They WHAT?! Funny stories about the kids in your life

[LilyLunaPotter]

Originally Posted by beth83

Oh how the mind of a 2 year old works! Dylan doesn't actually play our Wii he spends most of the time ducking from over enthusiatic adults!

So yesterday I was on ze computer, and my little brother (2) comes up and says, "I wanna play hotwheels!" (He has an obbsesion with cars.) SO I said, "All-right one second." and he goes, "No NOW!" And im all, "Excuse me?" and he gets right up in my face and says, "I gonna eat you!" "I gonna EAT you!!" Then he trys to bite me!

.... I dont even know where he got that from......

[Vita]

Tonight after an all day eating binge our family took the little ones out for sledding on the new sleds Santa brought. My 21 month old niece was having a blast sledding and was giggling the whole time. Her dad stopped by where we were standing and I asked if she was having fun. She nodded and smiled. I then asked "can I try sledding?" She then, plain as day said "No, you'll break you neck." LOL! She continues to surprise us of all the things she knows how to say. We just about died from laughing.

[Lizzy_Potter]

My little brother made up a rap that he does while on all fours and bobbing his head up and down with a blanket draped over him. He calls it "The Bantha Rap" It goes something like this: (Banthas are creatures from Star Wars. They don't live on Kashyyk.)

" 'Cause I'm a Bantha!
I'm a Bantha!
Tusken Raiders poke me with their sticks
and that really stinks
I'm a Tusken Raider
I'm a Tusken Raider
I'm Tusken Raider transportation!
I'm on Kashyyk!
I'm on Kashyyk!
Jacen
Jaina
Jacen
Jaina
My stupid bantha sister (Me, supposedly)
sprayed glitter on a towel
that I dried off with so...
I'm a sparkly Bantha!
Sparkly Bantha!
WHUT!"

....I have no idea where he got that. He's 11. (I told him that if he sang like that in the old days, people would have stoned him.)

[Morning_Star]

We (my sister, brother and I) got Mario Kart Wii for Christmas, and of course my brother (he will be five April 1.) loves playing it. The other day he played as Donkey Kong, and suddenly he burst out: "Donkey Kong has boobs. But he hasn't got milk in them, it's ape juice." Needless to say, we almost died with laughter.

[LilyLunaPotter]

Originally Posted by Morning_Star

We (my sister, brother and I) got Mario Kart Wii for Christmas, and of course my brother (he will be five April 1.) loves playing it. The other day he played as Donkey Kong, and suddenly he burst out: "Donkey Kong has boobs. But he hasn't got milk in them, it's ape juice." Needless to say, we almost died with laughter.

That made me laugh so hard!

[Morning_Star]

Originally Posted by LilyLunaPotter

That made me laugh so hard!

Yes, he has his moments... Like when we were driving past a dump for household waste, where it of course stinked, he asked my sister: "Did you just fart?" We still laugh until we cry, also because of his expression and cute way of speaking... I don't understand where he gets all his funny thoughts from, like when he asked how it was for our Grandmother how it was to live with the dinosaurs!

[KeepItDark]

my brother, a few years ago ( i think he was 15/16 at the time), said:

"A plane with four engines does NOT fly."

then i proceeded to show him planes with four engines. and that they did in fact fly.

[witchgirl]

I've got many of these kind of stories. I have four younger brothers and sisters and four kids of my own.

Our town isn't all that big and there still alot of buildings being built, that yr they had just built the first strip club, it's built to look like a castle. Well my youngest son I think he was about 2 or 3 yrs old was in the car with my mom and I and asked us what that building was for cause it had pictures of women on it. I laughed and told him he didn't need to know, my mom tells him that where men go to watch women dance, and before i could even finish telling my mom that he didn't need to know that, my son pipes up and says ''Thats gross, they must be per-verts''

heres one on my lil sister lol

she was about 16 i think, I was watching a show about deep sea spear diving, and some one was asking me what was the size of the last fish i told them and then i remember something where i read how this man caught a 600lb tuna with just a spear gun, so i was finishing telling him it when my sister asked me how that got all that tuna into those lil can.

[deathplce4myhed]

Well this little child is not in my life anymore...

Ivan was my step dads girlfriends son..when this happened he was like 5...

My older brother use to go on the roof of our old house and of course Ivan wants up there, but he isn't aloud to be up there, so my brother would be like "I flew up here" then Ivan was like "well can you make me fly up there" and my brother(and me somewhat) were like saying well it only works sometimes and like he can't make you go up there and got him to believe my brother can fly and was magic...(course this was when he was 5 he is like 8 now!) sounds so mean now

[LilyLunaPotter]

My little brother, he's 3 years old, absolutely adores Bill Kaulitz (y'know from Tokio Hotel). Every time I'm on the computer he goes, "Bill? Where's Bill? Can I watch Bill? Bill is awesome!"
And he loves their song Scream, and he can sing the chorus. My grandparents are home, and last night when we were eating I was like, "*coughSCREAMcough*" and he starts, "Scream, 'till you feel it! Scream 'till you believe! Scream, and when it hurts you, SCREAM IT OUTLOUD!!! Scream 'till you feel it! Scream 'till you believe it! Scream and when it hurts you SCREAM IT OUTLOUD!" Then he does the rock sign with his hands, and yells, "ROCK ON!"

Apparently I have corrupted my young innocent brother...but seriously, it's as funny as hell

[hotpinkwerepups]

OK, so theres this stuff called "pipe dope" it's a purple primer you put in PBC pipes before you glue them together. My dad uses it to fix sprinklers.
I was about 2-3 and we were at the mall, my parents ran into a friend from work. They were talking and my mom said we had to go because we needed to get to Home Depot before it closed. I immediatley agreed with her saying "Ya, we need to go. Daddy needs to go get some dope for his pipe!"

[Larrythehobbit]

So about 6 weeks ago my friend's Specer and Rebeka came over for dinner. Now mind you this is the first time my wife and I are meeting Beka. So it's after dinner and were all hanging out in the living chatting my son Sam is asleep but our older son Collin is ready for bed but getting to hang out for a little while with the adults.

Collin is sitting on Bekas lap talking to her when he decides to feel her up and asks Beka "are these your boobies?"

Karole and are were pretty embarrased ans well as Beka but Spencer loved it.

[potterstinks123]

Don't have kids, I'm too young, lol. But I remember when I was ten I wanted to heat a hard boiled egg up. Terrible idea. I never took the shell off. I put it in for a minute, heard a loud op, and it dissapeared like magic!!! Nothing remained. i honestly thought harry potter ate it...ask my mom, i was freekishly so into believing the stories were real.

[tripletkate607]

I baby-sit my neighbor's twin boys a lot. They're 10 months old now, and SO CUTE! They make me happy... They seem to have senses of humor already - I'm convinced they're going to be the next Fred and George. But today I was changing their diapers and one of them had a spoon down the front of his! It was strange...I was kinda shocked and when I pulled it out the kid starts laughing like a maniac! What the heck? Haha, I love those guys.

[Shingie]

Don't have kids, I'm too young, lol. But I remember when I was ten I wanted to heat a hard boiled egg up. Terrible idea. I never took the shell off. I put it in for a minute, heard a loud op, and it dissapeared like magic!!! Nothing remained.

When I was like 8 I went through this stage of eating raw eggs. But the problem was they were always cold when I gulped them down, so I stuck a raw egg in the microwave for about 15 seconds and when it came out, it was cooked! XD Then I would cook my eggs that way.

Anyway, my story....

When I was really little my grandmother/mom/dad had this huge bamboo stick that they would use to whip me and my brother. (it hurt like ****)

Eventually what I did was I hid the stick from my parents so if they tried to whip me they wouldn't be able to find the branch, but if my older brother got in trouble, I would innocently bring out the stick and tell them, "Here's the stick, mommy."

LOL I'm so evil to my brother.

[MarauderLove]

Theres an old video of my brother on his 3rd birthday opening presents. He gets to this huge one and tears off the wrapping paper and whatever it is (I can't remember now...) is inside a cardboard box. My dad, being funny says "Oh look! You got a box!" and my brother proceeded to scream "YAY! A BOX!" and he was generally so stoked about it

[MC2456]

When I was four, I pulled down the whole washing machine. It was a wonder that it didn't squash little me. I think I was saved by my guardian angel. Or I'd be an angel right now Oh wait...that's not funny...that's a miracle I wasn't squashed to death.

I got another one. Me opening the kitchen cabinet and taking out ALL the stuff from it. I think I was three...because I was quite small, but I still remember it. I liked to take stuff out. My mom made me put everything back again. We have a picture of it.

[flimseycauldron]

Two funnies.

My son is 8 years old and could be a surgeon in training. He was wrestling with his father and nailed him with his knee in the side. My husband oomphed hard. My son then asked him in a concerned voice--
'I'm sorry, Daddy, did I hit you in the pancreas?"

My nephew was afraid of getting his vaccinations. All through the day he was very nervous. When the nurse finally came in for the shots he got very quiet and closed his eyes. He didn't cry or breath heavy. After she was done his mom asked if he was okay. He said yes, it didn't even hurt. She asked him why not. His answer? "I turned myself into Humongasaur." (A Ben 10 referenced to all you moms out there!)

[mexicant]

Originally Posted by flimseycauldron

My nephew was afraid of getting his vaccinations. All through the day he was very nervous. When the nurse finally came in for the shots he got very quiet and closed his eyes. He didn't cry or breath heavy. After she was done his mom asked if he was okay. He said yes, it didn't even hurt. She asked him why not. His answer? "I turned myself into Humongasaur." (A Ben 10 referenced to all you moms out there!)

Okay, that is just too too cute.

[yarnmom77]

My 3 year old daughter has started meowing all of the time and asked us to call her Fluffy. Should I be worried?