Ask Snape - The Game

[megan_black]

Severus,
yes, yes Severus, I understand

Minerva

-----------------------------------------------------

Professor Snape,

what do YOU do when you like a girl? (NO! I am not inpling I like that Lovegood girl, It's Astoria Greengrass!!)
Ok, I know, you should only be helping me with my studies and such, but... please?! I have no one else to go to with this! and you know my mother! If I told her she would get all teary and say "my little boy is growing up!" and if I mentioned this to my dad, he would just say "go tell her son" HELP! PLEASE!

I'm dessperet,
Draco

[jnette]

Draco,
Whatever you do, DO NOT INSULT HER. If you do anything to hurt her feelings, apologize immediatley and MEAN IT. Also, work on your spelling; sending a small note inviting her for lunch in Hogsmeade may be a good idea. Be yourself, no matter what; pretending to be something for someone else never works out.

As for your studies, it may be a good idea to study with Astoria; she's a great student. Always be a gentleman--no matter what your little friends may say!

Professor Snape


Dear Severus,
I was wondering if you could help out with this year's New Year's party in Hogsmeade. We need some witches and wizards to help out with the muggles. Let me explain-- the Ministry has seen fit to gather some good hearted muggles and show them our world. We need to put our best foot forward, and I know your a great wizard and would be able to help. Please owl me.

Minerva

[megan_black]

Professor Snape,
Thank you!!
I invited her to go to hogsmead, and guess what, she said yes!!

Draco

----------------------------------------

Minerva,
Sure! wonderful idea! so, who are they? wait! one flaw with that plan, what happens if the ministry finds out? or are the in on it too?

Severus

[jnette]

Severus,
Yes, the Ministry approved of this. The only muggles that will be invited will be properly screened; we can't have any nonsense. Also, it will be lots of muggles who have children who are witches and wizards who either attend Hogwarts, or have attended Hogwart's. Other muggles who will be present include those who are friendly with the wizarding world and mean no harm. Other than that, there will be a few muggles who will be new to the idea of our world--it's important that the other muggles present show them that we are all in this world together. As for your part in it, we'll need some stores of various potions on hand just in case something occurs--if someone freaks out, gets ill, that sort of thing. Also, bring a good store of Veritaserum because we just don't know if any left over death eaters will be using polyjuice potion to crash the party. Thanks.

Minerva


Professor Snape,
So sorri to bothr you, but i am having troubl with the unikorns. They seem sikc, and I was wondering if you had any good poshons for them. Sorri about mi speling.

Hagrid

[megan_black]

Minerva,
Natrually, I ALWAYS bring a few spare potions to something like this

Severus

-----------------------------------------

Hagrid,
no problem with the spelling, mabey we could get together and I could teach you a few words

As for the Unicorns, they may be with child, if you know what I mean. Take them to a profesional, oh, also, I have enclosed a bottle of potion that makes the Unicorns calm and happy, so iff they are sick, when they take this potion, they will feel better for a couple weeks

oh and please, call me Severus

Severus

[Raven95]

Draco, how did your dance go? Was she good to you?
I hope you were on your best behavior for her and didn't try to impress anyone.
I did that for Lily and got into trouble with the class. All I wanted was her attention.
It's natural for someone to always approve of someone. When they don't listen to us, we feel rejected.
Then we're in the wrong crowd.

Severus Snape


I took them to the vet and now I have baby unicorns. Severus, thank you for your help.

Hagrid

[megan_black]

Hagrid,
there you go

Minerva asked me to tell you this:
DO NOT LET THE BABY UNICORNS INTO THE FORBIDDEN FOREST ALONE

also, I see your spelling has improved, good job!

Severus

--------------------------------------------------

Professor Snape,
Yes!! and don't worry, I only try to impress people when Potter is around, the only person in my house who knows what I am like when I am not around Potter, is now Astoria Greengrass!
again, THANK YOU!

Draco

[Daggerstone]

Dear Draco,

Don't mention it.
Ever.

Professor S. Snape


_ _ _



Dear Professor Snape,

As you may be aware, there is an International Magical Portrait Exhibition at Beauxbatons next month and we have been asked to provide a list of Hogwarts' representatives. Your response seems to be the only one missing from our archive; please be so kind to provide one via Gustave Doré's Raven (enclosed).


With kindest regards,
Iolanthe Geegal
Magical Arts & Crafts Guild

[FutureAuthor13]

Dear Iolanthe Geegal,

Most unfotunately, I will not be present- I'm sure I'll think of something dreadfully important to do whilst your little "gathering" is in session.

~Professor Snape
------------------------
Dear Ssseverus,

I wisssh to sssay that I deeply regret my actionsss in the Sssshrieking Sssshack lassst year, they were mosssstly out of my control.

Yoursss Sssincerely,
Nagini

[Daggerstone]

Dearessst Sssnake-Who-Ssshall-Not-Be-Misssed,

Ssssod off.

Snape


_ _ _

Dear Professor Snape:    

---

[FutureAuthor13]

Originally Posted by Daggerstone

Dear Professor Snape:    

---

Love it.
-------------------------
Dear Mr and Mrs Potter,

Fine. However, if the charming Mrs Black decides to scream for all eternity, please feel free to shoot my portrait.

~Professor Snape
-----------------------------
Snape,

Enough with the hexes, already. I admit that I was a git to in school but that doesn't give you an excuse to curse me in the Afterlife!

(Besides, the boils really hurt. Really...)

~James Potter

[megan_black]

Potter,
fine

Snape

-------------------------------------------

Severus,
please, call us Harry and Ginny, Harry's parents were Mr. and Mrs. Potter, but anyway, thank you for coming, Harry apreciates you greatly, I hope you know that

Ginny Potter

[Raven95]

Ginny, I'm well aware what the names of Harry's and your parents are.
I'm sure in Harry's darkest mind comes an indignation for me.

Professor Snape


Snape, I took lessons as a child from a muggle who taught me phoenix.
I'm not at all retarded as you may think.
If you had told me sooner about it being Minerva, I wouldn't never guessed.

Hagrid

[Daggerstone]

Hagrid,

I never thought you retarded, merely incompetent.
And the Muggle would have rendered you a greater service with English.

S. Snape


_ _ _


Dear Severus,

Please be so kind to unward your stores for Horace and his charges. The acquisition of new supplies is draining the school's resources, and having students and members of staff traipsing around with heads the size of Hagrid's pumpkins is simply unacceptable.

Minerva

[ignisia]

Dear Minerva,

As most of said "charges" have made it quite clear that they consider themselves too important to sit in on lectures...I see no difference.

Tell Horace to sell his stores of candied pineapple and buy his own ingredients.

S.

---

Um, dear Professor Snape,

Erm, do you remember last class, when I accidentally melted another cauldron and the potion got on my ears and turned them into eggplants? Well, Madam Pomfrey can't seem to fix them, and she wants you to have a look. Sorry about the cauldron...and your desk...and the floor, although it's a really nice blue, so if you can't fix it...anyway, she wants you to come up and have a look. Please don't take anymore points, I really didn't mean for it to happen.

Neville Longbottom

[FutureAuthor13]

Longbottom,

I refuse to help someone who begins a letter with "um." Perhaps eggplants will be better than the ears you used to have for they certainly seemed incapable of listening to me, at any rate.

~Professor Snape
------------------------------
Severus,

Thank you so much for helping me at the start of this year. Draco may not appear to appreciate it, but he is really a lonely, scared, frightened boy.

Yours gratefully,
Narcissa

[Daggerstone]

Dear Narcissa,

Draco's independent use of Hogwarts facilities was one of the highlights of my teaching career, I assure you.
Too bad that Potter brat brought a relapse in his phobia. Unfortunately, there was nothing I could do about it.

Sincerely
(well, almost)
Severus

_ _ _


Dear Professor Snape,

I came to the Astronomy tower to serve detention like you told me, but that was three days ago; it's getting kind of chilly here.

Can we please reschedule for next Tuesday?

Respectfully,
Gregory Goyle

[Raven95]

Gregory Goyle, absolutely not. I'll arrange for the wool blankets via owl.
You must serve your full sentence before you can BE A MAN!

Professor Snape


Severus what is this about telling Narcissa about me being a brat?
She reprimanded me on it and I simply told her, you're not always easy to deal WITH!
I had to explain to her that I haven't said anything to Draco that would make him afraid.
I never liked him that much that I had to cross him.

Your fellow student,

Harry Potter

[FutureAuthor13]

Originally Posted by Daggerstone

Dear Narcissa,

Draco's independent use of Hogwarts facilities was one of the highlights of my teaching career, I assure you.
Too bad that Potter brat brought a relapse in his phobia. Unfortunately, there was nothing I could do about it.

Sincerely
(well, almost)
Severus

------------------
Potter,

Shut up and leave me alone- take your arrogance with you.

~Professor Snape
-----------------------
Dear Severus,

There was no need for that response- I was merely thanking you. Next time, I won't bother if that's how you take my gratitude.

Iritated,
Narcissa

[megan_black]

Narcissa,
so sorry, Potter is giving a rough time...

Severus

-----------------------------

Severus,
grow up!! I thought you said I was like my mother!! JUST BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE MY DAD DOES NOT MEAN I ALWAYS ACT LIKE HIM!! tell me ONE time I ever called you snivillus? or used levicorpus on you in front of the whole school? I AM THE ONE BEING MADE FUN OF! have you ever thought or listened to what anyone calls me? THEY SAY I AM AN IDIOT! have you seen those badges people wore during the tri-wizard tonament? Hmm? NO!


Harry