Preparing your child(ren) for a new baby

[LBuccalo]

What were some tips you did to prepare your child for the new baby?
Did they work?

Well as soon as I started showing with my second I let his big brother know I was growing a baby. He was very involved and I let him in on most things that were happening. I took him to the ultrasound where he could see the baby (he thought it was a robot baby) and he talked to the baby all the time. I signed him up for a sibling class but unfortunately there wasn't enough people signed up to actually have a class. I mostly talked to him about what it would be like to be a big brother and things the baby would do and then things he did when he was a baby. And for the most part it worked really well. He was so excited when I had the baby (he was happy the "watermelon" came out)

What were the age differences between the children?

My kids are almost exactly 4 years apart

How did your child(ren) adjust to the new baby?

He did really good. There hasn't been any jealousy, he thinks his brother is so funny. There has definitely been indifference but he has not been mean at all. He even shares some of his bigger toys with his little brother.

Any funny/sweet/sad stories to share?

My little one, Will, is obsessed with his older brother, Craig, and one of the first voices (besides mine) he recognized was his brother and everytime Craig talks around Will, Will starts smiling and laughing. He thinks his big brother is the stuff.

Would have done anything differently in preparing your child(ren)?

Seeing how well this has turned out definitely not. I mean maybe if there was a sibling class but I could handle it if there wasn't.

[Desraelda]

There are five years difference between my daughters. I took my daughter to the hospital with me a few weeks before the baby was born. We had lunch in the cafeteria and I explained to her that I would be away for a few days and would be bringing a baby home. I let her ask whatever questions she had.

She was staying at my parents house when her sister was born. She woke up at the exact time I gave birth calling for me. The next morning, when they told her she had a baby sister she said, "Okay, can I have a jelly doughnut?" So in her world, jelly doughnuts were more important than a new sister.

When I brought the baby home, we picked up my daughter at the day care. I gave the baby to her father to hold and held out my arms to my daughter. She slipped right past me, totally uninterested in me, and only wanted to see the baby. So much for following the book recommendations.

[LoveWeasleys]

Okay I am reawaking this thread since I just found out I am Preggers!!
YAYAY

Over the next several months I am hoping this thread comes in handy as I have a 16 month-old that will need to get prepared for the new baby. She absolutely ADORES babies right now and thinks it is funny when the cry. But she isn't around them much and I have a feeling that is one reason she likes them, because they are new to her. However, when we bring Baby #2 home and the baby is around all the time and not going away I have a feeling she will feel a little differently.

I am also a stay at home mom so she is used to getting undivided attention. I plan over the next months to get some books to read to her about a new baby and she is getting a baby doll for Christmas so we will work together how to take care of it and such.

Any other ideas/stories that worked or didn't work?

[LBuccalo]

Originally Posted by LOVEWEASLEYS04

I am also a stay at home mom so she is used to getting undivided attention. I plan over the next months to get some books to read to her about a new baby and she is getting a baby doll for Christmas so we will work together how to take care of it and such.

Any other ideas/stories that worked or didn't work?

I was a stay at home mom with my first and so he was pretty spoiled with my attention. I always made sure that if I wasn't feeling well I would say it was because I was tired and leave the pregnancy out of it. I only shared the happy stuff with him and blamed all the bad stuff on myself. I tried to only talk abou the positive things the baby would bring and I made very clear that the baby would not be taking any toys away.

Once the baby was born I made a huge effort to give equal time. If people came over to see the baby I made the most of it and made them play with the baby while I spent some one on one time with my other son. It was hard because I am a single mom so I am the only one giving the attention, but it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. We all just kind of adapted to the new situation and luckily my oldest son was very accepting and not at all jealous.

[beth83]

Dylan has adapted to Jacob really well. He loves 'his baby' and loved showing him off to all his teachers at school.

I think the key is talk to the older child the whole way through the nine months. If possible take them to scans but I would leave them at home for any appointments that would involve taking blood or any other invasive procedure I would imagine that a small child would get upset.

Once Jacob and I got home from the hospital we got Dylan involved in everything from nappy changing to bathing, just by saying 'could you pass me the wipes' makes them feel involved.

Dylan loves to helps us wind after a feed, although I can't decided if its a covert way to hit his baby brother

[LBuccalo]

Originally Posted by beth83

I think the key is talk to the older child the whole way through the nine months. If possible take them to scans but I would leave them at home for any appointments that would involve taking blood or any other invasive procedure I would imagine that a small child would get upset.

Once Jacob and I got home from the hospital we got Dylan involved in everything from nappy changing to bathing, just by saying 'could you pass me the wipes' makes them feel involved.

You are so right. Talking to your older children about the enitre process and keeping them involved is important. My son Craig has done so well. He has his moments when he trys to get away from Will but that usually only happens when Craig is playing Legos. He is a very proud big brohter who insists that I bring baby Will to school when I pick Craig up.

Craig feels like he has had a big hand in helping Will grow up. He is always saying stuff like "Will is learning from my brain Mom" which is funny. There really isn't alot of jealousy or animosity, I guess I am pretty lucky

[mexicant]

Originally Posted by beth83

I think the key is talk to the older child the whole way through the nine months. If possible take them to scans but I would leave them at home for any appointments that would involve taking blood or any other invasive procedure I would imagine that a small child would get upset.

You know, Evs (my older one) was with me when I took a three hour GD test, and after each time they took blood he told me, "Good job, Mommy!" I guess it just depends on the kid, eh?

[LoveWeasleys]

So, I am due in about three months and my 21 month year old daughter is just starting to get the concept of a new baby.

First off she adores babies, so that is a plus. We just transitioned her to a "Big Girl Bed" so I don't have to worry about doing that and taking care of an infant.

I am also trying to find some good "Big Sister" or "New Baby" books to read with her. If anyone knows any, I would love some recomendations.

We are encouraging her to play with baby dolls, showing her how to hold them and be nice with a baby. Now if I can just get her to stop biting the baby doll's ears and dropping her on her head

[beth83]

Originally Posted by LOVEWEASLEYS04

We are encouraging her to play with baby dolls, showing her how to hold them and be nice with a baby. Now if I can just get her to stop biting the baby doll's ears and dropping her on her head

I have heart failure nearly everyday as Dylan tries to pick up Jacob. Personally I found that allowing Dylan to have regular cuddles on the sofa has sort of solved this but I don't think he's going to stop trying to pick him up.

When my sister was born my auntie brought my 'My Naughty Little Sister' by Shirley Hughes. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_gw...sister&x=0&y=0 I loved them and still have the book now, they probably are a bit 'dated' but they are lovely stories.

I'm not sure if you can get on DVD but there is an episode of The Bear in the Big Blue House about becoming a older sibling which we found helped, I think it was a boy becoming the older sibling but the baby turned out to be a girl so it might help.

[LoveWeasleys]

Originally Posted by beth83

I have heart failure nearly everyday as Dylan tries to pick up Jacob.

I would feel the same way!

Originally Posted by beth83

I loved them and still have the book now, they probably are a bit 'dated' but they are lovely stories.

Thanks I will have to check that out to see if our library has it.

Originally Posted by beth83

I'm not sure if you can get on DVD but there is an episode of The Bear in the Big Blue House about becoming a older sibling which we found helped, I think it was a boy becoming the older sibling but the baby turned out to be a girl so it might help.

Ooo a movie would be great too! Thanks

[Kimagine]

I had the boys design shirts to wear to the hospital to meet the baby... each got to pick out the color of the shirt and the font and such, and the shirts said, "I'm the Big Brother" on the front. They were kept aside so that they could only be worn when the baby was born. This way, they felt like they were also going to be a big part of the delivery day -- even though they weren't there until after her birth, people fussed over them, too.