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The Diary of.... Me

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Old November 26th, 2004, 6:44 pm
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April 5

Sirius isn't back yet, and everyone's terrified. Joan locked herself in a closet four hours ago, and hasn't come out since. James is skipping all of his classes (Joan's skipping too, rather obvious considering it's 11 o'clock).

We're in the middle of History of Magic, and none of the sixth year Gryffindors are even bothering to pretend to pay attention. Of course, no one is dozing either. Peter and Remus are whispering to each other across the aisle, and Diana and Shannon are talking to each other right behind me. They're having perhaps one of the most...interesting conversations I've heard in a long time.

"Poor Sirius! I can't believe he was sent to court, can you?

"No! He never seemed to be a criniminal type!"

"I know! He's so cute, isn't he?"


"Yeah! Him and James!"

More giggles.

"Well, James's hair isn't very neat, is it?"

"Oh, I don't know, I think it's fine."

"What about Remus?"

"He's too quiet... and he reads too many books."

"He's kind of boring."

"Yeah. What about Peter?"

"Ew... Peter? He's so ugly!"

"I know, but he's friends with James and Sirius!"

"That's true, I guess..."

"I hope Sirius will be okay..."

"He might get life in Azkaban."

"What did he do, do you know?"

"He probably got caught doing a prank."

"They don't send you to court for a prank, do they?"

"Probably. I mean, I heard McGonagall saying to James once that if he took a prank so far he'd end up in serious trouble..."

"Going to court is serious, isn't?"

"I think so. People don't go to court that often, do they?"

"I don't know."

Sometimes, I just don't know what to think. I think something happened to them last night, because they usually aren't that bad. Five more minutes of class!

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Old December 19th, 2004, 3:43 am
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April 6

It probably wouldn't be best to make a habit of this, but I'm writing in the middle of this class, as well. It's Defence Against the Dark Arts, but the professor is just lecturing on dementors for the fourth time in month, and I'm sitting in back, so I'm hoping he'll just think I'm taking my notes.

I honestly do not have a clue as to what is going on, but Sirius came in last night.

We were all sitting in the common room, or nearly all of us. James couldn't hold still. He was like a little boy, jumping up and pacing every few minutes, then sitting down and fumbling with a book, or something before dropping it and pacing once more.

Finally, at quarter to 9 o'clock, Sirius comes into the common room. He finds us, grins, and says, "I'm free..." in a cheerful voice. Something in his eyes didn't seem so gleeful as they should have, but he had a grin on his face, and we were all to happy and relieved to really care.

"That's great!" Alice cried, reaching up to give him a hug.

James stared for a moment, and collapsed to the ground. I think he was going to sit down because that's how he seemed to fall, but there wasn't a chair beneath him to fall into, so he landed on the ground. He stayed there, sitting up, relief apparent on his face.

Frank grinned and congratulated Sirius.

James's relief wore from his face, covered by a slightly puzzled look.

I found myself slightly startled by James's reaction and studied Sirius for a minute as he shot James a look and mouthed, "I need to talk to you soon," with everyone but Liza oblivious to that as she hugged him. Lize shot her brother a puzzled look that he returned.

Sirius turned to me.

"That's great," I told him seriously as I hugged him quickly.

Joan, who had been silent ever since Sirius had arrived, stood slowly. Sirius turned towards her and waited. For a moment they just stared at each other. For a long time they stood. Finally, Joan stepped toward him, and he gave her a small smile. She stared at him for a moment, but then he pulled her into a hug. They held each other for a moment before seperating. Sirius was... well, it can only be called grinning, but it was a soft sort, and Joan's expression had softened from her usual ice to what can easily be called snow.

After a while of chatting and conversation that Sirius steadfastedly tried to push away from the topic of the trial, Frank had gone up to bed, and Joan hugged Sirius again as Alice and I stood up. We left the "mauraders" and Lize in the common room and went upstairs.

As soon as we were in our empty dorm, Joan dropped onto her bed and said, "He's hiding something."

Alice brushed a comb with dark hair still attatched onto the floor and sat on Diana's bed, "I know. Did you see the looks he was shooting the other boys?"

"I didn't think you all noticed..." I answered.

"Of course we did. We aren't blind, Lily!" Joan snapped before blushing, "Sorry. Hopefully Lize will tell us what happened. Thank goodness he's free, though. I didn't think he'd be released...."

"Neither did I," Alice confessed, "I mean, attempted murder? Even if it was on a..." she coughed, "well, at least he's free, right?"

"Criminal record, though," Joan murmured, "Doubt my parents will be fond of that."

I looked up. Joan never spoke about her family. Ever.

Alice mumbled in agreement before we stayed quiet, all of us sunk into our thoughts. The silence was broken by foot steps on the stairs. Alice sat up, Joan jumped up. I froze. We stared at each other, Alice sitting, Joan half standing, and me curled in a ball on the foot of my bed. For a moment we stood frozen before jumping up and running to the door. Joan was there first, but Alice and I knocked her to the floor outside our door.

Eliza jumped.

"Liza!" we all cried. Alice and I pulled her in while Joan stood.

Eliza looked at us all warily, "Yes?"

"What's going on?" Alice demanded.

Eliza sighed, "I'm not exactly sure. Something was odd with Sirius's trial. We were just trying to figure it out. You'll know soon, I promise."

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Old December 23rd, 2004, 4:05 pm
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A/N: Merry Christmas!

April 8

I’m sitting in the Gryffindor Common Room. It’s night; we had supper a couple hours ago.

Remus is sitting across from me. He’s curled up in a ball with a book on his lap, reading it occasionally. Eliza is next to him, leaning against the arm of the seat, curled up, reading through her Charms essay. James and Sirius are on the couch that connects mine to Eliza’s, goofing off. Joan’s beside me, and Alice and Frank are patrolling the corridors. Peter’s in an armchair near us, reading through his Potions homework.

Joan is twiddling her thumbs, looking between Sirius, Remus, James, Peter, and Eliza. She opens her mouth as if to say something before closing it, every few minutes.

I just nudged her and shot her a look as to say ,”What?” but she shakes her head and goes to playing with her necklace.

A few minutes pass.... James and Sirius are quiet now, they were putting up a racket a few moments ago... silence... I just realised how little of it we get! But something’s telling me that’s not for long...

“All right. I want to know what’s going on Sirius Black! You’ll tell your friends everything that’s going on, but you won’t tell me, and you won’t let them tell us! I’ve got a right to know and if... if....” she suddenly seemed embarrassed by her burst out and ice surfaced over her face as she leaned back into the chair.

Sirius started, staring at her, his eyes growing wide, “I... well... what is it I’m not telling you?” Buying time, clearly.

“You know, what with your court thing and everything. Oh come on Sirius, don’t pretend you don’t have the faintest idea what I’m talking about. You know,” her voice dripped like slush.

Sirius sighs heavily and leans back, “I’m free of punishment... shouldn’t that be all that matters?”

“No,” I put in, “It shouldn’t be! All she wants to know is what happened, and what’s going on!”

Sirius sighed again, “Well...” he starts carefully, “I’m not completely sure.”

Joan crosses her arms, a scowl deepening into her face.

“Sorry... Let’s see... I went into the room... it was nearly a full criminal trial.. ‘Attempted Murder’ is rather bad. See, it could be taken for acting like a Death Eater. Mr. Potter, James’ dad, was there. Apparently he was my defense, or something. So they ask questions, and he vouches for me, I suppose you could say. Probably with out him, I would have received a term in Azkaban, but apparently, this won’t get on my record, but if something like this happens again, I’m in a bit of trouble.”

Joan looked at him, puzzled, “So Mr. Potter was there, and he helped keep you out of trouble? Now you’re on a sort of probation?”

Sirius looked uncomfortable. “Not probation, really, it’s just this is the only time they’ll let this go. They also said that they trusted that I was going to be punished in school enough.”

“So what is there that’s so confusing?” I asked, confused.

Eliza took the floor, “That’s because Dad’s not in the best of terms with the Ministry. They only reason they respect him at all is because he’s a good fighter, and has put a few Death Eaters away. That’s not even that much. It’s because Dad opposes the ministry a good deal. He doesn’t thing that it should be run the way it is. He says that it’s only run by rich men whose only powers lie in their ability to give away money at choice times, and the men in charge are just the messenger boys.That’s how a lot of the really rich pureblood families, like the Malfoys have had so much say in the running of the government. Filthy Death Eaters,” she muttered the last sentence.

James looked at his sister for a moment before nodding in agreement, “She said it. Dad alone being there couldn’t have kept him from being punished more severely.”

“Unless it’s the old respect for the pure bloods,” Eliza said, nodding.

“Aren’t you purebloods?” Remus asked, suddenly.

“Nearly. We’re about as close as you can get without being ‘pure’ in blood,” James answered, “I’m not exactly sure who the last muggle was,” he glanced to Liza.

“Our great-great-great-great-great-grandmother was a muggle,” Eliza filled in, “So we’re close enough to claim it, but we’re not close enough to have the respect that the Malfoys have, or the-”

“-Blacks,” filled in Sirius.

Joan sat there for a moment, “Money?” she asked.

Sirius shook his head, “That’s where the odd part comes in, my parents aren’t as fond as throwing around money, especially not for their failed son, so I’m not sure what’s going on.”

“Failed?” I asked, puzzled.

“I’m in Gryffindor, and I’m friends with half-bloods and muggle borns,” came the quiet reply.

“Oh,” I said, comprehending.

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Old January 2nd, 2005, 1:34 am
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April 23

It's been so long since I've written in this... Easter has come and gone, and so has another full moon.

I haven't written for a couple weeks simply because I wanted Alice to think that I lost/gave away/threw in the rubish bin/burned this book. Drove her nuts until she found it in the bottom of my books, tucked into a book we needed for second year Defense Against the Dark Arts! I think she knew I was teasing her, but... all those nights she spent trashing my dormitory, searching, and looking! She drove Eliza to tears from laughter. And then she found it, less than a half hour ago before ordering me to "write."

So I'm writing.... maybe I should fill up a couple pages with nonesense..... yes, I will...

I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.I hate writing.

There... she glanced over and gaped when she saw what I was writing... She hit me over the head, too. I'm going to have a bump, that I know.

Let's see.... Easter.

It was the day before Easter, when an owl landed with a thump in front of Eliza and I. Tied to its leg was a rather large package.

"Verde!" Eliza cried, pulling the package of the owl (named Verde?)'s foot. Verde prodded me for some bacon, which I handed over before he flew away.

Eliza wripped open the package as her brother sat beside her, across the table from me.

James grinned, ruffling his hair, "Will you go out with me, Lily?"

I rolled my eyes at him, as was mandatory for such a questiong as I answered, "No."

He cringed, mocking an expression of pain, as he glanced over Liza's shoulder, "Wait, are there four chocolate eggs in here? Shouldn't there just be three?"

Eliza pulled a sheet of parchment out of the package, "I'll see if this mentions that," she answered, unfolding the sheet. She scanned it before announcing, "Well, it says here, 'I've enclosed four of the chocolate eggs in this package, as I'm sure you've already noted. One's for you two, James and Liza, and the other two are for Sirius, although I'm sure he'll eat some of the other eggs as well, and your friend, Lily Evans,'" she looked up, meeting my eyes, "One's for you, Lily," I gaped at her as she pulled one of the gold wrapped eggs out of the packaging and handed it to me.

I stared at the egg in my hand, "Why?"

James spoke up, "We told Mum about... you know, and she must've taken it into her head to mother you, as well," he sounded apologetic.

"Tell her I said thank you," I said, quietly, my throat feeling odd.

It was a good chocolate egg!

Nothing horrible happened during full moon. Great, now I feel bad about that! Of course something bad happened, but nothing unusual for full moon. Remus went to his spot the Whomping Willow protects, and came out exhausted, and limping slightly.

Alice has finally stopped watching me.

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Old January 4th, 2005, 12:34 am
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April 26

Needless to say, something happened, just like it always does.

Eliza and I were in the library studying. Eliza was looking up something about one of Jupiter's moons when she froze. She leaned back in he tattered old book in her hands, going pale. Suddenly she turned to me.

"Lily, do you know where James is?"

I stared at her for a moment, "Why would I?"

Swearing, she leapt to her feet, packing her books into her bag. I stared at her for a long moment before asking, "What's going on, and why do you need James?"

"Oh, it's just... well..." not pausing, she gave me a sidelong look.

I shoved my books into my bag. Eliza grabbed the rest of the books and ran over to a shelf before slipping them on.

"Come on."

We ran down the corridor and a few staircases, before we ended up in a nearly empty corridor. Eliza slid to a stop, swore again, and dropped her bag to the floor.

I stared for a minute, my own bag slipping to the stone floor.

James and Snape, in an argument in the center of the corridor, about two hundred feet in front of us. Neither noticed us, and both were in the processes of pulling out their wands. Suddenly, Snape's eyes snapped over to us, his eyes resting on Eliza.

Shoving aside a startled Mr. Potter, Snape came over and suddenly Eliza was in an argument with Snape.

"Don't touch my brother you little-"

"Why would I want to touch a-"

Shouting over each other in some pent up argument that confused me beyond reason, both pointed wands at eachother. James and I exchanged puzzled looks as a duel began.

I don't remember many details, but all of the sudden, Sirius, Remus, and Peter fell through the portrait beside the duelers, knocking both over. Remus sat up, staring.

The duel was at an end. Snape was scrambling up, and Eliza stayed on the floor, watching, pale. Snape was tapped on the shoulder, by James. He turned, but was immediately shoved by James.

"Don't touch my sister-"

Peter came over and whispered "How long have they been up to this?"

"Too long," I answered.

Remus slipped over to Eliza, and talked to her, clearly checking to see if she was hurt.

"James," Eliza said loudly, "I'm fine."

The two were still in a scuffle.

Remus sat back on his heels,"She really is."

Finally, Eliza and Remus dragged James of Snape.

Sirius just glowered.

Later, I asked Remus what that was all about. His answer was, 'Snape's mad because Sirius got off so easily. See, he never had anyone, or any wealth, to back him up. So he takes it out on who he can. Eliza, me, Peter, James, maybe you, sometime.'

I'm sure I explained that too rushed, but it happened like that. I only got a few things....

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Old January 19th, 2005, 6:07 pm
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April 28

Today was.... well.... I'm not positive as to what it was, but I know it wasn't good. I suppose it sort of began at lunch.

Alice, Joan, Sirius, Eliza, James, Remus, Peter, and I were all eating lunch together. (Frank was dragged away by his friends, Trent Thomson and Adam Olsen, no idea where they went.) Joan and Sirius were sitting awkwardly beside each other, James next to Remus, and Peter across from Remus. I sat next to Peter, and Eliza sat beside me, across from Sirius, while Alice was across from Joan and beside Lize.

Alice was teasing Sirius, who was making faces at her in return. Joan was quiet, smiling and laughing every so often. James asked me out about twelve times, and the first few times, I just answered, "No!" and then I kicked him in return after that. Remus teased James, saying that those would be his favorite injuries, and I answered I could give him a scar to remember me by when he was an old unmarried man.

Peter commented every once in a while, but Eliza was silent the whole meal. She'd been silent the whole day, now that I remember. Not a word during breakfast, and not a word when I saw her between classes.

"Yes, but you'll wake up every morning, roll over, see some ugly git beside you and think to yourself, 'Oh! Why didn't I marry that handsome, witty fellow from Hogwarts! He would have been a wonderful husband, but instead, I married this fool! What was I thinking?'"

"Yes, what was I thinking not marrying Remus!" I said dramatically, and Remus choked into his meat pie.

"You'll be so deso...." he suddenly broke of realising, "But, you know-"


Everyone glanced up. (Well, everyone that I've mentioned.)

Eliza was staring out into space, her expression puzzled and sort of worried.

James studied her for a moment, "Lize? Liza? Elizabeth!"

'Elizabeth' jumped and stared at him as if she'd never seen him in her life. Then she blinked, and her face cleared, before frowning and snapping, "Don't call me Elizabeth!"

James grinned, "Anytime," his face grew serious, "Are you okay?"

She stared, "Am I okay? Yes, I'm fine." Her eyes widened, "Oh!Well, I don't know. I mean, something's going on, but I don't know and it's not good." The words tumbled out of her mouth.

James nodded, obviously understanding what I had failed to comprehend. Maybe it's just because they're siblings, because from everyone else's puzzled expressions, they didn't know. Sirius and Remus weren't as puzzled as everyone else, I could see, but they were no where near comprehending her.

"Do you know..." James asked, trailing off.

She shook her head, "No, but it can't be good."

They were silent the rest of the day.

After dinner, however:

Everyone sat in the common room. (By everyone, I again mean, everyone previously mentioned. Frank, Adam, and Trent went off to the Kitchens, I think.)

Eliza was in pretense of reading a chapter for Charms, but she was staring into the fire, instead. James and Sirius played chess, causing a din. Remus elbowed Eliza and nodded to her homework, he himself working. She nodded and went back to reading, but after a matter of seconds she was staring back into the fire. Peter was filling up a sheet of parchment for Transfiguration, and I was working with him.

It seemed normal, for a moment. Normality hasn't been a part of out lives very often, but this was as close as it can get. Of course, like all normal times, it came to an end very quickly.


James, shouting at his knight, didn't notice, "Come on! Come on! It's just-" before he noticed the owl in the window. He paused, exchanged confused looks with his sister, who was sitting on the couch, watching the owl warily.

"What is it?" I whispered to Sirius.

"The Potter's owl," He whispered back.

James got up, and opened the window. The owl ruffled, hooting imperiously, and sticking out its leg.

James removed the letter, and the owl flew over to Liza, where she (I think) nipped Liza's fingers. Eliza stroked the bird, watching her brother. He unrolled the parchment, reading it quickly, before sinking onto his chair.

Eliza slipped off her chair, bringing the owl with her, and went over to her brother. Reading the letter, she sighed, her face dark.

"That's everyone, isn't it?"

"Except Mum and Dad," James replied.

"And Gran and Josh."

"Josh is a Squib, remember?"

"Yes, but still..."

"What does it say?" Sirius asked, looking concerned.

Eliza cleared her throat,
"Dear Children,
We hope you are well. We hope you haven't lost every single point Gryffindor once possessed, and we hope you haven't reduced your dorms to rubble. We hope you don't cause to much trouble, but just enough to bother the teachers. They need some rousing. We hope you have a stash of pranks where you can get to them easily. Tell Sirius we hope these this for him as well.

We fear this carries bad news, as do many of the owls in these days. Your Aunt Mauve and Uncle Joseph have passed on. Their bodies were found in the rubble of their homes just this after noon. Yet, I'm sure you know that, or knew something happened of that sort. They will be buried quietly, as was their wish, and they asked us not to give them a funeral, but just flowers on their graves when possible. Your Father is in grieving, as he is for these matters, as is natural, and as I am.

Stay safe, children, don't get into too horrible of trouble.

With all our love, to Sirius also,

Mother and Father"

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Old March 6th, 2005, 2:39 am
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April 30

Something really odd just happened. I suppose that really it isn't so strange, but it rarely happens. Practically never. I mean, they- Oy, start over:

Eliza and James had a huge row today. An hour ago, actually. They never do that. I mean, the pick on each other, they tease, they mock, they get into short arguments, they play tricks on each other, but they never have rows...

"James! Just shut it, okay?" Eliza snapped, looking up from the book she was reading. I walked in near the end of what James was saying, but couldn't make head nor tail of it.

"Elize, really, if you'd just-"

"Everything would be perfect would it?" She asked, lowering her book, her eyes glinting.

"No, but honestly it-"

"James, no matter what, you can't change it! This is between me and-"

"And you'd better handle it, then," he leaned forward, serious and intense like I've never seen him.

"What do you think I'm trying to do?" she asked, challenging.

"I think you aren't taking this seriously."

Wait... James telling someone to take something seriously? Oh dear, something's not right here. Anyone have Veritaserum?

"Not taking it seriously?!" Eliza dropped her book shaking in anger,"And what would you be doing James? You'd be running around having a grand time, not even caring that-"

James stared at her as she said the first few words, but then started to grow red, "Is that what you think? That I can't take anything seriously?"

"James you can't take anything seriously!" She hissed.

"What do you think I'm doing right now, then?"

Remus, Sirius and Peter came down from the boy's dormitory. They notice Eliza and James and froze.

"You're being an over-reactive, over-protective git, that's what!"

"You are an irresponsible little-"

Eliza stood up, yelling so loud it was hard to make out her words, but perhaps James could, because he stood up, and openned his mouth to reply when Eliza took a deep breath and said, calmly, "And I don't care what you think, it's none of your buisness, and I never want to speak to you again." And she grabbed her cloak from the chair she was just in, and strode out, slamming the portrait closed behind her.

There was silence as we all gaped after her. Finally, James realised what happened and went for the door, Sirius following, but Remus stopped them both, suddenly taking charge, "I don't think she's going to be happy to see you, James. Just calm down and stay in here. Sirius, Lily, Peter make sure he does that. I'll go after her."

And once again, someone left, leaving us frozen behind them. At least Remus shut the portrait gently, apologizing to the Fat Lady.

James sat back in his chair, pale, "I can't believe she- her-" he said, angry, but shaken.

That was over an hour ago, and Eliza just came in...

The portrait swung open, and Eliza slipped in, looking around quickly. Remus came in behind her, nudged her and whispered in her ear, Eliza noticed me and hurried over, Remus following.

"Where's James?" she asked, slipping into the chair beside me. Remus dropped into the chair facing ours.

"He went upstairs shortly after you left," I answered, "Sirius said he's sulking."

Remus laughed, "Probably because you wouldn't give him a kiss to sooth his wounded pride more than anything."

Eliza choked, nodding, mischief clear in her eyes. I groaned and put my head in my arms.

"So how was your walk?" I asked brightly.

"After she stopped trying to hex me, fine," Remus answered cheerfully.

"I thought you were James!" Eliza said defensively.

"Yes, I have messy black hair, glasses, and a blown up head," Remus answered seriously.

Eliza made a face at him before pulling her legs up onto her chair, curling into a ball.

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Old April 10th, 2005, 3:30 am
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May 1

One would think that after the row yesterday, the tensions would have worn off a bit. One would think, at least. However, that is not the case.

Eliza is completely avoiding her brother, while James is either trying to find her, or at least making sure she's not alone. When ever Eliza finds this out, she mutters something about meddling gits, and disappears for a few hours.

It's really odd, because between the pair of them, the most pranks are pulled off. Sirius has been trying to fill the silence with loud bangs and the smell of Dungbombs. I think he's really disturbed. His friends are acting odd, and I doubt he knows why. Their row yesterday made little to no sense.

Eliza just stepped in, looked for her brother, didn't see him, and is walking over to me. Hold on a moment.

Okay, here's what she said:

Eliza: Hello, Lily!

Me: Hello!

She sat down, grinning, "So, where is my fool of a brother?"


"How many other brothers do I have?" she laughed.

"I don't know, and I don't exactly care where, as long as it's not here!"

"How many times did he ask you out today?"

"Er... four... no, five, I forgot the time in Transfiguration. He shouted it across the class. McGonagall looked like she wasn't sure whether to put him in detention or laugh."

"Really?" she laughed, "That sounds like him."

I paused, not sure whether to voice what I was wondering, but went ahead with it anyway, "So, what is up with you and James?"

Eliza paused as if considering what to say, "He's being his usual arrogant self, and I'm trying to avoid him so he won't try and save me from.... actually, I'm not even sure what..." she trailed off, laughing uncertainly.

I nodded, if anything, more confused, but I didn't want to press, so we sat in silence until the portrait banged open. Eliza looked up, but seeing James she started digging in her pockets, throwing stuff on the table.

A comb, inkpellets, dungbombs, her wand, fireworks, a half eaten bar of chocolate, string, a quill, parchment, marbles, a glove.... on and on, until the table was covered, and her pockets were empty.

She swore softly, and started to fill her pockets again.

"How do you fit all that in there?" I asked, but never got my answer, because James sat beside me, across from his sister, and said, "Where have you been all day?"

"The Forbidden Forest," came the reply, but when Eliza looked at James, her eyes narrowed, "Honestly, James, what's wrong with you?"

"Nothing," he sighed as he met Eliza's eyes, "Fine, I'm worried, okay? Everyone has been killed in our family, everyone. Everyone but our Mum's mum, and our squib cousin, and our parents?"

Eliza nodded, "I know," she said softly, "But I don't think you need to lose it just yet. Gran taught me well, you hear? So quit worrying and go help Sirius. I think he's about to wet himself."

Although I'm not sure what she meant about Sirius, that's that. I couldn't get much from her other than that, without prying. Of course, that might no be a bad idea...

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Old July 3rd, 2005, 3:24 am
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May 7

The Professors have decided, in light of the fact that we have exams in a month, to all give us as much homework as they can think of so we don't have time to breathe, let alone eat, sleep, and do the other important things we need to do to survive.

I suppose you can say we've had a lot of homework. It must be a lot if I'm complaining about it, since I rarely mind that much.

Eliza is enjoying the benefits of being a fifth year: O.W.L.s

I think the poor girl will pass out if she's forced to read one more sentence. I think James and Sirius would tease her about it, but even they are scarcely visible behind stacks of books of parchment.

Do my eyes decieve me?

Sirius Black and James Potter are doing homework rather than play a prank? I think we need to make this a holiday.... except, I'd rather not have this much homework every May 7 for the rest of my life. Shame. It was a nice idea.

I'm taking a break from my homework to try to unfog my mind. That's probably a bad idea, because I still have three feet of essays left to do. Two on the Patronus for Defense Against the Dark Arts, and one for Transfiguration.

I'd better get back to work. Joan just came from the Library with the books we'll need for the Defense Against the Dark Arts essay.

A/N: Don't hurt me! I know I haven't updated in months and months and months, but I'm working on changing that. Please post feedback!

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Old July 5th, 2005, 4:55 pm
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May 14

Last night, the common room was actually quiet, so I caught up on my homework. Surprisingly. It tired me out doing it, but it was finally done.

The quidditch team was having practice until past dark, and Sirius was detention again, so the people remaining in the Common Room took that advantage to finish up their homework.

Just before midnight, the team filed into the Common Room, all of them looking tired and disgruntled.

James half-heartedly called across the common room, "Lily! Will you go out with me?" to which I shouted, "No!"

Eliza came across to me, and laughed, "He'll never give up."

I rolled my eyes at her.

Shortly after, I went to bed.

I couldn't sleep for about two hours, which was long after everyone else had gone to bed. I kept thinking about my parents, and about school, and about so many things I couldn't keep one straight from the other. Giving up, I went down to the Common Room. At first glance, it was empty, so I headed towards the fire and sat down in one of the better chairs right by it.

I glanced at the other chairs, and saw Eliza in one not too far from me, gazing into the fire.

She was in her dressing gown, and was watching me, her face set.

"Why are you still down here?" I asked her, watching her carefully. Her face seemed sad, somehow, but she forced a grin.

"Couldn't sleep," she replied, staring into thoals of the dying fire.


Eliza gave me a look, studying me, before she answered, somewhat reluctantly ,"Something's wrong. Something's not right. I can feel it."

We sat in silence for a little while longer, before Eliza got up, and said, "I'm going to try to sleep again. Good Night."

"'Night," I replied, watching her.

James is worried about her. I think the rest of the boys are too. That worries me, because they're never worried. But Eliza just keeps acting more odd as time goes on.

This morning, Alice choked on her corn flakes part way through breakfast, and she handed me the Daily Prophet, her face pale.

I scanned the page she was reading. There was an advertisement for quidditch supplies, an advertisment for new robes, and another for Ollivanders. Then I found it. An article about an attack on a Muggle town. 25 muggles killed, 30 others tortured. I passed the Prophet down to Eliza, who took it. She bit her lip, and handed it to James, who gave her an odd look, looked at it, and passed it to Sirius.

Eliza shoved the rest of her toast in her mouth, picked up her bag, and headed down to class.

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Old July 20th, 2005, 4:34 pm
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May 20

Still nothing but studying. At least this year is better than last. I know that’s odd to say, considering this year has even more homework than last year, but that’s how I feel. I’m only taking the subjects this year that I’ll need, or that I like. I’m taking Charms, Transfiguration, Potions, Herbology, Defense Against the Dark Arts, and Ancient Runes in the N.E.W.T. levels. I’m best at Charms and Potions, in my opinions, and I rather like Charms more. The only reason I’m any good at Potions is because of my mother’s firm belief that if you can’t cook by age of eight, then there’s a problem. It gave me a good base for Potions, even if Potions is more meticulous and smells worse.

Eliza, Alice, and Frank are sitting huddled, studying. All three of them plan to be Aurors, which requires high grades in the basic classes. I’ve heard that it’s rare to have so many in one year try to become Aurors, especially when they have a high chance of becoming that. I know they aren’t alone. There are two or three Ravenclaws, and at least one Hufflepuff, and all of them have a good chance.

James is still being odd where it comes to Eliza, but he’s quieted down. I’ve talked to Remus about it.

“The Potter family has been killed off one at a time, and Eliza’s too headstrong to know when to put her head down and mind her own business,” Remus grinned, “But then, so is James. What I’ve managed to pick up is that James is afraid that Lord Voldemort might,” he hesitated, “Might use Elize somehow.”

Seeing the look on my face, he hurried on, “But don’t worry, okay? It’s just my suspicions, and it might not even be true.”

I’m not so sure that it isn’t. It makes sense, although I’m not sure how she’d be used. She is ideally placed, but... nothing’s sure.

A/N: Hoped you liked it! I have chocolate for anyone who wants to post comments or feedback here!

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Old July 25th, 2005, 4:36 pm
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May 23

I had prefect duty last night. As a prefect, I have to patrol the corridors with another prefect on a rotating schedule. I was with one of the Ravenclaw prefects. (The female sixth year prefect asked me to go for her this time. Usually I would have gone with Remus.)

I came in late from that last night with the intention of finishing my Herbology essay. I found the Common Room empty, except for Remus, who was staring into the fire, looking distracted. He didn’t acknowledge my presence at first, so I went to the table closest to the fire and lit a lamp. I pulled out my essay and started writing.

After a while, Remus came over and sat beside me. As he hadn’t said anything, I didn’t speak but kept writing. After about five minutes, I could distinctly hear thumps and voices coming from one of the boys’ dormitories.

I looked up at Remus, questioning, and he supplied, “Sirius and James.”

“What are they doing?”

Remus shrugged, “Considering what I left them to earlier, it would be lucky if they aren’t attempting to murder each other.”

I laughed, “Why?” I asked, uncertain I really wanted to know.

Remus apparently decided I didn’t need details, and he shook his head, “Nothing, really. Sirius just thinks that James isn’t exactly...” he hesitated, “acting normally.”

“You mean about Lize?”

Remus nodded, “He’s just acting odd. I suppose he has reason behind it, but...”

“But he’s driving us all mad?”

He nodded, his smile lit up by the lamp.

“And you’re down here because...?”

“It was safer to vacate the area.”

I laughed, and he pulled one of my books toward himself, and began flipping through it.

The thuds grew louder, sounding as if the two boys were either chucking stuff at each other, or just chucking each other across the room. Then there was silence, twin thuds, and laughter before a huge crash, followed by sounds of “ow!” and groaning.

Remus was staring at the boys’ staircase apprehensively.

“Was James’s odd behavior the only reason for this?” I asked, trying to keep my voice casual.

He gave me a puzzled look, “The thing is, I’m not entirely sure. When I went in there, they seemed to be arguing about Snape, but somehow it jumped to Liza. I’m not entirely sure how-”

The bang of a door being thrown open echoed through the tower, and James, in his nightclothes with his glasses lopsided leapt down the stairs. He stumbled to a stop upon seeing me and Remus (who he gave a suspicious look before turning back to me, “Will you go out with me, Lily?” he asked.

“I’d rather go out with a thestral,” I muttered.

Remus grinned and stood up as Sirius, who was on all fours, came into view, hurrying down the stairs. He tumbled down the last few stairs, knocking James to the ground.

They all laughed.


A/N:Please post Feedback!!!

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Old August 9th, 2005, 4:25 pm
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May 30

The final Quidditch match of the season was today. As in years past, (and most likely, years to come) the match was led up to by scuffles in the halls and various team members of the opposing sides (Gryffindor and Slytherin) ended up going to the Hospital wing with strange ailments. One was the fact that Eliza had grown a rather long tail, and another being Frank was unable to say any word with an ‘m’ in it, for fear of letting out the loud ‘moo’ sound of a cow. Those were probably some of the more kind hexes.

Anyway, they played, and Gryffindor won by a large margin seven hours later. The final score was 470 to 180. The team was carried off amid cheers to the Gryffindor Common Room, where a huge party celebrating the winning of the Quidditch cup erupted.

It was probably the first time in a few weeks that James and Lize have actually gotten along without either of them acting oddly. James has been acting more normally since whatever that was that happened on the twenty-second. Lize has still avoided James, but that being inevitable tonight, she sat back and enjoyed herself.

The party went on for quite sometime. I enjoyed it thoroughly despite the continuous conversations about Quidditch tactics that flew over my head.

Finally, Eliza took pity on me, and laughed at Frank and James who were trying to engage me in a conversation about Quidditch, saying, “You two! In a couple years, we’ll teach the poor girl how to play Quidditch so well that she can whip you, James, but right now, we should be satisfied with the fact that she has the basic grasp of the game, okay Frank? Now, she doesn’t know what you mean by a Wronski Feint, so drop it!”

Honestly, I was puzzled, although Eliza keeps insisting I’ll be a great Quidditch player at some future point in time (which I highly doubt, but I’ve given up arguing with her). Oh well. I mean, she can get me in the Pitch, on a broom, and I can actually fly on one no problem, but the idea of doing that, being focused on Bludgers, and another ball on top of that, is laughable.

However, since James, Frank, and Lize kept going back to the game, I snuck over to Remus, Sirius, Peter, and Joan, who were laughing and talking about other things.

On the whole, I loved it. It’s not very often that I can spend some time with my friends, not worrying about homework, or Voldemort, of Eliza, or James, but to actually relax and enjoy myself.... that’s becoming more rare.

The food was good, and James only asked my out three times, but in light of the fact he was so cheerful, he didn’t exactly mind he was shot down, and tossed me a butter beer and led me to a different knot of people to talk to.

It’s a shame it couldn’t have gone on longer.

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Old August 16th, 2005, 4:41 pm
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June 20

There hasn’t exactly been much to write about in the last few weeks, unless studying, exams, and the occasional (once a day) prank from the four sixth year Gryffindor boys who call each other Padfoot, Moony, Wormtail, and Prongs.

Today was the last day for exams, including O.W.L.s, so I’m sure the fifth years are thrilled.

It’s just after dinner, and I’m in the Common Room watching Sirius and Remus playing Wizard’s Chess. Joan is sitting next to me, watching the game coolly, her face looking as though it was chiseled from ice. Peter has passed out in the chair across from us, snoring.

James, Liza, Alice, and Frank, haven’t shown there faces yet, which I believe is annoying Sirius, since he wants to throw a post-exams party.

10 minutes later

James just came in, just came in, looking for his sister. I told him he was probably with Alice and Frank, so he nodded and sat across from Joan and me, moving Peter with a Levitating charm.

1 hour later

Frank and Alice have been up here for a bout a half-hour, and there’s still no sign of Lize. James is getting slightly edgy, and finally Sirius told him to “check the map.”

I honestly don’t know what he meant by that, but James clearly did because he nodded and dashed upstairs. He came back down, looking slightly dejected as he said, “She’s not on it.”

This is where Sirius got concerned. So did Remus. “She’s what?” he asked, staring at James. Those three hurried over into the corner and began to confer quietly. In the meantime, Frank called over his best friends, Adam and Trent.

They came over, and Frank asked them, casually, if they’d seen Liza.

Adam grinned and replied, “Not since the Defense Against the Dark Arts practical. She looked like she got an ‘O’ on it. Did better than me, at least, but I haven’t seen her since. Sorry, mate.”

Frank nodded and said it was fine, and they stayed over here, talking to us. They’re not bad boys, but I was too busy trying to see what was going on over in the corner to talk to them too much. I hope they didn’t mind.

Meanwhile, in the corner, the boys seemed to have split in to three camps. From what I could observe (and can, they’re still talking, bending over a piece of parchment), James seems to have one course of action to follow, Sirius another, and Remus is trying to keep them from dueling it out.

A While Later

Finally, they seemed to come to a decision. By this time, it was pretty late, and it was dark. They moved out of the corner, and made as if to carry what ever plan they had concocted without us, but Frank called them over to us.

“What have you decided?” Frank asked, leaning back in his chair, his arms draped over the back.

“We’re going to look for her!” James said impatiently.

Now, how it took them an hour and a half deciding that, I’ll never know, but instead of pointing this fact out, I replied flatly, “We’re going with you.”

James stared at me, “What? No, you can’t.”

Alice sided with me, leaning forward. “Yes, we can. We care about Liza just as much as you lot do!”

The boys exchanged looks. They seemed about to argue, but Joan said coldly, “With or without your mighty approval, we’re going.”

James sighed. “Fine. Who’s going?”

“I am,” said Joan, Alice, Frank, me, Remus, and Sirius at once. Peter grunted in his sleep.

James glanced down at him and sighed, “I doubt he’d wake up if we tried. First we should split up into groups-” he said, and Remus interrupted, “Pairs might work.”

James nodded, “Er... yeah, pair up.”

Joan went straight to Sirius, and Alice with Frank. James stared between me and Remus, and Remus said flatly, “James, you go with Lily. I’ll go by myself.”

I was about to argue that he shouldn’t go alone, but she shook his head, saying, “If I go in the forest, I won’t be bothered too much as a werewolf, full moon or not, but if I went with a human” (I argued that he was human, but he waved that aside) “The passage through wouldn’t be so easy.”

I nodded, pretending this made sense. Thinking about it now, I suppose it does make sense.

Now they’re debating who will go where. Remus and James and I are going into the forest. The problem is neither Frank and Alice nor Joan and Sirius want to be left in the castle. James and Remus are sorting out signals on the other side of me. Something about different sparks...

It looks like we’re about ready to go. Sirius and Joan will search the castle, and Alice and Frank will play messengers. They’ll get help if we put up red sparks. James passed them a mirror, explaining they can use it to get contact with Sirius. James has pulled out that invisibility cloak of his.

I suppose this is it.

A/N: So. You should know what to do in order to find out what happens, right? Click here for feedback.


Last edited by GryffindorSeeker; August 16th, 2005 at 4:46 pm.
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Old March 31st, 2006, 1:43 am
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Re: The Diary of.... Me

June 22



It's hard to believe all that has happened in the past two days. But, that's what went on. That's how it came about.

I need to put this in order, to make this understandable. Okay.

James, Remus, Alice, Frank, and I squeezed beneath that Invisibility cloak of James's. It didn't work too well, and the cloak hung around our knees. We realised this, so Remus decided he's take the cloak back and forth so we could get through reasonably. He took James and me first, then went back for Alice and Frank. James and I hurried across the starlit grounds until we reached the Forbidden Forest, where we halted, waiting for Remus. We stood, hidden by the shadows, our senses alert. James was impatient to get going. He paced and fidgeted, fingering his wand and ruffling his hair. I stood, anxious and still.

We waited, until finally, what could hardly have been fifteen minutes later, when Remus dashed up to us. I'm not entirely sure how suprised I should have been at how well the boys know the forest, but they pointed out which trails we would go on. They spoke quickly, finishing eachother's sentances, talking as though I wasn't there. I didn't mind too horribly, since I couldn't have contributed to the conversation at all.

"Make sure you don't go left," "No, we wouldn't want to run into that-" "If you go too far down, you'll hit a dead end..." "...of sorts"

Finally, when they had sorted out where to go, James grabbed my hand as Remus turned away, and we took off into the forest, wands in hand. We ignited our wands not too far in, when it grew too dar to see even eachother. We moved quickly, our eyes and ears straining to find out where Eliza was. James seemed to know where to go instinctively, as we found out later, he was chasing down the same trail Eliza had passed through.

After what could have been minutes or hours, James stopped, and I nearly stumbled into him at his abrupt halt.

"Wait here" he whispered.

"James-" I started, but he was gone, and I watched as a dark shape hurtled from me. I could have sworn this shape wasn't human. It was too large, too fast, and too graceful in these woods.

Suddenly, behind me, I could hear the crunching of leaves. For a moment, I thought it was just the paranoia of being left alon, but then I realised it was not my imagination.

"Look at what we have here," a human voice sneered, and I felt a hand on my shoulder.

I choked, then finding my voice shrieked, "JAMES!!!!!!" in a voice I could never call my own, but I felt ropes twisting around me and my wand was pulled from my hands. I could hear scuffles from a little ways off that told me that he too was caught.

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