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Old October 12th, 2007, 8:58 pm
ArryGrotter's Avatar
ArryGrotter  Male.gif ArryGrotter is offline
Too... Much... Fangirling...
 
Join Date: 17th October 2005
Location: Auckland, NZ
Age: 27
Posts: 3,281
Re: Fan Scripts: Remake Harry Potter

I must say, cutting is hard.

I'm back to the 'I've written tons' part, so am cutting, or trying.

I have 28 scenes to fiddle with
---

I've just finished my cut for 'The Letters from No One'. I cut like two lines. The only other part I felt I could cut was Railview Hotel, but part of me wants to keep it.

Should I keep it?

Option A:    


  
PS:The Letters From No One+HotelINT. HALL - 4 PRIVET DRIVE - CONTINUOUS ACTION - MORNING (29/7/1991)

Vernon slams the door so that none of the letters, which are still flying around the kitchen, don't reach the other room.

He speaks threatening, as though he is losing it.

VERNON DURSLEY
That does it. We're going away. Just pack some clothes. No arguments!

EXT. RAILVIEW HOTEL, COKEWORTH - EVENING (29/7/1991)

A gloomy-looking hotel. Night. A train goes by on the nearby railway.

Fades to:

EXT. RAILVIEW HOTEL, COKEWORTH - MORNING (30/7/1991)

The same hotel. Morning.

INT. DINING ROOM - RAILVIEW HOTEL, COKEWORTH - MORNING (30/7/1991)

The Dursleys and Harry are eating breakfast. The HOTEL OWNER comes over to them (Carrying a LETTER)

HOTEL OWNER
'Scuse me, but is one of you Mr H. Potter?

Both Harry and Vernon look up.

HOTEL OWNER
Only I got about a hundred of these at the front desk.

She holds up the letter. It reads "Mr H. Potter, Room 17, Railview Hotel, Cokeworth". Harry tries to grab it, but his reach is knocked away by Vernon...

VERNON DURSLEY
I'll take them

...as he stands up to get the rest. The Hotel Owner stared.

INT. DURSLEY'S CAR - COAST - LATE AFTERNOON (30/7/1991)

PETUNIA DURSLEY
Wouldn't it be better just to go home?

Vernon ignores her, gets out of the car and locks Petunia, Dudley and Harry in it. THUNDER.

DUDLEY DURSLEY
Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he?

RAINDROPS fall onto the car.

The doors are unlocked and opened as Vernon arrives back.

VERNON DURSLEY
Found the perfect place.
  



Option B:    


  
PS:The Letters From No OneINT. HALL - 4 PRIVET DRIVE - CONTINUOUS ACTION - MORNING (29/7/1991)

Vernon slams the door so that none of the letters, which are still flying around the kitchen, don't reach the other room.

He speaks threatening, as though he is losing it.

VERNON DURSLEY
That does it. We're going away. Just pack some clothes. No arguments!

INT. DURSLEY'S CAR - COAST - LATE AFTERNOON (30/7/1991)

PETUNIA DURSLEY
Wouldn't it be better just to go home?

Vernon ignores her, gets out of the car and locks Petunia, Dudley and Harry in it. THUNDER.

DUDLEY DURSLEY
Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he?

RAINDROPS fall onto the car.

The doors are unlocked and opened as Vernon arrives back.

VERNON DURSLEY
Found the perfect place.
  



Update: I have decided to rid the hotel, hence changing the dates (not that it really matters)

I've finished the third draft as I called it to the shack point.

First>Third differences.
55>33 scenes
33>23 pages
24>16 speaking characters



Last edited by ArryGrotter; October 14th, 2007 at 4:46 am. Reason: I'm Bored
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