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  #21  
Old November 26th, 2008, 5:37 am
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

From "Futurama"
Professor Farnsworth: Oh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. 'I'm my own grandpa'! Let's just steal the damn dish and get out of here! Screw history! (Roswell That Ends Well)

Bender: Bodies are for hookers and fat people! (A Head in the Polls)

Professor Farnsworth: What are those horrible creatures?
Glurmo: Those are the Grunka-Lunkas. They work in the factory.
Professor Farnsworth: Tell them I hate them! (Fry and the Slurm Factory)

That's just a few for now.


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  #22  
Old November 28th, 2008, 4:38 am
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

From "The Simpsons"
Homer: To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. (Homer vs. the 18th Amendment)

Belle: Are you wearing a grocery bag?
Homer: I have misplaced my pants. (Bart After Dark)

From "Futurama"
Professor Farnsworth: While you were gone, the Globetrotters held a press conference to announce that I was a jive sucka! (Time Keeps On Skipping)

Fry: Bender? Bender? Have you seen my sombrero? (I Second That Emotion)

Linda: At least all those windmills will keep them cool.
Morbo: WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY! (Crimes of the Hot)

From "The Office"
Dwight: My father's name? Dwight Schrute. His father's name? Dwight Schrute. His father's name? Dweide Schrude. Amish. (Drug Testing)


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  #23  
Old December 12th, 2008, 4:01 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Patient: Are you a doctor?

Jarod: I am today

--The Pretender.


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  #24  
Old December 17th, 2008, 9:35 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mad_Druid View Post
Patient: Are you a doctor?

Jarod: I am today

--The Pretender.
I love that line too .

Man I miss that show, it was so fun to watch every week, not to mention the banter between Ms. Parker and Jarod was just a hoot to watch .


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  #25  
Old December 17th, 2008, 10:31 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

"The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother! I call him Gamblor, and its time to snatch your mother back from his neon claws!"

(The Simpsons)


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  #26  
Old December 18th, 2008, 5:49 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

It is from the first episode of Veronica Mars (the best tv show ever!)..."Life sucks... then you die".... It is morbid but perfect at times ...


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Old January 27th, 2009, 11:06 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Mighty B:

"Don't listen to it man, it's how the government controls your mind!" - Weird Hippie Dude

"I'm flying! My father was wrong!" - Penny and Weird Hippie Dude


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  #28  
Old January 29th, 2009, 7:17 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

I found some of mine...

Murphy Brown -- source for most of the Murphy Brown quotes

[the night before Corky marries Will]

Corky: [sobbing] I haven't experienced life!
Murphy: I've experienced life, and I'm here to tell you it's overrated.


Murphy: Men are like soap bars - one is great, two make you throw up.


Jim: I can't hear you. My flesh is being consumed by acid.


Kay: Oh, good morning, my little worker ants! That's just a figure of speech; I would NEVER compare you to insects. At least not after that sensitivity training seminar those maggots at the network forced me to attend!


Murphy: I was waiting for the universe to dispense some justice but sometimes the universe is just too dang slow. The effects of putting Nair in someone's styling gel, however only take a few minutes.


Law and Order -- source for some of the quotes

Just gotta love Jerry Orbach !!

Conduct Unbecoming

Navy Lawyer: Our common goal is punishing a criminal... The military moves to a much quicker beat.
Lennie: You know, Lieutenant, I never had much of a sense of rhythm.


Mother Love

(Making an arrest)
OK. Sing along with me Skate. You know the words. You're under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...


Progenitor

Lab Technician: It's a photocopy from a machine with dirt on the drums... If you get me the machine and it hasn't been serviced, I can maybe do a positive I.D.
Lennie: Oh, great. We'll organize a line-up of Xerox machines.


Purple Heart

Mike (looking at a jar found in a discarded jacket): Kinda looks like Silly Putty.
Lennie: Great. We look for a gigantic first grader.



M*A*S*H -- source for some of these quotes

Flagg: I want to make a call.
Henry: Can I get the number for you?
Flagg: I don't know the number.
Henry: Well, then, how can you make the call?
Flagg: I have to throw up. The number's in a capsule.
Henry: Well. I'll just run along.
A Smattering of Intelligence


Flagg: I've got to nip this rotten apple in the bud! This sort of action's contagious. One man decides he's not gonna fight, it catches on, the next thing, you know what you've got on your hands?
B.J.: Peace?
Quo Vadis, Captain Chandler


Flagg: Don't play dumb! You're not as good at it as I am! (Way to go, Captain Obvious !!)
Rally around the Flagg, Boys


Hawkeye: Frank, I happen to be an officer only because I foolishly opened an invitation from President Truman to come to this costume party. And as for my ability as a doctor, if you seriously question that, I'm afraid I'll just have to challenge you to a duel.
Trapper: Swords or pistols?
Hawkeye: I'm thinking specimen bottles at twenty paces.
Frank: There are ladies present.
Hawkeye: Sorry, baby.
Margaret: Major to you.
Hawkeye: Sorry, Major baby.
Pilot


Potter: Where's your gun?
Hawkeye: Sulking under my cot. We're not on speaking terms.
Potter: Go kiss and makeup. You're taking it with you.
Hawkeye: Colonel, if I touch that gun, I'll just trigger another arguement.
Potter: Pierce, you are taking your sidearm!
Hawkeye, holding up each arm in turn: Correct. I'm taking my right side arm and my left side arm.
Hawkeye Get Your Gun


Potter: I said fire that weapon!
Hawkeye: All right. (to the gun) You're fired. (to Potter) I did it as gently as I could.
Potter: That was an order, Pierce.
Hawkeye, snapping his fingers: Oh waiter, would you take this man's order, please?
Hawkeye Get Your Gun


Potter: Take your seat, Pierce.
Hawkeye: Uh uh. Sorry. I can take umbrage, I can take the cake, I can take the A-Train, I can take two and call me in the morning, but I cannot take this sitting down. Now, if you excuse me, I'm going to take five.
Goodbye, Farewell, Amen


Trapper: Somebody sneaked in here and committed a neatness!
The Moose

Radar, seeing Klinger in pants: Don't I know your sister?
The Army-Navy Game

Frank: Klinger! I want to see you out of that dress!
Klnger: Never on a first date, sir!
A Full Rich Day

Frank: How dare you wear that hat while in uniform?
Klinger: It's spring, sir!
Welcome to Korea

Frank: What are those earrings doing in your ears?
Klinger: Just hanging there, sir.
Welcome to Korea

Officer: Klinger, I'm here to relieve you.
Klinger: Good. Undo my bra.
The Abduction of Margret Houlihan

Klinger singing: Oh some guys like the army,
I think that it's a mess.
If it's so danged terrific,
How come I wear a dress?
Movie Tonight

Radar: Hi Klinger, how's it going?
Klinger: I'm eating a jeep.
Radar: Good.
38 Across


Some of my favorite Simpsons quotes: source for some of the Simpsons ones source for some more


Ralph: Are you still my friend, Bart?

Wiggum: Put out an APB on a Uosdwis R. Dewoh. Uh, better start with Greektown.

Friday: That's "Homer J. Simpson", Chief. You're reading it upside down.

Wiggum: Uh, cancel that APB. But, uh, bring back some of them, uh, gyros.

Friday: Uh, Chief? You're talking into your wallet.


Homer: Lisa, would you like a donut?

Lisa: No, thanks. Do you have any fruit?

Homer: This has purple in it. Purple is a fruit. (since when has it been one?? )



Homer: "Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?"


Lennie: So then I said to the cop, "No, you're driving under the influence of... being a jerk."



Homer's Brain: Use reverse psychology.

Homer: Oh, that sounds too complicated.

Homer's Brain: Okay, I don't use reverse psychology.

Homer: Okay I will! (nice )



Scully: Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?

Homer: Yes. (lie detector blows up)



Ralph: Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!



Homer (sung to the Flintstones song): Simpson! Homer Simpson! He's the greatest guy in history. From the, town of Springfield! He's about to hit a chestnut tree! (hits tree) D-oh!




Billy Corgan: "Billy Corgan, 'Smashing Pumpkins'."

Homer Simpson: "Homer Simpson, smiling politely."



Trent: [walking up] The man knows what he likes.

Homer: Just taking care of business.

Trent: If you don't, who will, huh? Trent Steele.

Homer: Homer Si... uh, Max Power.

Trent: Oh, hey! Great name!

Homer: Yeah, isn't it? I got it off of a hair dryer.

Trent: [laughs] I like a man who can poke fun at himself. [looks at his watch] Ooh, hey, my one o' clock cancelled. Eh, you had any lunch?

Homer: Yeah, but I usually have three or four.

Trent: So where to eat? You like Thai?

Homer: Tie good. You like shirt?




Homer: Well, what do you think, Marge? All I need is a title. I was thinking along the lines of... No Tv and no beer make Homer go something something.

Marge: Go crazy?

Homer: Don't mind if I do!



Some of my favorite tv and movie quotes in no particular order:

Golden Girls -- source for some of these quotes


Sophia: Rose, I need some advice too.

Rose: You need advice from ME?

Sophia: Yeah, frightening, isn't it.



Sophia: Jealousy is a very ugly thing, Dorothy! – And so are you, in anything backless.




The Pretender -- source for some of these quotes


Pilot

"Ma'am, the materials on board are highly explosive" -- Sailor, indicating Miss Parker's cigarette
"So am I" -- Miss Parker



Scott Free

"I like ice cream. I really like ice cream" -- Jarod I like it too!!



Collateral Damage

"Ram - who?" -- Jarod inquiring after a reference to 'Rambo'



Unforgotten Amnesia Clip Show

"I don't care what it cost" -- Miss Parker to Broots
"Well that's good because Jarod charged it to your calling card" -- Broots to Miss Parker

"Did you tell them where you are?" -- Jarod to Argyle
"What do I look like, a road sign?" -- Argyle to Jarod



Back to the Future -- source for some of the quotes source for some of the others source for some of the others as well


Mr. Strickland: I noticed your band is on the roster for the dance auditions after school today. Why even bother, McFly? You don't have a chance, you're too much like your old man. No McFly ever amounted to anything in the history of Hill Valley!

Marty McFly: Yeah, well, history is gonna change.



Biff Tannen: Since you're new here, I'm gonna cut you a break... today. So, why don't you make like a tree and get out of here?



[last lines]
Dr. Emmett Brown: Roads? Where we're going we don't need roads. -- this is my all time favorite line !!


[repeated Line]
Dr. Emmett Brown: Great Scott!



Robin Hood: Men in Tights -- source for some of these quotes


Achoo: Hey, Blinkin!

Blinkin: Did you say "Abe Lincoln"?


Little John: Let me introduce you to my best friend: Will Scarlet.

Scarlet: Scarlet's my middle name. My full name is Will Scarlet O'Hara.

[pause]

Scarlet: We're from Georgia.


Man in church: Hey Abbot!

Abbot: I hate that guy! -- Abbot and Costello reference perhaps ??


Robin Hood: Blinkin, listen to me. They've taken the castle!

Blinkin: I thought it felt a bit drafty. Cor, this never would have happened if your father was alive.

Robin Hood: He's dead?

Blinkin: Yes.

Robin Hood: And my mother?

Blinkin: She died of pneumonia while... oh, you were away...

Robin Hood: My brothers?

Blinkin: There were all killed by the plague.

Robin Hood: My dog, Pogo?

Blinkin: Run over by a carriage.

Robin Hood: My goldfish, Goldie?

Blinkin: Eaten by the cat.

Robin Hood: [on the verge of tears] My cat?

Blinkin: Choked on the goldfish.

[pause]

Blinkin: Oh, it's good to be home, ain't it, Master Robin?

- this was one of the saddest yet ironic moments in the movie...


Sheriff of Rottingham: You know, this wasn't a very smart thing to do, Locksley. I'll pay for this!

[pause]

Sheriff of Rottingham: YOU'LL pay for this!


Robin Hood: As my first order of business, I would like to appoint a new Sheriff... my friend Achoo.

Crowd: A black sheriff?

Blinkin: He's black?

Achoo: And why not? It worked in Blazing Saddles. -- Achoo rules!!


Robin Hood: By the by, do you know praying mantis?

Achoo: You're looking at him.


[Robin tries to jump on his horse and falls]

Achoo: Man, white men can't jump.


Sheriff of Rottingham: He "deered" to kill a King's dare.

Sheriff of Rottingham: [realizing he said it wrong] He dared to kill a King's deer.


Some of my favorite House-isms -- source for some of these quotes


Cuddy:"You. In the lobby. Now."

House:"I hurt my leg. I have a note."

- Kids


Chase:"House never gives speeches."

House:"But when I really believe in something, gosh dang it, I gotta chance to make a difference here."

- Role Model


"Everybody's great when they're half-dead." -- that's me in the morning...

- Euphoria, Part 1


"I'm a night owl. Wilson's an early bird. We're different species."

- Sleeping Dogs Lie

Here are some more of my favorite quotes:

Frasier -- source for some of these quotes

[Cooking with Daphne]
Niles: Whisk.
[she hands it to him, he whisks]
Niles: Spoon.
[she hands it to him, he stirs]
Niles: Cheese cloth.
[she wipes his brow; the oven pings]
Niles: Perfect timing. Daphne, open the oven.
[he places it in the oven]
Niles: Ready.
Daphne: Shall I close, Dr. Crane?
Niles: Please.
Daphne: Do you think it'll be all right?
Niles: It's out of our hands now, Daphne.

[Niles watches Martin working out a chess problem]
Niles: Uh-uh.
[Martin reaches for another piece]
Niles: Mmm-mmm.
Martin: All right, what would you do?
Niles: Well for starters, I'd take that corn-nut off the board.
Martin: That corn-nut's my bishop. Eddie ate the real one.
Niles: In that case, Corn-nut to Rook Seven.

Frasier: Niles, is there a light bulb over my head?
Niles: You have an idea?
Frasier: No, I'm asking if there's actually a light bulb over my head.

[Daphne is contemplating what it would be like to have a free lifetimes supply of muffins]
Daphne: Now me, I could eat a muffin a day, some days even two knowing they'd be free. So that'd be... ten a week, fifty-two weeks a year, for at least another... forty years, which works out to... Twenty thousand muffins!
[pause]
Daphne: My life suddenly seems long, measured in muffins.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

*note to Mods: I did my best to find the sources for all of these quotes... and if there are any that I missed, source wise, I'm sorry . There's only so much that I could do, since it's been so long since I posted this originally.


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RIP Uncle Bob . 1933-2016 Thanks for everything and thanks for the memories. We love you and miss you.


RIP my older cat. I'll miss you, my wonderful furry friend. RIP Anthony Bourdain.

RIP Harry Anderson, aka: Judge Stone (Night Court). Thanks for the memories.

Sad about the upcoming closing of the forums, but I won't forget you guys, thanks for the memories!

Proud fan of the TV show, The X Files and proud shipper of Mulder and Scully!!

RIP Toys R' Us. Once a Toys R' Us Kid, always one.

Last edited by Fawkesfan1; November 21st, 2011 at 11:52 pm.
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  #29  
Old January 29th, 2009, 7:30 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

from friends one of my all time favorites...

Joey - "Look at me--I'm Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes? Maybe if I wasn't going commando!"

From big bang theory

Penny: Hey, if you guys need a fourth, I'll play.
Leonard: Great idea!
Sheldon: Uh, no. The wheel was a great idea. Relativity was a great idea. This is a notion, and a rather sucky one at that.
Penny: Why?!
Sheldon: Why? Oho, Penny, Penny, Penny.
Penny: Oho, what, what, what?
Sheldon: (as Penny picks up the controller) This is a complex battle simulation with a steep learning curve. There are a myriad of weapons, vehicles, and strategies to master, and not to mention an extremely intricate back story.
Penny: (explosion from the TV) Oh, cool! Whose head did I just blow off?
Sheldon: Mine.

I don't know how, but she is cheating! Nobody can be that attractive and this good at a videogame.
-Sheldon (about Penny)

Penny: Wait, Sheldon come back. You forgot something.
Sheldon: What?
Penny: This plasma grenade.(Explosion sound on the tv)
Penny: Ha. Look it's raining you.
Sheldon: You laugh now, but wait till you need tech support.

Sheldon: I'm not insane! My mother had me tested!


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  #30  
Old January 30th, 2009, 5:14 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

I know it's not a sit-com or soap or anything but...Strictly Come Dancing:

Len: If [insert unlikely event], I'll pickle me walnuts!


Friends:

Joey (to Ross, r.e. Rachael going to Paris): Now that you and her are going to be on different continents...[turns to Phoebe] Right?...

(about Rachel's awful "trifle")
Ross: it tastes like feet!
Joey: I like it.
Ross:...
Joey: What? What's not to like? Jam: goooood; custard: goooood; meat: gooooooooooooood!

(When Chandler is locked out of the big appartment)
(Joey fiddles with lock...nothing happens. Chandler tries the handle again and it's still jammed.)
Chandler: it didn't work.
Joey: Hang on, I'm not finished yet...
(Joey walks back into his appartemnet, then comes flying across the hall and smashed the door down)
Chandler: you are quite the craftsman, Joe.


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  #31  
Old February 3rd, 2009, 10:26 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Some more of my favorites:

The X-Files -- source for some of these quotes source for some these quotes

Arcadia

SCULLY: The local police department were at a dead end so they turned to the FBI. AD Skinner, in assigning us this case, thought a fruitful approach to the investigation would be if we went undercover posing as prospective home buyers as this planned community would seem to hide a dark, possibly murderous conspiracy of silence.
MULDER: You want to make that honeymoon video now? ( )
SCULLY: Rob and Laura Petrie?
MULDER: "Pee-trie."
SCULLY: Mulder, if we ever go undercover again I get to choose the names, okay?

SCULLY: This tells me that you're not taking this seriously.
MULDER: I'm taking it seriously. I just don't understand why we're on it. It's our first catch back on the X-Files. This isn't an X-File.
SCULLY: Sure it is. It's unexplained. What do you want, aliens? Tractor beams?
MULDER: Wow. Admit it, you just want to play house. Woman, get back in here and make me a sandwich!



(MULDER, SCULLY and PAT VERLANDER enter the house. It is sparkling clean.)
MULDER: Wow. The photos did not do it justice.
(Behind them, some other neighbors are already bringing in boxes and pieces of furniture.)
PAT VERLANDER: (quietly, to other neighbors) Guys, fast, fast now. Come on.
(MULDER smiles down at SCULLY, and pats her on the shoulders. She turns, probably expecting him to help her with the heavy basket, but he turns away looking at the house. She pauses a moment, then sets the basket down on a chair that someone has just carried in.)
MULDER: The previous owners left it so clean.
PAT VERLANDER: What do you do for a living Mr... Petrie? That's right, isn't it?
MULDER: (big grin, putting his arm around SCULLY's shoulders and hugging her) Yeah, I, uh... I work mostly at home which is great for Laura because she gets me all to herself. ( rather ironic considering they live together now )
PAT VERLANDER: (laughing) Oh.



MULDER: Oh, yeah. Nothing weird going on around here. (following SCULLY) Hey... ooh, wait a minute. You didn't let me carry you over the threshold.
(SCULLY takes off her coat and faces MULDER.)
SCULLY: You ready?
MULDER: Let's get it on, honey.
SCULLY: (smiles) All right, then. (She hands him a pair of latex gloves and goes to the box that BIG MIKE dropped and opens it. Sound of glass rattling. She pulls out a piece of broken lab equipment and sighs.)


I just love this part --


(SCULLY comes out of the bathroom. She has a terrycloth headband and her face is covered in a bright green mud mask. MULDER looks up and is startled by her appearance. Very funny.)


MULDER: Whoa!


(She throws the sweatshirt at his head.)
MULDER: Compulsive neatness, or a lack thereof. Have you noticed how everybody around here is obsessed with the neighborhood rules and the CC&Rs? You know what? You fit in really well here.
SCULLY: (pointedly looking at him lying on the bed) And you don't.
MULDER: (adjusting the pillows to make himself more comfortable) Well, anyway, tomorrow I got a, uh, a surefire way of testing out my theory.
(He puts the bed beside him seductively and waggles his eyebrows at her. She raises her eyebrows at him.)


MULDER: (coaxing) Come on, Laura, you know... we're married now.
SCULLY: Scully, Mulder. Good night.
(MULDER gets up from the bed taking a pillow. He pauses next to her.)
MULDER: The thrill is gone. (As he heads off to sleep wherever it is he's going to sleep, SCULLY sighs and goes to the bed.)


WIN SHROEDER: Oh! Oh, Rob, Laura. ("accidentally?" sprays their legs with the hose) I'm so sorry. So, good morning. So how was your first night? Peaceful?
MULDER: (looking fondly at SCULLY) Oh, it was wonderful. We just spooned up and fell asleep like little baby cats. Isn't that right, Honeybunch?
SCULLY: (forced smile) That's right, Poopyhead. Win, are we in the right place? I thought this was Big Mike's house. (rather true now -- IWTB bed scene for the win ....)



The Unnatural


SCULLY: Mulder, it is such a gorgeous day outside. Have you ever entertained the idea of trying to find life on this planet?
MULDER: I have seen the life on this planet, Scully, and that is exactly why I am looking elsewhere.


SCULLY: It's not ice cream. It's a non-fat tofutti rice dreamsicle.
MULDER: Ugh. Bet the air in my mouth tastes better than that. You sure know how to live it up, Scully.
SCULLY: Oh, you're Mr. Live-it-up. Mulder, you're really Mr. Squeeze-every-last-drop-out-of-this-sweet-life, aren't you?


SCULLY: On this precious Saturday you've got us grabbing life by the testes stealing reference books from the FBI library in order to go through New Mexico newspaper obituaries for the years 1940 to 1949 and for what joyful purpose?
MULDER: Looking for anomalies, Scully. Do you know how many so-called "flying disc" reports there were in New Mexico in the 1940s?
SCULLY: I don't care. Mulder, this is a needle in a haystack. These poor souls have been dead for 50 years. Let them rest in peace. Let sleeping dogs lie.
MULDER: No, I won't sit idly by as you hurl cliches at me. Preparation is the father of inspiration.
SCULLY: Necessity is the mother of invention.
MULDER: The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom.
SCULLY: Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we may die.
MULDER: I scream, you scream, we all scream for non-fat tofutti rice dreamsicles.





(Night. MULDER is at a baseball field hitting balls fired from a pitching machine. He is wearing a baseball jersey - Gibson, #20, the Grays. SCULLY walks around the fence and watches him.)
SCULLY: So, uh... I get this message marked "urgent" on my answering service from one Fox Mantle telling me to come down to the park for a very special very early or very late birthday present. And, Mulder... I don't see any nicely wrapped presents lying around so, what gives?
MULDER: You've never hit a baseball, have you, Scully?
SCULLY: No, I guess I have, uh... found more necessary things to do with my time than ... (a foul ball hits the fence) … slap a piece of horsehide with a stick.
MULDER: Get over here, Scully.
(MULDER holds the bat out for her. SCULLY walks over and takes it. MULDER steps behind her and wraps his arms around her tightly, also holding the bat around her hands.)
SCULLY: (warily, not thrilled) This my birthday present, Mulder? You shouldn't have.
MULDER: This ain't cheap. I'm paying that kid ten bucks an hour to shag balls.
(Camera shows POORBOY smiling and standing beside the batting machine.)
MULDER: Hey, it's not a bad piece of ash, huh?
(SCULLY gives him a "Look.")
MULDER: The bat-talking about the bat. Now, don't strangle it. You just want to shake hands with it. "Hello, Mr. Bat. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance." "Oh, no, no, Ms. Scully. The pleasure's all mine."
( SCULLY laughs as their hands grip the bat.)
MULDER: Okay, now, we want to... we want to go hips before hands, okay? (holds his hand a few inches from her hip) We want to stride forward and turn. That's all we're thinking about. So, we go hips... before hands, all right?
(He gingerly touches her hip and with his hands and his own hips pressed against her, turns her the right way.)
SCULLY: Okay.
MULDER: One more time.
(He touches and turns her hips more confidently.)
MULDER: Hips... before hands, all right?
SCULLY: Yeah.
MULDER: What is it?
SCULLY: Hips before hands.
MULDER: (speaking right into her ear) Right. We're going to wait on the pitch. We're going to keep our eye on the ball. Then, we're just going to make contact. We're not going to think. We're just going to let it fly, Scully, okay?
SCULLY: Mm-hmm.
MULDER: Ready?
(MULDER tries to readjust their grips on the bat. Momentary hand struggle between them.)
SCULLY: I'm in the middle.
(She gets her hands back between his. They are both grinning - very cute.)
MULDER: All right, fire away, Poorboy.
(A ball comes to them and they hit it. It goes way foul.)
MULDER: Ooh! That's good. All right, what you may find is you concentrate on hitting that little ball... The rest of the world just fades away-- all your everyday, nagging concerns.
( Scully giggles. They hit the ball again.)
MULDER: The ticking of your biological clock.
(Another hit.)
MULDER: How you probably couldn't afford that nice, new suede coat on a G-Woman's salary.
(Another hit.)
MULDER: How you threw away a promising career in medicine... (intimately into her ear) … to hunt aliens with a crackpot, albeit brilliant, partner.
(He gets another "Look.")
MULDER: Getting into the heart of a global conspiracy. Your obscenely overdue triple-X bill. Oh, I... I'm sorry, Scully. Those last two problems are mine, not yours.
(Another hit.)
SCULLY: (with a big smile) Shut up, Mulder. I'm playing baseball. (They continue to hit the balls. SCULLY laughs. As the balls fly up into the black, star-studded night sky, we see them turn into shooting stars.)



Detour


(SCULLY sits back down and tries to pull MULDER onto her lap.)
MULDER: I don’t wanna wrestle.
SCULLY: (suppressing a laugh) Get over here. I’m going to try and keep you warm. ( MULDER lies in her lap. She accidentally rubs his wounded shoulder. It hurts him.) Sorry.
MULDER: One of us has got to stay awake, Scully.
SCULLY: You sleep, Mulder.
MULDER: If you get tired, you wake me.
SCULLY: I’m not going to get tired.
MULDER: Why don’t you sing .. something.
SCULLY: No ... Mulder.
MULDER: Well, if you sing something, I’ll know you’re awake.
SCULLY: Mulder, you don’t want me to sing. I can’t carry a tune.
MULDER: It doesn’t matter. Just sing anything.
(Loooong pause. SCULLY looks around.)
SCULLY: (slightly off key, no enthusiasm) Jeremiah was a bull frog ---
(MULDER’S eyes pop open.)
SCULLY: ... was a good friend of mine. Never understood a single word he said...
(MULDER or *Duchovny?* pulls up knees to hide his face.)
SCULLY: ... but I helped him drink his wine.
(Pause.)
MULDER: Chorus.
SCULLY: Joy .... to the world. All the boys and girls. Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea. Joy to you and me. (Camera pans over to a tree where we see glowing red eyes.)



SCULLY: Mulder, you need to keep warm. Your body’s still in shock.
MULDER: I was told once that the best way to regenerate body heat was to crawl naked into a sleeping bag with some body else who’s already naked. (Snuggles closer.)
SCULLY: Well, maybe if it rains sleeping bags, you’ll get lucky. ( one of my favorite lines )



I Want to believe

From the now infamous bed scene ( yep, bed scene -- I'm STILL not used to saying that one )

Mulder: I can feel you thinking.
Scully: Sorry. I can't sleep.
Mulder: Actually, I have a little something for that. ( Mulder, Mulder, Mulder -- still trying to get it to rain sleeping bags -- now they do, just not on that night, due to the studio audience )
Scully: Just a little something?
Mulder: Thank you.


Scully: What is it that you were praying for in there, sir?
Father Joe: For the salvation of my immortal soul.
Scully: And you think God hears your prayers?
Father Joe: You think he hears yours?
Scully: I wasn't the one who buggered 37 altar boys. ( Oooh, Scully )
Mulder: Hmmm, well that was a rather colorful way of putting it.
Scully: I have another word I could use, if you'd like.
Mulder: I'm sure you do.


---------------------------------------------

*note to Mods: I did my best to find the sources for all of these quotes... and if there are any that I missed, source wise, I'm sorry . There's only so much that I could do, since it's been so long since I posted this originally.


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RIP Harry Anderson, aka: Judge Stone (Night Court). Thanks for the memories.

Sad about the upcoming closing of the forums, but I won't forget you guys, thanks for the memories!

Proud fan of the TV show, The X Files and proud shipper of Mulder and Scully!!

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Last edited by Fawkesfan1; November 13th, 2018 at 12:27 am.
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  #32  
Old February 12th, 2009, 5:52 am
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Penny: I'm a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to know....
Sheldon: Yes... it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the sun's apparent position relevant to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality.

Sheldon: I’m polymerized tree sap and you’re an inorganic adhesive. So whatever verbal projectile you launch in my direction is reflected off of me, returned on its original trajectory, and adheres to you.

--The Big Bang Theory


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  #33  
Old February 12th, 2009, 9:01 am
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Judge Sanders: I will not have happiness in my court room!
(Boston Legal)

Morbo: Pathetic humans, prepare to write down the recipe!
(Futurama)

Phil Ken Sebben: I'm not a trainer but I do have this whip.
(Harvey Birdman)

Janitor: You look unhappy. I like that.
(Scrubs)


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  #34  
Old July 4th, 2009, 9:11 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

I have been watching Young Dracula again. It's a hilarious show.

-Ingrid: Do you swear on all that is morbidly evil not to tell a soul?
Robin: You're very pretty...
Ingrid: Yes, I am. Now swear!


Renfield: Are we all ready to spin the wheel of DNA?
Chloe: If this is science, I'm a banana.
Renfield: Shut it before I peel you, clever clogs. This is Transylvanian science. Much more accurate than boring British science.
Count Dracula: And it's entertaining

Vlad: Dad, you promised to be careful. Do I need to spell it out for you? M-O-B.
Count Dracula: I am Count Dracula, not spell Dracula.
Ingrid: M-O-B spells angry peasant mob howling for your dust.
Count Dracula: I know that, but I'm bored

Count Dracula is sitting in hospital, keeping company for his son. He has nicked a blood bag.
Count Dracula: Got a Straw?

(After Mr. Van Helsing thinks up a robotic surveillance plan)
Mr. Van Helsing: I have a plan!
Jonathan Van Helsing: Great! I'll call casualty


Renfield: Ummm.... Master? I was wondering will you be sitting on me much longer?
Count Dracula: Yeees. You're being punished. You've forgotten why you are doen there?
Renfield: I'm sorry master. I should never ever have done it. What was it again?
Count Dracula: It? IT was about this high with pink lipstick and wearing a dress. A succulent female skipped into the castle of her own free will and you let it get away.
Renfield: Oh yeaah.
Count Dracula: No one gets past Renfield the Repulsive.
Renfield: I... I didn't mean it. It will never ever happen again. I promise. Please, can I get up noe?
Count Dracula: I doubt it. I've stuck you to the floor.


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  #35  
Old July 5th, 2009, 12:46 am
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fury View Post
Lost

Sawyer: What's your problem, Jumbotron?
Hurley: Shut up, Red...neck...man!
Sawyer: Touché.

I love anything that Hurley says

and thanx Fawkesfan1 for highlighting several of my favorite scenes from XF Made my day.

The X-Files

[Izzy Berkowitz is using a peanut butter sandwich to lure The Great Mutato out of the woods]
Scully: "Peanut butter sandwiches?"
Mulder: "You think baloney would be more effective?"


Garry Shandling/Mulder: "I love you, Scully. No ifs, ands or..."
Téa Leoni/Scully: "Bees." [They kiss] "Wait, wait, Mulder... I can't."
Garry Shandling/Mulder: "I know this feels wrong because we're friends and we treat each other as equals, but..."
Téa Leoni/Scully: "No, no, it's not that. It's not that."
Garry Shandling/Mulder: "Well, what then?"
Téa Leoni/Scully: "I'm in love with Assistant Director Walter Skinner."
Mulder: "That's it, Scully, I can't take it any more."
Scully: "Shh, Mulder, sit down."
Garry Shandling/Mulder: "What does he have that I don't have?"
Téa Leoni/Scully: "A bigger flashlight."



Oh and the quote in my siggy always gets me Just the ways he says it makes me laugh


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  #36  
Old July 7th, 2009, 12:55 am
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Quote:
Originally Posted by magic_is_might View Post
I love anything that Hurley says

and thanx Fawkesfan1 for highlighting several of my favorite scenes from XF Made my day.

The X-Files

[Izzy Berkowitz is using a peanut butter sandwich to lure The Great Mutato out of the woods]
Scully: "Peanut butter sandwiches?"
Mulder: "You think baloney would be more effective?"


Garry Shandling/Mulder: "I love you, Scully. No ifs, ands or..."
Téa Leoni/Scully: "Bees." [They kiss] "Wait, wait, Mulder... I can't."
Garry Shandling/Mulder: "I know this feels wrong because we're friends and we treat each other as equals, but..."
Téa Leoni/Scully: "No, no, it's not that. It's not that."
Garry Shandling/Mulder: "Well, what then?"
Téa Leoni/Scully: "I'm in love with Assistant Director Walter Skinner."
Mulder: "That's it, Scully, I can't take it any more."
Scully: "Shh, Mulder, sit down."
Garry Shandling/Mulder: "What does he have that I don't have?"
Téa Leoni/Scully: "A bigger flashlight."



Oh and the quote in my siggy always gets me Just the ways he says it makes me laugh
No problem magic -- I'm glad that I made your day...

And thanks for posting the lines from Hollywood AD... gawd that ep was such a farce -- a funny one though ... gawd Téa was funny there. And so was everyone else...

And who could forget the line... 'It looks like Téa Leoni has a crush on you, Mulder...' -- I was like... sorry Téa -- but Mulder's taken ...

Do you mind if I add you to my friend's list?


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RIP Uncle Bob . 1933-2016 Thanks for everything and thanks for the memories. We love you and miss you.


RIP my older cat. I'll miss you, my wonderful furry friend. RIP Anthony Bourdain.

RIP Harry Anderson, aka: Judge Stone (Night Court). Thanks for the memories.

Sad about the upcoming closing of the forums, but I won't forget you guys, thanks for the memories!

Proud fan of the TV show, The X Files and proud shipper of Mulder and Scully!!

RIP Toys R' Us. Once a Toys R' Us Kid, always one.

Last edited by Fawkesfan1; July 7th, 2009 at 12:58 am.
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  #37  
Old July 7th, 2009, 3:24 am
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fawkesfan1 View Post
And who could forget the line... 'It looks like Téa Leoni has a crush on you, Mulder...' -- I was like... sorry Téa -- but Mulder's taken ...

Do you mind if I add you to my friend's list?
the bolded is hilarious if you know what they are refering to, I had to explain that to my brother

Sure, I would love to be added as your friend

Roseanne:

DJ: Darlene called me a prevert!
Roseanne: You're not a prevert honey, you're a pervert.

I love Roseanne

Roseanne: [their father has just died] Okay, that's it. I can't do it anymore, you call the rest of the family list.
Jackie: I can't call people, Roseanne!
Roseanne: Jackie... dial!
Jackie: I'm supposed to be in mourning.
Roseanne: Well then wear a veil over your face while you do it!
Jackie: [dials the phone] Hello, Auntie Barbara? It's Jackie... Jack-key! Yes. I'm fine... Fine!... I'm fine!... I got some bad news... Dad isn't with us anymore. I said Dad has passed away... He's passed away!... Dad is gone... Dad's dead!... He's dead!... No... DEAD!... DEAD! DEAD!... No, he's fine, he sends his love!
[hangs up]
Jackie: I am not doing that again, you can't make me!


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Last edited by magic_is_might; July 7th, 2009 at 3:31 am.
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  #38  
Old July 7th, 2009, 11:45 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Quote:
Originally Posted by magic_is_might View Post
the bolded is hilarious if you know what they are refering to, I had to explain that to my brother

Sure, I would love to be added as your friend

Roseanne:

DJ: Darlene called me a prevert!
Roseanne: You're not a prevert honey, you're a pervert.

I love Roseanne

Roseanne: [their father has just died] Okay, that's it. I can't do it anymore, you call the rest of the family list.
Jackie: I can't call people, Roseanne!
Roseanne: Jackie... dial!
Jackie: I'm supposed to be in mourning.
Roseanne: Well then wear a veil over your face while you do it!
Jackie: [dials the phone] Hello, Auntie Barbara? It's Jackie... Jack-key! Yes. I'm fine... Fine!... I'm fine!... I got some bad news... Dad isn't with us anymore. I said Dad has passed away... He's passed away!... Dad is gone... Dad's dead!... He's dead!... No... DEAD!... DEAD! DEAD!... No, he's fine, he sends his love!
[hangs up]
Jackie: I am not doing that again, you can't make me!
Yep so true there magic . Awesome .

@ the Roseanne lines. Man that show was funny at times.


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RIP Uncle Bob . 1933-2016 Thanks for everything and thanks for the memories. We love you and miss you.


RIP my older cat. I'll miss you, my wonderful furry friend. RIP Anthony Bourdain.

RIP Harry Anderson, aka: Judge Stone (Night Court). Thanks for the memories.

Sad about the upcoming closing of the forums, but I won't forget you guys, thanks for the memories!

Proud fan of the TV show, The X Files and proud shipper of Mulder and Scully!!

RIP Toys R' Us. Once a Toys R' Us Kid, always one.
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  #39  
Old July 8th, 2009, 2:16 pm
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Posts: 945
Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

The Office:
Michael Scott: Ladies and gentleman, I have some bad news. Meredith was hit by a car.


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  #40  
Old July 8th, 2009, 5:13 pm
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Re: Favorite TV Show Lines

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hysteria View Post

Janitor: You look unhappy. I like that.
(Scrubs)

Pretty much everything the Janitor says! Like "Knife-wrentch, for kids"

Dr. Cox: Oh, my God! I care so little, I almost passed out!



Supernatural !



(about Bela)
Dean: Can I shoot her?
Sam: Not in public

-----------

Sam Winchester: Dean, there's ten times as much lore about angels as there is about anything else we've ever hunted.
Dean Winchester: You know what, there's a ton of lore on unicorns too. In fact, I hear that they ride on silver moonbeams, and that they shoot rainbows out of their a**!
Sam Winchester: Wait, there's no such thing as unicorns?

-----------------

Dean: Ya' know she could be faking.
Sam: Yeah, what do you wanna do, poke her with a stick?
Dean: *nods*
Sam: Dude, you're not gonna poke her with a stick?

--------------------

Sam Winchester: Dude, I'm not enabling your sick habit. You're like one of those lab rats that pushes the pleasure button instead of the food button until it dies.
Dean Winchester: What are you talking about, I eat.


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