Ask Snape - The Game

[Sinistra_Furze]

Ms Sackhouse-Baggins

I see, you're “Spooky Sackhouse-Baggins” now. I should have known from the ridiculous choice of name that it was plain Florence Bench. There are a few things I think I should clear up.

Firstly, I had no idea you had changed your name, again.
Secondly, I had no idea you were working for Curious Critters Inc. Indeed, I have taken not the slightest interest in your career since that wretched expedition.
Thirdly, if you had had any sense at the time you would have allowed me to administer Veritaserum to the main suspect, thus clarifying once and for all the cause of the regrettable loss of the expedition leaders' sanity. As it was, you insisted on trusting the word of a person who has since become notorious for their … unreliability.

Turning to the libellous accusation that I have been attempting to get you sacked, it appears your paranoia has got the better of you. If you hadn't insisted on consuming such large quantities of tlaloc-tlapatl juice you might have held on to sufficient portion of your wits to be able to hold down a job or a sensible conversation, for longer than five minutes. Your present difficulties with your employer have nothing to do with me and everything to do with your own personal shortcomings.

I'd advise you to consider your situation carefully before taking any rash decisions. Particularly, it would be inadvisable to mention your participation in an expedition which ended so disastrously for all concerned. I will, on my part, write to Mr Savage, explaining my misunderstanding over your identity and withdraw my enquiry from Curious Critters Inc.

And I'd appreciate it very much if you did not bother me again with your incoherent ravings.


S Snape

---------------------------


Albus,

Filius and I have become concerned about young Whetstone, who has had some trouble settling into Ravenclaw House this year. There appear to be some difficulties regarding his family (particularly his Grandmother) which I have so far unsuccessfully attempted to clarify.

There is also the matter of his unexpected “gifts”. You know about the pet snake. However, it had emerged in conversation with the lad that he has unusual talents which he needs careful guidance in mastering. I have begun instructing him during detentions but would like to talk the matter over with you personally, before we speak to the boy.

Whilst in the Hog's Head last week I saw an advertisement for a home for a young black cat, whose previous owner had died. I thought this might make a suitable pet for Whetstone. Do you think it a good idea to present it to him at the meeting on Monday?

Severus

PS Sorry, the waffles are gone, but I could spare a few ice mice.

[SadiraSnape]

Hm, no question for Sir... that's okay. Albus will answer and then we'll ask Sir something.
----------------

Severus --

I think it wise to discuss young Mr Whetstone's gifts before meeting with him. We should all definitely be on the same page, especially in regards to these particular abilities.

The Sorting Hat has suddenly piped up, and here is what it said:

In Ravenclaw a youngster dwells
Whose pet has made Snape's ankle swell
Fear not, the cure is close at hand
A shipment from a far off land.
As for the boy, I tell you this:
Perhaps a trick or two I missed.
Bring him here, brook no delay!
To make his worries go away
A backtrack potion I must brew
Even a Hat can miss a clue.

How odd. The Hat rarely says anything outside the Sorting Ceremony.

I think the cat would be a lovely gesture, Severus -- be careful, though, I might begin to think you care! And thank you for the ice mice. Pity you had no waffling wands left.

Albus

--------------------

Professor Snape:

Thanks for the update on Bobby. A smooth snake x basilisk cross, eh? How fascinating. That would certainly explain the not-killing thing.

But I wonder where he got the green eyes? They are quite lovely, as long as you use a mirror to look at them. Those headaches are murder.

I appreciate receiving the contact information for Mr Oldbridge -- I shall contact him soonest. Perhaps I can get more information out of him. As well as fudhar root and leaves! Thanks for the tip.

BTW, do you need anything from our stores? We have some lovely dragon dung if you're running low...

Charlie Weasley

[Sinistra_Furze]

Mr Weasley,

thank you for your kind offer. I have a surplus of Dragon dung but would be indebted to you for a flagon of Dragon's blood (type A preferably). And some seeds of the rare Nigritella found in that area would be of particular value for a Newt-level class I am planning.

Yours

Prof. Snape


-----------------



Albus,


thank you for sharing the Sorting Hat's lyrical contribution. This is a most unusual situation. Do you think there is enough doubt over Whetstone's first sorting to make a second attempt worthwhile? The consequences of this could be far-reaching.

About the boy's errr.. talents. I.. that is, Whetstone has....It has come to my attention that young Whetstone is, in some instances, able to access the thoughts of those about him. I believe his Grandmother is aware of this, and instructed him not to let it be known. His ability doesn't seem to have be learnt, but a natural talent ineffectively restrained. As you know, it is usually necessary to maintain eye contact, but in my reminiscence I don't think that he needs to. An owl sent by the boy (I'll bring it with me) revealed a knowledge of my thoughts on a topic I certainly would not have consciously shared with a student. I have, of course, taken steps to ensure this does not happen again, and have started instruction of basic mind-calming techniques. However, we need to impress on him the importance of restricting the use of his talents; some students have already expressed unease around him.

His uncle, the disagreeable A.A. Oldbridge, has been obstructive to my enquiries into Whetstone's family situation. I wonder if Oldbridge has been taking advantage of the boy's talents inappropriately, for the collection of restricted, even dangerous, beasts, or for gathering information useful for his commercial activities. If so there is a real risk the family will simply withdraw him from School, fearing exposure, if they suspect the direction of our enquiries.

I have claimed the cat, which has an amiable disposition, and is presently pursuing a charmed ice mouse around my office.

Severus


------------------------- ---

Professor Snape, Sir,

I was wondering if you would write me a note for access to the Restricted section of the library, because I am doing some homework that is very interesting and I want to do some more research on it, Sir.

Yours

Siggy Whetstone

[SadiraSnape]

Mr Whetstone --

It is normally the province of the teacher who assigned the homework to ensure you have access to all the materials you need. You should ask him or her for permission to enter the Restricted Area.

Prof Snape

---------------------------

Prof Snape:

A student has been annoying me with loud requests to get into the Restricted Section. He claims to be doing homework which requires access, but he is only a First Year, and I must question what sort of First Year homework requires such access. Please advise if you have been assigning such advanced homework?

And please remind this student to keep his voice down! Really...

Mme. Pince

[Sinistra_Furze]

Mme. Pince,

I have not assigned any homework requiring access to the Restricted Section for First year students. Could you tell me which student it was, and what subject they were interested in?
You can be sure I'll remind all students in my House to respect the quiet of the Library. Please report to me any future incidents and I will ensure they have no inclination to repeat their misbehaviour.


Prof.Snape



--------------------------



Prof Snape,

I've just had that young first year, Whetstone down here asking a lot of odd questions. Seems he's interested in finding out how to obtain Kelpie mane. It's rare stuff, that, said to be powerful in charms to prevent the loss of valuable possessions. Anyhow, I told him what I know, you need dragonhide gloves and a silver knife, or else you'll get carried away and drowned. Seems like the lad has a fanciful notion he's going to be able to find such a rare beast round here! Hahahaha. Said his Uncle was visiting at the weekend, too, but to be honest he looked more worried than pleased about it. In fact, if I didn't know better, I'd say he was close to tears. Id've spoken to Prof Flitwick about it first, but the boy was muttering something as he left and I'm sure he mentioned your name. Something a bit strange goin' on, if you ask me. Do you know anything about it?




Rubeus Hagrid

[SadiraSnape]

Hagrid --

Thank you for letting me know about the kelpie mane request. Just a minute... (hack wheeze cough cough wheeeeeze) (moan while holding head in hands)

There. Got a bit of a lung thing going on here at the moment... It did not help that Fang shook all that bloody lake water over me the other night, after leaping about and befouling my robes in his excessive display of affection. Is there a reason you can't train that beast to not be such an almighty bother? For Merlin's sake, man, it was freezing cold and it was hours before I could take a hot shower and change! That beast is a menace... If I die, it's Fang's fault, and I shall haunt you both. That is a promise.

Back to Whetstone... this boy is going to be the death of me. Sometimes I think Argus has it right, we need to reinstitute beatings and manacles...

At any rate, I shall speak with young Whetstone. In future please tell him to direct his more esoteric queries to his head of house (Filius) or to me. Kelpies indeed...

Severus

------------------------------

Prof. Snape --

The boy's name escapes me at the moment, something like Knifeblade, Daggerstone, Wetwipe, Wigginton, Wigglesworthy... I don't know. It is not my duty to get the names of students trying to access the Restricted section unless they present the proper credentials.

As for the subject matter, I believe he was wanting to get to the Magical Beasts area, as well as the Wizarding Genealogy section. He seemed most distraught -- has it become standard for children with apparently severe emotional issues to be admitted to Hogwarts now?

I certainly hope not. I have enough to deal with regarding nasty children who misuse books to be saddled with hysterical students disrupting my library.

Mme. Pince

[Sinistra_Furze]

Mme. Pince

since I must travel to London tonight to attend to the paperwork on a large delivery of potions ingredients, I've asked Prof. Flitwick to quietly keep an eye on the boy (Whetstone by name) to discover what he is up to. He has been spoken to about his behaviour, but he's a secretive child and it's uncommonly difficult to read his intentions.Threats have little effect on this persistent little nuisance. But you can be sure I will find him out yet. Under no circumstances is he to be allowed into the Restricted section, however plausible his excuses. Send him directly to Prof Flitwick should he make a scene again.

Severus


---- ---- ----- -----


Severus!


I hardly know where to begin. Oh dear! I hope this Owl finds you swiftly, I sent the fastest I could find. Late this evening I was patrolling the corridors as usual and discovered Whetstone sneaking out of your office! I ordered him to turn out his pockets, but all he had was a silver knife which he insisted "It's mine and I need it".
On asking how he managed to get past your protective charms and enchantments he said "I overheard Prof. Snape thinking about the changes he had made to them, during my last detention, and I just went to the library to look up the counter- spells." I could get no more information out of him and sent him back to his dormitory.
I thought we had impressed on him the need to manage his talents wisely after our meeting with Albus last week. And after you gave him the lovely pet cat too! He's named it "Morpheus" for some inexplicable reason...

But what shall we do, Severus? This could mean expulsion unless we can find out what on earth he is up to. What do you suggest?


Filius

[SadiraSnape]

Filius --

I shall expedite my business in London and return posthaste. If you could round young Mr Whetstone up along with his personal effects, I shall immediately place him into Slytherin House. He does not need to be in Ravenclaw one more moment. I have a spare private room he and his cat ("Morpheus?" Quite a well-read little nuisance, isn't he? I wonder if there's a deeper meaning there... or perhaps the cat told him that was his name. I shouldn't be surprised) may occupy -- I think at this juncture private lodgings would be best.

This owl will not precede me by long, so I suggest everything be in place when I return.

Severus

-----------------------

Prof Snape sir --

We house elves is asking if the spare room in the dungeon is really where you wants to place Siggy Whetstone. Siggy Whetstone is a nice boy to house elves, always keeps his room neat, but there is somethings odd about him, we don't knows for sure. If Prof Snape is sure, we will of course prepares the rooms, yes we will, but we think Prof Snape should be aware that Siggy Whetstone is a different boy from the usual run of Hogwarts students, and so is that cats he has for a pets. We isn't sure we likes that cat.

Please lets us know, there is a spares rooms in the regular dormitory we cans put him in.

Dobby

[Sinistra_Furze]

Dobby,

I would be interested to hear more about your misgivings concerning Whetstone and his cat. I will visit you shortly after I return. In the meantime, please carry out my instructions.


Prof. Snape


----- ----- -----

Severus


I really don't see why you want Whetstone to be moved from Ravenclaw. He has begun to settle in, thanks to his willingness to assist other students with their homework, and the friendliness of his new pet. The Headmaster saw no reason to move him, and to isolate him at this critical time would not be in his best interests. Why go to such lengths just because you have been outwitted by a student. And how were you so careless as to allow him access to your thoughts? You of all people, Severus, to be so unguarded!

But that is not my greatest concern at present. His Housemates confirm Whetstone returned to his dorm as instructed last night, but had left again before they woke this morning and he is nowhere to be found. The Headmaster has left the School saying only

"I thought something like this might happen. I hope my preparations will have been effective." and rushed off before I could ask any more.

I have instructed the House Elves to leave his posessions where they are for now, to avoid alarming the other students. I'll bring you up-to-date when you return.



Filius

[SadiraSnape]

Filius --

I assure you, I am not requesting his removal due to being "outwitted" by a student, or having been caught "unguarded". The boy is a natural Legilimens, and one of the more powerful I've met (and you know the standard I have regarding that) -- you have no conception of my consternation on learning he was able to breach the guards I set up after discovering his little talent; while not the same level I would use with the Dark Lord, they were quite strong. Trust me, I would much prefer this particular specimen of annoying First Year continued to haunt your hallowed halls rather than have him constantly underfoot in my house.

I have asked you to move him to protect your students, as well as yourself. He does not know how to control his ability, and must be isolated until he has learned how. He is going into a spare room, alone, to protect my students. I intend to conduct intensive Legilimency/Occlumency training with him immediately -- his other classes will be suspended for now until we have this under control.

I request again that you remove his belongings to the spare room I indicated previously. I have also notified Albus; he approves the move, both to the room and to Slytherin. Mr Whetstone is not only a nuisance, he is a hazardous nuisance, and one I personally do not want running rampant in the minds of the students or the staff. I too hope Albus' preparations are sufficient; I shudder to think of the alternative.

Severus

-------------------

Professor Snape, sir --

We has prepared the room for Siggy Whetstone, but Dobby heard Professor Flitwick say he couldn't find Siggy Whetstone and that house-elves were to leave Siggy Whetstone's belongings where they were!

As for that cat, there's something different about that cat -- Dobby thinks that cat has magic of its own, yes he does. Is it possible that cat is part Kneazle too? Those Kneazles are tricky tricky creatures.

Oh, Dobby also knows that Siggy Whetstone got hold of some gillyweed from somewhere, he imagines it was the same place Dobby got some once before... Dobby apologizes for that and will iron his hands tonight.

Does Professor Snape have any idea why Siggy Whetstone would want gillyweed? Dobby has many questions about this whole situation...

Your friend,

Dobby

[Sinistra_Furze]

Dobby

Please move Whetstone's belongings as instructed, if you have not already done so.
Thank you for informing me about the gillyweed. There will be absolutely no need for you to iron your hands.

I’ve made further enquiries about the cat. Aberforth declares he “noticed nothing unusual about it” whilst it was in his care, but noted the previous owner had died after falling asleep over a cauldron of Ageing potion, being several hundred years old by the time he was found. Since Whetstone, who has an uncanny understanding of magical creatures, has named the cat “Morpheus” I think it prudent not to allow the cat into the kitchens. It doesn’t look Kneazle-like to me, more Burmese. Having deprived Whetstone of one pet, I’m reluctant to remove this one as well, so keep a watch on it and let me know if you think it might be dangerous.

Prof. Snape






Severus

Good news at last! I’ve finally managed to locate and retrieve young Whetstone after some lengthy negotiations with the Merpeople of the lake. I was concerned, from the information you and Hagrid passed to me, that he had been pressurised to try to get some Kelpie mane for his Uncle. Being a bright boy he went prepared not only with dragonhide gloves and his silver knife (hats off to his wits there! Suggesting you consider the defences to your office then reading your thoughts on it!), but with gillyweed too, should he be dragged into the water as Kelpies like to do. However, Whetstone failed to realise the gillyweed might wear out before he had managed to release himself. By forewarning the Merpeople and asking them to look out for him we were able to avert a tragedy. But at a price. More of that later. For now it enough that he is safe and well and dripping unhappily on my best carpet.

I’d be grateful if you would come and fetch him and make sure he is comfortably settled in his temporary quarters. Over the next few weeks I will attempt to advise him on making the most of his opportunities at the School while you will be helping him to control his abilities to the benefit of us all.

We must also consider how to deal with his family, who as his Guardians, have exploited rather than nurtured him. Further investigation will be needed to decide if it becomes a criminal matter. The Ministry may decide to appoint a more suitable Guardian for him. In preparation would you write down everything you know about his family for me and renew your enquiries discretely. You have permission to leave the School, if necessary.

I expect frequent reports on your progress.


Albus

PS I have called in a favour from an old acquaintance at Curious Critters Inc. and they are sending someone to take a look at the mysterious Morpheus for us.Would you look after them while they are here? Thanks.

[merrymarge]

what else has happened to Siggy Whetstone?

[SadiraSnape]

Don't know -- I think Prof. Snape had a relapse of his cold and is just now getting back on his feet. I expect he'll be posting in the next day or so...

[merrymarge]

I thought it was an interesting story.

[SadiraSnape]

Albus --

As you know, young Whetstone has been safely ensconced in his new quarters for a couple of weeks now, and I'm pleased to report he has proved a willing and capable student of Occlumency (I have been holding off on Legilimency, as he is far too gifted in that). I have also taken the precaution of placing a Barrier Charm on him, so that he is not able to so easily access the thoughts of others.

I have not been able to get away long enough to do any discreet inquiries on his family, but that is my first priority after I'm more secure in Whetstone's ability to control himself.

As for The Cat, when will your contact at Curious Critters be arriving? This creature is driving me spare -- he disappears at all hours of the day and night, chases sparkly things hither and yon, and more than once I have caught him on the top shelf of the Potions storeroom, investigating my most tightly controlled supplies.

Severus

============================

My Dear Prof. Snape:

Allow me to introduce myself. I am Marjorie Whetstone, young Sydney Whetstone's grandmother. I shall be arriving at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to remove Sydney from your institution -- I feel his temperament and abilities are better suited to home schooling than a boarding school situation.

Please inform Sydney that this Friday will be his last day, and that he will present himself at the front entry at 9 am sharp to return home. I will brook no delay, and there is no discussion of this matter.

Thank you.

Marjorie Whetstone

[Sinistra_Furze]

Albus

Yes, I understand the school does not have the power to prevent Siggy’s family from removing him. It is equally obvious from our lessons that he is terrified of them. He doesn’t want to leave the School, but seems resigned to it. His family are well-connected and it will be difficult to resist them without firm evidence. Remember, Oldbridge managed to escape without censure even after admitting importing Basilisk-cross snakes without licence. I hope to meet a contact on Tuesday night at the Hog’s Head who used to work in Oldbridge’s office. It might be possible discover something about his dubious business enterprises.
You have hinted there may be an impediment to his family’s decision. Won’t you confide in me what that might be? It could help my investigations.


Severus

PS Do you know who Curious Critters are sending to look at Morpheus on Monday? They might want to look at this note sent me this morning by Mme. Pince.

----
“Severus,

I am most dreadfully sorry to tell you, I don't know how it happened, but last night after tidying up and shooing out the last students, I fell asleep at my desk. I hadn't been feeling particularly tired and it's never happened before. I woke much later and making a quick check round I noticed the undetectable wards at the entrance to the Restricted section had been broken. Someone has been in there. I can't begin to imagine who it was - I'm sure the library was clear of students at the time. The last thing I remember was that lovely black cat jumping up on my desk to demand some attention. After that, nothing!
What's going on, Severus? Something is amiss.

Mme. Pince






Snape,

you malicious little ****, you’ve more nerve than I’d’ve given you credit for. I can’t believe you had the audacity to remove Sydney from his chosen House. And have attempted to increase your influence over him by replacing the pet the family gave him with one of your own choosing. Just like the previous Potions master, trying to ingratiate yourself with talented and influential students to get above your position.

Your outrageous suggestion that I pressured him to undertake a dangerous venture (don’t try to deny it) could not be further from the truth. The boy’s only fault is over-enthusiasm, an eagerness to please. Though misguided, the decision to obtain Kelpie mane was all his own. I’ve overlooked your presumption in the past but this I can’t let pass. Unless I have a full and unreserved apology from you by Friday the Governors will hear of it, and you will soon find yourself unemployed, and unemployable if your reputation is anything to go by. Well, what is it to be?


A A Oldbridge

By the way, I intend to accompany Mrs Whetstone when she collects Sydney. I hope you have the sense to keep well clear.

[merrymarge]

Well, did Siggy Whetstone go home? And what about that cat?

[Sinistra_Furze]

Mr Weasley

Thank you very much for the generous supply of Dragon’s Blood, and the seeds. Having the full licence has enabled me to import a greater range of potions ingredients to the benefit of both my personal research and the School curriculum.

I asked you about the strange cat as I’ve not encountered anything like it before. It has the ability to send people to sleep, to apparently disappear and re-appear at will within the School and has a greater curiosity about its environment than most cats display. I think young Whetstone is able to communicate with it, but I’m not sure how…I’m not even certain where the creature’s loyalties lie. The School Elves are nervous around it which is, in itself, a cause for concern.

I don’t suppose you have come across any information about Whetstone’s uncle, A A Oldbridge, in your work, or by reputation? He somehow wriggled out of the charge of illegally importing those baby Basilisks. He’s well-connected and ruthless where his interests are concerned.

I’ll follow up the research notes your colleagues have made on the Basilisks. It might be difficult to develop the anti-venom before the study results are complete, but I think we have enough new information to make good progress. I’ll keep you informed…


Regards

S Snape


---- ---- ----


Professor Snape, Sir

I’m sorry to bother you again, Sir, but would you write a note so I can get some fresh catnip from the school greenhouses? The shop in Hogsmeade only has dried and Morpheus doesn’t like it. He’s been a bit restless lately. It’s really important that he has the freshest possible.

Thank you

Siggy Whetstone

[merrymarge]

Severus,
I am glad that young Mr. Whetstone is remaining at Hogwarts. It's really better that he is under proper supervision of the school staff.
Horace

[SadiraSnape]

My dear Oldbridge:

Your flailing about and foaming at the mouth (and a rather foul one, at that) do not impress me. Perhaps you should calm yourself before you present yourself at Hogwarts; neither the Headmaster nor I have the time nor the patience for such juvenile displays of pettishness. You sound like a small child who has dropped his bag of sweets down a street drain, and his mum won't buy him another. Tantrums are unbecoming adults.

Sydney will transfer to Slytherin House (and has in fact done so) as planned. The Sorting Hat itself determined it had made a mistake in placing him in Ravenclaw initially, and the boy seems to be settling in well. Indeed, he actually seems happy for the first time since his arrival here -- I believe he feels better protected and appreciated in Slytherin.

I should think you would be pleased that he has such an affinity for Slytherin, given his talents with Bobby (who is also doing quite well at the dragon preserve under Charles Weasley's excellent care). Of course, I can also imagine that his feelings of being accepted and valued for his talents would run counter to your own efforts to keep the boy under your and Mrs. Whetstone's influence and control. Pity that, isn't it?

It is an excellent plan for both you and Mrs. Whetstone to present yourselves here; there are papers that need to be signed in your presence, if not by you. Your previous missive has been most effective in allowing the Governors of the school to determine it is in Sydney's best interests to become a ward of the school.

Keep clear of you? My dear sir, I wouldn't dream of it. I should find it to be an entertaining bit of light exercise to engage with you.

Genuinely anticipating the arrival of the pair of you,

I remain,

Professor Severus Snape

-----------------------------

Mr. Whetstone --

This seems a reasonable request and I shall accede to it. Perhaps it would be prudent for you to seek Prof. Sprout's assistance in laying in sufficient plants for Morpheus' needs. You will of course be responsible for taking care of them as required. I shall approve the acquisition of any necessary materials.

Incidentally, have you noticed any reason for the house elves to be less than pleased with Morpheus? Just curious. Also, it would be wise of you to instruct Morpheus to desist wandering the halls of the castle without you, or without express permission. Mrs. Norris won't appreciate it, and there is really no need for him to do so. If there is something he needs, please inform me and I shall see about providing it.

Professor Snape

-----------------------------

Horace:

Yes, I feel the boy will be better served in Slytherin House and at Hogwarts. Thank you for your kind support.

Severus

-----------------------------

Dear Prof. Snape:

Here's an interesting tidbit I thought you might be interested in hearing about -- have you ever heard of basilisk/kneazle crosses? Or perhaps not so much crosses, but kneazles with basilisk characteristics?

Just curious... we had a visitor here not long ago who was discussing a line of kneazles that were able to put humans into deep sleeps...

Charlie Weasley