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Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS



 
 
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Old August 31st, 2007, 6:36 pm
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Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

This thread exists for the purpose of rewriting book scenes from Snape's point of view. It is a DH spoiler version of the Common Room thread, and I hope they can be merged eventually. (PTSS? Post Traumatic Severus Snape, of course!) I figure anyone who found HBP traumatic for Snape-related reasons, is probably also traumatized by DH...

You can rewrite your own scene from DH, or rewrite scenes from previous books based on the new knowledge you've gotten from DH, or write up any Snape scenes not actually appearing in the books.

It is not necessary to be on Snape's side.

I'll kick off with this "missing" scene from DH (I already posted this on F&B new Premises...but we need something to get us going!)

Return to Hogwarts

As the crushing sensation of Apparition ceased abruptly, Severus Snape found himself on the road, not far from the great, wrought-iron gates of Hogwarts School. A brief memory of his last passage of the gates returned to him, pursued by Hagrid’s hippogriff, Potter beside himself with hatred, and accusations of murder.

They waited for him, that hatred and those accusations, inside the castle, he reflected darkly. Ruthlessly he shoved the thought aside and approached the entrance. He knew he needed them, and he would find, must find, a way to use them despite their hatred of him.

The tall pillars, topped by statues of winged boars, flanked the gates as they always had, and Snape saw that the chains, installed as security precautions in the previous year, still bound them shut. Drawing his wand, he tapped the padlock once, nonverbally casting the secret incantation the previous Headmaster had entrusted to him. In response to his spell, the chains snaked backwards and the gate swung slowly open.

There was no further need, now, for these precautions, Snape reflected. The enemy was about to enter the school, victorious, with the authority of the Ministry at its back. With a flick of his wand, he Vanished the chains, then muttered a series of incantations that lifted the remaining Anti-Intruder jinxes. It would’ve had to be done at some point, he rationalized. But he knew, also, that he could have delegated the task to anyone, and left it for later. The truth was that he dreaded what awaited him, and would gladly have found yet another reason to delay stepping through those gates and taking possession of his new authority.

He faced the now open gates, knowing that it was too late for hesitation and regrets. For a moment, his right hand sought the reassurance of the torn bit of paper he carried inside his robes, over his heart. Then, squaring his shoulders, he strode through the gate.

The grounds, brightly lit by the early morning sunshine, were deserted. It was one reason he had picked that time to arrive. Hagrid would still be safely in bed. Were he to encounter Hagrid before cooler heads had time to speak with him, Snape did not doubt he would find himself forced first to defend himself, and then, at the very least, to sack him. If he was to have any hope of keeping his commitment to Dumbledore, he needed all of the current teachers to stay, for as long as he could arrange to keep them there.

Indeed, no one stirred as he neared Hagrid’s hut. It had been repaired after the fire his fellow Death Eaters has set, back in June, he could see. The new timbers and slats had not yet weathered to match the portions of the cabin that had remained intact. He passed by it and soon approached the great wooden doors of the castle itself.

Snape opened the doors to find Argus Filch sweeping the wide marble staircase across the Entrance Hall. Filch looked up, and the broom he had been holding clattered down the stairs.

“Good morning, Mr. Filch,” Snape said calmly, while crossing the Entrance Hall.

“P-professor Snape?” Filch stammered fearfully.

“It seems you have heard the tale some are passing around, that I murdered the previous Headmaster,” Snape said, stepping over the fallen broom and onto the first stair.
“Rumors can be so unreliable, Mr. Filch.”

Filch peered at him suspiciously. Mrs. Norris, who had run to her owner after being startled by the broom’s fall, twined herself around his legs, apparently infected by his doubts.

“Indeed, far from lending any credence to such stories, the Ministry and Board of Governors have appointed me Headmaster in Dumbledore’s place,” he added as he walked up to the caretaker, producing his letter of appointment, properly signed and sealed, for Filch’s inspection.

Filch straightened, and a fawning smile crossed his lips.

“I am pleased to hear it, sir,” he said.

“Thank you, Mr. Filch,” Snape replied. “Could you oblige me with a small favor?”

“Certainly, Headmaster,” Filch replied.

“I would like to speak to Professor McGonagall. Could you ask her to stop by my office directly after breakfast?”

“Certainly, Professor, I will tell her,” Filch replied.

“Thank you, Mr. Filch,” Snape said. Filch headed down to get his broom and Snape headed up to the Headmaster’s office. His office now, he reminded himself.

The stone gargoyle stood as it always had, in front of the hidden entrance to the office.

“Toffee éclairs,” he said to it, and it moved aside, revealing the spiral staircase that led to the office door. He would attend to the selection of a more suitable password, more palatable to his newest colleagues, after his talk with Minerva.

Snape stepped onto the bottom stair and it rose, taking him up to the familiar wooden door and bronze doorknocker. He placed his hand on the knob and turned it. As the door opened and he passed through it, a familiar voice greeted him.

“Severus!” it said, and he looked up at the newest, gold-framed portrait, which hung on the wall behind the massive desk.

Albus Dumbledore was beaming down at him.

“Dumbledore,” Snape said.

“I hear you are confirmed in your new post,” the portrait said. “Excellent work, Severus!”

Naturally, he would know immediately. Some of the office’s denizens had portraits at the Ministry.

“I am,” Snape confirmed curtly.

“So you played your part well, during the raid?” Dumbledore asked.

He was reminded of Dumbledore’s words at their previous meeting. If you are forced to take part in the raid, be sure to act your part convincingly…. At least this time Albus had not asked him to kill anyone….

“I cut off the ear of George Weasley, I am told,” Snape said. With a shrug of his shoulders, he added, “Apparently, that was sufficiently convincing.”

Dumbledore’s blue eyes regarded him intently. Snape looked back, his expression unreadable. He had given the old man what he wanted, if only by accident. If Dumbledore wanted a further explanation, he could ask for it.

“And the Carrows?” Dumbledore asked, returning to the matter at hand.

“As we expected,” Snape replied.

“What of the other teachers?” Dumbledore asked, a note of concern creeping into his voice.

“The Dark Lord agreed with me that wholesale replacement of the staff would needlessly disrupt the magical education of our students. He has accepted my assurances that I can keep any troublemakers in line,” Snape explained.

“Well done!” Dumbledore exclaimed. “But…can you? If I can help-”

“I expect Professor McGonagall here shortly,” Snape interrupted. “I believe that interview will proceed more smoothly if you are absent.”

“As you wish, Severus,” Dumbledore agreed. “Until later, then.”

“Good day,” Snape said, just as the figure of Dumbledore disappeared out of the side of his portrait.

Snape stepped around the massive desk, pulled out the chair, and sat down in it for the first time. The surface of the desk was empty, except for a silver ink pot and quill. Snape laid his wand down beside it and leaned back in the chair for a moment, his eyes closed. One last time, he ran over what he planned to say. It was quite simple, really. As to his fears – if he could stand to watch the naked desperation in Charity Burbage’s face in the moments before she died, surely the hate and contempt he was sure to see in Minerva’s eyes would not prove too much. The stakes were too high.

Thus resolved, Snape summoned a House Elf and arranged delivery of some tea and toast. He was still drinking the tea when he head a firm knock on the office door.

Glancing at his watch, he realized it must be Professor McGonagall, punctual as always. Setting his teacup down on the tray, he rose and walked to the door. McGonagall stood beyond, her back ramrod-straight, her expression disapproving.

“Murderer!” she exclaimed, her voice heavy with disgust.

With a slightly mocking smile and courteous nod of his head, swept his arm to indicate his guest should step inside.

“Minerva!” he said. “Do come in.”

She regarded him through her glasses for a moment, and her blue eyes flashed.

“Snape,” she finally forced out the greeting, and stepped inside.

Severus shut the door behind her and turned back to his guest. Her eyes, she saw, had been drawn to the empty portrait that hung over his desk.

“I’m afraid Albus will not be joining us today,” Snape commented, in response to her unspoken question. He swept around the massive desk, his black robe billowing behind him, and faced her from behind it. “Please, won’t you have a seat?”

He could see in her eyes that she considered refusing, and her lips parted, then snapped shut firmly. She sat down in the visitor’s chair, and Severus seated himself as well.

“You want my resignation, I am sure,” McGonagall said in a clipped voice. “You have it. I have nothing further to say to you.”

“You have served the school long and ably as Deputy Headmistress and Head of Gryffindor,” Snape said. “I thought to offer you the possibility to continue.”

She glared back at him.

“Along with the Headship, the Da-… the Ministry has given me considerably leeway in staffing the school to meet its new objectives,” he stated. “I have the authority to retain you, if we reach an understanding.”

“New objectives?” McGonagall asked, not entirely managing to conceal her indignation.
“It shames me to know that you even considered making me such an offer,” she continued, her voice rising.

“You know what they say, everyone has her price,” Snape replied with a sneer.

“And this” she waved her arm about heatedly, indicating the room in which they sat, “this was yours! Albus took you in and gave you a new start in life, and you repaid his trust by killing him!”

Words truer than she knew, Snape reflected. And it was his duty to make sure that she remained in ignorance of the truth she had just spoken….

“I do hope that is not your final word,” Snape replied calmly, leaning back in his chair. “Madam Lestrange has expressed some interest in the position herself. While the … Ministry appreciates her enthusiasm, frankly I do not believe she has the temperament to make a good administrator.”

“Bellatrix Lestrange?! She can’t – you wouldn’t – she was not even a Gryffindor!” McGonagall protested, shock and anger rendering her, for the moment, incoherent.

“True, I would have to bend the rules to put her in charge of Gryffindor House,” Snape said with a shrug. “But I am afraid you leave me no other choice. Perhaps it is better than way. She was certainly looking forward to a reunion with certain of your students…you are saving me the trouble of talking her out of it.”

The blood had drained out of Minerva’s face as he spoke.

“Please … perhaps … I spoke too hastily,” she said pleadingly. “I will do it, on one condition.”

Just as he had known – for her students, she would swallow her pride. Snape raised an eyebrow and looked at her mockingly.

“You are in no position to dictate terms, Minerva,” he replied coldly.

“As Head of Gryffindor, I would retain the power to discipline the students in my House?” she asked.

“So long as you keep your Gryffindor brats out of my hair, assuredly,” he said. “That’s no condition, that’s my pleasure.”

“I will do it,” she said. He fixed her with a cold stare. “Headmaster,” she spat out.

“Thank you, Minerva. I am glad to see we that understand one another. Well, as you have seen reason, I have a few organizational matters for you to attend to before the start of term.”

“Yes?” she asked.

“First, Muggle Studies. I regret to inform you that Professor Burbage has resigned.”

“Resigned?!” Minerva exclaimed. “Charity?”

“Quite irrevocably, I fear,” Snape said coldly. “You will arrange for her belongings to be returned to her next of kin-”

McGonagall gasped and covered her mouth with a hand.

“-so that the new Muggle Studies professor may occupy her quarters,” Snape finished.

“He Who Must Not be Named will permit Muggle Studies to be taught?” McGonagall asked, surprised.

“The Ministry has decided on a change of focus, naturally. I have retained Alecto Carrow to teach the class,” Snape explained.

Minerva shot daggers out of her eyes, but kept silent.

“We are also short an instructor for Dark Arts. Amycus Carrow will be taking over for me in that capacity,” Snape added. “I expect them both shortly before the Welcoming Feast on Sunday.”

“Will that be all?” she asked.

“If you would be so good as to let Professors Sprout, Slughorn, and Flitwick know that I am extending them the same offer as I have extended to you, I would appreciate it,” Snape said.

“Not willing to face Filius, are you? A curse in the back is more your style!” Minerva spat out.

“I would not expect a Gryffindor to recognize good tactics when she sees them,” Snape replied calmly.

“Tactics? A pretty word for treason and cowardice!” she exclaimed.

“You’ve had enough time to get used to the new reality, I think, Professor,” Snape said flatly. “Our new teachers are likely to misunderstand a bit of sparring between old colleagues. It will cease, now.”

Minerva fell silent, and took a couple of deep breaths

“What will you be telling them?” she asked in a moment.

“The truth, naturally. I made a threat, and you caved in to it. Just a matter of knowing the right lever,” Snape replied sardonically.

“I see,” she said coldly, her eyes burning in the frozen mask that was her face. “Will that be all, then, Headmaster?”

“For now, Professor McGonagall,” he answered.

She rose and left without another word.

The interview had gone exactly as he had planned. A resounding success. He drew the torn photograph out and looked at it for a moment, a single tear running down his face, before tucking it away carefully in its place.


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  #2  
Old August 31st, 2007, 9:46 pm
mrchee  Male.gif mrchee is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

9.5/10

Is there more?


  #3  
Old August 31st, 2007, 10:36 pm
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Cute Idea Z...you are a very good writer, I was engrossed as I read. I think the narrative indicating Snape's "true" feelings and purposes is a great way to share thoughts on the post writer's impressions of Snape's character, motives and behavior. Good job.


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Old September 2nd, 2007, 2:23 am
Alorra Spinnet  Female.gif Alorra Spinnet is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Yeah, Snape's P.O.V. is back.
I have always enjoyed most of the talent with the previous versions of this thread.


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  #5  
Old September 2nd, 2007, 2:39 am
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Keep that going! you do write very good


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Old September 2nd, 2007, 6:55 am
ginny8dandelion  Female.gif ginny8dandelion is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Yes! Snape's POV is back! I love these threads.


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Old September 2nd, 2007, 12:28 pm
true_heir_of_slyth  Female.gif true_heir_of_slyth is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Huzzah for the return of Snape's PoV! And smashing working, zgirnius

Here's my offering ... also already available in F&B, but I had initially written it with the intention of posting it here, so... Snape adjusts to life as a portrait

* * *

Hanging Around


‘… it is considered rather an honour, you know, Severus.’

‘Hmm.’

‘Some might say the highest honour.’ Severus glanced around from behind the glass of his frame at the assortment of senile, medievally-minded, dangerous, or simply stark raving mad witches and wizards who sat, slept, talked nonsense and drooled, in some cases all at once, in their portraits on the walls of the Headmaster’s Office.

‘Mmm,’ he managed. He sat back in his chair. The artist, he had to grudgingly admit, had done a fairly good job on the upholstery, and had at least had the foresight to draw in a few comfy cushions. He felt he had gone rather overboard on the Slytherin green banners and drapes, though, which seemed to cover every spare inch of canvas. His shoes pinched his feet and were far too pointy, and his robes could at best be described as impractical for potion brewing. In the portrait next to him, Dumbledore popped a sherbet lemon into his mouth. Severus felt certain he had never been painted with the sweets. Even as a portrait, Dumbledore managed somehow to bend the rules.

‘Argus performs any running repairs, should the need arise,’ continued Dumbledore, apparently having finished his sweet. Severus snorted.

‘I can think of no possible situation where the sight of Argus Filch coming towards me with a paintbrush would be a pleasant one.’

‘Oh, it’s really not so bad. But when he tells you to hold still, I would advise you to do so.’ Severus sighed.

‘What are we expected to do here?’ he enquired.

‘Do?’ repeated Dumbledore. ‘Nothing much. A reward for many years of loyal service to the school. Consider this a sort of retirement.’

‘PIDGEONS!’ roared the wizard in the portrait above Severus for no apparent reason.

‘So we just … hang around here?’ said Severus, desperate now.

‘Was that a pun, Severus?’

‘Certainly not.’

‘It should have been. Dear me, is that the time? I promised poor Englebert a visit. He’s dreadfully lonely now that Griselda has been removed for cleaning … excuse me, Severus…’ Each of the portraits in the office was connected by a system of what could best be described as corridors: it was down one of these Dumbledore now walked, through Severus’ own portrait, squeezing past the armchair and out the other side. Severus had already realised that due to its position just to the left of the Headmaster’s chair, his portrait was ideally located as a thoroughfare to more or less anywhere in the office. The incessant trudging backwards and forwards of faces from Hogwarts, A History was already starting to grate on his nerves. He slumped back in his chair, despondent.

‘Psst. Severus. Psst. Severus. Severus. Pssssssssssssst!’ Severus looked up. A figure in the portrait directly opposite his was waving at him, clearly trying to get his attention. Severus held up a hand in acknowledgement. This did not seem to satisfy Phineas Nigellus, who began to wave with a new fervour.

‘What?’ Severus called. He had no fear of waking the portraits around him: most of them were so deaf that even the battle of Hogwarts had nearly passed them by without notice.

‘Get over here, you fool!’ snapped Phineas, with an equal disregard for his neighbours. Puzzled, but glad to have something to do at last, Severus got to his feet and made his way slowly across to Phineas Nigelus’ portrait, his progress hampered by the fact that he got lost and twice ended up in a portrait of a wizard wearing a ruff so enormous that he had hold his own head up.

‘About time, too,’ said Phineas in greeting, as Severus finally made it into the right frame. ‘Pull up a chair.’ Severus sat down, and Phineas rummaged around underneath his own chair.

‘Aha!’ he cried, having found what he was looking for at last. He pulled out a large bottle of Firewhiskey and a pack of cards. Disappearing for a moment into the adjacent portrait, he returned with a pair of solid gold goblets.

‘I’ve been waiting years for someone who’ll give me a decent game of poker,’ he muttered, pouring out a generous helping of the drink and handing it to Severus. ‘Cheers,’ he added, holding up his own goblet.

Severus grinned and took a long draught of Firewhiskey. Perhaps life on canvas wouldn’t be so bad after all…


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Old September 2nd, 2007, 12:28 pm
Kadaj010  Undisclosed.gif Kadaj010 is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Quote:
Originally Posted by zgirnius View Post
This thread exists for the purpose of rewriting book scenes from Snape's point of view. It is a DH spoiler version of the Common Room thread, and I hope they can be merged eventually. (PTSS? Post Traumatic Severus Snape, of course!) I figure anyone who found HBP traumatic for Snape-related reasons, is probably also traumatized by DH...

You can rewrite your own scene from DH, or rewrite scenes from previous books based on the new knowledge you've gotten from DH, or write up any Snape scenes not actually appearing in the books.

It is not necessary to be on Snape's side.

I'll kick off with this "missing" scene from DH (I already posted this on F&B new Premises...but we need something to get us going!)
Wonderful Idea. Yet so depressing...*sigh*


  #9  
Old September 2nd, 2007, 3:30 pm
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Quote:
Originally Posted by mrchee View Post
9.5/10 Is there more?
Thanks! Not at present, though I am thinking of perpetrating a longer HBP/DH fanfic about Snape at some point. If I do, I would likely post the first chapter here as well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wickedwickedboy View Post
Cute Idea Z...you are a very good writer, I was engrossed as I read. I think the narrative indicating Snape's "true" feelings and purposes is a great way to share thoughts on the post writer's impressions of Snape's character, motives and behavior. Good job.
Thanks. I agree, writing this sort of story is a great way to get across ideas about the characters. It was also a good way to test out a theory, when we were still guessing at a lot of the facts - does it work in a story?

Quote:
Originally Posted by LudwigVan View Post
Keep that going! you do write very good
I am pleased you liked it! This was my immediate reaction to reading DH, so I did not plan to make it part of anything longer, it was just something I had to get off my chest.

Quote:
Originally Posted by true_heir_of_slyth View Post
Huzzah for the return of Snape's PoV! And smashing working, zgirnius
Thanks! I loved the ending of yours. Though really, I should think it would be a threesome - Albus ought to be good at poker too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kadaj010 View Post
Wonderful Idea. Yet so depressing...*sigh*
Fortunately some of us seem to be able to see the bright side...Maybe we'll see more stories like true_heir_of_slyth's!


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  #10  
Old September 2nd, 2007, 4:58 pm
true_heir_of_slyth  Female.gif true_heir_of_slyth is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Quote:
Originally Posted by zgirnius
Fortunately some of us seem to be able to see the bright side...
Writing Comic!Snape is certainly easier with the weight that lifted with DH... Thanks zgirnius, glad you liked it - I get the impression though that Phineas would have tried playing poker with Dumbles before, and found himself losing without really understanding how...


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  #11  
Old September 2nd, 2007, 9:41 pm
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Glad to see a post-DH version of this thread. Great POVs, Zg and true_heir! ^^


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  #12  
Old September 2nd, 2007, 9:45 pm
ginny8dandelion  Female.gif ginny8dandelion is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

true_heir_of_slyth:

I have to say that your peice was quite funny, especially the part when the random protrait cries "Pigeon!" I totally burst into laughter.


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  #13  
Old September 2nd, 2007, 10:22 pm
true_heir_of_slyth  Female.gif true_heir_of_slyth is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Thanks very much, ignisia and ginny8dandelion! Glad you both liked it The ending of DH didn't give me the closure on Snape that I so badly wanted ... I felt the guy needed at least a semi-happy ending, complete with firewhiskey and card games

I'm also working on another one-shot, involving Sev, assorted Death Eaters, and the Dark Lord's surprise birthday party. Needless to say, it's full of angst, rage and cake.

Well ... cake, at least. One out of three ain't bad

Slythy


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  #14  
Old September 3rd, 2007, 5:10 am
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Quote:
Originally Posted by zgirnius View Post
Thanks. I agree, writing this sort of story is a great way to get across ideas about the characters. It was also a good way to test out a theory, when we were still guessing at a lot of the facts - does it work in a story?
Well I of course would not see Snape thinking the same way myself, but that is because I have a different take on his character and how he thought - so some of Snape's thoughts as written here don't seem plausible too me in light of canon. However, with respect to seeing it through Snape's eyes as you saw it, the idea works beautifully in a story. I put aside my personal thoughts and feelings and just read it from a literary point of view and found it an engrossing tale of how you thought it may have been (not feeling I have to agree or disagree with it) - from that viewpoint I enjoyed it immensely.


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  #15  
Old September 3rd, 2007, 8:56 pm
true_heir_of_slyth  Female.gif true_heir_of_slyth is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

^^ That's the beauty of this thread. Doesn't matter what you think of the Sevster, you're welcome all the same

Just to keep the thread ticking over, here's my next offering. It's quite a bit longer than the last one, hope no-one minds. It also partly continues in the theme of the headmasters' portraits, something that's proving a bit of an obsession for me Anyhoo, here we go: Snape very nearly blows his cover when he forgets the most important event in the Death Eaters’ calendar…

* * *

Happy Birthday, Lord Voldemort!

‘Severus. Severus. Severus.. Severus, wake up.’

It was with ill grace that Snape opened his eyes and turned around to face the portrait that had been his only company for the past few months. He had taken to sleeping in the rather uncomfortable chair in the Headmaster’s Office, after discovering in spectacular fashion that the DA had booby-trapped his chambers.

‘What?’ he said blearily. This was not the first time that Dumbledore had chosen to wake him at some ridiculous hour of the morning. ‘Are you caught in a draft again? Does your frame need polishing? Have your sherbet lemons melted?’ The other portraits around the office grinned and leaned in closer to listen to what would undoubtedly be another enjoyable spat between the two.

‘No, Severus,’ replied Dumbledore patiently. ‘Have you forgotten what day it is?’ Snape shrugged and curled back up in his chair, shifting to try and find a marginally less uncomfortable position.

‘Whatever day it is, it’s only just started,’ he mumbled, falling asleep again. ‘Can’t it wait…?’

‘No, Severus, it cannot!’ cried Dumbledore.

‘I’m going to put a towel over you again if you insist on carrying on with this conversation.’

‘Severus, think! What day is it?’ Snape gave up, and sat up sulkily.

‘Monday?’ he said sarcastically. ‘The day I have to remind Hagrid to clean out the Nifflers? Is it time to renew my Daily Prophet subscription? Do I have a book due back at the library?’

‘It is all of these things, and more,’ said Dumbledore cryptically. Snape groaned and pulled his cloak back over his head.

‘It’s too early for guess-the-day, Dumbledore. I’m going to sleep on it, and I’ll let you know at a time that actually qualifies as morning…’

‘Severus!’ said Dumbledore sharply. ‘It is Lord Voldemort’s birthday!’ Snape sat bolt upright, his face pale. Dumbledore looked smug.

‘I told you it couldn’t wait,’ he said simply.

‘What am I going to do?’ gibbered Snape, kneeling and peering over the back of the Headmaster’s throne at Dumbledore, who shrugged unhelpfully.

‘Under normal circumstances I would suggest a bunch of flowers and a bottle of Ogden’s best Firewhiskey, but I hardly think that would be suitable for a celebration of the Dark Lord’s birth…’

Dumbledore’s next words were muffled by the towel that Snape had hung over the frame of his portrait.

After a few hours of quick potion making, Snape had brewed a vial of a tonic of his own invention, which protected and added a healthy lustre to snake scales. After a moment’s thought he added a green ribbon around the neck of the vial, feeling that it would be just as well to do the thing properly. He straightened out the worst of the creases in his robes, but as even the House Elves had been unable to retrieve anything from his wardrobe after the DA had finished with it he would have to make do.

‘I’m going,’ he announced to Dumbledore’s portrait, still covered in the towel. ‘I’ll take that off when I get back. And if I don’t get back, it will be your fault for being so unhelpful, and you’ll have to look at the backside of that towel forever.’

‘You know, Severus, you really are very childish sometimes,’ said Dumbledore, who had in fact taken refuge in the portrait of Phineas Nigellus, with whom he was currently engrossed in a game of cards. Snape ignored him and swept from the office in what he hoped was a suitably dramatic fashion.

There were no signs of life from within Malfoy Manor as Snape approached. He neatly sidestepped a pile of peacock dung and trotted up the steps to the front door, which swung inwards of its own accord.

Snape turned the bronze handle to the Death Eaters’ meeting room, glad that he had arrived so early, and planning to bag himself the best seat at the table—

‘HAPPY BIRTHD—‘ someone began to shout enthusiastically.

‘It’s not him, you idiot!’ snarled Bellatrix, slapping Pettigrew around the back of the head. ‘It’s just Snape!’

What,’ said Snape, picking off the green and silver streamers now covering his shoulders and brushing glitter out of his hair, ‘do you think you are doing?’

‘We are holding a surprise birthday party in honour of the Dark Lord,’ said Bellatrix proudly.

‘And I wasn’t invited?’

‘It was intended to be for the Dark Lord’s most trusted and faithful associates—‘

‘Pettigrew got an invitation and I didn’t?!’ cried Snape, incredulous.

‘I’m sure yours just got lost in the post, Severus…’ squeaked Pettigrew, trying to diffuse the situation. Snape shot him a filthy look.

‘So,’ he said, mastering himself. ‘Your plan is to cover the Dark Lord with glitter as soon as he steps through the door?’

‘Yes,’ said Bellatrix, pleased.

‘The only problem,’ said Lucius, eying the glittery mess on his carpet with distaste, ‘is that with all the secrecy involved in the Dark Lord’s plans, none of us can be certain of when he will actually show up. Pettigrew is compensating for this by covering everyone who walks through the door with glitter.’

‘So I see,’ said Snape. He noted that someone, most probably Bellatrix, had taken the time to bake a large cake in the shape of a skull, and had decorated its eye sockets with green, spluttering candles. There was a small pile of presents next to it. Snape placed his own offering among them, and took a seat with the assembled guests. Bellatrix looked sulky as he helped himself to a cauldron cake.

It seemed to take an age for the Dark Lord to arrive – the Death Eaters never being entirely comfortable in each other’s presence anyway, little conversation passed between them – but at last, soft footsteps just beyond the door confirmed his approach.

‘SURPRISE!’ yelled the Death Eaters as the door opened. Lord Voldemort disappeared behind a mist of glitter and streamers.

‘Argh!’ he yelped, as if he had just been stunned. He emerged, choking and sparkly, and looking furious.

‘What is this?’ he shrieked. ‘Mutiny! Mutiny!’

‘No, my Lord…’ cried Bellatrix, running forward and grasping his hand. ‘We merely wanted to wish you a happy birthday—‘

‘Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you,’ began Pettigrew, taking this to be his cue to start singing. He trailed off under Bellatrix’s furious glare. There was an excruciatingly long pause. Then—

‘Birthday?’ said the Dark Lord thoughtfully.

‘Yes, my Lord,’ said Bellatrix eagerly, clearly glad that he appeared to be getting to grips with the idea.

‘Yes…’ Voldemort looked around at the assembled Death Eaters, and then his gaze fell upon the pile of presents. His expression turned immediately into one of greed. ‘Yes! You may celebrate. You must celebrate!’

‘Yes, my Lord!’ Bellatrix almost shrieked, and, spinning around to face the door, she clicked her fingers. Severus did well not to allow his jaw to drop as the Weird Sisters, pale, haggard and manacled together in a bizarre sort of chain gang, but apparently otherwise fine, trooped into the room, instruments bobbing along by their side, borne by a group of house elves.

‘Good morning, er … Death Eaters!’ growled the lead singer, looking somewhat unnerved by the stony faces looking up at him. ‘Is everybody … ready to party?’ You could have heard a speck of glitter drop in the silence that followed.

‘Yes,’ affirmed Lord Voldemort at last.

‘Er … um … right. Rock on!’ stammered the singer feebly. He gestured wildly to the drummer, who, clearly terrified, grabbed his sticks and hit out a shaky rhythm.

‘A-one, a-two, a-one-two-three—‘

The Death Eaters, taking their cue from the Dark Lord, remained standing perfectly still as a series of crashing chords echoed through the dining room. Judging by the way the band was sweating, this was proving the toughest gig of their careers.

‘There will be dancing,’ said Lord Voldemort, as the second chorus rang out.

‘But – my lord … this is antique oak flooring—‘ pleaded Lucius uselessly.

Dance!’ cried Voldemort.

Severus groaned and got to his feet. It was going to be like the Halloween party all over again…


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  #16  
Old September 4th, 2007, 3:32 am
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

I really liked it! These parts made me :

Quote:
‘I’m going to put a towel over you again if you insist on carrying on with this conversation.’
Quote:
‘HAPPY BIRTHD—‘ someone began to shout enthusiastically.

‘It’s not him, you idiot!’ snarled Bellatrix, slapping Pettigrew around the back of the head. ‘It’s just Snape!’
I can just see little Peter doing that.

Quote:
‘Pettigrew got an invitation and I didn’t?!’ cried Snape, incredulous.
Quote:
‘Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you,’ began Pettigrew, taking this to be his cue to start singing. He trailed off under Bellatrix’s furious glare. There was an excruciatingly long pause. Then—
Poor Pettigrew.

Quote:
‘Yes, my Lord!’ Bellatrix almost shrieked, and, spinning around to face the door, she clicked her fingers. Severus did well not to allow his jaw to drop as the Weird Sisters, pale, haggard and manacled together in a bizarre sort of chain gang, but apparently otherwise fine, trooped into the room, instruments bobbing along by their side, borne by a group of house elves.


Quote:
‘Dance!’ cried Voldemort.


That's probably the funniest thing I've ever read! You are an awesome writer and I hope you publish more stories!


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Last edited by witchsmart; September 4th, 2007 at 5:36 am.
  #17  
Old September 4th, 2007, 12:10 pm
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Quote:
Originally Posted by witchsmart
That's probably the funniest thing I've ever read! You are an awesome writer and I hope you publish more stories!
Thank you witchsmart! Very glad you enjoyed it I'm always writing bits and pieces ... there's a link to my latest effort in my sig, if you're interested [/shamelessplug]


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  #18  
Old September 4th, 2007, 12:21 pm
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Good thing Snape's students never found out he almost missed an upcoming assignment. Maybe he should have stayed up the night before finishing it.

So, Dumbledore just "hikes" off to another portrait, when Snape covers him up, I wonder how many towels Snape keeps handy?


  #19  
Old September 4th, 2007, 9:27 pm
true_heir_of_slyth  Female.gif true_heir_of_slyth is offline
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

Quote:
Originally Posted by BublGumPnkHar
So, Dumbledore just "hikes" off to another portrait, when Snape covers him up, I wonder how many towels Snape keeps handy?
A fair few, I'd say ... I'd imagine Dumbles has quite a knack for reappearing just when Snape thought he'd got rid of him


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  #20  
Old September 4th, 2007, 9:48 pm
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Re: Snape's Point of View: Deathly Hallows PTSS

These are hilarious!


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