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Old December 22nd, 2007, 6:30 am
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Phrozenone  Male.gif Phrozenone is offline
Fourth Year
Join Date: 28th May 2006
Location: Arizona
Posts: 608
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Originally Posted by IenjoyAcidPops View Post
Wow, Phrozenone, that is a lot, but it's pretty good, most of it. I mean, some dialogue could use some tweaking, but it's certainly not horrible. You really pared down "The Dark Lord Ascending" and "The Dursleys Departing"; I'm in the process of doing the same for my script, but I am going for longer than yours (or at least the one you just posted). Interesting choice to have Arthur deliver the items in DD's will; I'd just keep Scrimgeour. but that's just me. Now onto a couple particular things of interest:
Well if most of it is good then I've done my job

Honestly I wrote this maybe...3 weeks after DH was released so I had all these ideas going through my head. 'The Dark Lord Ascending' and 'The Dursleys Departing'...I guess I did kinda cut those down to their bare basics huh? lol (Just wait until you see the's MURDER!)Trust me there was ALOT more in it at first and I can't wait to see your version. I love seeing how many different ways people can interpret one story, it amazes me. I go off the wall and cut things and change things and add things to try to make it flow better and keep it a short running time...whereas others are more for detail and sticking close to canon and I LOVE it Hard core book fans would HATE me lol

I must say, this I don't care for. One reason Harry likes (loves) Ginny so much is because she's more restrained emotionally. She doesn't cry easily, and I don't think Hedwig's death would be that occasion. Sorry if that came off harsh.
You are correct! Point well taken actually I never really thought about it. I just wanted tears and gosh darn it I picked the sexist of me...shame...maybe I'll have Shacklebolt cry?

On the other hand, this I love so much I laughed out loud with happinness. I never really felt like we needed to see the duel, but that moment and quote almost has me changing my mind. I can really hear Gambon saying that, too. You know what? It reminds me of that bit in PoA where first, in The Great Hall, Dumbledore gives his speech and does that thing where he waves his hand and puts out the flame, and then later, in his Patronus lesson, Harry does the same gesture, just as a little bit of business. Subtle, but I really liked that mirroring, you know?
Oh you like it? Wow. Thanks! I was for sure that section would get me the most trouble from the fans. You're ABSOLUTELY right about the mirroring thing and that's EXACTLY what I was going for. I remember thinking "How EXACTLY can I make this wand business not that complicated and show the chain of it" and not knowing EXACTLY how the fight went I thought 'Hey if Dumbledore finishes off Grindewald the same way Draco got the wand from him and the way Harry wins it back in the end the connection would be so much stronger' and that's what I went for.

That line...remember what you said about about trying to right using the actors mannerisms and such? That's what I did there. I'm glad you liked most of it.

(Did you notice my little nod to Ron's book on how to please young witches? I'd forgotten I'd put that in there and just LOL'd as I was reading through it )

Last edited by Phrozenone; December 22nd, 2007 at 6:32 am.
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