name, my dear? HERMIONE Hermione Granger, sir. Harry and Ron both walk back to their seats and sit down SLUGHORN Granger? Can you possibly be related to Hector Dagworth-Granger, who founded the Most Extraordinary Society of Potioneeers? HERMIONE No sir, I’m Muggle born. SLUGHORN Oho! I’m assuming this is the very friend of whom you spoke about that is the best of your year, Harry? HARRY Yes, sir. (He looks at Hermione as she smiles embarresingly) SLUGHORN Lovely, I say Twenty Points for Gryffindor! And now, it is time for us to start work. NEVILLE Sir, you haven’t told us what’s in this one! SLUGHORN Oh yes, well that one is a most curious potion called Felix Felicis. I take it that you know what Felix Felicis does, Miss Granger? HERMIONE It’s liquid luck. it makes you lucky. (Everyone in the class murmers with excitement.) SLUGHORN Quite right. Its desperately tricky to make, and disatrous to get wrong. However, if brewed correctly, as this has been, you will find that all your endeavors tend to succed…at least until the effects wear off. DEAN Why don’t people drink it all the time, sir? SLUGHORN Because if taken in excess, it causes giddiness, recklessness, and dangerous overconfidence. Too much of a good thing, you know. SEAMUS Have you ever taken it, sir? SLUGHORN Twice in my life. Now, one tiny bottle of Felix Felicis is the prize I’m giving away at the end of this lesson. Enough for twelve hours luck! Now turn to page ten of Advanced Potions Making and you will attemp to make a decent Draught of Living Death. The scene cuts to everyone rushing to do the spell. The camera goes over Harry’s shoulder where there are notes written by the previous owner on the side of the actual curse. His finger goes over the written notes. HARRY Strange…I wonder. He proceeds to do what the person wrote and Hermione looks at him in anger when his potion seems to be coming furthur along than hers. HERMIONE How are you doing that? HARRY Add a clockwise stir… HERMIONE No, the book says counterclockwise! SLUGHORN And times up! (He starts to walk around the room looking at the potion and stops at Harry) The clear winner. Excellent, Harry. It is clear you’ve inherited your mother’s talent. Here you are then, one bottle of Felix Felices. Harry smiles and Hermione sends an angry glare at him as the scene fades to… INT. OUTSIDE OF SLUGHORN CLASS-EVENING The scene cuts to them leaving class and Hermione running up to Harry. HERMIONE How did you do that? HARRY Good luck, I suppose. What is it? You think I cheated? HERMIONE Well it wasn’t exactly your own work, was it? RON He only followed different instructions to ours. HARRY Yeah, I just tried a few tips written in the margins! HERMIONE We ought to check that there’s nothing odd about it. I mean... (She pulls out her wand.) HARRY Hermione…what… (She grabs his book and points her wand at it. HERMIONE Specialis Revelio! Nothing happens HARRY Finished? Or d’you want to wait and see if it does a few backflips. HERMIONE It seems all right. HARRY Good. Then I’ll have it back. Harry takes the book and walks off away from them. He looks down at the book and the camera pans to see whats written on it is ‘This Book is the Property of the Half-Blood Prince’. The scene then fades to… INT-DUMBLEDORE’S OFFICE-NIGHT Dumbledore is standing next to with his back towards the Penseive and Harry is standing in front of him DUMBLEDORE So, Harry. You have been wondering, I am sure, what I have planned for you during these lessons? Well, I have decided that it is time, now that you know what prompted Lord Voldemort to try and kill you fifteen years ago, for you to be given certain information. HARRY Sir, does what you’re going to tell me have anything to do with the prophecy? DUMBLEDORE It has a great deal to do with the prophecy and I certainly hope that it will help you to survive. Dumbledore turns around and looks into the Pensieve DUMBLEDORE This time, you enter the Pensieve with me…and, even more unusually, with permission. HARRY Where are we going sir? DUMBLEDORE For a trip down Bob Ogdens memory lane... He takes out a bottle and pours the memory into the Pensieve and ther camera zooms in on his blackened hand as he pours. HARRY Sir...how did you injure your…. DUMBLEDORE Now is not the moment for the story Harry, now, after you. Harry walks up to the Pensive and looks into it. There is a flash and we see him falling into the contents and he lands near a man wearing thick glasses. Dumbledore lands beside him. EXT. LITTLE HANGLETON-DAY The man starts to walk away and Harry and Dumbledore follow him. The man walks up to an old house where a dead snake is nailed to the door. Morfin drops from the nearest tree and lands behind the man startling him. *Parseltongue is italicized* MORFIN You’re not welcome ODGEN Um…good morning…I’m from the Ministry of Magic MORFIN You’re not welcome! DUMBLEDORE You understand him, I’m sure, Harry? HARRY Yes of course, oh, he’s speaking Parseltongue? Morfin has a knife in one hand and a wand in another. He rushes to attack Ogden when a man appears from inside the house. GAUNT Morfin! (Morfin stops and stares at Gaunt) Ministry, is it? ODGEN Co…correct. It is your son I’m here to see, Mr. Gaunt. GAUNT Are you pure-blood? OGDEN That’s neither here nor there! GAUNT Get in the house, don’t argue. Morfin looks at Ogden and proceeds to enter the house. INT. HOUSE OF GAUNT-LIVING ROOM-DAY The scene cuts to them inside the cottage where we see a thin girl standing behind the stove. GAUNT M’daughter, Merope. OGDEN Good morning! Merope looks at him in fright and turns around and starts shifting through the pots that are behind her. OGDEN Yes, well, Mr. Gaunt to get straight to the point, we have reason to believe that your son, Morfin, performed magic in front of a Muggle late last night. (There is a clang and the camera pans to Merope who has just dropped a pot.) GAUNT Pick it up! That’s it, grub on the floor like some filthy Muggle, what’s your wand for, you useless sack of muck? Morfin starts to laugh as Merope pulls out her wand to mend one pot and makes another one explode. GAUNT Mend it, you pointless lump, mend it! (She raises her wand again but Gaunt stands up and points his wand at the pots.) Reparo! (The pots repair.) Lucky the nice man from the Ministry’s here, isn’t it? Perhaps he’ll take you off my hands, perhaps he doesn’t mind dirty Squibs… OGDEN Mr. Gaunt, please, the reason for my visit… GAUNT I heard you the first time! OGDEN Morfin has broken Wizarding law. GAUNT He taught a filthy Muggle a lesson, that’s illegal now, is it? OGDEN Yes, I’m afraid it is. (Pulls out a piece of parchment.) GAUNT What’s that, then, his sentence? OGDEN It is a summons to the Ministry for a hearing… GAUNT Summons! Who do you think you are, summoning my son anywhere? OGDEN I’m Head of the Magical Law Enforcement Squad. GAUNT And you think we’re scum do you! (He rushes up to Ogden) GAUNT Do you know who you’re talking to, you filthy little Mudblood, do you! (He holds up his finger in Ogdens face showing a black stoned ring he is wearing on his middle finger.) See this? Know what it is? Centuries its been in our family, that’s how far back we go, and pure blood all the way! OGDEN Mr. Gaunt your son has commited… Gaunt rushed towards Merope and drags her by the gold chain around her neck. She kicks and screams as she is pulled across the floor. Odgen stands there appalled. GAUNT See this! (The camera zooms in on the necklace with an S that Gaunt is holding around Merope’s neck) Salazar Slytherins! We’re his last living descendants, what do you say to that, eh? So don’t you go talking to us as if we’re dirt on your shoes! Generations of purebloods, wizards all…more than you can say, I don’t doubt! (He lets her go as there is a rustling outside and we see a shot of the carriage passing by. We see the young man and young lady laughing amongst themselves as they pass by the cottage.) MORFIN She likes looking at the Muggle. Always in the garden when he passes. Hanging out of the window waiting for him to rise home…. GAUNT Is it true. My daughter…pure blooded descendant of Salazar Slytherin…hankering after a filthy, dirt veined Muggle? Merope is sitting in the corner shaking her head frantically with her hand over her ears. MORFIN But I got him father, I got him as he went by and he didn’t look so pretty with hives all over him, did he Merope? GAUNT You disgusting little Squib, you filthy little blood traitor! Gaunt rushed towards her and grabs her by the throat. HARRY and OGDEN No! ODGEN (Pulls out his wand) Relashio! Gaunt is throw backwards and Morfin leaps out of his chair towards Ogden. Ogden runs for his life out of the cabin with Morfin following him and Merope sitting in the corner screaming. Dumbledore puts his hand on Harry’s shoulder. DUMBLEDORE I think that will do, Harry. The scene flashes and Dumbledore and Harry are back in his office. INT. DUMBLEDORE’S OFFICE-NIGHT HARRY What happened to the girl in the cottage? DUMBLEDORE Oh, she survived. Ogden apparated back to the Ministry and returned with reinforcements. There was a fight, the ministry won, and Morfin was sentenced to three years in Azkaban. Marvolo, who had injured several Ministry employees, received six months. HARRY Marvolo? Do you mean that old man was…? DUMBLEDORE Voldemort’s grandfather, yes. He walks over to sit behind his desk and Harry sits in front of the desk HARRY So Merope…sir…does that mean she was…Voldemort’s mother? DUMBLEDORE It does and it so happens that we also had a glimpse of Voldemort father. HARRY That muggle? The man on the horse? DUMBLEDORE Tom Riddle senior, the handsome Muggle for whom Merope Gaunt cherished with a secret, burning passion. So once her brother and father were in jail she was free to leave. My guess is she used a love potion to make Riddle fall for her. Needless to say when her father returned from Azkaban he wasn’t happy, he never spoke her name again. He died shortly afterwards. HARRY And Merope? Wasn’t Voldemort brought up in an orphanage? DUMBLEDORE Indeed. You see within a few months of their runaway marriage Riddle returned. My guess is Merope loved him so deeply that she thought that, she convinced him to love her, so she lifted the spell. He left her when she was pregnant, never to see her again, and never troubled to discover what became of his son. HARRY Sir…is it important to know all this about Voldemort’s past? DUMBLEDORE Very important, I think. Well I think that’s enough for today Harry. Harry turns to leave he notices the gold ring with the cracked, black stone, sitting on one of Dumbledore’s tables. HARRY Sir…that ring…you were wearing it when you came to get me from the Dursleys. DUMBLEDORE So I was. HARRY But isn’t it the same ring Marvolo Gaunt showed Ogden? DUMBLEDORE The very same. HARRY But how did you… DUMBLEDORE Not now Harry. You shall hear the story another time. Goodnight. Quote:
You should also remember don't try and introduce everything in the first film because you have 6 others to do and for each movie you have to do a reintroduction anyways. Having clues or a shot of something is useful if you must but I remember the couple behind me while watching the first HP movie were bored out of their minds because it started to drag to them (And they wish they would've went to see...what was it..Ghost Ship? lol) Some of the information can be moved to later in the movie. Space it out so it doesn't feel like "Jeez I've been watching this film for 5 mins and we're still on the same scene" Also you know the end of the story now so choose what characters you want in ur screenplay wisely. You know who's going to play a major part and who doesn't and I would suggest giving their lines to someone who will be more important in the long run. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
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Cutting characters? Hmm... Characters that have been in the story: Albus Dumbledore - He's staying Arabella Figg - She was cut (as said above) Baby Dudley Dursley - He HAS to say Shan't! Cartoon Voice - Cut (Part of Mrs Figg's) Cloaked Person 1 - The Potters, that's what I heard... Cloaked Person 2 - ...Yes, their son, Harry... Cloaked Person 3 - Cut Dudley Dursley - Staying Grunnings Worker 1 - Cut Grunnings Worker 2 - Cut Harry Potter - Cut :lol:(j/k) Ice-Cream Lady - Cut Minerva McGonagall - Staying Petunia Dursley - Must Stay Piers Polkiss - At the moment, he's in Reptile House Keeper - Cut Rubeus Hagrid - Staying Snake - Brazil, here he comes Sybil Trelawney - The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approahes... Television Jim - In at the moment Televison Ted - Going to be a downpour of owls? Vernon Dursley - Staying Voldemort - Avada Kedavra! Young Harry Potter - How did I get my scar? Zoo Director - Cut Edit: I forgot the non-speaking roles, like Baby Harry Potter and Dudley's gang, which is cut I DO have a lot of characters don't I: 17! at the moment --- I just cut out Television Ted since all he had been saying was "Going to be any more showers of owls to night Jim?" and I thought it wasn't nessacary, next on the chopping block would be Piers, but I really want it to be more like the book than 2001-movie, so he's staying, for the moment. I just cut one of the letter scenes, actually, I don't think I've posted that. I'll do that in a sec. --- The scene I jumped ahead too: ![]() --- Quote:
I do get what you mean. Quote:
-- I think this thread should win for 'Longest Posts' |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
I see no point in showing the Gaunt House scene, other then introducing the ring, which could be introduced in some other way. I would advise you to look at my draft, where I replaced the Gaunt scene with the Cave scene, which has a lot more to do with the plot of the book in my opinion. I think it would be wise to introduce the cave earlier...
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Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
I will format this soon, but here it is. Edit: Format done
The part I just wrote: ![]() A quick note: I am now back at school. Therfore I won't be updating my script as frequently. --- I'm going to do a big, large post, so are you ready? Script reports: Character report: ![]() Dialogue report: ![]() Script so far: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
I must say, cutting is hard.
I'm back to the 'I've written tons' part, so am cutting, or trying. I have 28 scenes to fiddle with --- I've just finished my cut for 'The Letters from No One'. I cut like two lines. The only other part I felt I could cut was Railview Hotel, but part of me wants to keep it. Should I keep it? Option A: ![]() Option B: ![]() Update: I have decided to rid the hotel, hence changing the dates (not that it really matters) I've finished the third draft as I called it to the shack point. First>Third differences. 55>33 scenes 33>23 pages 24>16 speaking characters |
Re: Fan Scripts: Harry Potter Remakes
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PS: Where is everyone else, I've posted 3 times in a row! (13 if you include edits) Edit: The page numbering systems gone kaput. Now that I scroll down, it says 138 of 99 for CoS and 129 of 113 for PoA. They are probably the same (The formatting in the scripts aren't perfect) Edit 2: I forgot to put this up: I have finally finished the next HUGE chunk (CH 2 and 3). It was hard. I think it is still a bit too long, but it is nothing like it was when it had Mrs Figg in there. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
Um, can anyone think of a good idea of showing it is Harry's Birthday? I really like how Kloves did it, but can't really think of anything else.
--- Once again, where is everyone. Am I talking to myself? Because I couldn't think of anything different, I ended up doing something similar. Harry's Bday: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
The Next Scene (With no Cuts AT ALL)
Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid The It-doesn't-leave-out-anything Hut-on-the-Rock scene: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
ArryGrotter, you're film will probably be about 6 hours long... it's simply too long. I suggest you make a lot of cuts. The official version is much better.
I'm write now working on a DH script. It has a lot less cuts then my previous scripts (I ended up including stuff like Lily's letter). I hope you'll enjoy it and give me feedback. here it is: DH Script - Until Kreacher: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
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Things I didn't like: The cut from "I want some info, Olivander" to the title was weird (but got understanderable slightly later.) Dobby the WAITRESS??:err: (Waiter) I did like the adaption for T___ Court Road (Can't remember what it's called) and many other things as well. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
I've cut this scene a bit, but am unsure what else to cut. I wanted to cut the food, but couldn't figure out how. Help?
PS:Hut-on-the-rock Some cuts but more needed: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
I thought up this last night
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Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
More cuts, more needed. HELP!!!: ![]() Now that I cut the food I have rid of this mention: RUBEUS HAGRID Couldn’t make us a cup o’ tea, could yeh? It’s not been an easy journey... 2001-Movie did this well with him saying: "Sorry about that". I can't think of anything to replace it, and it doesn't flow well with nothing there. --- Recently I was thinking about Quidditch in the OotP movie (or lack of) and influence me to write this: I'm reading PoA at the moment, so I decided to script a scene from there.When I script PoA, this scene will need to be cut a bit |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
I wrote this all today. It is all first draft, i.e. NOTHING cut, except maybe a couple of lines here and there.
This is exactly like the books. I will cut it quite a bit: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
The main problem I see with most of these scripts is that you are trying to add everything from the book, and if it isn't exactly from the book, it is a slight change. Half the reason why these things weren't in the movies were because they are so incredibly boring. One scene I would like to see added, however, is the Dursleys in GoF.
This looks like a lot of fun, so be expecting to see me in a day or two with my DH script. :) |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
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GoF is a script I can't wait to do. That movie is awful now I've seen it 1,000,000 times. Can't wait to see your script! |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
Oh, it isn't just you, but yes, I see where you are cutting. I myself may have a problem with cutting things, but mostly, I think I can manage making it different from the books but keeping the story line like Kloves and the other guy *forgot his name momentarily* have done.
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Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
I can't wait for DH.
I hope the lead up of the final battle is along the lines of this.: ![]() --- Because I MIGHT need to split DH into 2: ![]() Also, for some reason I was wondering why Dumbledore knew Moody was Barty Crouch Jr (He asked for Winky) and then I remembered about Occlumency. So I plan to write, um, Harry and Cedric's return, I suppose the scene is, including a part when Dumbledore stops trusting "Mad-Eye". I will probably write it tomorrow. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
Maybe my script IS a bit too long...
Cause the page count was 30 for chapters 1-4, and I've written half of chapter 5 and now it's 45. I look at my first draft of 1-4. That was 52. Therefore (about to do maths) 52/30=1.733333333333333333333333333 (52+14)/1.7333333333333333333333333333=39.23076923........ .. Um, 40 pages for 5 chapters. Therefore 40/5=8 8*17=136 136 paged script. It is leaning on the long side. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
I am now on study leave, so after my exams I will finish my first draft of PS and edit it PROPERLY. (Can I emphasise that enough?)
Below is as far as I've got with the first draft: Please don't say that it is exactly like the boook. I know it is. I just haven't got round to cutting it yet.: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
Since Hagrid being expelled is more important to CoS:
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Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
About the death of Voldemort... I was actually thinking how this should be like.
BELLATRIX topples to the ground, and in slow-motion, Voldemort turns to watch her die. VOLDEMORT: NO!!! (not a cheesy "NO!" but a very scary, insane "NO!") He turns and waves the ELDER WAND, and tendrils of light spary everywhere, hurling MCGONGALL, SLUGHORN, AND SHACKLEBOLT over the Great Hall. VOLDEMORT turns to MOLLY, furious. HE raises the wand, and just as the Killing Curse was said, HARRY pulls the Cloak off. Now in regular motion. HARRY: PROTEGO! A massive shield explodes in the middle of the Hall, and as everybody turns to see who'd done it, HARRY steps out of the crowd. VOLDEMORT turns to see HARRY, and he hisses. The magical ceiling now turns to a deep violet color, and a hint (very slight) of the sun is starting to rise. It's very subtle. They start circling each other. The crowd stumbles backward, making a circle in the hall. Several DEATH EATERS Apparate between the people, turning in confusion. One of them looks at Voldemort, gestures, but with a look from VOLDEMORT, he clambers back in rank. VOLDEMORT: Harry Potter. So yet again, you escaped Death. HARRY: (raises a hand quickly) Don't help. It's got to be like this, just you and me. VOLDEMORT: You don't mean that, Potter. You snivel and hide behind the skirts of greater people, hiding away from me. HARRY: You thought so. But you're wrong. I did that to protect everybody, from your harm. Remember my mother, Lily? The blood she gave up protected me from you... until- VOLDEMORT: I came back! You're not protected anymore! HARRY: Yes, you're right... but don't you see? I've done the same thing... for everybody who've fought you tonight. You don't know anything, do you, Riddle? VOLDEMORT: (growls) You dare to- HARRY: Yes. You never learn from your mistakes, Tom Riddle. Now, before you make yet another mistake, try to feel remorse... VOLDEMORT: What is this? (looks shocked briefly) HARRY: I've seen what you will become. Be a man... VOLDEMORT: You're lying! I, Lord Voldemort, possesses the powerful wand ever to touch Wizarding history! We don't have that Phoenix core protection anymore, we duel on skills, alone! HARRY: Be careful. You think you're powerful? VOLDEMORT: I BROUGHT UPON THE DEATH OF ALBUS DUMBLEDORE! HARRY: You thought so, yet you're wrong. The crowd reacts, and whisperings start. They are cut off by VOLDEMORT. VOLDEMORT: He is dead, on this grounds, rotting in the tomb! I saw it myself! HARRY: He never got murdered. He made a fatal mistake and arranged the whole thing with the man you thought was your faithful servant... Severus Snape. He stopped working for you once you killed my mother... she was the only person Snape ever truly loved. VOLDEMORT: Silence! What does it matter, then, as both are dead! On my own doings! HARRY: Really? Well, when Malfoy disarmed Dumbledore on the evening he died... that wand you're holding, the master of that is Draco Malfoy. VOLDEMORT: I can attend to Draco after this! You speak nonsense, and you're stalling your death! HARRY: But... I overtook Malfoy weeks ago and took his wand. (holds up wand) Does that wand you hold know its master was disarmed? Because if it does... then I am the master of the Elder Wand. The sun finally rises, and the magical ceiling turns a shocking orange-yellow. VOLDEMORT: AVADA KEDVARA! HARRY: EXPELLARMIUS! The jets of the spells collides, then they breaks up. Shots of light bursts from the connected jet of light. Voldemort growls, but then he looks fearful- as the Elder Wand flicks away out of his hand- a green jet shot out- it hits Voldemort in the chest- a booming explosion echoes as Voldemort kneels. A moment, then suddenly jets of light burst from his chest. Voldemort's body withers, then his robe turns into smoke, and his body along disappears in a smoky fog. The Death Eaters panics, and attempts to Disapparate, but the Order quickly gathers them up. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
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I definately think that Voldemort's "No" can't be chessy. I actually think that the thread name is mis-leading, as not all the movies have actually been made yet. I think I'll change it (for the 10th time:lol:) Anyway, about my script. I've decided to write a treatment before continuing. Here's what I've done: PS Treatment: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter
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Otherwise, though, it's not bad at all. :tu: |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your version of Harry Potter
OK, I've done a rewrite of the following scene, though one line I really want to shorten and don't know how.
It's shorter than before (by two pages according to the page count): ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your version of Harry Potter
Thanks! I've edited the mentioned above.
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your version of Harry Potter
I've written a bit more of CoS, because I got tired of PS: ![]() I wanted to finish this before I posted, But I ran out of time... Ah, I love the fact that DH is out: ![]() From DH thread: Quote:
I should post my script in PDF, too. I gets annoying formatting it (centering dialogue and having spaces in between). Edit: I found a way of doing that here is my PS script (first 4 and a half chapters and a bit of chapter 8, clocking in at the moment at 42 pages) [Link no longer valid] |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
As part of my PS break I decided to do a chunk of GoF, only to figure out that it is twice too long. Oh, well, I'm not onto that yet, but what I have done (Now edited to include everything I've done.): ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
More of PS: ![]() |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Oh MY ArryGrotter have I been gone away from this thread this long? Wow I have a lot of catching up to do lol. I'll read through some of your scripts and I'll post the next section of my old HBP screenplay. Let me know what you think! Remember I wrote this LONG before the OOTP movie came out so a certain spell that was used in THAT movie is still here..just ignore it :p
INT. BOYS DORMITORY-THAT NIGHT The scene fades to a shot of Ron in the bed snoring. The camera then pans to Harry looking in his Advanced Potions book using his wand as a light. We see a shot of what Harry is reading and zooms in on the word ‘Levicorpus (nvbl)’ Harry mouths the words and then sits the book down. He grabs his wand and flicks it and there’s a flash of light. BOOM! We hear Ron screaming and the camera pans to him hanging upside down like there’s a hook holding his leg in midair. Dean and Seamus run over and begin to laugh. HARRY Oh..um…sorry Ron. Hang on…I’ll let you down… He grabs for his book and looks through the pages. He drops the book and points the wand at Ron. There’s a flash of light and Ron falls to his mattress. HARRY Sorry. RON (In an exhausted voice) Tomorrow, I’d rather you set the alarm clock. INT-HOGWARTS-THE GREAT HALL-MORNING The scene cuts to a shot of Hogwarts and follows an owl through the the Great Hall. The camera then pans down to Harry, Ron, and Hermione at the Gryffindor table. HERMIONE So you just decided to try out an unknown, handwritten incantation and see what would happen? HARRY Why does it matter if it’s handwritten? HERMIONE Because it’s probably not Ministry of Magic approved and also because I’m starting to think this Prince character was a bit dodgy. RON It was a laugh Hermione, that’s all. Calm down. You just don’t like the Prince because he’s better than you in Potions… Hermione It’s got nothing to do wih that! I just think its very irresponsible to start performing spells when you don’t even know what they’re for! Half Blood Prince, I bet it’s just a stupid nickname, and it doesn’t seem as though he’s a very nice person to me! Hundreds of Owls start to fly into the Great Hall carrying packages HARRY Hermione if he’d been a budding Death Eater he wouldn’t have been boasting about being ‘half-blood’ would he? HERMIONE The Death Eaters can’t all be pure blood, and I bet it’s only Muggle-borns they hate, they’d be quite happy to let you and Ron join up! RON There’s no way they’d let me be a Death Eater, my whole family are blood traitors! That’s as bad as Muggle-borns to them! HARRY And they’d love to have me, we’d be best pals if they didn’t keep trying to do me in. Hedwig lands a large package in front of Harry. Harry opens the pack and it’s a new copy of the Advanced Potion Making book HARRY Thanks Hedwig He pets Hedwig and she flies off back to the Owlery HERMIONE Oh good, now you can give that graffitied copy back. HARRY Are you mad? I’m keeping it! I’ll give Slughorn back the new one, he can’t complain. Hermione frowns and grabs the Daily Prophet and starts to read. RON Anyone we know dead? HERMIONE No, but there have been more dementor attacks and an arrest...Stan Stunpike. HARRY What?!? HERMIONE Yes, (The camera pans over here shoulder to show the glaring face of Stan Shunpike) Stanley Shunpike, conductor on the popular Wizarding conveyance the Knight Bus, has been arrested on suspicion of Death Eater activity. HARRY Stan Shunpike, a Death Eater? That’s not possible. RON He might have been under the Imperius Curse, you never can tell. HERMIONE This is horrible. Did you see today in Herbology? They called Hannah Abbott out of class to tell her that her mother was found dead. RON Yeah, things have been going crazy lately. People are terrified. The Patil twins’ parents want them to go home. HARRY What! But Hogwarts is safer than their homes, bound to be! We’ve got Aurors, and all those extra protective spells, and we’ve got Dumbledore! HERMIONE I don’t think we’ve got him all the time. Haven’t you noticed? His seat’s been empty an awful lot lately. Harry and Ron look up at the staff table and we see Dumbledore’s seat is empty. Professor Slughorn is walking down towards them. SLUGHORN Harry, Harry, just the man I was hoping to see! What do you say to a spot of supper tonight in my rooms? I hope very much that Miss Granger will favor me by coming too. HERMIONE Oh thanks…um… HARRY I can’t come, Professor. I’ve got a detention with Professor Snape. SLUGHORN Oh dear, I was counting on you, Harry! Well, now, I’ll just have to have a word with Severus and explain the situation. Yes, I’m sure I’ll see you both there. Slughorn walks away towards the staff table to talk to Snape and the scene cuts to… INT- CORRIDOR-DAY Harry, Hermione, and Ron walking to class and a young man named Cormac McLaggen walks up behind Harry and taps him on his shoulder. HARRY Yes? CORMAC We met on the train, in old Sluggy’s compartment. Cormac McLaggen, Keeper. Just wanted to introduce myself before trials today He looks at Ron and throws him a dirty look HARRY Right…well I guess I’ll see you then. CORMAC Yeah, and by the way Potter. You’ll go wrong not to pick me…(he walks away.) RON Who in the bloody hell does he think he is? I hope he doesn’t think he’ll get special treatment because you’re both some of Slughorns favorites! HARRY A lot of people have signed up for Quidditch this year. I dunno why the team’s this popular all of a sudden HERMIONE It’s not the Quidditch Harry…it’s you. You’ve never been more interesting, and frankly, you’ve never been more fanciable Snape walks towards them and stops when he see’s Harry SNAPE You are to be in my office at half past eight tonight to do your detention Potter. No matter how many party invitations you have received. He sneers then walks away as … |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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Did you move Levicorpus earlier? I actually find that effective, that way there the whole Prince good/evil argement can start earlier. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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I see you've moved on past PS and have been dabbling in the other stories aswell lol. You're better than me..I've had writers block on my DH screenplay for...oh...3 months now and haven't touched it lol Yeah I moved Levicorpus up right after Harry's 1st lesson with Dumbledore....have to keep the tension up..and if I remember correctly I moved a few different Great Halls scenes into the one you just read....kills 40 birds with one boulder :cool: |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Well I've been doing a bit more on PS.
For anyone interested, I've been compelling changes/additions/etc. in a document, so one day I can look back at how much has changed since the first write (ie Post 1). Each change is shown with colour and even now that document is becoming a multi-coloured script. If you haven't guessed click this link to see it. (You might need flash or something to see it properly. I'm not entirely sure) |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Well in light of todays casting news I decided to add the next part of my old HBP screenplay that includes 3 of the newly casted members lol. I didn't want to actual show QUidditch so the following scene is the aftermath and don't worry, we won't be seeing that actual funeral for Aragog :)
EXT. QUIDDITCH STADIUM The scene fades to a shot of the Quidditch stadium. The camera then cranes down and we see that Quidditch tryouts have been held and Harry is announcing who’s made the team. HARRY Due to the fact that McLaggen only saved 4 and Ron saved 5 I think it’s only fair to award Ron the postion. McLaggen storms up to Harry CORMAC His sister didn’t really try. She gave him an easy save! HARRY Rubbish, that was the one he nearly missed. CORMAC Give me another go! HARRY No. Now if you don’t mind, get out of my face. Cormac frowns and storms off and we see Harry look at Ginny and smile. It is the first time he looks at Ginny this way, as if there’s something different about her. The camera zooms in on her and she smiles back as Dean comes and grabbes her by the hand and takes her away. We see the smile fade from Harry’s face and Ron walks up to him. RON I did alright didn’t I? HARRY Yeah and good thing to. Now I don’t have to deal with that McLaggen? Lavender Brown with one of her friends walk up to them. LAVENDER You were amazing Ron… RON Oh…thanks Lavender. LAVENDER See you around… (She grabs her friends arm and they walk away giggling.) RON What the bloody hell was that about? Ron and Harry look at each other and the scene cuts to EXT. OUTSIDE HAGRIDS HUT MOMENTS LATER Harry and Ron walking towards Hagrids Hut and the camera pans to a barrel full of what looked like foot long maggots, that are slimy, white, and writhing. RON Hagrid..hey…. (notices the slimey maggots). What the bloody hell are those? HAGRID Oh hey….Jus’ giant grubs RON And they grow into…? HAGRID They won’ grow inter nuthin’, I got em tter feed Aragog (He pauses and then starts to cry) HARRY Hagrid…what’s…. HAGRID It’s…him….Aragog…I think he’s dyin…I don’t know what I’ll do if he…if he….We’ve bin tergether so long… HARRY Hagrid I….is there anything we can do? HAGRID I don’ think so Harry, see the rest o’ the tribe, Aragog’s family…they’re getting a bit funny now he’s ill…bit restive… RON Yeah, I think we saw a bit of that side of them in our second year.... HAGRID I don’t reckon it’d be safe fer anyone but me ter go near the colony at the mo But thanks fer offerin, it means a lot… Hagrid walks away from them and the scene fades to' EXT. HOGSMEADE-DAY Hogsmeade. We see shots of different students going into various shops. INT-THREE BROOMSTICKS-DAY The camera pans to a shop named Honeydukes and goes inside where we see Harry, Ron, and Hermione drinking a Butterbeer. RON Wonderful HERMIONE Honestly Ron, we know you fancy her and all but… Hermione looks over at the bar and we see Madam Rosmerta making drinks for someone. RON What? No! You got it all wrong…I..ugh..was talking about the Butterbeer! HERMIONE We all know how much you fancy Madam Rosmerta Ron (She laughs) RON Jealous? HERMIONE Why….of course not (She clears her throat and looks at Harry to quickly change the subject.) Are you all right? You haven’t touched your Butterbeer? HARRY Yeah, it’s just that Slughorn is driving me mad, he keeps trying to get me to come to those parties. HERMIONE They’re not so bad, they’re even quite fun. RON Speaking of Slughorn… Slughorn walks into the pub and makes his way towards their table. SLUGHORN Harry m’boy! I can’t have you missing anymore of my little suppers. I’m determined to have you! Miss Granger loves them, don’t you? HERMIONE Yes, they’re really… SLUGHORN So why don’t you come along, Harry? HARRY Oh...I have Quidditch practice. SLUGHORN Well I certainly expect you to win your first match. Well, how about Monday night? HARRY Can’t, I have a meeting with Dumbledore SLUGHORN Unlucky again! You can’t evade me forever, Harry! He bows and walks away. RON He acts like I’m not even here, I’ve yet to get invited to these parties. HERMIONE Oh they’re not all they’re made up to be Ron. RON Yeah…right…you were just talking about how great they are! HERMIONE I did not! Oh honestly Ron you’re overreacting. Harry turns and looks out of the window as they continue to argue. He see’s Ginny and Dean walk by eating candy. He smiles slightly as… EXT- OUTSIDE OF HOGSMEADE The scene cuts to Harry, Ron, and Hermione walking back to school. There are two girls arguing in the background. Harry, Ron, and Hermione turn around to see what the fuss is about. It’s Katie Bell and Her friend Leanne. KATIE It’s nothing to do with you, Leanne! LEANNE Katie stop being a…. She reaches for the package that Katie is holding and Katie tugged it back and the package fell to the ground. All at once Katie rises in the air with her arms outstretched with her hair whipping around her by a feirce wind. Her eyes and closed and then she lets out a terrible scream. Her eyes open and Leanne begins to scream. She runs to Katie and tries to pull her down by her ankles. Harry, Ron, and Hermione run up to help and when they grab her she falls and Harry and Ron catches her. She’s shaking tremendously. They lower her to the ground and she’s thrasing and screaming. The scene cuts to Hagrid picking Katie up. HAGRID It’s ok, I’ll be taking her to the hospital wing. He walks away as she continues to scream. Hermione goes to comfort Leanne and Ron walks bends down and we see a shot of an ornate opal necklace that’s sticking out of the paper. He reaches down to grab it but Harry grabs his arm. HARRY Don’t touch it! I’ve seen this before, it was on display in Borgin and Burks ages ago. The label said it was cursed… Katie must have touched it. (He gets up and walks towards Leanne.) How did Katie get hold of this? LEANNE Well that’s why we were arguing. She came back from the bathroom in the Three Broomsticks holding it, said it was a surprise for somebody at Hogwarts and she had to deliver it. She looked all funny when she….oh no…I bet she’d been Imperiused and I didn’t realize! (She starts to cry in Hermione’s shoulder.) HERMIONE We’d better get up to school. HARRY She didn’t say who’d given it to her, Leanne? LEANNE No…she wouldn’t tell me. INT. McGONNAGELLS OFFICE-NIGHT The scene cuts to the Harry, Ron, and Hermione sitting in Professor McGonagalls office. PROFESSOR McGONAGALL So what happened when Katie touched the necklace? HARRY She rose up in the air and then bagan to scream, and collasped. Professor, can I see Professor Dumbledore, please? McGONAGALL The headmaster is away until Monday, Potter. HARRY Away? McGONAGALL Yes, Potter, away. But anything you have to say about this horrible business can be said to me, I’m sure! HARRY (He looks at both Ron and Hermione and back to McGonnagal.) I think Draco Malfoy gave Katie that necklace, Professor. McGONAGALL That is a very serious accusation, Potter. Do you have any proof? HARRY Well…no…but you must trust me. McGONAGALL Potter, you cannot point the finger of blame at Mr. Malfoy, he was not in Hogsmeade today. He was doing detention with me. And it might interest you to know Potter that Mr. Filch has set up Secrecy Sensors all over the school grounds. Any Dark object will be found, even the owls have extra security! Now if that is all, good day to you all! INT-MOVING STAIRCASE-NIGHT The scene cuts to the three of them walking towards their common room on the MOVING STAIRCASES RON Who do you think Katie was supposed to give the necklace to? HERMIONE Whoever it was has had a narrow escape don’t you think? No one could have opened that package without touching the necklace. HARRY It could’ve been meant for loads of people. Dumbledore, Slughorn…I wonder why Malfoy told her to take it into the castle. HERMIONE Harry, Malfoy wasn’t in Hogsmeade! HARRY He must have used an accomplice then. RON (Irritably) Oh drop it, Harry! HARRY Don’t take that tone with me! It’s not my fault Slughorn invited Hermione and me to his stupid party, neither of us wanted to go, you know? RON Well, as I’m not invited to any parties, I think I’ll go to bed. (He walks away from them angrily) HERMIONE Harry you should apologize. I know you’re convinced that Malfoys somehow at fault but he wasn’t there…. HARRY He is involved Hermione, and I’m going to find out how. She sighs knowing that there’s no point in arguing and The scene fades. Quote:
Oh Arry there is just SO much. I like some of the things but you have ALOT of things there. Why the prophecy at the beginning? You're introducing something that won't get brought up again until the 5th film and probably won't be resolved until the 6th. I mean it's an interesting concept and if this was a trilogy I'd say yeah good idea! It'll be interesting to see how your series shapes up though. What is the time limit you're giving yourself? Just remember Peter Jackson had to fight really hard to get LOTR that long and the thing LOTR had that Harry Potter doesn't are huge battles that lasted 20+ mins. Keep it up though it's very interesting. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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But "Bloody hell"? I hate that line. It doesn't seem Ron to me and it's overuse through out the movie series is annoying Quote:
The prophecy bit I added just to add mystery to the film, really. To add something that won't be resolved till later. I think this is important in a series. IMO, the real movies don't do this well. The important things for later get glossed over, and when they need remembering, you won't. (I'm not that good at writing out a point, so I hope you understand) I hope to finish at roughly 130 pages. I'm about 1/3 way through the book and about 1/3 way through the limit, so I'm kind of OK, but I think the bulk of the pages will probably go to the last chapters, so then I'll be in trouble. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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And I see your point. The thing about the real movies is when the 1st one was done only 4 book were out right? (Or was it 3) so they couldn't really foreshadow with the whole prophecy thing seeing that they didn't know about it lol. I mean it is interesting but I just feels it's to much. 130 pages huh? Interesting...that means you're going to have to adapt your butt off as you get near the end of the story. Just remember focus on what's important...merge scenes...move things around to have a nice flow going. Do you plan on writing a Quidditch game? |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
I probably will make a shorter Quidditch scene than in the real movie. I.e. jumping straight to when Harry is jinxed
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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INT. ORPHANAGE-MIDDAY (SIXTY YEARS AGO) The scene fades to a shot of an old ORPHANAGE. The scene cuts to the back of MRS. COLE head as she writes something. There is a creak at the door and she looks up to see Dumbledore walking towards a woman. The camera pans over to his right and we see modern day Harry and Dumbledore walking behind him. HARRY Nice suit, sir. DUMBLEDORE Why thank you. YOUNG DUMBLEDORE Hello, my name is Albus Dumbledore. I am a teacher and I have come to offer Tom a place at my school. MRS. COLE And how come you’re interested in Tom? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE We believe he has qualities we are looking for. (He takes out a slip of paper.) I think this will make everything clear. (Mrs. Cole grabs the parchment and looks over it.) MRS. COLE This looks in order; may I offer you a glass of gin? INT-MRS. COLE’S OFFICE-MIDDAY(MOMENTS LATER) YOUNG DUMBLEDORE I was wondering whether you could tell me anything of Tom Riddle’s history? I think he was born here in the orphanage? MRS. COLE That’s right, it was a nasty night. (There is a FLASH and the scene plays out as she talks. We see Merope running, pregnant, in the rain towards the orphanage and pushes the door open) This girl, not much older than I was myself at the time, came and we took her in. (Merope is now in the bed screaming in pain as young Mrs. Cole wipes a wet towel over her head and a baby is brought into the frame and sat on her chest) She had the baby in an hour and she was dead in another hour. She told me he was to be named Tom for his father, and Marvolo, for her father and his surname was to be Riddle. (As she says this we see Merope take her final breath and die. Young Mrs. Cole picks up the baby and there is a shot of the baby looking up at her. Not crying just silent.) She died soon after that without another word. (There is another FLASH as we're back to modern day and she takes a sip of gin) He’s a funny boy. YOUNG DUMBLEDORE Oh really, how so? MRS. COLE He’s definitely got a place at your school you say? And nothing I can say will change that? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE Nothing. MRS. COLE Well…he scares the other children. YOUNG DUMBLEDORE You mean he’s a bully? MRS. COLE I think he must be but it’s very hard to catch him at it. For instance we took them out once to the seaside for a summer outing. Amy Benson and Dennis Bishop were never quite right afterwards, and all we ever got out of them was that they’d gone into a cave with Tom Riddle. DUMBLEDORE A cave? MRS. COLE Yes and he swore they’d just gone exploring, but something happened in there, I’m sure of it. INT-TOM’S BEDROOM-MIDDAY (MOMENTS LATER) The scene cuts to Mrs. Cole opening a door and walking in. Old Dumbledore follows as does Modern Dumbledore and Harry. We see sitting on the bed a young boy, A young Tom Riddle. MRS. COLE Tom you’ve got a visitor. This is Mr. Dumberton…sorry, Dunderbore. (She turns to Dumbledore) Call me when you’re done. Mrs. Cole exits YOUNG DUMBLEDORE How do you do, Tom? I am Professor Dumbledore. TOM Professor? What are you here for? Did she get you in to have a look at me? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE No, in fact I contacted her. TOM I don’t believe you. She wants me looked at, doesn’t she? Tell the truth! YOUNG DUMBLEDORE I have no reason to lie to you Tom and please watch your tone. I work at a school called Hogwarts. I have come to offer you a place at my school, if you would like to come. TOM You’re from the asylum aren’t you? That old cat’s the one who should be in the asylum. I never did anything to little Amy Benson or Dennis Bishop, you can ask them! YOUNG DUMBLEDORE I am not from the asylum. Hogwarts is a school for people with special abilities… TOM I’M NOT MAD! YOUNG DUMBLEDORE I know that you are not mad. Hogwarts is not a school for mad people. It is a school of magic. TOM (With a stunned look on his face.) Magic…it’s magic what I can do? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE What is it that you can do? TOM (Excited) All sorts. I can make things move without touching them. I can make animals do what I want them to do, without training them. I can make bad things happen to people who annoy me. I can make them hurt if I want to. I knew I was different, I knew I was special. HARRY Wow, he believed it much quicker than I did sir. DUMBLDORE Yes, Tom was perfectly ready to believe that he was special. TOM Are you a wizard too? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE Yes, I am. TOM Prove it. YOUNG DUMBLEDORE If, as I take it, you are accepting your place at Hogwarts…. TOM Of course I am! YOUNG DUMBLEDORE Then you are to address me as ‘Professor’ or ‘sir’ Dumbledore takes out his wand and points in at the wardrobe in the corner. BANG! It bursts into flame. Tom stares with excitement in his eyes and Dumbledore waves his wand again and its back to normal. TOM Where can I get one of them? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE All in good time, I think there is something trying to get out of your wardrobe. Open the door. Tom hesitates and then walks over and opens the wardrobe door. He pulls out a cardboard box that is shaking. He opens it and it’s has a yo yo, a silver thimble, and a tarnished mouth organ in it. DUMBLEDORE Notice how Tom likes to collect trophies Harry. Those items in that box were taken from victims of his bullying behavior, souvenirs, if you will, of particulary unpleasant bits of magic. Bare in mind this magpie like tendency, for this, particularly, will be important later. YOUNG DUMBLEDORE Is there anything in that box that you ought not to have? TOM I suppose so, sir. YOUNG DUMBLEDORE You are to return them to their owners with your apologies. And be warned: Thieving is not tolerated at Hogwarts. Hogwarts can expel students and the Ministry of Magic will punish lawbreakers. All new wizards must accept that, in entering our world, they abide by our laws. TOM Yes, sir. There’s one problem though… I don’t have any money. YOUNG DUMBLEDORE There is a fund at Hogwarts for those who require assistance to buy books and robes. TOM Where do you buy spellbooks? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE In Diagon Alley, I can help you find everything… TOM I don’t need you, I’m used to doing things for myself. How do you get to this Diagon Alley…sir? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE You will be able to see it. Ask for Tom the barman… (Tom frowns when the name Tom is said.) You dislike the name ‘Tom’? TOM There are a lot of Toms. DUMBLEDORE As you just saw Harry, he hated anything that tied him to other people, anything that made him ordinary. He shed his name, as you know, within a few short years of this and created the mask of ‘Lord Voldemort’ behind which he has been hidden for so long. TOM When do I come to this Hogwarts? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE All the details are there Tom. You will leave from King’s Cross-station on the first of September. TOM I can speak to snakes. Is that normal for a wizard? YOUNG DUMBLEDORE It is unusual, but not unheard of. (HE turns and walks towards the door.) Good bye Tom…I shall see you in Hogwarts. The scene shows a shot of Tom looking at Dumbledore. The camera then pans back through the door and slams. INT-COURTYARD-EVENING (NEXT DAY) The scene cuts to Harry, Hermione, and Ron walking outside of Hogwarts in the courtyard. RON I still don’t get why Dumbledore’s showing you all this. I mean, what’s the point? HERMIONE I think it’s fascinating actually. It makes total sense to know as much about Voldemort as possible, how else will you find out his weaknesses? RON So how was Slughorn’s latest party? HERMIONE It was quite fun actually. I mean he drones on about famouse ex pupils a bit, and he absolutely fawns over McLaggen because he’s so well connected, but it was really nice. RON Oh yeah such a great thing to spend an evening with McLaggen huh Hermione. HERMIONE Jealous? RON Well I…. HERMIONE Anyways, he’s going to have a Christmas party and Harry there’s no way to wiggle out of this one because he actually asked me to check your free evenings, so he could be sure to have it on a night you could come. HARRY Excellent, thanks Hermione RON And this is another party just for Slughorns favorites, isn’t it? HERMIONE The Slug Club, yes. RON Slug Club! That’s pathetic. Well I hope you enjoy the party Hermione, why don’t you try hooking up with McLaggen, you guys could be King and Queen Slug. (He and Harry laugh) HERMIONE Well we are allowed to bring guests and I was going to ask you to come, but if you think it’s stupid then I won’t bother. RON (With a slight blush and amazed look on his face) You…. were going to ask me? HERMIONE Yes, but obviously if you’d rather I hooked up with McLaggen RON No..um what I meant was… HERMIONE I’m off to the library, see you two. (She walks away with a slight smile on her face) RON Was she serious? Do you think she was serious? Or was she just…you know… HARRY Oh Ron, you act like you actually want to go to Slughorns party. RON Oh…me..no…I mean…unless she asked me of course. But then I’ll be going just to be a good friend, not that I’ll enjoy it or anything. HARRY (Laughing) You’re pathetic (They turn around and corner and see Ginny and Dean kissing.) RON What the…(They stop kissing.) GINNY What? RON I don’t want to find my own sister snogging people in public. DEAN C’mon Ginny lets go back to the common room… GINNY You go, I want a word with my dear brother! (He kisses her on the cheek and walks away.) Lets get this straight once and for all. It is none of your business who I go out with or what I do with them, Ron… RON Yeah, it is! D’you think I want people saying my sister’s a… GINNY A what exactly? HARRY He doesn’t mean anything, Ginny… GINNY Oh yes he does! Just because he’s never snogged anyone in his life, just because the best kiss he’s ever had is from our Auntie Muriel… RON Shut your mouth! GINNY No, I will not! If you went out and got a bit of snogging done yourself, you wouldn’t mind so much that everyone else does it! RON (He pulls his wand out) You don’t know what you’re talking about! (Harry jumps between them) Just because I don’t do it in public!! GINNY Oh come off it Ron! Or have you got a picture of Auntie Muriel stashed under your pillow? A streak of orange light flies from his wand and BANG! it hits the wall beside Ginny’s head. Harry grabs his and pushes him against the wall. HARRY Don’t be stupid… GINNY (Near Tears) Harry’s snogged Cho Chang and Hermione snogged Victor Krum, it’s only you who acts like it’s something disgusting, Ron, and that’s because you’ve got as much experience of a six year old! She turns around and storms off. Ron puts his wand away. HARRY You ok? RON Yeah, she’s just being stupid. (They start to walk.) Um Harry? D’you think Hermione really snogged Krum? HARRY Oh…um…look at the time gotta go He runs off leaving Ron with a confused look on his face as the scene cuts to…. |
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I like how you moved the aftermath of the Penseive into the Penseive (Though I do miss "The mouth organ was only ever a mouth organ") And next comes some of my favourite scenes, though I am dissapointed with the scene move (Herbology>Courtyard, etc.) and that is sure to happen in the real HBP. This is just personal choice, but in the UK ed, Ron/Hermione say "got off with McClaggen" instead of "hook up with McClaggen" and, IMO, I'd preferr "got off", mainly because its the UK way. "Look at the time" was so cheesy! Worst line ever! I can't wait to see you write the party. |
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Oh come on! It isn't as cheesy as 'I love magic' is it?!?! lol Well what's a Harry Potter film without a little cheese huh? Thanks for the UK reference because I honestly have no idea (Like Kloves huh? :p) Since it's the holiday season I decided instead of waiting another month I'd post the party scene for you enjoyment. Plus I have to make up time since I disappeared for a few months lol. So here is the next section of the script and I'm sure you're going to have plenty of comments for this one lol. (Hopefully it's not full of cheese :err:) INT-CORRIDOR/GRYFFINDOR COMMON ROOM-NIGHT (SAME DAY) Harry walking down the corrider leaving Detention with Snape. He walks into the common room and we see Ginny walk up towards him from the crowd in the middle of the room. HARRY Hey Ginny. Have you seen… GINNY Looking for Ron? He’s over there, the filthy hypocrite. Ron and Lavender Brown are sitting in a chair kissing heavily GINNY It looks like he’s eating her face, but I suppose he’s got to refine his technique somehow huh? Harry chuckles as Ginny walks off to join Dean as Hermione comes through the portrait into the common room and see’s Ron and Lavender and stops in her tracks. She turns around quickly and walks out. Harry looks over at where she was and follows. INT-CLASSROOM-NIGHT (MOMENTS LATER) Harry walks into the classroom where Hermione is sitting alone. She has a small ring of yellow birds circling her head. HARRY Hermione? HERMIONE Oh, hello Harry. I was just practicing. HARRY They’re really good. HERMIONE Thanks… HARRY Are you alright? Before she could answer the door opens and Ron and Lavender run in holding hands and laughing. RON Oh…. LAVENDER Oops She laughs, kisses Ron, and walks out of the room. There is an awkward silence for a second. RON Hi, Harry! Wondered where you’d got to! Hermione stands up and the birds are still circling her head. HERMIONE You shouldn’t leave Lavender waiting outside. (She walks slowly towards the door. Harry and Ron both look at each other. Hermione stops at the entrance of the door and turns around.) Oppugno!!! She points her wand at Ron and the birds all sped towards Ron and start pecking and clawing at him. He starts to scream and try and get them out of his face. She smiles a little and walks out of them room. INT-THE GREAT HALL-DAY Ron and Harry are sitting in the Great Hall. Harry is reading a book. While Ron is talking its clear that Harry is ignoring him. RON She can’t complain she snogged Krum. I never promised Hermione anything. I mean, alright, I was going to go to Slughorns Christmas party with her, but just as friends…I’m a free agent. INT-GREAT HALL-LATER THAT DAY The camera pans over and now it’s just Harry and Hermione sitting in the Great Hall. He’s reading his Advanced Potions book. HERMIONE He’s at perfect liberty to kiss whomever he likes! I really couldn’t care less. She starts to write something furiously on the parchment in front of her. INT. POTIONS CLASS (DAY)/GREAT HALL(AFTERNOON)/CORRIDOR(NIGHT) The camera cuts to them in class and we see a shot of Ron and Lavender. He raises his hand mocking how Hermione always does. Harry looks at this then turns to look at Hermione who gets up and walks out of the room furiously. Now Ron and Harry are sitting in the Great Hall eating dinner and Hermione comes over and throws a pie in Rons face and storms off. The scene cuts again to Harry and Hermione walking down the hallways of Hogwarts. HERMIONE Harry, you need to be careful. HARRY I’m not giving the book back Hermione. HERMIONE I’m not talking about your stupid so-called Prince Harry. I went into the girl’s bathroom just before I came in here and I overheard Romilda Vane talking to some of her friends. They’re all hoping you’re going to take them to Slughorn’s party, and they all seem to have bought Fred and George’s love potions.. I’d just invite someone to go with if I was you. HARRY There isn’t anyone I want to invite. HERMIONE Well just be careful what you drink. INT-MOVING STAIRWAY-SECONDS LATER They start walking up the stairs towards the Common Room. HARRY Hang on, I thought Filch banned anything bought at Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes? How come these girls are able to bring love potions into school? HERMIONE Fred and George send them disguised as perfumes and cough potions. HARRY So if these girls are getting stuff into the school disguised as something else, why wouldn’t Malfoy have… HERMIONE Oh Harry please, not that again. Secrecy Sensors detect jinxes, curses, and concealment charms. They’re used to find Dark Magic and Dark objects. Love potions aren’t Dark or dangerous… HARRY Easy for you to say… (They stop in front of the Fat Lady) Baubles! FAT LADY Same to you… The portrait swings open they walk into the common room and Romilda Vane looks up at them and turns to grab something from one of her friends and runs up to them. ROMILDA Hi Harry! Fancy a gillywater? Hermione casts an ‘I told you so’ look to Harry. HARRY No thanks; I don’t like it much. ROMILDA Well, take these anyway (She thrusts a box into his hands.) Chocolate Cauldrons, they’ve got firewhisky in them. My gran sent them to me, but I don’t like them. HARRY Oh, thanks a lot. Romilda smiles and walks back to her group of giggling friends HERMIONE Pathetic what some girls would do for a boy. Oh well I’m off to do more things to make Ron jealous. As she walks away Harry casts an “I don’t think I’ll ever understand girls” look and INT-BRIDGE-MIDDAY The scene cuts to shot of Hogwarts covered in snow. Harry standing outside on the bridge with Hedwig and we see him looking at Ginny and Dean playing in the snow together. HARRY Am I being pathetic Hedwig, I mean she’s my best friends sister. How do you think Ron would react? (Hedwig hoots) Yeah you’re right…I mean she’s like a little sister, but there seems to be something…more. (Hedwig hoots and Luna walks up next to him.) LUNA Hiya Harry! HARRY Oh hey Luna, how has your term been going? LUNA Oh it’s been all right. A bit lonely without the D.A. Ginny’s been nice, though and I just ran into Hermione, she seems a bit upset. She said something about that Ron Weasley…. HARRY Yeah, they’ve had a row. LUNA He says very funny things sometimes, doesn’t he? But he can be a bit unkind, I noticed that last year. HARRY I suppose. Hey…Luna…how would you like to come to Slughorn’s party with me? LUNA (shocked) Slughorn’s party? With you? HARRY Yeah. We’re supposed to bring guests, so I thought you might like…I mean just as friends, you know? But if you don’t want to… LUNA Oh, no, I’d love to go with you as friends! Nobody’s ever asked me to a party before, as a friend! HARRY Right, so I’ll meet you in the entrance hall at eight o’ clock then. Luna smiles and skips off and … INT-THE GREAT HALL-EVENING The scene cuts to them in the Great Hall where there are Christmas decorations set up and a few elves singing Christmas songs. RON You’re taking Loony Lovegood! GINNY Don’t call her that Ron! I’m really glad you’re taking her Harry, she’s so excited. (She walks over and sits with Dean and we see a shot of Hermione sitting down by herself at the end of the table. Parvati walks up to them.) PARVATI Hi, Harry. HARRY Hey, you’re staying at Hogwarts then? I heard your parents wanted you to leave. PARVATI I managed to talk them out of it for the time being. (Hermione walks past them.) Oh, hi Hermione! HERMIONE Hi, Parvati! Are you going to Slughorn’s party tonight? PARVATI No invite, you’re going aren’t you? HERMIONE Yes, I’m meeting Cormac McLaggen at eight. (We see a shot of Ron turning around furiously and looking at her.) PARVATI Oh really? Are you going out with him, then? HERMIONE Oh…yes…didn’t you know? PARVATI No! Wow, you like your Quidditch players don’t you? First Krum, then McLaggen… HERMIONE I like really good Quidditch players. (Ron frowns and furiously starts to eat his food) Well I’m off to the library. (She walks off and we see her smile and the scene cuts to… INT. SLUGHORNS PARTY-NIGHT The scene cuts to Slughorns party. There are teachers and students walking around and talking to each other. The camera pans to Harry and Luna walking into the room and Slughorn walks up to them SLUGHORN Harry, mboy! Welcome welcome. I’m glad to see you here! HARRY Yeah, thanks. (He notices Hermione over in the corner.) Oh, sorry sir I have to go see about a friend. (He grabs Luna’s arm and they walk over to Hermione.) Hermione? HERMIONE Harry! Thank goodness, Hi Luna! HARRY What happened to you? HERMIONE Oh, I’ve just escaped…I mean, I’ve just left Cormac. Under the mistletoe… HARRY Serves you right for coming with him. HERMIONE I thought he’d annoy Ron most. He makes Grawp look like a gentleman. Let’s go this way, we’ll be able to see him coming (The three of them walk across the room towards Professor Trelawney.) LUNA Hello Professor. TRELAWNY Good evening, my dear. I haven’t seen you in my classes lately… Harry turns to Hermione as Trelawney talks to Luna HERMIONE Do you see him? HARRY Yeah, as a matter of fact he’s coming this way HERMIONE Oh no! (She ducks down and runs as McLaggen walks up to Harry and Luna.) CORMAC Potter! HARRY What do you want? CORMAC Hermione! (Harry stares at him.) I mean have you seen her? HARRY No (Cormac gives Harry a slight frown and walks away. Harry turns to see Hermione sticking her head out from behind the wall. She mouths 'thank you' and ducsk again. Harry laughs then he turns around to Luna and Trelawney’s conversation.) TRELAWNY Harry Potter! My dear boy! The rumors! The stories! The Chosen One! Of course, I have known for a very long time. Why have you not returned to Divination? HARRY Well…um… (Slughorn walks up to them and Harry for the first time acts as if he’s g lad to see him there) SLUGHORN Harry m’boy are you avoiding me? HARRY Um…no sir… SLUGHORN How are you Sybill? TRELAWNY Just fine thanks, just here wondering why Potter didn’t return to Divination, the subject is very important, especially for him. SLUGHORN We all think our subjects are important…ahhh Severus! Come and join us! (The camera pans to Snape who was talking to another teacher. He turns and walks towards them.) SLUGHORN Have I told you about Harry’s exceptional potion making? Some credit must go to you, of course, you taught him for five years! SNAPE Funny, I never had the impression that I managed to teach Potter anything at all. SLUGHORN Well, it’s natural ability. You should have seen what he gave me, first lesson, Draught of Living Death…not even you managed it on your first attempt Severus. SNAPE Really? (He casts a look at Harry.) SLUGHORN What other subjects are you taking m’boy? HARRY Well…there’s Defense Against the Dark Arts, Charms, Transfiguration… SNAPE All the subjects required, in short for an Auror. HARRY Yeah, well, that’s what I want to do. LUNA I don’t think you should be an Auror Harry. They are a part of the Rotfang Conspiracy. They’re working to bring down the Ministry of Magic from within using a combination of Dark Magic and gum disease. (They all stare at her and we see Filch walk up holding Malfoy by the ear.) FILCH Professor Slughorn, I discovered this boy lurking in an upstairs corridor. He claims to have been invited to your party and to have been delayed in setting out? MALFOY All right, I wasn’t invited! I was trying to gatecrash, happy? FILCH No, I’m not! You’re in trouble, you are! SLUGHORN That’s all right, Argus. It’s Christmas, and it’s not a crime to want to come to a party. We’ll forget any punishment and you may stay, Draco. (Filch gives an angry grunt and storms off.) SNAPE I’d like a word with you, Draco. SLUGHORN Oh, now, Severus it’s Christmas, don’t be too hard… SNAPE I’m his Head of House, and I shall decide how hard, or otherwise, to be. Follow me, Draco. (Snape turns and walks away and Malfoy follows him.) HARRY Um..Luna…I’ll be back in a bit…bathroom. LUNA All right. TRELAWNY So dear, tell me more about this Rotfang Conspiracy… INT-HALLLWAY-NIGHT (MOMENTS LATER) Harry walks out of the room into the dark quite corridor. He pulls out his Invisibility Cloak and throws it over himself. He then walks slowly down the hall and turns to corner and see’s Snape and Draco standing there. SNAPE You cannot afford mistakes, Draco, because if you are expelled… DRACO I didn’t have anything to do with it, all right? SNAPE I hope you are telling the truth, because it was both clumsy and foolish. Already you are suspected of having a hand in it. DRACO Who suspects me? For the last time, I didn’t do it, okay? SNAPE Ah…Aunt Bellatrix has been teaching you Occlumency, I see. What thoughts are you trying to conceal from your master, Draco? DRACO I’m not trying to conceal anything; I just don’t want you butting in! SNAPE Listen to me; I am trying to help you. I made the Unbreakable Vow, Draco… DRACO Looks like you’ll have to break it then, because I don’t need your protection. I’ve got a plan and it’s going to work! SNAPE What is your plan? DRACO It’s none of your business! SNAPE Draco I can assist you… DRACO I’ve got all the assitance I need thanks, I’m not alone! SNAPE You were certainly alone tonight… DRACO I would’ve had Crabbe and Goyle if you hadn’t put them in detention! SNAPE If your friends intend to pass their Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L… DRACO What does it matter? It’s all a joke, an act. Like any of us need protecting against the Dark Arts… SNAPE It is an act that is crucial to success Draco! Confide in me and I can… DRACO I know what you’re up to! You want to steal my glory! SNAPE You are speaking like a child! I quite understand that your fathers capture and imprisonment has upset you, but… Draco walks away immediately from Snape. Harry stands very still as he walks by. We see a shot of Snape watching Draco walk away and he returns back to the direction the party. We see a look of shock on Harry’s face and the scene fades… |
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The above is probably a bit too negative. Sorry. Can I just say I'm really happy that someone else is participating in this thread and it is great to see other peoples work. |
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And no worries you're not harsh trust me. It's your opinion and the reason this thread is here is for other fans opinions on your work. I'm glad you're so honest, keep it up! (Just don't make me cry...) Quote:
Oooohhhh you know what I just thought? Maybe I could come up with something that has spiders involved? :scared: Quote:
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And no problems I like this thread because you're really the only other person, besides myself, that has read this script and I'm SO happy to hear what someone else thinks. |
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"There seems to be something more..." (Luna skips dreamily into veiw) Also think of the many times the bridge scene in GoF of Harry and Hermione has been bash because it can perceive a H/Hr relationship. Quote:
I just didn't like those elfs singing... They shoud be paid overtime for that! :lol: Quote:
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But no overpay for the elves darn it! Fine..I'll have the frogs from POA sing it then :p Quote:
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:p:p kidding |
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After that lengthly dicussion of the Party.....
I did this in the last week. It is horrible. I don't know how to fix it, but Iwant to keep it.... Quote:
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Ok.....first things first. Did you REALLY need to have Harry go back to the Dursley's to ask for a ride? You are really packing it on thick if you want this is to be 130 buddy.
That's alot of talking involved on the Weasley's part aswell. I chuckled at the whole 'toilet' thing though. I'd forgetten about that line (I haven't read the 1st book in a WHILE!!) You really are trying your best to stick to cannon though I'll give you that. |
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About the Weasleys: I KNOW!!!! I couldn't believe how much they talked! What I do usually is reformat the book, remove unneccecary lines, then move things round for my liking. And still, after that their dialogue was 2 or 3 pages!!! About the 130, I want to finish it first, no matter how long it is (I'm thinking it will come out between 150 and 200), and then I want to make it 130. Edit: About the Dursleys: Here's the edited scene, and it flows better than the previous one. Quote:
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Okay, I've never done anything like this before but I am curently working on my own HBP script so I figured I'd give a shot at posting my first scene and see what reaction I get. I wanna say right now, too, Phrozenone, I had the same thought about S.P.E.W. When I come to reintroducing Dobby ('cause I so wanna see Dobby again) I intend to have a little moment of outrage from Hermione about house elves working at Hogwarts, and carry that through as a little running joke rather than a subplot. But, for now, here's my take on "Spinner's End". For the love of God, be gentle! :lol:
The Warner Bros. logo moves forward out of an oddly insistent greenish mist that renders everything but an odd chimney or two invisible to our eyes. Pan down from an immense chimney to a decrepit, rundown old house sitting amidst several other similar ramshackle homes, next to a filthy, rubbish-strewn river. We enter the sitting room of this house through the window to meet SEVERUS SNAPE, who shuts the curtains with a sharp tug and turns to face the visitor standing in front of a dirtied, threadbare sofa. This woman, with pale, pointed features, her long blonde hair a very troubled, anxious-looking woman with long blonde hair falling over a tear-stained face, wears a very anxious and deeply troubled expression. SNAPE Well, this is a pleasant surprise. What brings you two to the family home? The sitting room of "the family home" continues the air of longtime neglect, being comprised of full, musty bookshelves, a lone wooden armchair, an empty fireplace at the room's rear, and a dim ceiling-hung lamp. WOMAN Severus, I need your help. We can just see a woman standing at the front door with her hood still up, her face obscured. WOMAN #2 Cissy, you should not speaking of the plan to anyone, let alone present company! The voice belongs to BELLATRIX LESTRANGE, who lowers her hood and steps away from the door toward her sister. CISSY Bella, please! SNAPE Now now, Narcissa, we should allow Bellatrix a chance to convey her...mistrust in me. "Present company"? You doubt I can aid your sister? BELLATRIX I doubt my sister's judgment in placing her trust in a man who's spent the last 17 years in Dumbledore's pocket! Tell me, Snape, where do your loyalties lie? SNAPE You mean this (lifting up his sleeve to show The Dark Mark branded into his arm) is not sufficient answer? BELLATRIX Not as to why you've made your home at Hogwarts, not as to why you did not immediately return to The Dark Lord's side after he was reborn! SNAPE I have remained at Hogwarts because The Dark Lord wished me to do so - or do you forget the assignment I was given all those years ago? And I returned precisely two hours after The Dark Lord did, on Dumbledore's orders. BELLATRIX Dumbledore's orders? SNAPE Yes. Or do you also forget the old man thought me his spy? He believes I've reclaimed the post I held during the first war, but the truth is quite the reverse. Either way, when The Dark Lord returned I had 16 years of valuable information on Hogwarts and Dumbledore himself to give him. Rather more valuable, I think, than endless stories of how very miserable Azkaban is - 'though I'm sure he appreciated them just the same. BELLATRIX Alright then, answer me this: you have had Harry Potter under your watch for 5 years and yet you have never made the slightest attempt - SNAPE Potter is Dumbledore's prize pupil. It might just be a bit onspicuous if I were to murder the boy over breakfast in The Great Hall; besides, The Dark Lord has made it clear that he wants Potter for himself. (beat) The Dark Lord trusts my judgment; you doubt his? Bellatrix wears a scathing look but says no more. SNAPE Now Narcissa, you seek my help? NARCISSA It's my son. The Dark Lord has..has given him a mission. SNAPE Yes, I know of the plan. NARCISSA (a pleading look on her face) Then you know you must help! Severus, please; you are his favorite teacher, he trusts you, you must protect him! BELLATRIX The boy needs no protection! You should be proud! NARCISSA Proud?! It is only punishment for what happened at the Ministry, I know it! Severus, I must know...will you assist him, watch over him..complete his task if he cannot? Snape seems to be contemplating this for a moment but says quite firmly: SNAPE I will. So that's it. I cut The Unbreakable Vow because, as others on other threads have said, it's rather irrelevant after 'DH' and besides, Snape will bring it up later anyway. What's here is a bit rough to be sure, but this is basically what I'd like to see next November. So what do you think? |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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And honestly they never said Hedwig's name in the movie so just having Harry call the name sometime in the film works just as well. :tu::tu: So since it's technically a new day here now I might aswell add another scene to the bunch: INT-THE BURROW-KITCHEN-MORNING To a snowy shot of the Burrow, then the scene changes to Harry and Ron chopping things in the kitchen sink. RON So Snape was definitely offering to help him? HARRY He said he’s promised Malfoy’s mother to protect him, that he’d made an Unbreakable Oath or something… RON An Unbreakable Vow? Are you sure? HARRY Yes, what does it mean? RON Well you can’t break an Unbreakable Vow… HARRY I’d worked that much out for myself, funnily enough. RON If you break it you die. Fred and George tried to get me to make one when I was five actually… Fred and George enter the kitchen as he says this. GEORGE Well well well Ron FRED What is this we hear from Ginny about you and a young lady called…unless our information is faulty…Lavender Brown? RON Mind your own business! FRED AND GEORGE Ooohhhhhhhhhhh FRED Seems we’ve struck a nerve. GEORGE What we want to know however little brother is how did it happen? FRED Did she have an accident or something? RON What? GEORGE Well, how did she sustain such extensive brain damage. (Ron throws the knife at George and he turns it into an paper airplane immediately. Mrs. Weasley walks in on this exact moment.) Careful, now! MRS. WEASLEY RONALD WEASLEY!!! Don’t you EVER let me see you throwing knives again! GEORGE IT’s ok mum he’s just a little love struck RON Shut up! INT. -DEN-MORNING (LATER THAT DAY) The scene cuts to Lupin, Mr. Weasley, and Harry sitting around the fireplace as Christmas music plays in the background. HARRY And that’s what happened. MR. WEASLEY Has it occurred to you, Harry that Snape was simply pretending...? HARRY Pretending to offer help so he can find out what Malfoy’s up to? Yeah, I thought you’d say that, but how do we know? MR. WEASLEY It isn’t out business to know. Dumbledore trusts Severus, and that ought to be good enough for all of us. HARRY But just say Dumbledore’s wrong about Snape… LUPIN People have said it many times Harry. It comes down to whether or not you trust Dumbledore’s judgement. HARRY But Dumbledore can make mistakes. He says it himself, and sir do you honestly trust Snape? LUPIN I neither like nor dislike Severus. We shall never be friends, but I do not forget that during the year at Hogwarts, Severus made the Wolfsbane Potion for me every month, so that I did not have to suffer as I usually do at the full moon. He kept me healthy, I must be grateful. HARRY Maybe he didn’t dare mess with the potion with Dumbledore watching him! LUPIN You are determined to hate him aren’t you Harry? There is a crash heard from in the kitchen and we hear Mrs. Weasley yelling at the twins. MR. WEASLEY I think I’m needed in this situation… (He jumps up and runs out of the room) HARRY (laughs and turns to Lupin) So what have you been up to lately? LUPIN Oh, I’ve been underground. I’ve been living among the werewolves; nearly all of them are on Voldemort’s side. Dumbledore wanted a spy and here I was…ready made. HARRY How come they like Voldemort? LUPIN They think that, under his rule, they will have a better life. And it is hard to argue with Greyback out there… HARRY Greyback? LUPIN Fenrir Greyback is the most savage werewolf alive today. He regards it his mission in life to bite and contaminate as many people as possible, sometimes even without the full moon. Voldemort has promised him prey in return for his services. Greyback specializes in children; it was Greyback who bit me. HARRY What? When you were a kid? LUPIN Yes. My father had offended him. INT-RONS BEDROOM-CHRISTMAS MORNING The scene cuts to another snowy shot of the Burrow and we hear hear Rons voice and then the scene pops in with him holding up a thick gold chain. RON She’s got to be joking! HARRY What’s that? RON Its from Lavender, she can’t honestly think I’d wear… He turns the chain around and it reads My Sweetheart. HARRY Nice, you should definitely wear it in front of Fred and George. RON If you tell them..I…I…I’ll… HARRY Stutter at me? (He laughs and picks up his package and we see that it says To Master, From Kreacher.) Do you reckon this is safe to open? RON Can’t be anything dangerous can it? (Harry opens it and gives out a yell as maggots pour out of the package. Ron bursts out to laughing and INT. KITCHEN-CHRISTMAS AFTERNOON The scene cuts to Fred, George, Mr and Mrs. Weasly, Lupin, Ginny, and Bill sitting around the dinner table. There’s a lot of rustle and talking around the table. HARRY This is excellent Mrs. Weasley MRS. WEASLEY Thanks Harry dear. Bill could you please stop eating like an animal! BILL What! GINNY You have a maggot in your hair Harry (She reaches over and plucks it out of his hair.) HARRY (Chuckles nervously) Thanks Ginny smiles and goes back to her plate FRED So Ron…. GEORGE About this Lavender Brown… RON Shut up! GINNY Oohhh..looks like Ron can’t take what he dishes! RON YOU SHUT YOUR FACE! FRED Oh so angry… GEORGE That’s what love does to you… As everyone laughs Ginny looks over and notices to figures walking toward the house. She gets up and looks out of the window. GINNY Hey, it’s…its Percy! Everyone gets silent and turns around in a shock and we see a shot of Percy and Rufus Scrimgeour walking towards the house. HARRY Who’s that he’s with? RON Rufus Scrimgeour, the new Minister of Magic. The door opens and Percy walks in with a dry look on his face. It seems as if he doesn’t want to be there. PERCY (In a mono tone voice) Merry Christmas, Mother. MRS. WEASLEY Oh, Percy!! (She jumps up and hugs him. He still has the same look on his face and all the Weasley kids look at each other with disgust.) SCRIMGEOUR You must forgive this intrusion. MR. WEASLEY Please, come in and sit down, Minister! Have little purkey, or some…. SCRIMGEOUR I don’t want to intrude Arthur. Wouldn’t be here at all if Percy hadn’t wanted to see you all so badly… MRS. WEASLEY Oh, PERCY!!! (She starts hugging and kissing him more. Ron, The Twins, and Ginny look at each other and roll their eyes.) SCRIMGEOUR We only have a few minutes, so I’ll have a stroll around the yard while you catch up with Percy. Well, if anybody cares to show me your charming garden… (The camera cuts to Harry and back to Scrimgeour.) Ah, that young man is finished, why doesn’t he take a stroll with me? EXT-GARDEN-CHRISTMAS AFTERNOON (MOMENT LATER) SCRIMGEOUR I’ve wanted to meet you for a very long time, did you know that? HARRY No. SCRIMGEOUR Oh yes, I have been hoping for an occasion to talk to you ever since I gained office, but Dumbledore has prevented this. (He looks at Harry but Harry says nothing.) The rumors have been flying around of you being ‘the Chosen One.’ I assume Dumbledore has discussed these matters with you? HARRY Yeah we’ve discussed it. SCRIMGEOUR And what has Dumbledore told you Harry? HARRY Sorry but that’s between us. SCRIMGEOUR Oh, of course, if it’s a question of confidences, I wouldn’t want to divulge and in any case, does it really matter if you are the Chosen One or not? HARRY I don’t get what you’re saying. SCRIMGEOUR You are a symbol of hope for many, Harry. The idea that there is somebody out there who might be destined to destroy him, it gives people a lift. Once you realize this, you might consider it, almost a duty, to stand slongside the Ministry, and give everyone a boost. HARRY Stand alongside the Ministry? SCRIMGEOUR If you were to be seen popping in and out of the Ministry from time to time, that would give the right impression you see. HARRY So basically you’d like to give the impression that I’m working for the Ministry? SCRIMGEOUR Yes Harry that’s about right, whatever’s possible to give people hope… HARRY Won’t that seem as though I approve of what the Ministry is up to? SCRIMGEOUR Well…yes that… HARRY No thank you sir. You see I don’t like some of the things the Ministry is doing. Locking up Stan Shunpike, for instance. SCRIMGEOUR These are dangerous times Harry and certain measures have to be taken. HARRY I don’t want to be used! SCRIMGEOUR So I guess you are not the chosen one. HARRY I thought you said it didn’t matter either way? SCRIMGEOUR I shouldn’t have said that, it was tactless… HARRY No, it was one of the only honest things you’ve said to me. You don’t care whether I live or die, but you do care that I help you convince everyone you’re winning the war against Voldemort. The Ministry wasn’t so keen to be pals last year. SCRIMGEOUR (A long beat) So what is old Dumbledore up to? Where does he go when he is absent from Hogwarts. HARRY No idea SCRIMGEOUR You wouldn’t tell me if you knew would you? HARRY No, I wouldn’t SCRIMGEOUR Well, it is clear to me that he has done a very good job on you. Dumbledores man through and through, aren’t you, Potter? HARRY You got it. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Choices? One Vow or the other????
IenjoyAcidPops, :welcome: to the thread! That short scene covers alot of areas, and that's hard to do and I commend you. Phrozenone, You're doing well. (Probably better than I am) PS It's 8:45pm here, so I'm not sure about you posting a new one right now (since I'm about to log off) I'll pick at it tommorow |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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You know I didn't even notice you posted...we probably were writing at the same time. That was good though, having Snape show the Dark Mark made me smile. However instead of Lucius just say his father...I dunno I thought it'll be a good idea for the audience not to know who her son was until Diagon Alley and then there's a big 'OOHHHHHHH' from the audience. Welcome to the thread though!!! Post more...NOW!!!! :p |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Thanks for the comments, guys, much appreciated. I've just gone back and corrected a few little things (like I slipped and had Narcissa saying Snape was Draco's favorite student :lol:). I'm making some touch-ups on the next scene, as I've really just started this one. As I really have no life, I'm working on DH as well, so I've spent more time on that one.
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And here's a question: can you imagine the dialogue I do have now coming from Alan Rickman, Helena Bonham Carter, and Helen McCrory? Because I do really want to write an HP movie I'd be happy with, and part of that is writing to the actors' rythms and speech patterns as we've seen them, even if this isn't the real script, obviously. Do you know what I mean, or am I just overcomplicating this to point of insanity? :lol: |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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Calm down. Take a deep breathe...there you go...theereeee you goooo. I understand everything you're saying lol. The thing about it is I wrote my HBP script long before the film came out so I will of course rewrite to make it fit in what happened in the 5th movie. Also I'm always doing the characters voices and making the faces I'd think they'd make when I'm writing it :lol: I know I'm weird but I really understand your 'writing to the actors rythms' |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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I'm going to be so attached to this script. It'll be hard to cut when it's finished. Quote:
OK, back to being a critic.... Quote:
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This may come across a little harsh, so... Edit: It isn't that gentle after all... Spoiler: show Quote:
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Edit: I forgot about the Vow cut. I have this to say: It is effective yet I'd prefer the scene to end at Narcissa's proposal, so the audience questions until the middle of the movie (When Harry finds out). |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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"Then you ought to hold your tongue!" snarled Bellatrix. "Particularly in present company!" "Present company?" repeated Snape sardonically. "And what am I to understand by that, Bellatrix?" "That I don't trust you, Snape, as you very well know!" So, I just thought that line was a good way for Bellatrix to enter the scene and quickly tell us that she doesn't trust Snape. Of course, I could just use the lines I just quoted. Hmmmm... Quote:
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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Okay, I've gone back and made some very minor edits to that scene. Just a few line changes; just skim and you'll notice what they are. I didn't dislike what I had in those spots, but I think what's here now might just flow a little better. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Yeah I meant the fox.
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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Personally, I would wait to introduce the title until after the Vow is made (this is just me - I love prologues). This is how I picture the Spinner's End scene (dramatically cut, of course): The film will open with the classic zoom through the sky, but the camera catches sight of a tattered cloak and the sucking of air (the perspective of a dementor). We fly down to a little hamlet, rushing past a sign that reads "Spinner's End" and next to a neglected home. The camera looks in through a dusty window and you see two silhouettes and hear a low hum of voices. Soon, the camera penetrates the glass and enters the room, and as one gentle, nervous voice speaks, the camera focuses on a black hood with locks of golden hair visible. "Will you, Severus Snape, watch over my son as he attempts to fulfill the Dark Lord's wishes?" "I will." (The camera flashes to a strip of rope-like flame twines itself around two locked hands - remains focused on hands) "And will you, to the best of your ability, protect him from harm?" "I will." (A second strip joins the first) "And, should it prove necessary, will you carry out the deed that the Dark Lord has ordered to be performed?" (Pause - hesitation - camera flicks to a man's face - Snape's face) OR (Camera shows the man's hand jerk, as if almost pulling away) "I will." (Camera concentrates on Snape's face, coming closer and closer, until he looks down, and so does the camera. The camera is enveloped in flame and out erupts the title: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.) This is one way to do it. If this scene is kept, this is all it should be. The Bellatrix-Snape mania is simply a waste of time. Furthermore, no introduction should be included on who the woman is, since the audience should have no clue she is talking about Draco - they will be enlightened at Slughorn's feast. Therefore, why even show Narcissa coming to Snape's door? Why not simply show the Unbreakable Vow (the sole important part of this scene - at least, for moviegoers)? It is a swift, mysterious scene before the title (not a lengthy one like in SS/PS), and it conveys more in 30 seconds to 1 minute than a 5 minute scene would. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
MrSleepyHead, I have nothing much to say, which preety much means :clap:
Anyway, I just wanted to say that I just did a rough write of the train scene. 10 PAGES! I couldn't beleive it. I can definately see some areas to change now, though so that will cut back. I have some work to do. |
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Ok guys as a special holiday treat instead of the next chapter of HBP I will present to you guys..the never seen by public eyes...my screenplay for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I started on this a while back and I've yet to finish it actually (Writers block..cutting some characters proved harder than I thought) So here it is and I know I know it's horrible. I was just playing around with ideas (And as a side note this was pre Dumbledore's big announcement so don't read into the opening scene to much :p)
I just wanted to see you guys opinion on it really so here it is and Happy Holidays! EXT. DARK VILLAGE-NIGHT The WB logo slowly floats towards the screen out of a sea of dark clouds. As we fly through the logo flashes of light are seen in the distance. The camera slowly moves forward as we see two wizards throwing spells at each other in the distance. We then see ALBUS DUMBLEDORE standing with is wand at the ready with rubble all around him with fire in his eyes. Across the screen we see Fifty (?) years earlier. DUMBLEDORE You don’t have to do this Grindewald, please old friend listen to reason! A powerful spell is thrown at Dumbledore and he produces a shield that deflects it and there’s a loud BOOM as the spell hits a nearby building sending debris flying everywhere. GRINDEWALD stands on the opposite side of Dumbledore with a huge smile on his face. GRINDEWALD Why do you oppose me Albus? You know of the power that I hold, we were once on the same page… DUMBLEDORE Things change Grindewald and so do people. GRINDEWALD That’s unfortunate…. Grindewald throws a bright red spell at Dumbledore, which Dumbledore barely avoids while throwing a series of blue spells at Grindewald. Grindewald deflects the spells back at Dumbledore and one hits him sending him off his feet flying backwards. Dumbledore stumbles up on his feet and looks up with defeat in his eyes as Grindewald slowly walks towards him with a smile. GRINDEWALD Your effort was admirable Albus, but you knew that it was foolish to oppose me. I am all-powerful… DUMBLEDORE Perhaps…EXPELLIARMUS! The spell knocks Grindewalds wand out of his hand and sends it flying in the air. The camera shows the wand flying into the air towards Dumbledore. DUMBLEDORE But you in all your ignorance forgot that the simplest of spell could do the trick… (He smiles as he reaches up into the air and grabs Grindewalds wand) And now I have your precious wand…old friend. Gridewald drops to his knees in defeat as the camera zooms pass him into the night sky into those eerie clouds as ‘Present Day’ scrolls across the screen the camera approaches a high gate which opens as it passes through going towards the MALFOY MANOR. INT. MALFOY MANOR-NIGHT Inside the home the camera follows NAGINI the snake as she slithers beside a table. We hear voices talking as she continues to move towards the table. VOLDEMORT (Offscreen) What news do you bring Severus? SNAPE (Offscreen) The Order of the Phoenix intends to move Harry Potter from his current place of safety on Saturday at nightfall. We see a hand reach out for Nagini as she slowly moves up the arm and we see our first look at LORD VOLDEMORT as she wraps herself around his neck. Sitting beside him is SEVERUS SNAPE VOLDEMORT Saturday… There is a shuffle and Voldemort looks over at BELLATRIX LASTRANGE who is sitting beside NARCISSA, LUCIUS, and DRACO MALFOY. BELLATRIX My lord, do you think it safe to trust Severus. VOLDEMORT Ah yes my dear Bellatrix, he has earned my trust yet again. Lucius… LUCIUS Yes, my lord. VOLDEMORT Give me your wand. Lucius glances sideways at as she Narcissa puts her arm around Draco and pulls him closer to her as Voldemort says this. LUCIUS My…my wand my lord? VOLDEMORT Yes Lucius…. Lucius slowly hands his wand over to Voldemort as he takes it and examines it. VOLDEMORT Yes…yes…this shall do well. There is crying heard off screen and the camera pans back to show the whole entire table full of Death Eaters and a body slowly revolving over the table up side down. VOLDEMORT I think Nagini is hungry now… The camera is now in the POV of the person hanging above the table. Voldemort points the wand directly at the screen. VOLDEMORT AVADA KADAVRA! The spell flies at the screen and the screen flashes GREEN as the title ‘HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS’ appears. The title hovers for a second and there’s a flash as we’re taken too… INT. THE DURSLEYS-HARRY’S ROOM-NIGHT HARRY POTTER is standing looking out of his window. He sighs and turns around and we see that the room is empty and all of his belongings are packed. HEDWIG hoots in her cage and Harry walks over to it. HARRY It’s too dangerous to let you out right now Hedwig. But we should be out of here soon and you’ll be able to fly as much as you want. He smiles and strokes Hedwig on the beak and turns around and sits on his bed. He picks up the DAILY PROPHET that’s beside him and opens it up and we see a picture of Dumbledore smiling up at him and beside him it says ‘Albus Dumbledore Remembered’ Harry reads through it and his eye catches the name in AKNOWLODEMENTS: BATHILDA BAGSIDE. GODRICS HOLLOW. HARRY Look Hedwig. This person’s from Godrics Hollow…. the same place my parents were killed. Wonder how she knows Dumbledore…. Harry sighs and closes the newspaper. INT. THE DURSLEYS-LIVING ROOM-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to VERNON, PETUNIA, AND DUDLEY DURSLEY standing in the living room with all their bags packed. Harry is standing in front of them with all of his belongings behind him as we join in the middle of the conversation. HARRY This is for your own good and you know it. It’s not safe here and if you don’t leave right now Voldemort will probably kill you all to get to me. VERNON Now you listen here boy, if this is some crazy plot to get this house… HARRY I’ve already got a house, my godfather left me one, and do you seriously think I’d want this place. What for do I presume, the happy memories? PETUNIA Don’t you dare…. HARRY There’s no time for this. If you want to stay then feel free! You know where to meet members of the Order and they will escort you to somewhere safe, but if you’d rather stay here…. DUDLEY We want to go. VERNON Dudley? HARRY There you go! Now it’s best if you leave…now. They’re waiting for you. VERNON Well then…I guess this is good-bye then, boy. PETUNIA Are you ready Diddy? DUDLEY Before we go… (He walks up to Harry) I never got to say….well…thank you. You saved my life. (He reaches out his hand and he and Harry shake hands.) HARRY Blimey Dudley, did the dementors blow a different personality into you? DUDLEY Dunno, See you Harry! They all look at Harry one last time and precede to walk out of the house with their things. Petunia turns back one last time and closes the door behind her. He stares at the door for a second and walks over to where Hedwig cage is sitting in the living room and sits down on the couch. HARRY So I guess this is the last time we’re going to see this place Hedwig. So many memories…rarely any of them are pleasant. (He looks at the Cupboard door under the stairs) I used to sleep under there Hedwig, you never knew me then. It looks so small now…. There is a sound made in the kitchen that makes Harry jumps up. He pulls out his wand and walks slowly into the kitchen. INT. DURSLEYS-KITCHEN-MOMENTS LATER Harry walks into the kitchen and see’s HAGRID smiling down at him. HAGRID All righ’ Harry? Ready fer the off? Following behind him is HERMION, RON, FRED, GEORGE, MAD EYE, MR. WEASLEY, TONKS, LUPIN, KINGSLEY, MUNDUNGES FLETCHER, BILL, AND FLUER all smiling at him except Mundunges who looks frightened. HARRY Wow, I wasn’t expecting this many of you. MAD EYE Change of plan… HARRY Well it’s great to see you all…well..except… (He looks at Mundungus) Who are you? MUNDUNGUS Oh um… MAD EYE Mundungus Fletcher…a ruddy coward like I’ve ever known, but he’s the one who came up with this great idea… HARRY What idea? MAD EYE Well your mothers charm will only break under two conditions: when you come of age or you no longer call this place home. So this time, when you leave, there’ll be no going back and the charm will break the moment you get outside it’s range… KINGSLEY The one thing we’ve got on our side is that You-Know-Who doesn’t know we’re moving you tonight. TONKS You’ll be going to my parents Harry, once you’re within the boundaries of the protective enchantments we’ve put on the house, you’ll be able to Portkey to the Burrow. HARRY Won’t it be kinda obvious where we’re going? I mean there are fourteen of us flying towards your parents…. MAD EYE Ah yes and here is the key to the plan. There will be seven Harry Potters moving through the skies tonight, each of them with a companion, each pair heading for a different safe house. HARRY But.. (Moody plucks a piece of Harry’s hair out of his head) Ow! MAD EYE Granger! You’ve got the Polyjuice potion. HERMIONE Here it is sir… MAD EYE Good. Now all seven Harry Potter line up over there. Ron, Hermione, Fred, George, and Fluer all walk to to the other side of the kitchen and line up. Mad Eye pushed Mundungus forward and he reluctantly joins them. HARRY This is mad…. FRED Well, none of us really fancy it Harry. GEORGE Imagine if something went wrong and we were stuck as specky, scrawny gits forever! HARRY Funny…. Mad Eye hands each of them a small container filled with polyjuice poition. MAD EYE All together then. They all take a big gulp of the drink. All of a sudden all of their features start to change into Harry. Harry stares in disbelief as now there are 7 other Harry Potter’s standing in front of him. FRED AND GEORGE (They look at each other) Wow…we’re identical! HERMIONE Harry your eyesight really is awful! MAD EYE Great…now Harry you will go with Hagrid on Sirius’s old bike. The Death Eaters will expect you to be on a broom. EXT. DURSLEY’S BACKYARD-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to everyone on their respected item of transportation. Harry looks around nervously. HARRY Hagrid, are you sure this is safe. HAGRID Don’ worry ‘arry, there are a few tricks on this bike if anythin ‘appens. MAD EYE Good luck, everyone! See you all in about an hour at the Burrow. On the count of three. One…two…THREE!!! Harry grasps on to Hedwigs cage in his lap as the bike starts and everyone takes off into the night sky. They rose into the sky and then suddenly out of knowhere they were surrounded by atleast thirthy hooded figures circles around them. Flashed of green light starts to fly throughout the air as the Death Eaters start throwing spells at the Order. Hagrid turns the bike sharply to avoid a spell and the others split off into separate directions. As the bike turns to the side Harry’s broomstick and Hedwig’s cage both fly out. Harry manages to grab Hedwigs’ cage then BOOM a spell hit’s Hedwig and she lands on the bottom of her cage dead. HARRY No…NO! The motorbike zooms ahead forward and Harry holds the cage close to his chest. HARRY Hedwig…Hedwig!! The scene then shifts to Moody and Mundungus flying quickly avoiding spells. Then all of a sudden Voldemort appears and he’s FLYING towards them quickly. MUNDUNGUS Oh my..he can fly..HE CAN FLY MOODY!!! MAD EYE Nose down Fletcher, he has to believe you’re Harry… MUNDUNGUS No…no I didn’t sign on for this… VOLDEMORT Avada…. MUNDUNGUS (Whispers) No… VOLDEMORT Kadavra! As the green light shoots out of his wand Mundungus Apparates off of the broom stick and BOOM Mad Eye is hit with the spell and falls off of his broom. Voldemort sneers and apparatus in the middle of the air. The scene shifts back to Harry and Hagrid still dodging spells in the air. Harry is throwing stunning spells back as Hagrid turns. HARRY There’s to many of them…. HAGRID This’ll do it Harry, hold on tight! Hagrid pushes a purple button and SWOOSH a loud roar occurs and white-hot and blue flams come bursting out of the exhaust sending the bike speeding away. A death eater sways to avoid the fire. Harry looks down to notice that the sudden speed has caused the sidecar to sway and it was coming apart from the bike and then CRACK it broke away. Harry quickly pulls out his wand…. HARRY Wingardium Leviosa! The sidecar stopped momentarily and Harry looks up to notice the 3 Death Eaters closing in fast. HARRY Impedimenta! The spell hits the Death Eater in the middle and as the sidecar starts to fall again. A spell comes flying at Harry who ducks to avoid it and hits his mouth on the side of the side car and then Hagrids hand grabs the back of his shirt and pulls him up onto the bike. Harry is now sitting back to back with Hagrid who continues to fly and dodge spells. Harry looks down at the falling sidecar. HARRY Confringo! The spell hits the sidecar and it explodes which knocked the Death Eater closest to it off of his broom. The remaining Death Eaters continue to fly towards Harry and the hood of one flies off of his head revealing that he’s STAN SHUNPIKE. HARRY Stan Shunpike…no… (Stan points his wand at Harry) Expelliarmus! STAN (He smiles) That’s him, it’s him, it’s the real one. Both Death Eaters look at each other and vanish out of sight. HAGRID Harry, what’s happened? Where’ve they gone? HARRY I…I don’t know! HAGRID Hold on tight Harry, we’re nearly there…. Hagrid pushes the button again and SWOOSH it takes off again. The bike starts to dip a little and Harry grabs his scar and starts to scream out in pain. SWOOSH Voldemort appears suddenly flying quickly towards them. Hagrid turns sharply as Harry starts to send out stunning spells, knocking one of the Death Eaters off of their broom and then BANG a spell hits the motorbike and sends it spiraling through the air out of control. Spells are still flying around them as a death eater appears beside them. HAGRID NO! Hagrid jumps off the bike and jumps on the Death Eaters broom on top of him and they both plummet towards the earth. VOLDEMORT Avada… Harry lays his head down in defeat. His hand moves up and BAM a burst of golden fire shoots from his wand shocking Voldemort as it hits the wand cracking it as Voldemort is thrown back. VOLDEMORT NO!!! Harry looks around and pushes the button and SWOOSH off again the bike goes. Harry turns around and sees Voldemort grab the wand of the nearest Death Eater. He points the wand at Harry and his eyes widen and SWOOSH he vanishes. Harry turns suddenly to try and control the out of control motorbike. He notices down on the ground Hagrid spread eagle on the ground. HARRY HAGRID! Harry pulls hard at the handlebars and CRASH he slams into a muddy pond. He is thrown out and lands on his back and screen cuts to black. INT. TONKS RESIDENCE-LIVING ROOM-MOMENTS LATER TED TONKS (Through the darkness) Harry…Harry Potter… The screen fades back in from Harry’s point of view looking up at TED TONKS staring down on him. Harry jumps up suddenly and looks around. Ted hands him his glasses. TED You’re safe now, we now know the protective charms we put up are working. Voldemort and the Death Eaters couldn’t get through. HARRY Hagrid… TED He’s fine…don’t worry. The wife is doing final patches on him. That’s a pretty nasty fall you made. HARRY Are you Tonks father? TED Ted Tonks at your service Mr. Potter. The portkey to the burrow is waiting, you best be off soon. Do me a favor though, let us know if Nymphadora’s alright and if all is well tell her we’ll be there for the wedding next week. HARRY Wedding? TED Haven’t you heard? Dora and Remus are getting married. But enough of that later, lets get you to that Portkey. EXT-THE BURROW-FRONT YARD-NIGHT-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to a shot of THE BURROW up the hill. There’s a FLASH and Harry and Hagrid fall onto the ground. We see lights come on in the distance and figures running towards them. As Harry gets up and dusts himself off we see MRS. WEASLEY run up to him and wrap her arms around him. MRS. WEASLEY Oh Harry, my dear boy we were so worried. You were the only one’s who haven’t arrived yet, I didn’t know…. HARRY I’m fine Mrs. Weasley…is everyone else okay? MRS. WEASLEY (She stares sadly at Harry) I’m afraid not, come in dear. We’ll fill you in on everything. INT-THE BURROW-LIVING ROOM-MOMENTS LATER Harry follows Mrs. Weasley into the living room. Everyone turns around. Harry notices GINNY and then notices George lying on the couch with a bandage around his head. HARRY What happened to him? GINNY Snape used the Sectumsempra spell on him, took his ear clean off. Lupin jumps up and rushes to Harry, placing his hands firmly on his shoulders and looking into his eyes. LUPIN What creature sat in the corner the first time that Harry Potter visited my office at Hogwarts! HARRY A…a grindylow in a tank, wasn’t it? LUPIN It’s him (he backs away from Harry and goes to sit beside Tonks) We’ve been betrayed Harry. Voldemort knew that you were being moved tonight...someone… HARRY None of the Order would have told Voldemort we were moving tonight. He only caught up with me towards the end… TONKS He caught up with you? RON Blimey Harry how did you escape? LUPIN Not only that, but how did they figure out it was you. HARRY I…well…I don’t’ know really. I saw Stan Shunpike, remember he drove the Knight Bus. And I tried to disarm him instead of….well…he doesn’t know what he’s dong does he? He must’ve been Imperiused. LUPIN Harry, the time for Disarming is past! These people are trying to kill you! Atleast Stun if you aren’t prepared to kill! HARRY We were hundreds of feet up! Stan’s not himself and if I stunned him and he’d fallen, he’d have died the same as if I’d used Avada Kadavra! LUPIN You’re missing the point Harry… HARRY Am I? Correct me if I’m wrong but Expelliarmus saved me from Voldemort two years ago! I won’t blast people out of my way just because they’re there, that’s Voldemorts job! They all stare at Harry who looks around the room and notices someone missing. HARRY Where’s Moody? Everyone’s head drops at the mention of his name. KINGSLEY He didn’t make it Harry. Harry turns around from all of them in the state of shock. Tears swelling up in his eyes. HARRY I can’t stay here. You’re all in danger while I’m here. I don’t want… MRS. WEASLEY Don’t be silly! The whole point tonight was to get you here safely. HAGRID Yer not goin’ anywhere… MR. WEASLEY Look at what we went through to get you here. GEORGE Yeah, what about my bleeding ear? They all turn and look at George who’s just awakened. FRED Are you all right? GEORGE Yeah, I feel saint like actually. You see brother…I’m holy. Holey (He points at his missing ear) Get it? FRED With the whole wide world of ear related humor before you, you go for holey? HAGRID See ‘arry you can’t go GEORGE Ear, Ear! FRED That’s better! HARRY Fine I’ll…stay. Is it alright if I go to bed? MRS. WEASLEY Of course dear. Do you want me to fetch Hedwig for you, I’ll put her up with the other owls. Harry eyes fell. He hadn’t thought about it and it seems everyone else in the room notices. Ginny and Hermione both start crying and Mrs. Weasley places her hand over her mouth in shock. HARRY Can I please…just go to sleep… He turns and leaves everyone. INT. THE BURROW-RON’S ROOM-NIGHT The scene cuts to Harry stirring in his sleep. Suddenly FLASH INT. MALFOY MANOR-DUNGEON-NIGHT There is a man shown on the floor crying out in pain. He looks up and we see that it is OLLIVANDER. VOLDEMORT (Offscreen) CRUCIO! Ollivander screams out in pain as Voldemort steps into view, clearly angry. VOLDEMORT You lied to Lord Voldemort Ollivander. You say that since Potter and I have the same core in our wands we won’t be able to fight one another, and that if I change wands I could destroy him. OLLIVANDER Please...no…I swear...I thought I thought VOLDEMORT Lies! You sought to help him, to help him escape…me…. OLLIVANDER The connection…. exists only between your two wands…. VOLDEMORT Really? (He throws Lucius’s broken wand down in front of Ollivander) Explain this then. OLLIVANDER No…I…I…. Voldemort points the wand at Ollivander again who starts to scream out in agony and FLASH INT. THE BURROW-RONS ROOM-MOMENTS LATER Harry jumps up as the scream is still being heard on scream. Harry is sweating and panting crazily. INT. THE BURROW-ROOMS ROOM-MORNING’ The scene cuts to a shot of the Burrow in the morning. We then hear Hermione’s voice as the scene cuts to Harry sitting on his bed and Ron and Hermione are sitting across from him. HERMIONE You scar wasn’t supposed to do that anymore Harry! You mustn’t let that connection open up again, Dumbledore wanted you to close your mind. Don’t let him get inside your head! RON And you say your wand acted on it’s on to destroy him? HERMIONE That’s impossible, I’m sure Harry just reacted instinctively. HARRY No Hermione, I’m telling you it wasn’t a spell I recognized. Its like my wand had a power of it’s own…. There’s a knock on the door and Harry turns around and standing there with a birthday cake is Mrs. Weasley and Ginny. MRS. WEASLEY, RON, GINNY and HERMIONE Surprise!! Ron pats him on the back and Hermione jumps up and hugs him before walking past Mrs. Weasley and Ginny out of the room. RON Didn’t think we’d forgotten your birthday did you mate? HARRY Yes, I’d forgotten myself. I’m seventeen! RON Which means you can do magic whenever you want now. Give it a go. HARRY Ok… (Notices a book near Ron’s bed) Accio Book! The book flies towards Harry and he catches it and reads the title. HARRY Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches…what… Ron quickly grabs the book and stuffs it under his pillow. MRS. WEASLEY Yes, well come on down stairs dear everyone’s waiting! She turns to leave and they all walk out of the room. Before heading downstairs Ginny grabs him by the arm. GINNY We need to talk. They both back away and Ron turns around as they both walk into Ginny’s room and closes the door. INT. THE BURROW-GINNY’S ROOM-MOMENTS LATER. The scene cuts to Ginny walking up to her window and looking out of it as Harry gazes around her room. GINNY (sighs) Happy Seventeenth Harry. She turns around and faces him. HARRY Thanks…ugh...nice view huh? GINNY I couldn’t think of what to get you. I know you, Ron, and Hermione are taking off soon on some mission and…I didn’t know what would be useful. HARRY Ginny…. GINNY Nothing too big, because you wouldn’t be able to take it with you. (She walks closer to him.) So then I thought, I’d like you to have something to remember me by, you know…just in case you meet someone else while you’re off doing whatever. HARRY I think dating opportunities are going to be pretty thin to be honest. GINNY There’s the silver lining I’ve been looking for Ginny reaches in and kisses Harry. They continue to kiss until the door opens and Ron walks in. They break apart and stare at him. RON Oh…I was um…sent to fetch Harry. Everyone’s waiting. Ginny walks out of the room and turns around. GINNY Happy birthday anyway, Harry. She gives a slight smile and walks down the hall. Harry tries to walk out but Ron blocks his way. RON You ditched her. What are you doing now, messing her around? HARRY I’m not messing her around Ron…. RON She was really cut up when you ended it… HARRY So was I. You know why I stopped it, and it wasn’t because I wanted to… RON Yeah? But you go snogging her now and she’s just going to get her hopes up again if you keep groping her every chance you get… HARRY It won’t happen again okay? RON Right then…well…everyone’s waiting… Ron turns to walk downstairs and Harry follows. INT. THE BURROW-KITCHEN-MOMENTS LATER Ron and Harry walks into the kitchen where Mrs. Weasley, Tonks, Lupin, Hagrid, Fred, George, Ginny, and Hermione are sitting. EVERYONE Happy Birthday Harry!!! There’s a POP and confetti flies everywhere. Harry smiles as Lupin and Tonks both walk up and hug him. MRS. WEASLEY Come sit here Harry dear, it’s your special day. HARRY Thanks…I…you didn’t have to… MRS. WEASLEY Of course we had too… LUPIN You’re a man now Harry. TONKS We’re so proud of you. They both look at each other and smile. HARRY Your dad tells me you two are getting married, congrats! They both smile and kiss each other. Hermione, Mrs. Weasley, and Ginny all ‘Awww’ at this. HAGRID Seventeen, eh! Six years ter the day since we met, Harry, d’yeh remember it? HARRY Yeah…. MRS. WEASLEY (She hands Harry a watch) It’s traditional to give a wizard a watch when he comes of age…it’s not much but Harry jumps up and gives her a hug. MRS. WEASLEY (Smiling) Well everyone grab a plate and dig in! Everyone starts to pass plates around the table and the camera zooms in on Harry with a smile on his face as he watches his friends. INT. THE BURROW-KITCHEN-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to everyone sitting at the table finishing up their dinners. HARRY This has been wonderful, thank you all. LUPIN We had to do this, seeing you’re taking a year off from school from what I hear. IT goes silent and everyone looks up at Lupin. Mrs. Weasley has a worried look on her face. MRS. WEASLEY What? HARRY It’s nothing Mrs. Weasley, really…let’s just finish the meal… LUPIN You can’t do this alone Harry… RON He won’t be alone. Hermione and I are going with him. MRS. WEASLEY Going with…what is this? HARRY Dumbledore left us an assignment to do and we can’t talk about it okay. Just…just trust me… MRS. WEASLEY You’re just kids! HARRY Actually we’re not anymore. Besides it’s on Dumbledore’s orders Mrs. Weasley. If he says we can then you have to trust him…. Mr. Weasley walks in with a bag on his arm. MR. WEASLEY Harry, Ron, Hermione…could I speak to you three alone for a second. MRS. WEASLEY Arthur…? MR. WEASLEY Don’t worry Molly, we’ll be back soon. The three of them get up from the table and follow Mr. Weasley out of the room. INT. THE BURROW-SITTING ROOM-MOMENTS LATER Mr. Weasley walks into the sitting room and gestures the three of them to sit down as he opens the bag. MR. WEASLEY I have something for the three of you. Scrimgeour was supposed to do this himself but I guess he wasn’t feeling up to it. HARRY You won’t see me crying over that. What is it? MR. WEASLEY Dumbledore. He left all three of you something in his will. RON All of us? MR. WEASLEY (He pulls out a piece of parchment and begins to read aloud) Where is it…ah here it is. To Ronald Bilius Weasley, I leave my Deluminator, in the hope that he will remember me when he uses it. Mr. Weasley pulls out the Deluminator and hands it to Ron. Ron grabs it and examines it and he pushes the button and SWOOSH it sucked out the light from the nearest light. RON Cool… He clicks it again and the light is restored. RON I wonder why he left me this…I was under the impression he never noticed me at all. HERMIONE Don’t be thick; Dumbledore was very fond of you. Who wouldn’t be? They both look at each other and smile and Mr. Weasley clears his throat. MR. WEASLEY To Miss Hermione Jean Granger, I leave my copy of ‘The Tales of Beedle the Bard’ in the hope that she will find it entertaining and instructive. He pulls out the book and hands it to Hermione who quickly flips it open and begins to read. MR. WEASLEY And finally, To Harry James Potter. I leave the Snitch he caught in his first Quidditch match at Hogwarts, as a reminder of the rewards of perseverance and skill. He pulls out the snitch and looks at it. MR. WEASLEY Now this I must say is most peculiar. HARRY Why’s that sir. MR. WEASLEY Flesh memory. RON What? HERMIONE (Still reading) Snitches carry enchantments by which it can identify the first human to lay hands upon it, in case of a disputed capture. (She looks up and all of them are staring at her.) What? Mr. Weasley hands the Snitch over to Harry and drops it in his hand. Harry picks it up and stares at it but nothing happens. MR. WEASLEY There’s one last thing left for you Harry. It’s the sword of Godric Gryffindor. All three of them stare up him in shock. MR. WEASLEY Unfortunately it wasn’t available; I’m not sure where it is exactly. Listen you three, I could help out on this mission… RON You need your job Dad. MR. WEASLEY Could you atleast tell me… HARRY No…I’m sorry Mr. Weasley but Dumbledore didn’t want us to tell anyone. MR. WEASLEY I understand (He smiles weakly) Well I’ll leave you three to your thoughts, I’ll grab me a piece of cake. He bows and walks out of the room. RON Why do you think he left us all this? HERMIONE He couldn’t put in his will why he left us this; for fear that the Ministry would confiscate it, which they did. That still doesn’t explain…’The Tales of Beedle the Bard’ If these things are important enough to pass on right under the nose of the Ministry, you’d think he’d have let us know why…unless he thought it was obvious. RON He left Harry an old Snitch…what the hell was that about? HARRY Well we’ve yet to find out don’t you think. (They both stare at him) Don’t you remember how I caught the Snitch in my first game? RON That’s the one you nearly swallowed! HARRY Exactly! (Harry pops the Snitch in his mouth and takes it out and writing appears on it and Harry reads it aloud as the camera zooms in on it.) I open at the close. I wonder what’s that suppose to mean… There’s a CRASH in the kitchen and all three of them look up and run quickly into the kitchen. INT. THE BURROW-KITCHEN-MOMENTS LATER Mrs. Weasley is holding her heart as a silver lynx patronus came running through the kitchen and lands on the table. KINGSLEY (Voice coming from the Patronus) The Ministry has fallen. Scrimgeour is dead. They are coming. Fear strikes the eyes of everyone in the room. They run to the window and see plenty of black apparitions appearing turning into Death Eaters approaching the Burrow. MR. WEASLEY Oh no… LUPIN Harry, Ron, Hermione…you must flee now. Get as far away as you can…don’t worry about us we’ll be fine. Spells are thrown at the house as windows shatter. Hermione frantically grabs the boy’s hands as they run out of the back of the house. She closes her eyes and SWOOSH they are gone. EXT. TOTTENHAM COURT ROAD-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to a busy street and SWOOSH Harry, Ron, and Hermione appear in an alleyway. RON Where are we? HERMIONE No time to explain Ron…. (She pulls out her small handbag and hands Harry his Invisibility cloak) HARRY Thanks…but… HERMIONE Undetectable Extension Charm. Tricky, but I think I’ve done okay. I managed to fit everything we need in here. I packed everything this morning…you know just in case…. RON You’re amazing, you know that? HERMIONE (Smiles) Thank you, now Harry put the cloak on! HARRY But everyone at the Burrow…. RON It’s not the time to worry about everyone else mate. It’s you they’re after and we’ll just put everyone in more danger by going back. Harry hesitates but throws the cloak over him and Ron and Hermione walk out of the alleyway and into the busy Muggle streets. RON So why’d you bring us here? HERMIONE What else is there? We can’t book rooms at The Leaky Cauldron and Grimmauld Place is out if Snape can get in there… RON But Dad told me that Moody put in spells just in case he showed up to stop him getting in, I’m sure it’s better than in this Muggle town. We have to go somewhere to find out what’s going on. HERMIONE We know what’s going on Ron! Voldemort’s taken over the Ministry, what else do we need to know? RON I dunno it’s just… SWOOSH out of nowhere two figures apparate in front of them in black smoke. They stop dead in their tracks as they dark figures dressed in black slowly approach them. They pull out their wands… HERMIONE Run! Hermione pulls Ron and the Invisible Harry into another alleyway in the nick of time as spells fly past them. The Death Eaters begin to chase them down the Alleyway throwing spells and rubble is blasted all around them. One Death Eater points his wand at Ron which sends out ropes flying at him. The wands wrap around Ron and he falls to the ground. HARRY (From under the cloak) STUPEFY! The spell shoots out but barely misses the death eater. DEATH EATER 1 Expulso! A strong spell flies out and BOOM the wall beside Harry explodes and the Invisibility Cloak flies off him as he avoids the tumbling wall. HERMIONE Petrificus Totalus! BAM the Death Eater is hit square in the chest and falls down frozen as Harry grabs his wand and points it at the other one who’s about to attack Hermione. HARRY STUPEFY! BAM the spell knocks the Death Eater hard into the wall and he falls out unconscious. Hermione runs over to Ron and points her wand at him. HERMIONE Diffindo! SWISH the ropes fly out and Harry helps Ron up and then goes to fetch his Invisibility Cloak. HERMIONE Are you alright? RON Fine… HERMIONE How did they find us! What are we going to do? RON What are we going to do with them? You don’t think we should kill them do you? HARRY We…we just need to wipe their memories. It’s better like that; it’ll throw them off the scent. If we killed them it’d be obvious we were here. HERMIONE (She points her wand at the Death Eater) Obliviate! The spell hits the Death Eater in the head his eyes become unfocused and dreamy. HARRY Brilliant Hermione! She points her wand at the other and does the same. HERMIONE How do you think they found us Harry? You don’t think you’ve still got your Trace on you… RON He can’t have, he’s seventeen now. What we need is a safe place to hide. HARRY Grimmauld Place. HERMIONE But Harry Snape…. HARRY If he shows up I’d like nothing better to do than repay him for what he did. Besides where else is there? Hermione and Ron look at each other and the scene cuts to… EXT. GRIMMAULD PLACE-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to a shot of Number 12 Grimmauld Place and SWOOSH Harry, Ron, and Hermione appear in front of it. They slowly approach the door and stand there for a moment. HARRY Well…here goes nothing. He takes a deep breath and opens the door. INT. NUMBER 12 GRIMMAULD PLACE-ENTRANCE The camera shifts to inside of the house as we see Harry walking through the door. All three walk into the house and Ron closes the door behind him. They walk slowly up the hall until a familiar voice calls out… MOODY Severus Snape? HARRY We’re not Snape! There’s a SWOOSH and Harry, Ron, and Hermione grab their mouths in pain for a second and another SWOOSH and it passes. Harry turns to look at them. RON Tongue Tying Curse that was, Moody must’ve set it. Harry turns around and continues to walk and a dusty figure starts to form in front of them. Hermione grabs Ron’s arm as a figure of Dumbledore appears pointing at them. HARRY No! It wasn’t us! We didn’t kill you…. SWOOSH the cloud of dust explodes leaving them coughing. RON Do you think there’s anyone here? Or any more enchantments. HERMIONE Only one way to find out. (She pulls out her wand) Homenum revelio! Nothing happens. HERMIONE That was a spell to reveal human presence, and there’s nobody here except us! RON And old dusty (gesturing to where Dumbledore’s figure just was) HARRY Let’s get upstairs… (He pauses and grabs his scar in pain) RON What is it? HARRY Nothing…I… RON Is it him? Did you see something. Is he at my place.? HARRY No I just felt angry, he’s really angry… HERMIONE Harry you’re supposed to be closing your mind… HARRY I know okay! He turns his back on them as he closes his eyes in pain. Lord Voldemorts voice is heard over the screen VOLDEMORT You call me back to tell me that Harry Potter has escaped again! Lord Voldemort is not sure he will forgive this time. There is a scream heard as Ron and Hermione both stare at him with fear in their eyes. The screaming suddenly stops as Harry opens his eyes. And a bright light shines in front of them.. Harry pulls out his wand as a weasel patronus appears out of the light as Mr. Weasley’s voice calls out. MR. WEASLEY Family safe, do not reply, we are being watched. SWOOSH the patronus is gone. Ron gives a sigh of relief. RON They’re okay. HERMIONE That’s great news. Harry…are you okay? HARRY Yes, I’m fine don’t worry about me. HERMIONE Harry don’t let him into your mind! Otherwise Voldemort can plant false images in your head, remember Sirius… HARRY It’s over now Hermione, can you just drop it. Please. HERMIONE Well I think we should freshen up anyways. Let’s go upstairs and clean up. And don’t worry Ron I washed your undergarments yesterday… RON (Embarrassed) Hermione…. Hermione and Ron proceed to walk upstairs slowly. Harry scratches his scar as he turns around to the spot the Dumbledore appeared, sighs, and follows. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
Wow, Phrozenone, that is a lot, but it's pretty good, most of it. I mean, some dialogue could use some tweaking, but it's certainly not horrible. You really pared down "The Dark Lord Ascending" and "The Dursleys Departing"; I'm in the process of doing the same for my script, but I am going for longer than yours (or at least the one you just posted). It's kinda weird, though, you and I had some of the exact same lines for those scenes. Interesting choice to have Arthur deliver the items in DD's will; I'd just keep Scrimgeour. but that's just me. Now onto a couple particular things of interest:
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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Honestly I wrote this maybe...3 weeks after DH was released so I had all these ideas going through my head. 'The Dark Lord Ascending' and 'The Dursleys Departing'...I guess I did kinda cut those down to their bare basics huh? lol (Just wait until you see the rest..it's MURDER!)Trust me there was ALOT more in it at first and I can't wait to see your version. I love seeing how many different ways people can interpret one story, it amazes me. I go off the wall and cut things and change things and add things to try to make it flow better and keep it a short running time...whereas others are more for detail and sticking close to canon and I LOVE it :lol: Hard core book fans would HATE me lol Quote:
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That line...remember what you said about about trying to right using the actors mannerisms and such? That's what I did there. I'm glad you liked most of it. (Did you notice my little nod to Ron's book on how to please young witches? I'd forgotten I'd put that in there and just LOL'd as I was reading through it :p) |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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I've gone back and changed my first post-WB logo shot for "Spinner's End", and I will likely do so several more times :lol:. The next thing I post will actually be another scene, but not from HBP or DH. Instead, I'm either going to try my hand at the Harry/Dumbledore conversation from GoF's end or OotP's end, because I thought those scenes were each way too short and thin. |
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter
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BTW remember this is first draft LOL..there is ALOT I want to change now. Especially all the Kreacher stuff and I'm still not sure how I'll bring Dobby in yet but I just wanted you guys to have a glimpse into my thinking process INT. NUMBER 12 GRIMMAULD PLACE-BEDROOM-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to Harry sitting on one bed and Hermione and Ron sitting on another facing him in conversation. HERMIONE So what do you suppose we do now? We can’t stay here long; we still have a mission to do. Harry I know you wanted to go see your parents grave at Godrics Hollow, but shouldn’t we make the Horcruxes our priority? With the pieces of Voldemort’s soul out there we can’t possibly defeat him. HARRY If we knew where the Horcruxes were, I’d agree with you. HERMIONE Voldemort’s probably keeping a watch on Godric’s Hollow, I’m sure he expects you to go back and visit you parents. RON This R.A.B. person, you know, the one who stole the real locket? He said in his note he was going to destroy it right? HARRY He said he’s stolen it and intended to destroy it as soon as he could. RON Well, what if he did finish it off? HERMIONE Or she. RON Yes, or she (She smiles at him and he blushes but continues talking.) It’d be one less for us to do! HERMIONE We still have to trace the locket to see if it’s destroyed. HARRY The question is how do you destroy a locket. I’ve been wondering how Dumbledore destroyed the ring. Why didn’t I ask him? I never really asked him anything…. HERMIONE Well after Dumbledore’s funeral I kinda….borrowed some of his books… RON What? HERMIONE Only because I was sure we’d need them! RON You’re amazing! HERMIONE (clears throat) Yes, well, from what I’ve read what Harry did to Riddle’s diary was one of the few really foolproof ways of destroying a Horcrux. RON Stabbing it with a basilisk fang? Lucky we’ve got such a large supply of those… HERMIONE It has to be something so destructive that the Horcrux can’t repair itself. Basilisk venom can only be destroyed by one thing…. HARRY Phoenix tears. RON Did you read anything on if you make a Horcrux, somehow putting the pieces of your soul back together? HERMIONE Yes actually, I can’t see Voldemort attempting it however. You have to feel remorse. You’ve got to really feel what you’ve done. The pain is said to be unbearable and can destroy you…. Harry gets up and walks across the room. HERMIONE Harry what’s wrong? HARRY Don’t you see Hermione? We’re unprepared. Who knows what lies ahead of us; I wish Dumbledore were still here. HERMIONE (Her eyes widens) He still is here Harry. (She jumps up.) Don’t’ you remember? After a headmaster dies a trace of himself is left… HARRY In a portrait, yeah. One problem though, it’s in Dumbledore’s office. There’s no way we can get there. HERMIONE Maybe not…but I think I know someone who could help us. INT. NUMBER 12 GRIMMAULD PLACE-SIRIUS ROOM-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to Hermione leading Harry and Ron into Sirius’s room. HARRY Hermione what are we doing in Sirius’s room? How is this supposed to help? HERMIONE That! She points at an empty portrait on the wall. RON Is there something we supposed to see? HERMIONE Don’t you see Ron. I just remembered. When Ron and I first got here 2 years ago Sirius took us on a tour. That portrait is of Phineas Nigellus Black. HARRY That’s great to know…. HERMIONE He’s Sirius’s great great grandfather and old headmaster of Hogwarts. Don’t you see? They both stare at her and wait for her to answer and she sigh’s in frustration. HERMIONE That’s the answer. As you know wizards can transport between their portraits. If we can somehow contact Phineas, maybe somehow we can contact Dumbledore through him. HARRY You think that’ll work? HERMIONE We might as well give it a try…. (She walks up to the portrait) Phineas. Mr. Black are you there! Mr. Black we need to talk to you please! Nothing happens and Hermione turns around with a look of disappointment. HARRY Maybe he’s busy with the new headmaster at Hogwarts whoever that is. HERMIONE Perhaps. We should keep a close watch on this just in case he appears. (She starts to take the portrait down) Who know’s how long we’ll be here. Might as well put it in my bag with everything else. HARRY I’m gonna go and see if I can find some food downstairs. INT. NUMBER 12 GRIMMAULD PLACE-HALLWAY Harry turns and walks out into the hallway. He slowly walks towards the stairs and looks at the sign on the door next to Sirius’s. He keeps walking but pauses and turns back around quickly and stares at the sign which reads ‘Do Not Enter Without the Express Permission of Regulus Arcturus Black’ HARRY Regulus Arcturus Black. R.A.B. (His eyes widen) HERMIONE, RON…COME HERE QUICK! They both run out of the room with their wands drawn quickly. RON What’s wrong mate. If it’s massive spiders again I want to eat before… HARRY Wrong? Nothing’s wrong. Look at this. They both read and Hermione gasps. HERMIONE R.A.B. is Sirius’s brother. Do you think…? HARRY He was a Death Eater…. RON Does that mean the locket is…. They all stare at each other for a moment until Harry walks forward and pulls out his wand. INT. NUMBER 12 GRIMMAULD PLACE-REGULUS ROOM-MOMENTS LATER There is a click and the door opens slowly by itself. Harry walks slowly into the room as the camera pans around showing everything around Regulus’s room. Harry walks up to a desk and picks up a photograph where there’s a picture of a young Sirius and Regulus looking up at Harry. The camera zooms in on Sirius smiling up and onto Harry who smiles slightly. He puts the picture around and turns to see Ron and Hermione tossing things aside. RON How do you expect to find a locket in this junk? HERMIONE Accio Horcrux! Nothing happens. HARRY Nice try Hermione, I don’t think it’s in here. HERMIONE Harry but it has to be. Where else could it be? HARRY I don’t know… RON Well someone has to know. HARRY You’re right Ron. Who else could’ve possibly been around during this time? Harry smiles strongly at them as the scene cuts to… INT. NUMBER 12 GRIMMAULD PLACE-KITCHEN-MOMENTS LATER The scene cuts to KREACHER carrying a large basket of scraps. Harry walks into the kitchen behind him. HARRY Kreacher! Kreacher screams and drops the scraps on the ground. He clutches his heart. KREACHER Master? Back in my Mistress’s old house with the blood traitor Weasley and the Mudblood…. HARRY I forbid you to call anyone ‘blood traitor’ or ‘Mudblood’. What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be at the school? KREACHER My apologies Master, Kreacher will leave immediately… HARRY Actually I’m glad you’re here. I was just going to summon you anyway. I’ve got a question for you and I order you to answer it truthfully. Understand? KREACHER Yes, master. Harry looks back and Ron and Hermione before asking. HARRY Did you know anything about a locket that Regulus Black stole from Lord Voldemort? Kreacher’s eyes widen at the question and tears start to pour from his eyes. KREACHER Kreacher failed! Kreacher did wrong! Kreacher turns and runs his head into the cabinet. HARRY I order you to stop! (He kneels down eye level to him) Please Kreacher, tell me what you know about the locket. Kreacher looks up at Harry and sigh. KREACHER At the age of sixteen Master Regulus joined the Dark Lord. So proud, so proud, so happy to serve…. There is a FLASH and we see Regulus Black standing in the exact spot Harry is looking at Kreacher. KREACHER (V.O.) Master Regulus came to Kreacher one day and said…that the Dark Lord required an elf and Master had volunteered Kreacher. There is another FLASH and now we see Voldemort with Kreacher in the same boat in the CAVE from the last film riding across towards the island in the middle. KREACHER (V.O.) The Dark Lord then took Kreacher to a cave and in the cave there was a great black lake which Kreacher took a boat across with the Dark Lord. There was a basin full of potion and…and… There is a FLASH and now we see Kreacher rolling across the ground in pain and Voldemort laughing at the sight. KREACHER (V.O.) He made Kreacher drink it, he made Kreacher drink all the potion. Kreacher saw terrible things, Kreacher’s insides burned. He dropped a locket into the empty basin…he filled it with more potion. And then the Dark Lord sailed away, leaving Kreacher on the island. Kreacher needed water, he drank from the black lake…and hands, dead hands, came out of the water and dragged Kreacher under the surface…. There’s a FLASH and we’re back at present time with Kreacher crying heavily as Harry is still kneeled in front of him. HARRY How did you get away? KREACHER Master Regulus told Kreacher to come back. HARRY I know, but how did you escape the Inferi? KREACHER Master Regulus told Kreacher to come back. HARRY I know, but…. RON It’s obvious isn’t it Harry, he Disappaated. HARRY But you can’t Apparate in and out of that cave, otherwise Dumbledore… RON Elf magic isn’t’ like wizards magic, is it? I mean they can Apparate and Disapparate in and out of Hogwarts when we can’t. He’s proof of that right now. KREACHER The house elf’s highest law is his Master’s bidding. HARRY So then what happened? There is a FLASH and once again we see Regulus kneeling down in front of Kreacher. KREACHER (V.O.) Master was very worried, worried indeed. One night Master came to Kreacher and asked Kreacher to take him to the cave where Kreacher had gone with the Dark Lord. FLASH now Kreacher and Regulus are standing on the island in front of the basin. KREACHER (V.O.) Master Regulus took from his pocket a locket like the one the Dark Lord had and he told Kreacher to take it and, when the basic was empty, to switch the locket and he ordered Kreacher to leave without him and to destroy the first locket. There is a shot of Kreacher crying as the Inferi slowly pulls Regulus under the water. Regulus looks up and smiles at Kreacher before he’s taken under. KREACHER (V.O.) Master Regulus was dragged beneath the water…and…. FLASH they’re back in common time and Hermione is in tears. Ron goes to comfort her and Harry sits down beside Kreature and stares ahead as the elf continues to cry. HARRY So you brought the locket here and tried to destroy it? KREACHER Nothing Kreacher did made any mark upon it. He failed…failed… HARRY Kreacher do you still have the locket? Kreacher looks up at Harry and nods. He pulls the locket out of his pocket and shows it to Harry. HARRY May I have it please? KREACHER If Master wishes than it is so He starts to cry even harder as he hands the locket to Harry. Harry looks at it for a second and then takes the fake locket out of his pocket. HARRY Kreacher, I’d like you to have this. This belonged to Regulus and I’m sure he’d want you to have it as a token of gratitude for what you… KREACHER (He looks up with Harry with tears forming in his eyes as he reaches out and grabs the locket) Thank you master…thank you… Kreacher smiles at Harry and Harry smiles back as Kreature holds the locket to his heart and walks away. Harry stares at the locket and we hear a soft beating like a heart. He tries to open it with it doesn’t bulge. He hands it to Ron who looks at aswell. HARRY I reckon we’re going to have to work out how to open this thing before we can destroy it. RON There’s definitely dark magic in this thing, it somehow makes me feel a little….angry…. He passes it to Hermione. HERMIONE What are we going to do with it? HARRY Keep it safe till we work out how to destroy it. She hands it back to Harry who stares at it for a moment as the camera zooms in on it as the scene fades. INT. GRIMMAULD PLACE-A FEW DAYS LATER-BEDROOM Harry is putting on his jacket when Hermione comes in. HERMIONE Breakfast is ready Harry. Who knew Kreacher was such an excellent cook! HARRY He’s sure come around hasn’t he. HERMIONE You know what today is don’t you Harry? It’s the first day of school…and we’re not there. Weird huh? HARRY Yeah…I wonder what they’re doing… Harry looks out the window and the camera passes by him quickly into a sea of clouds. The clouds part way and in the distance we see HOGWARTS. INT. HOGWARTS-THE GREAT HALL-NIGHT The scene cuts to a shot of Ginny sitting at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall and NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM sits down next to her. NEVILLE Hey Ginny. GINNY Neville hey, how was your summer. NEVILLE Don’t ask. (He leans in to whisper) Where’s Harry, Ron, and Hermione? GINNY I’m not sure… The hall goes quiet as the camera slowly pans up and shows standing in front of the podium Snape looking out over the hall. SNAPE I’d like to introduce the new headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Severus Snape. There are gasps heard throughout the hall and there’s a shot of the Slytherians looks proud. The camera pans down the teacher table all of them looking nervous and MCGONAGALL looks furious. SNAPE I’d like to introduce a few new teachers to you all. Alecto Carrow will take over for Muggle Studies and Amycus Carrow will be filling the position of Defense Against the Dark Arts. Neville leans in to Ginny as he says this. NEVILLE Aren’t both of them Death Eaters. GINNY Looks like You Know Who has his hand in Hogwarts as well. SNAPE I welcome the opportunity to uphold our finest Wizarding traditions and values. Rule breaking however, will result in harsh punishments. A new day and age is here and those who object will be dealt with. He gives a half smile as the scene cuts to the students filing out of the Great Hall to their respected Dorms. Ginny however walks out of the front doors and looks up at the sky. Neville walks up behind her. NEVILLE Ginny are you alright? GINNY Yeah…I’m just wondering if they’re okay. I hope Ron and Hermione are all right. NEVILLE They’re strong Ginny, I’m sure wherever they are they’re fine. He pats her on her back and turns around to walk in. Ginny continues to look up. GINNY (Whispers) Harry… INT. GRIMMAULD PLACE-ROOM-MORNING The scene fades to a faded Ginny in the exact window that Harry is looking out of. He sighs and we notice that there are 5 Death Eaters standing out side of the house looking rather confused. Hermione walks up behind him. HERMIONE Apparently Snape hasn’t given them our whereabouts. They can’t see Number 12 because the secret keeper hasn’t told them. There’s nothing to worry about… HARRY I know..I just…I was thinking about Ginny. I hope she’s all right. HERMIONE She’s fine Harry… Harry looks behind Hermione and sees Kreachur happily humming a tune as he goes down the hall. HARRY He sure is happy… Harry turns around and looks out the window but all the Death Eaters are gone. HARRY That’s strange…where did they all go. THUD. Harry and Hermione both turn around quickly as they hear noise coming from downstairs. HERMIONE What was that? HARRY Maybe Kreachure tripped again… HERMIONE (Pulls out her wand) Homenum revelio! There is a loud SWOOSH. HERMIONE (whispers) Harry…someone else is here… Harry pulls out his wand and they both walk slowly towards the stairwell as they hear faintly the defenses in the house going off. They look down the staircase and looking up at them holding a large BAG is Snape. SNAPE Potter! HARRY Hermione get Ron! Harry blasts a spell at Snape which he deflects with ease. Hermione runs upstairs to fetch Ron as Harry continues to throw spells at Snape. SNAPE No Potter! HARRY MURDERER! A green flash flies out of Harry’s wand but Snape avoids it and BAM a hole is knocked in the wall. Harry tries to cast another spell but it flies all across the room exploding the jars of heads in the hallway. He panicks and runs upstairs behind Hermione who comes running out of the bedroom with her bag and Ron at her hand. RON What’s going on? Snape runs upstairs and Ron gasps as Hermione grabs Harry’s arm closes her eyes and SWOOSH they disappear. Snape runs to where they are and stops. He turns around as the scene fades to… EXT. DARK WOODS-MOMENTS LATER The scene fades to a shot of the WOODS with the sun setting in the distance. SWOOSH Harry, Ron, and Hermione appear falling on the ground. Harry is the first to stand up and dust himself off. He then angrily punches the tree in front of him. HERMIONE Harry…. HARRY I could’ve killed him! I can’t believe I missed. My wand wasn’t working properly. HERMIONE What do you mean? HARRY I mean what I said Hermione! The spells I intended to throw….it didn’t work….and I don’t know…. Hermione grabs the hand Harry just punched the tree with and it’s bloody. HERMIONE I think I have something for this in my bag. She walks over and starts rummaging through the bag. RON Guess those protections didn’t work to well. Now what are we going to do? HERMIONE (Walking over to Harry and pouring a liquid on his hand) We can set up camp here for now. I’ll put some protective enchantments up around this place so we’re not detected. Ron could you grab the tent in the bag? RON You packed a tent? Do you think of everything? She smiles and runs off as the scene cuts to a shot of the TENT standing in the middle of the woods. Ron and Harry putting the finishing touches on it when Hermione walks back up to them. HERMIONE That’s as much as I can do. At the very least, we should know they’re coming. I can’t guarantee it will keep out Vol… RON Don’t say his name! HERMIONE Honestly Ronald, Fear of a name…. RON I know, it’s just….I feel like it’s a jinx or something. Can’t we call him You-Know-Who…please? HERMIONE Well regardless we should take turns keeping watch outside of the tent. We’ll also need to think about some food as well. I found some mushrooms while I was out putting up the protections. RON (Grumpily) Great… He turns and walks into the tent as Hermione walks over to Harry, who is now sitting on the ground outside the tent, and sits down beside him. HERMIONE Harry what’s wrong? HARRY I think I’m losing it Hermione. It’s like when I saw Snape I couldn’t think straight…I…I…. Hermione notices the locket hanging around Harry’s neck and realizes what happened. HERMIONE Of course…Harry hand me the Horcrux. The locket Harry give it to me! Harry takes it from around his neck and hands it to Hermione and his expression immediately changes. HERMIONE Better? HARRY Yeah, loads better. HERMIONE I think it’s better if we take turns wearing it. It obviously affects anyone who wears it. It’s too much of a burden for someone to carry alone anyways. HARRY Thanks Hermione He looks at her and smiles and she smiles back at him and the camera pans up at Ron looking at them from inside the tent. He turns to walk away. INT. THE TENT-WOODS-NIGHT The scene cuts to Ron sleeping in the tent and Harry is sitting up looking at the Mauraders map. HARRY I hope you’re okay Ginny…. The camera then zooms over Harry’s shoulder and close to the map and the scene switches to another shot of Hogwarts. The scene then cuts to INT. HOGWARTS-DEFENSE AGAINST THE DARK ARTS CLASS-DAY One of the Death Eaters Amycus Carrow is sitting in front of the class and there’s a student laying on the floor crying. Standing beside him is Goyle with his wand held out. AMYCUS This is what happens to bad children! (Laughs) So much like your father you are. Watch class, this is what happens when you step out of line. Mr. Goyle if you please! GOYLE Crucio!!! The student on the floor screams in pain. The camera pans to Neville with anger in his eyes as he jumps up. NEVILLE STOP IT! Goyle and the Amycus both look up. AMYCUS Problem Mr. Longbottom? You don’t want me to send you to detention do you? (Laughs) You’re a Pure Blood Longbottom. Filthy half breeds like this shouldn’t be in this school and you know it! NEVILLE They have every right! AMYCUS Watch your tongue! Now Longbottom I think it’s best if you participate in today’s lesson. You know what to do. Practice the Crucatus curse on this Mudblood NEVILLE NO! I won’t do it! AMYCUS (He walks slowly up to Neville) Pity… Amycus pulls out a knife and SWOOSH slashes it across Neville’s cheek. Neville falls to the ground in pain as Amycus walks back in front of the class. AMYCUS Anyone else has anything to say? INT. HOGWARTS-COURTYARD-EVENING The scene cuts to Neville sitting in the Courtyard with a bandage on his cheek and LUNA and Ginny sitting beside him. LUNA That was a brave thing you did Neville. Standing up to him like that. GINNY This is ridiculous. (She looks at a kid chained to a statue in the courtyard) That’s horrible…This isn’t Hogwarts anymore. LUNA But we’re still here, that means Dumbledore’s Army lives on right? NEVILLE Exactly. As long as I can I won’t let harm come to anyone innocent at this school. He stands up, pulls out his wand to free the child until SMACK he’s hit with a spell from his left. Ginny and Luna rush to his side and standing there is Alecto Carrow. ALECTO I hope you weren’t thinking about freeing that boy Longbottom? GINNY You monster! ALECTO Watch you’re tongue Weasley before it’s cut out. Get out of here all three of you! Filthy Mudbloods deserve to be punished. LUNA Funny…I wonder how much Muggle blood you have running through your veins. SMACK Luna is slapped by Alecto with brute force and she looks up with blood running down her nose. ALECTO You will pay for that Lovegood! She marches away angrily and blasts a student as she walks by. NEVILLE I wish Harry was here. I wish I knew what they were up to and that we could somehow help. GINNY Maybe we can…. INT. HEADMASTERS OFFICE-HOGWARTS-NIGHT The scene cuts to the SPINNING GARGOYLE. Ginny, Neville, and Luna walk out and into Snape’s office. NEVILLE You sure this will help? GINNY Dad told me that Harry was left Gryffindor’s Sword, it’s rightfully Harry’s. LUNA I hope Seamus’s distraction keeps Snape long enough. NEVILLE Where do you think it is. Ginny looks around and notices the Sword sitting in a mirror case on the wall. GINNY There (She pulls out her wand) ACCIO GRYFFINDOR SWORD SMASH the glass of the case shatters everywhere as the sword comes flying at them. Ginny quicky grabs it by the handle and looks at it. GINNY Great…lets go…. They turn around and freeze because standing in front of them is Snape holding on to SEAMUS. SNAPE And what exactly do you think you’re doing? The three of them back away as the camera pans away out of the window and through the clouds. SWOOSH there is a wide shot of the forest and it is now Fall. Leaves are falling everywhere as the camera zooms in on the tent. |
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